If You Could See What I See
by minnimoi
Summary: Three years after the end of the war, Hermione finds that she has been left behind by her closest friends. Hurt , she decides to make some big changes in her life and start afresh. AU obviously, as Remus, Tonks and Sirius are very much alive. RLNT, eventual HGSB.
1. Chapter 1: Time for a Change

**Disclaimer: Obviously, I don't own it. JK Rowling owns all Harry Potter characters and the Potterverse. **

_A/N: This is my very first home-grown fanfic ever, and so I obviously don't have a beta yet. Read and Review, but please, be gentle!_

Hermione stared at the note in her hand, the familiar scrawl blurred by the tears slowly filling her dark brown eyes. She sniffed loudly, and threw the note on the mahogany desk, it's usually soothing woody scent today rendered ineffective by the hurt and outrage swirling through her. "How _could_ they?" She cried aloud. She jumped out of the stiff backed leather chair and paced through the library. It said much for the strength of her emotions that she could find no comfort in this room, her sanctuary and unquestionably her favourite room in the house.

She whirled abruptly and seizing the offending parchment, read it once more, carefully, examining every word.

_Dear Hermione,_

_Just a quick note to let you know that we are have decided to take a few weeks break on the French Riviera, so we'll have to take a rain check on dinner tomorrow night. Catch you some other time, have fun with the others._

_Take care._

_Harry, Ginny, Ron and George_

She flung the note back onto the desk and starting pacing again. A rain check. They hadn't even managed to remember what the dinner was for- it was her twenty first birthday tomorrow. Granted, she hadn't mentioned the reason behind the dinner, but surely, after ten years of knowing one another she thought it wasn't too much to ask that they remembered her birthday. Especially her twenty first.

And have fun with the others- ha! If she knew anything, Harry, Ron, Ginny and George were probably in France by now, and the only others left were Remus, Tonks, Sirius and his girlfriend, Lira. Luna Lovegood was currently in Sweden hunting for creatures hitherto unknown to man, whilst Neville had been on a Herbology scholarship in Africa for the past two years. Considering Remus and Tonks had to get home to Teddy, and so would have to leave fairly early in the evening, that meant she, Sirius and Lira would be left to 'party on', a grand total of three people. It would be less embarrassing to just cancel the dinner altogether than explain why practically no one else was there, including her so called 'best friends'.

She sank down into a leather couch on the opposite side of the room and buried her head in her hands. _How had this happened?_ She thought. They were the best of friends at school, and stood by one another through the dark years of the War, their loyalty and friendship unquestioned. She could remember the Battle of Hogwarts as if it were yesterday, rather than three years ago. She remembered the relief they had felt that it was finally over. The shared grief over the loss of Fred, Remus and Tonks. She remembered the hope and fear she had felt when she found that Remus and Tonks were not, in fact, dead, but rather, dangerously injured due to the unknown curse they had been hit with. The fear of losing them a second time had hung over them all for weeks, until the two had fully recovered. She remembered comforting George for the loss of Fred, staying with him and soothing his nightmares for months, brewing him dreamless sleep potion. She remembered the loss she had felt on finding her parents had died in an automobile accident in Australia, and the difficulty with which she had concealed the loss from her friends so as not to add to the already heavy burden of losing Fred.

She remembered the day two years ago she had been working in the Department of Mysteries (the Unspeakables having poached her immediately after the belated completion of her seventh at Hogwarts) when the Veil had seemed to come alive, swirling and billowing in an unseen gale. Suddenly a man had stumbled out, peered at her and mumbled _'Bloody hell!'_ before promptly collapsing at her feet.

She could remember the joy with which Sirius had been welcomed back, the relief and sheer happiness on Harry's face when he had rushed to St Mungo's to find his Godfather demanding to be _'let out of this bloody nut farm'_ and the many happy gatherings they had to celebrate.

She frowned. She could also remember when it had started to change, about a year ago. It had all started when Ginny and Harry had finally started dating again after the War. Ginny didn't like the 'boring' weekly catchups at the Three Broomsticks, she wanted glamour and glitz. She liked Harry to take her to the best restaurants and clubs. The petite redheaded beauty had no problem being in the public eye- she loved the public and the public loved her. Hermione had begun to see less and less of them as time wore on, as they always had 'places to go and people to see' according to Ginny.

Ron, a mere two months later, had managed to land his dream job as keeper for the Chudley Cannons and had consequently disappeared off her radar. She now saw him most often in the Daily Prophet, photographed at many of the glitzy clubs that Harry and Ginny frequented, with a beautiful woman hanging off either arm.

Floo calls were few and far between, Harry and Ginny because of their jobs as an auror and fashion editor respectively, in addition to their very full social life, and Ron between his practices, matches and partying- and also, she admitted, because was not exactly known for his social awareness and consideration.

George she saw occasionally, but he spent most of his time with Percy at WWW. He remained very withdrawn and did not socialise often.

On the surface, it seemed very innocent. Inevitable. They had all grown up and life had taken them in different directions. However, that simply didn't hold true. Sure, they all had jobs now. And yes, a certain amount of distance was bound to creep in when members of the group started dating. But considering they lived within 15 minutes of each other, surely it wasn't that unreasonable to expect to see each other on a semi-regular basis? And considering she and Harry both worked at the Ministry, surely an occasional lunch together wasn't too much to ask?

It wasn't as if she didn't put in the effort. She didn't ask anything of her friends that she didn't ask of herself. She tried to floo call them regularly, at least once a week. She attempted to organise outings for them. They had gone from seeing one another once a week to once a month...and now this. She hadn't seen them in six months. Half of her floo calls went unanswered whilst the rest were short as they were 'on their way out'. She laughed bitterly. Funny they all had time to go out together, just...not with her. Not once had one of the three thought of asking her to go out with them. Sadly, her three closest friends had slowly phased her out of their existence.

Others made some effort, but they simply were not as close as she, Ron, Harry and Ginny had been. Luna corresponded regularly by owl, but was seldom in England, due to her travels as an investigative reporter for the Quibbler. Neville wrote from Africa on occasional, but they had never been particularly close.

She visited Remus and Tonks every fortnight to see Teddy, her (and Harry's) godson, and spend some time with her them, as having a young child made it very difficult for them to go out often.

Sirius she also saw every couple of weeks, however, since he and Lira had started dating she had not been able to see him for more than a couple of hours at a time, and understandably so. The man worked long hours as a Senior Auror, and had to balance a relationship on top of that. The fact that he always made time for her nonetheless meant a great deal to her. He refused to miss their fortnightly catchup, no matter how short said catchup might be. He always said it was worth it to trek out to the Three Broomsticks or her flat, even if only for an hour, to see 'his Mione'. Surprisingly, ever since his return from the veil, they had become quite close friends, despite their clashes before. Perhaps it was because she had matured and changed over the five years he had been trapped in the Veil, perhaps it was because he had also matured. Either way, they got along extremely well, and she greatly enjoyed his sharp wit and keen mind. However, the sad fact remained that even her so called 'best friend's' godfather had made time for her, and yet Harry himself...

She leaned back into the couch and, as she finally admitted it to herself, tears running down her face. It had _not_ all started when Harry and Ginny began dating. It had always been there, buried beneath the surface. She had merely chosen to dismiss it as differences between friends. But it was, she had to admit so much more than that. She had been loyal to them all, but to Harry first and foremost since the very beginning of their friendship. She had stayed with him until the almost the very end, when she physically could not enter the chamber when Harry had faced Quirrell. She had stuck by him when the students had branded him 'The Heir of Slytherin'. She had been petrified after having found the answer to the riddle, enabling Harry to save Ginny and destroy the basilisk.

She had done everything in her power to protect him from Sirius Black, a man then thought to be determined to kill Harry. She had risked her friendship with him by telling Minerva about the broom. She would much rather he hate her than that he come to any harm. Harry had followed Ron's lead and ignored her for weeks, virtually until the broom was returned. Despite this, she had broken the laws of time travel and willingly risked her life to go back in time and save Sirius, for Harry. In fourth year, she was the only one who believed Harry when he said he had not entered the tournament. Even Ron had cut him off, overcome by jealousy. She had done her best by him in fifth year, trying to defend him against Umbridge, trying to help him when he attempted to withdraw into himself, cutting short her ski trip with her parents to come and comfort him at Grimmauld Place.

She had begged him to be careful rather than go dashing off to the Ministry, but had nonetheless gone willingly with him and fought at his side, and suffered for it. She tried to help him in sixth year and was worried about that wretched Potions book, only to be accused of jealousy, despite it having been owned by a former Death Eater as they later discovered. She fought to defend Hogwarts that night that Dumbledore died, along with the Order and Ron and a few other students. She had sat by Ron's side when he had been poisoned. She had left her home and willingly sent her family away after removing her existence from their memories to follow them both in a dangerous Hunt for the Horcruxes. She had stayed loyal even when Ron had given up and deserted them. She stayed and defended Harry, and planned, and worked so hard that at times she thought she would drop from sheer exhaustion. She was captured and tortured but gave nothing away, staying loyal to them both and to the cause.

She had broken into Gringotts and eventually fought at the final battle until the very end. She had lost her parents and sacrificed everything she had to aid Harry. She had been nothing but true and loyal to both Harry and Ron. She had forgiven Ron despite his abandoning her and Harry, despite the horrible, hurtful things he often said to her. She had been willing to look past the constant arguments and bickering, helping them both constantly with their school work.

And Ginny? She had listened and comforted her when struggling with her feelings for Harry, and her worry that he would never notice her. She had advised and counselled her, enabling her to finally get things started with Harry.

And where did it get her? True, they had defended her from the troll in first year, despite it being Ron's fault she was in there in the first place. Ron had defended her from being called a Mudblood. But he had also insulted and hurt her countless times, the most memorable being the Yule Ball. He had acted as if she were less than female but yet was angry she had gone with Victor. He and Harry had also sided against her on the Firebolt issue, treating her as if she didn't exist. Harry had not once defended her against Ron's slurs. And Ginny, the minute she had had her chance with Harry, had turned on Hermione. She snapped and argued and belittled her for all to hear. She always apologised afterwards, but still...Hermione had to face facts. What she put into the friendship, and the loyalty she gave her friends was not returned in proportion. She gave more than she ever recieved. That had not changed, rather, it had grown more pronounced, until _this._ This was the culmination, the final proof.

Harry, Ron and Ginny did not need her anymore. She had outlived her usefulness. What use was a bossy, know it all bookworm when they were not at school anymore? When they were no longer at war? Now that it was all over, they had made it very clear, in deed if not in word, that they had no further use for her. A very small part of her mind protested, saying they had been through too much together for them to forget her, however, she ruthlessly quashed it. How had she ever believed otherwise, when to this day, not one of them had asked after her parents? Not one had asked if she had found them, if they were well? Only Sirius, Remus and Tonks knew. They had seen her crying over some photo albums one day, and had pestered her until she had told them. She told them on the proviso that they were not to tell anyone else unless they were directly asked. If people didn't care enough to ask, they didn't deserve to know, in her opinion. By people, she had meant Harry, Ron and Ginny. Her two 'best friends' and her 'sister'. So called. Ha. So much for that.

And now here they were, going off on holiday without even asking her if she wished to come, forgetting the 'dinner' they were missing was her 21st birthday. She began to sob. Not once since they had battled that troll in the girl's bathrooms all those years ago had she thought it would come to this. Not merely missing a birthday dinner, but rather what it represented. Practically fighting tooth and nail to hold onto a friendship they no longer valued. Her 21st birthday, which she had thought would be filled with love and laughter and family, was now a hollow mockery. They had left. They had forgotten it all together. They had forgotten everything she had given and what she had sacrificed to be with them and to help them, Her life. Her childhood. Her parents. All forgotten.

She was once more Beaver the Brains. She sobbed even harder, remembering that name so kindly gifted to her by a number of bullies in primary school. She had had bushy hair, knobby knees and protruding buck teeth. She had always been reviled for her brains, and books were her only friends. Her mother had comforted her, telling her that she would grow to be a beautiful young woman, with lots of friends, and young Hermione had waited and hoped, wishing for it to be true.

Instead, the same pattern had looked to continue throughout Hogwarts- loneliness and bullying, until Harry and Ron. After that, she had thought she would never be alone again. And now...She sniffed, scrubbing her tears viciously away with her hands. She may no longer have buckteeth or bushy hair. Her hair may fall in ringlets to the middle of her back. She may now have a figure of sorts, albeit too...rounded for her taste. She may even have developed some skill with basic makeup, and be the youngest Unspeakable in the history of the Department of Mysteries, but she was right back where she started. Beaver the Brains. Alone, surrounded by books and wishing she were someone, ANYONE else so she wouldn't be home alone while everyone was out enjoying themselves. The cruelty was that those children, so long ago, who had probably forgotten that she had even existed, were proven to be right. She was alone and friendless. She had known she would never be a beauty, like Ginny, but so long as she had her friends, she hadn't cared. Evidently, they _had_. Why else would they have avoided taking her on their glamorous social outings? They were ashamed of her. She was something to hide away when people were looking, someone to be seen in private, where people couldn't see her.

It was all starting again...

NO. She sat up suddenly. It was NOT starting again. She would not allow herself to think that way. She was not that lost little girl anymore. She was a successful young woman who had achieved much in her short life. She may have lost those she considered closest, she may have lost her parents and yes, she might be, for all intents and purposes, alone without ever having had a single boyfriend, but she was not worthless. She had a job, and there were a few who cared for her. Remus and Tonks, darling Teddy, Sirius, and perhaps George. She was not willing to forgo her friendship with George until she had heard his side of the story. She knew it was very unlike him to simply leave for a holiday without at least asking if she wished to accompany him, particularly if it meant missing her birthday. Therefore, for George she would wait and see. As for the other three... screw them. It was over. They had used her for her brains and skills, and now that all was right in their world, they didn't need her anymore. Well, to hell with them. She didn't need them.

She jumped off the couch and began pacing the thick cream-coloured carpet vigorously, this time in thought. It was past time she did something for herself, something she had been thinking of for several weeks now. She had been offered a one year placement in the Italian Ministry of Magic, in their own equivalent of the Department of Mysteries. A former Unspeakable had relocated to Rome and been singing her praises. Consequently, the Italians had been trying to get her for months. This was merely the latest offer in a long series of offers. She had not previously accepted because she was had felt her life was in England, and had worried she was giving the only family she had left.

Now, she had to re-evaluate that idea. Her three closest friends were no longer an issue. Those friends she did have she could continue to visit via floo or international portkey as often as she liked. It would be no disruption in their relationship, as there was a mere two hour time difference between the UK and Italy. Her parents...she blinked rapidly, trying to dispel the tears that had formed. Her parents were no longer here. Their house, the house in which she had grown up, had sat empty and unused since her seventh year. And she had always wanted to go to Rome. More importantly, there was nothing stopping her now. It was time for a change.


	2. Chapter 2: A Truly Advantageous Offer

**Disclaimer: All I own is the plot, the rest belongs to J.K. Rowling.**

_A/N: Well, here's the next chapter. Thank you so much to those lovely people who gave me my first ever reviews- your kind words have given me the confidence to keep posting. Hope you enjoy the next instalment! _

"You're WHAT?"

James Grafton, Head of the Department of Mysteries, was completely gobsmacked. The blatant surprise evident on his lined face was almost comical.

"I've decided to accept the year in Rome." She repeated calmly. "It is a great honour and a wonderful opportunity to learn in one of the most beautiful and ancient places in the world. And the libraries..." She trailed off, smiling.

"Yes, yes, of course...I have no doubt it will be a marvellous opportunity in every way possible, I merely...forgive me, but I am surprised. You have steadfastly refused all offers from the Italians to date, despite any persuasion of mine. I cannot help but wonder what has triggered this change of heart." His lined face looked curiously at her as he scratched at his mop of thick white hair.

She smiled pleasantly at him, the smile not quite reaching her eyes as she adjusted the black robe she wore. "I...communicated with my closest friends, Mr Grafton, and I realised that this offer was very much to my advantage. I would be a fool to let it slide." _No need to tell him it took a letter essentially telling me I wasn't a blip on their collective radar to help me make up my_ _mind_, she thought.

The old man's piercing blue eyes peered into her chocolate brown ones. The girl looked... _numb_, he thought. Something had happened. But it was not his place to press her.

"Of course, my dear," he said aloud. "I am pleased you have accepted this truly advantageous offer. I assume the salary and accommodation are to your liking?"

"How could they not be?" She replied simply. With an all expenses paid apartment supplied by the ministry on the stunning and exclusive Via Veneto, and a salary of 40,000 _regine, _ the equivalent of 50,000 galleons, or 150,000 pounds sterling, the offer was more than generous. As a Ministry official, she also had the right to create international portkeys, something that was far more restricted in Britain.

"Quite," he smiled. "Furthermore, your employment in the Ministry of Magic will be awaiting your return, although something tells me the Italians may try to coax you into a more permanent arrangement whilst you are there."

She merely smiled politely and waited.

"Yes, well, very well, I shall convey your acceptance. When would you be willing to start? I am sure they would be willing to give you a few weeks to set your affairs in order..." he mused.

"That is more than generous, Sir. I am at their disposal as of the day after tomorrow. My belongings have been packed, my affairs are in order and I would be willing to take a portkey tomorrow." She tried to keep her voice steady as she said this. There would be no going back now, and she did not want to betray the slightest hint of nervousness, as that might lead to questions.

"Tomorrow? My word, you certainly are eager. Well, I shall so inform them if you wish, although I cannot help but ask you to delay your departure a few weeks. At least give the Department a chance to farewell you!"

Again she smiled, the warmth not quite reaching her eyes. "You are very kind, Sir, but I must insist. I am very...eager to begin this new phase in my learning."

Grafton frowned, his thick eyebrows knotted together. Yes, something was not right. The old man had a soft spot in his heart for the curly haired girl, who so loved her books and lived to learn. She reminded him of himself at a young age. Besides which, the girl had a heart of gold. Damned impossible _not_ to like. Employer protocol be damned. Something was wrong and he knew, he couldn't explain how, but he _knew, _that someone or something had hurt her deeply.

"My dear, I hope I do not offend for inquiring into your affairs, but what has happened to change your mind? Forgive me, but I am concerned. I have grown...rather fond of you my dear."

She blinked at this somewhat emotional question from the usually gruff head of department. "Thank you for your concern, Mr Grafton, but I assure you I am well." _I can't tell you_, she thought, gratified by his concern.

"Yes, well, it seems you are determined, Miss Granger, and I shall convey your acceptance to Signor Martinelli immediately. He will be very pleased, I'm sure."

She smiled politely. _I seem to be doing that an awful lot today, _she thought.

"My dear, I hope you will forgive an old man his temerity, but I would be very pleased if you would write to me every now and then. I would be delighted to hear how you are settling in and what you think of Rome."

She couldn't help but blink again in surprise. "I...would be very happy to correspond with you Mr Grafton." And she meant it.

He smiled. "As I am now no longer your superior, please call me James."

She nodded and smiled, pleased and surprised. "Very well. Thank you, Si-_James_. Please call me Hermione." She turned to go.

"Oh and Hermione?"

She turned back. "Yes, James?"

"Happy birthday."

Hermione smiled to herself as she left the Ministry of Magic for the last time. _Well, at least the last time for the next year,_ she thought.

She had been so surprised that Mr G- _James, _that_ James, _knew it was her birthday. It was truly touching to know he cared enough to look at her personnel file. She would write to him, she thought. He would make a very interesting correspondent. And he would not be able to tell anyone where she was, due to the Secrecy of the Mysteries, as it was called. It was a binding magical contract every Unspeakable signed, from the lowliest new recruit to the Head of Department, that they would not reveal anything which happened in the Department to anyone outside of it. There was a harsh penalty for breaking the contract, and a two year imprisonment paled next to the loss of magic for a year. She shuddered. In fact, her former colleague (now located in Rome), who had convinced the Italians to hire her in the first place had skirted very close to the edge of that contract in recommending her and praising her skills. The only thing which had saved him had been that he had not mentioned any departmental business, only her abilities.

Luckily, her new employment, as secondment of sorts and not a termination, fell into that wonderful category of "departmental business" and so James could say nothing. Not that she expected anyone to ask, but, still, better to be prepared. She would risk nothing ruining her new life.

_It's time to let go,_ she thought. _It's time to leave all those things behind which remind me of loss and start afresh._

With that thought firmly in her mind, she apparated to the Lupins' House and knocked on the door.

She heard several crashes and someone cursing. _Tonks_, she thought, grinning.

The door was flung open to reveal a pink haired young woman with a heart shaped face, grimacing and rubbing her left elbow.

"Wotcher, Hermione! Happy birthday! You're early. I thought we were supposed to meet you at the Three Broomsticks tonight? Merlin, is it that late?" Tonks gasped, hand on her mouth.

"No, no, dinner wasn't planned until seven. It's only just on four, now, Tonks. It's OK, I...just popped by for a little visit." She smiled nervously.

"Oh, that's alright then. Whew! Thought we were done for, Remus isn't even home from work yet. Come in, come in."

Hermione followed the pink haired auror down the cream coloured corridor and into the sitting room, where a blue haired little boy was currently chewing on the arm of the beige leather couch. He immediately jumped up on seeing Hermione and ran towards her. She swept him up into her embrace and hugged him fiercely.

"Hello Teddy, darling, have you been a good boy for mummy today?" She cooed, rubbing her nose against his soft cheek.

"Me goo'boy! Love aunty my'nee!" He shouted. His hair promptly turned brown and curly.

She smiled at him and gently set him down. "I love you too, sweetheart."

He beamed at her and ran back to the couch, picking up where he left off in his furniture feast. She shook her head ruefully, and turned to sit in the armchair across from Tonks.

The pink haired woman chuckled. "He's a handful of raw, boundless energy, and its bloody tiring, but I wouldn't change either of my boys for the world." She smiled dreamily, thinking of her family.

Hermione smiled. "You do have the two best boys in the world; Tonks- Teddy and Remus are quite the combination."

Tonks grinned saucily. "Don't I know it!"

Hermione cleared her throat. "Listen, Tonks, I was thinking, I think we ought to reschedule the dinner tonight, but, well, if it's alright with you, I'd love to have dinner with you and Remus here tonight? See, Harry, Ron and Ginny can't make it so I was thinking that there's no need to plan something quite so big."

Tonks blinked. "Mione, you know you're always welcome here anytime, but, well, it's your 21st birthday. Don't you think that deserves some sort of celebration?" Her eyes narrowed. "And what do you mean Harry, Ron and Ginny can't make it?"

Hermione shifted on her chair. "Well, I have some news that I'd like to share with you, Remus and Sirius. It's, well, it's complicated. Just...please? Will you please do this for me?"

Tonks looked at her, brow furrowed in thought. "Ok, love, we'll do it your way. Of course we can have dinner here. But I insist that you let me organise a cake- no arguments! 21 is a big day."

Hermione smiled crookedly at her. "As long as you don't bake it, I'm sure it'll be fine..."

"No, don't worry, there's this owl order bakery...hey! I resent that!" Tonks' hurt look was somewhat spoiled by the smile twitching at the corners of her mouth. A great cook, she was not, and both she and Remus - and everyone else, for that matter- knew it. She and Remus took turns making dinner and, as far Hermione knew, most people tried to visit on a Remus cooking night. It was generally...safer that way.

"Look, I'll owl Remus and you can floo Sirius from here. Oooooh, I know just what to do for dinner!" Tonks bounced out of the room excitedly to catch the family owl, Delilah. True to her name, she was a very beautiful owl with silvery white feathers and a single black mark above her beak. She was flawless, lovely and extremely temperamental.

Hermione shook her head as she heard Tonks pleading with Delilah to take the note to Remus. The bird must have eventually complied because the attempts to bribe her with chocolate seemed to have stopped.

She giggled suddenly. _Even Remus' owl is crazy about chocolate, _she thought.

She reached for her wand and with a quick _incendio_ the fire was crackling merrily in the hearth. She grabbed the small floo jar and tossed a pinch of the green powder into the fire, shouting "Sirius Black's office, Ministry of Magic" before kneeling and sticking her head into the fire. The world seemed to twist and turn before she found herself looking into Sirius' office, where he sat scribbling away at something at his desk.

She cleared her throat, hoping to catch his attention. He looked up immediately, glancing first at the door, then at the fireplace, grinning broadly when he saw Hermione's head in the fireplace.

"Mione, love! To do what do I owe this very pleasurable opportunity?" He winked at her as he got up and walked to the fireplace, kneeling before her.

"Oh shush, Mr-I-have-a-girlfriend!"

"It's true," he sighed. "Alas, I am spoken for. Were I single, however..."

"You'd date a different girl every night and forget me entirely." She bantered.

He gasped and clutched his chest, as if injured. "I? Forget my Mione? You wound me, Madam!"

"Alright, you great buffoon, be serious for a moment- and DON'T YOU DARE spout any nonsense about always being 'Sirius'!"

He pouted at having his favourite joke denied him. "Fine, fine if you want to take all the fun out of life..."

Hermione frowned. He had unintentionally reminded her of just why she was making the biggest change of her life. Boring, brainy Hermione was no fun. Her friends had left her..._None of that. _She shook herself slightly and glanced at Sirius. He was frowning at her, puzzled.

"Love?" He asked. "You alright? Did I say something wrong? I didn't mean it like that..."

She smiled at the handsome man kneeling before her. "No Sirius, it's alright, I just remembered something I had to do later," she invented quickly.

He frowned once more - dammit, he knew her too well-, but let it go. "So what did you need to tell me?"

"Oh it's just about tonight. I decided I'd rather just have a little dinner at Remus and Tonks' place instead of going out tonight. Tonks is expecting everyone anytime from seven onwards, I think."

He frowned again, and really looked at her, his steel grey eyes boring into hers. He couldn't quite put his finger on it, but something was wrong. He frowned worriedly, feeling very protective towards the girl who had stayed with him through countless nightmares and nursed him back to health on his return from the Veil. _Something is definitely not right_, he thought.

He recollected himself and smiled gently at the lovely young woman waiting patiently in front of him.

"I thought since it was your birthday, we were going out?"

"Well, yes, but as a few people can't make it, I thought it might be nice to have something a little smaller. Please say you'll come?" She asked anxiously.

"Of course I'll be there, love. I'll see you at seven." He smiled as her head disappeared from the fireplace.

Hermione stood up and stretched, dusting off the loose floo powder and picking up Teddy as she walked into the kitchen, where Tonks was making them a cup of tea. "Sirius said he'll be here about seven."

"Great!" Tonks muttered distractedly. She continued muttering to herself and poking at the kettle with her wand, waiting for the water to boil.

Hermione smiled to herself as she deposited Teddy in a chair at the table and walked back down the hallway, calling out to Tonks, "Don't worry about tea for me. I'm going home to get ready. I'll see you about seven!"

"Righto, Mione!" She heard back, before an almighty crash resounded down the hall, followed by a string of curses and muttering. Hermione chuckled to herself and apparated home.

Sirius remained kneeling on the floor as he wondered why on earth she wanted to cancel her 21st birthday dinner. Heck, as far as he was concerned, she should have been having the biggest party imaginable, dressed to the nines and looking absolutely gorgeous, having the time of her life. Come to think of it, Harry and the others should really have planned the whole thing as a surprise party. Ah, maybe that was what was behind the change of plan? He ought to floo Harry just to make sure.

Five minutes later, a worried Sirius sat behind his desk, thinking. No one had answered the floo at Harry's or Ron's houses. Or Ginny's flat. He had flooed WWW only to have Percy tell him that George had gone on holiday to France with 'the others'. Something was not right here and he needed to talk to Remus.

Just as he grabbed a quill to scribble a quick note, there was a knock on his office door. "Come!" he called. Remus strolled in, deep in thought. _Speak of the devil..._

"Padfoot, did you get an owl about Hermione's birthday tonight?"

"Actually, Mione flooed me just now. She told me it's only dinner at yours, now. I tried to floo Harry, Ron, George and Ginny, and all I got was Percy telling me George was in France with 'the others'. What the bloody hell is going on Moony?"

Remus frown deepened and he pulled a scrap of parchment from his pocket, handing it to Sirius.

_Remus love,_

_Mione is here and asked if she could have her birthday dinner here with us and Sirius. Apparently Harry and the others 'can't make it tonight'. What the bloody hell is going on? Can you ask Sirius if he knows anything? Mione is here now and I don't want to say anything in front of her, she's probably upset enough. Of course, I told her she could have the party here._

_I'm a bit worried, love._

_ Dora xx_

Sirius frowned. "Harry and the others can't make it? What? Are they in France too? What the hell is going on here? They wouldn't miss her birthday, would they?" Both he and Remus had become increasingly concerned about Harry and the rest, and the way they seemed to be neglecting Hermione. She was lonelier and drawing more into herself every time he saw her. Oh, she still talked and laughed, but there were barriers now. She was slowly pushing everyone out. _But surely, Harry and the others wouldn't go this far_, he thought to himself. _They just wouldn't... Would they?_

Remus shook his head, jerking Sirius out of his thoughts. "I don't understand either, but it looks like we'll have to wait until we get home and ask Mione. I have a bad feeling about this."

Sirius nodded at his brother in all but blood. "You and me both, Moony, you and me both."


	3. Chapter 3: Time to Tell

**Disclaimer: Only the plot is mine. All else belongs to JK Rowling.**

_A/N: Wow, thanks everyone for the reviews. I'm so glad you are enjoying the story! Here's the next instalment. Please, please keep reviewing!_

Hermione stared at the three dresses suspended in mid air in front of her. The first was a one shouldered, midnight blue floor length silk gown. It was beautiful, the kind of dress she had always imagined she would wear to her twenty-first birthday party. She sighed. It was just too much for a dinner at home...For that matter, it would have been too much for the Three Broomsticks, too. This was the kind of dress one wore to a big party, with lots of friends and champagne, beautiful decorations and a lot of self confidence. She shook her head and levitated the dress back into her wardrobe. She wasn't having a big party- there would be a very few people there tonight, all of whom would all be dressed very casually. Whilst there may or may not be champagne, it was not the big party every girl dreamed of and she definitely did not have the confidence to wear that dress. She had bought it six months ago, having fallen in love with it as soon as she saw it. However, she doubted she'd ever have the nerve or figure to wear it. She was 'too curvy'.

She looked at the remaining two- one a pale blue, knee length linen dress with a matching jacket and heels, and the other, a long, cotton sundress in a lovely azure blue. Looking back and forth between them, she sighed again and returned the pale blue dress and jacket to her wardrobe. She had originally planned on wearing them to the Broomsticks tonight, but it was just too much for a stay at home dinner. Therefore, the sundress it was. It would work well enough with a white cardigan and white sandals with a low wedge heel.

She turned and headed into the ensuite, stripping as she went. She stepped into the shower and switched on the taps, sighing in pleasure as the hot water cascaded soothingly down her body. As she squeezed the shower gel onto her loofah, she began to consider what she would have to do to prepare for tomorrow's move to Rome. It was at times like this that Hermione was very grateful to be a witch. All she had to do was shrink her furniture and other belongings, pop them into her handbag and resize them when she arrived at her new apartment. It would take her a mere half hour to shrink the contents of her entire flat and 'pack'. She shuddered, thinking how long it would take her to pack the muggle way.

After rinsing off and turning off the water, Hermione wrapped herself in a fluffy yellow towel after casting a brief drying charm. Stepping back into her room, she chose a simple white lace strapless bra and matching panties and stepped into them. Casting a deodorising charm (much more convenient than getting white marks on her clothes from muggle deodorant), she slipped on the blue sundress and white cardigan, then cast a brief drying charm on her hair, causing it to hang to the middle of her back in natural, loose curls.

_No need for makeup, _she thought as she stepped into the simple white sandals. She applied a clear lip-gloss, added a few dabs of her favourite _Mademoiselle _by _Chanel_ on each pulse point, grabbed her white handbag and her wand and apparated back to the Lupins' home.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIONE!" was the first thing she heard as she arrived in the living room of the Lupin home.

"Thank you so much- OH!" she gasped. The living room was completely covered in blue and silver decorations. Blue and silver balloons, streamers, the _furniture_ had been turned varying shades of blue and silver. Even the guests' clothing was in keeping with the colour scheme.

"Why did you, I mean, you really didn't have to-" she stuttered, only to be interrupted by a now silver haired Tonks, clad in a silver Lycra skirt and singlet top, silver flat sandals, and carrying a silver jump-suited Teddy sporting blue hair.

"Rubbish! It's your 21st birthday, which means you have to do exactly as I say! And I say, you must have a proper party! Therefore, a party you shall have."

"Hear, hear!" cried a blue Sirius. His hair was blue, as was his skin and he was wearing a silver jumpsuit with 'Team Mione' flashing in blue fiery scrawl on the back. Hermione took one look at him and burst out laughing.

"Sirius, what on earth are you _wearing?_"

He grinned. Good grief, even his _teeth_ were blue. "Don't you know? It's Mione appreciation day, and Mione loves blue and silver. Therefore, I am dressed to please!"

A navy shirt and blue jean clad Remus muttered, "Yeah, dressed to please a bloody blind drag queen."

"OY! I'll have you know that my manly physique looks dead sexy in anything I choose to wear! No one can say no to the Super Sexy Sirius Black! Just ask Lira!"

Remus grinned and innocently asked, "And just where is she tonight, Padfoot?"

Sirius scowled at him and haughtily replied, "Well she had to work late tonight, Moony. As if she could stay away from me otherwise!" Remus snorted and Sirius very kindly showed him his middle finger.

He pointed his wand at himself and 'de-blued', his clothing transfigured into a figure hugging royal blue T- Shirt and a pair of fitted blue jeans, which, Hermione noted, managed to showcase one heck of an arse. _Bad Hermione! _She thought. No perving. Although she thought any red-blooded woman would find it difficult to keep her thoughts entirely in line around Sirius. He was what her grandmother would have called 'devilishly handsome'- chiselled, masculine features, steel grey eyes that seemed to pierce her very soul framed by long black lashes, topped with shoulder length black wavy hair, and a 6"2 muscled and toned body that any man would kill to have. To add to the sheer perfection that was Sirius, time did not seem to exist in the Veil. Therefore, whilst everyone else had aged five years, he had not and was now a VERY well preserved 35 years old.

Remus was no slouch either, she noted. Almost as tall as Sirius, with tousled, sandy hair, blue eyes that turned amber when the wolf came out to play, and a broad, muscled frame. He did not look his 40 years at all. Tonks was a very lucky lady.

But then, Remus was pretty lucky himself. Tonks was a petite, slender witch with a heart shaped face, silky straight hair which she ordinarily wore in a short pink bob, with the ability to change her looks to suit her mood. However, she maintained her natural look because Remus claimed she was perfect just the way she was. The pink hair was merely Tonks ' expression of her insatiable need to 'personalise' her looks.

Teddy was a beautiful little boy whose metamorphagus abilities caused his features to be in a constant state of flux, depending on who or what he happened to be looking at. Hermione remembered the time they had all been shopping in Diagon Alley and he had run off into a crowd of children. It had taken over an hour to find him because he had completely changed his features, hair and even his height to match the boy next to him.

Why was she paying so much attention to everyone's appearance tonight? It wasn't as if she was never going to see them again! Nonetheless, she could not help casting lingering glances at all four of these very special people. They were, very nearly, all she had left.

She cleared her mind and noticed that Sirius was talking to her.

"...called in at the last minute and couldn't get out of it, she sends her apologies though and wishes you a very happy birthday."

Ah. Lira.

Sirius' girlfriend was a specialist healer at St Mungo's, and was often called into work at all hours of the day and night. A petite, thirty year old curvy blond with stunning pale green eyes, Lira was a knockout. Apparently she had been called into work tonight. That didn't bother Hermione, as Lira didn't really have a lot of time for Hermione. She wasn't rude to her, exactly, she just didn't seem to have a lot to say to her. However, Hermione was grateful that Lira wasn't the jealous type and didn't mind Sirius catching up with Hermione on his own. Although, Hermione scoffed to herself, there wasn't really much to be jealous of, was there? A girl with barely manageable hair, too wide hips, overly large breasts and a plain face. Hardly what anyone would call competition.

Hermione pulled her attention back to Sirius.

"It's OK, Sirius, I understand. Thank her for me." _Why worry about Sirius' girlfriend not turning up when my so-called best friends didn't even remember my birthday, let alone turn up_, she thought.

_Enough of that_, she scolded herself. _They are not a part of my life anymore._

Tonks led her to the now bright blue couch and patted the cushion. "Sit down, love and I'll get you a drink. Butterbeer?"

Hermione nodded, watching Tonks summon the drink with a quick _'accio_' and murmured her thanks as she took the can.

As she sipped her favourite beverage, she casually chatted with Remus about his day. She knew the time had come to share her news when Remus casually asked her, "What time are the others coming? I'm surprised Harry isn't here yet, he's always the first to arrive." Hermione looked briefly down at her clasped hands and then up to find Remus, Tonks and Sirius looking expectantly at her.

Hermione gathered her courage and quietly said, "They aren't coming."

Remus took her hands in his large ones and gently rubbed them. "Why is that, Mione? Why would they miss your birthday?"

Hermione barked a bitter laugh. "They probably didn't know it was my birthday."

Remus was visibly surprised. "How could they not know? We _all_ knew and were planning to go to the Three Broomsticks tonight." He frowned. "What happened, Hermione?"

She gently shook her hands free from his, and stood up. She apparated to her study, took the note she had received yesterday from the wastepaper basket and popped back to the Lupins' living room. The room was silent as she walked over and handed the note to Remus. Tonks and Sirius crowded round, wanting to see what was written on the parchment.

Remus finished reading it and frowned. Tonks looked up, eyes wide with shock. Sirius, however, looked furious, and sliding off the couch, walked over to her. "This still doesn't explain how they didn't know it was your birthday, love." He said gently, caressing her cheek gently despite his obvious anger.

She smiled bitterly. "Easy. They didn't know because I didn't tell them."

Remus raised an eyebrow. "But surely they know your birthday without your telling them? You've been friends for ten years, Hermione. How could they not know your birthday?"

Hermione walked to the window, looking out at the moonlit night. She didn't answer.

She heard someone move next to her, and felt a warm hand on her shoulder. She could faintly smell _Z_, by _Zegna_. _Sirius_.

"Mione, love?"

She didn't turn, and continued looking out the window.

"Mione?"

Continuing to stare outside, she chose her words carefully. She didn't want to lie to them, but some things she simply could not tell them. Hermione never made the same mistake twice and she was not letting _anyone_ close enough to see her weaknesses ever again. She had learned her lesson- don't let anyone too close and you won't get hurt.

"Harry, Ron, Ginny and I are not as close as we once were. The truth is, it's been coming on for a long time and I just didn't want to admit it. They were my first friends and I suppose my sentimental side just didn't want to let go of that. We've drifted further and further apart over the last year, and this...incident... just caps it all off. We've all grown up and life has taken us in different directions."

_All true, _she thought_, but certainly not the whole story. I just couldn't bear to tell them. Then they'd see me for the pathetic fool I really I am and probably leave me too. Who wants a useless wreck around? I don't think I couldn't stand losing the few people I have left._

The room was silent for a few minutes after she finished, as they each processed what she had said. The hand on her shoulder disappeared only to be replaced by a pair of arms, gently turning her round, causing her to look straight into a pair of steel grey eyes.

"What do you mean, different directions, Mione?"

_Here we go, the hard part, _she sighed mentally. _If I can convince them now then they'll stop pushing. If not, they won't rest until they know. And they __can't__ know, they just can't!_

"I mean that they are all extremely public figures, who lead glamorous public lives. Harry is the boy who lived, the vanquisher of Voldemort, gorgeous and an auror to boot. Add the lovely Ginny, his stunningly beautiful fashion editor girlfriend who fought beside him in the Battle of Hogwarts, and he's even more popular. A golden couple if ever there was one. Ron is the hero's best friend, who fought nobly beside him and now has a dream job as keeper for a national Quiddich team. He's young, handsome, rich and single. He has to beat the girls off with a stick, and, judging from the tabloid pictures, he's not beating them off very hard. Their lives revolve around glamorous parties, public functions and the press."

She took a deep breath before ploughing on. "I, on the other hand, live a quiet life with a few friends and my beloved books. I work as an Unspeakable, hardly a glamorous occupation, and the most exciting thing that has happened in my life recently is getting an offer to work for a year with the Italian Ministry of Magic. It's almost the polar opposite of their lifestyle!"

She gently pushed at Sirius' arms until he let go of her shoulders, enabling her to shuffle back to the wall and lean back on it.

Remus frowned, shifting in his seat on the sofa. "But Mione, by the same token, you should be a part of that glamorous public life. You are after all, Hermione Granger, brains of the golden trio, brightest witch of your age, war hero and best friend of Harry Potter who never once left his side in all the time you've known him. Add to that you are a lovely young woman, single and working in a very mysterious occupation and I'm left wondering why you claim your lives are so different. By rights, the public should be beating down your door!"

Hermione laughed bitterly. "Dumpy bookworms who've been left behind by their famous friends don't interest the public, Remus."

She held up a hand as he opened his mouth to protest.

"Please don't think I want to be in the media or gawked at by the public, because I don't. I'm merely pointing out that we don't fit into each other's lifestyles. Let's face facts. I am not a gorgeous, glamorous person whose photo on the front page would be enough to sell an entire edition of the paper. I don't belong in that kind of life. At the same time, Harry and the others have made it very clear, in deed, if not in word, that they are no longer happy living the quiet, anonymous life I lead. I have not seen them in six months and I have hardly heard two words from them in all that time. Furthermore, I was the one who had to initiate that contact. They were simply too busy with their parties and press conferences to give me a second thought. The proof of that is in your hand- they didn't even remember that it was my birthday, let alone my twenty-first. They didn't even ask me to go with them on holiday! Hell, they _still _haven't even bothered asking about my parents and it's been three years! I think it's time to face facts. We've drifted apart and I'm just another face to them now, like so many others."

There was a shocked silence in the room, and a strange mix of reactions from the each of the people present.

Teddy, seeing that his 'Aunty Mynee' was distressed but having no clue as to why, had jumped off the couch and waddled over. He was currently cuddling her leg while she ran her fingers through his soft hair.

Remus was furious. He knew, better perhaps than the other two, a little of the horrors Hermione had faced during that blasted hunt for the horcruxes. He remembered when he had happened upon them, first at Grimmauld place, at the beginning of their hunt, and much later at Shell Cottage, when he had gone to tell them of Teddy's birth. He had been so elated that he had not immediately processed what it was he had seen. Later on, when the adrenalin rush had worn off and he was settled with Dora and Teddy, snug in their home, he had begun to piece it all together. Hermione had been extremely pale, and would suddenly twitch violently, various limbs spasming without warning. Fleur had been on hand to administer a potion each time- he suspected it was a pain relief potion for the effects of the _cruciatus_. No other curse could produce those same effects. He had noticed a long, thin cut on her neck, as though from the edge of a very sharp knife. And he had seen the large bandage wrapped on her arm, and smelled the blood underneath- the wound was fresh. Later, after the war, he had confronted her about it. She had tried to deny it, but he had pressed her and she had eventually told him of how Bellatrix had tortured her into unconsciousness. She had shown him her arm, the word 'Mudblood' cut harshly into her smooth skin with a cursed knife. It had stopped bleeding, but would never heal- she concealed the scars to this very day with a glamour. She had sworn him to secrecy- not even Tonks or Sirius knew and Hermione had never spoken of or acknowledged the matter again. Oh, but Harry and Ron, he growled to himself, _they _knew. They _knew, _dammit! They were there! They had heard her screams!

He could still feel the rage he had felt on seeing those cuts- he had been so angry it had taken him four hours of agonized screaming and sobbing, alone in an open field, before he was calm enough to go home. This girl was pack, she was _family_, and to hear how she had been hurt had driven the wolf inside to distraction. Remus was sure that, had Molly Weasley not killed Bellatrix Lestrange during the war, he would have torn the crazed murderer apart with his bare hands, Azkaban or no Azkaban.

And worse still was the fact Hermione could easily have escaped all of that- she could have fled the country with her parents and lived on a tropical island somewhere, or moved to Europe or America and done anything she pleased. Instead, she had removed her parent's memories of her and sent them away. She had then chosen to go on a dangerous and horrible mission- for Harry. She had gone to support Harry, to aid him with her considerable brains, spell-work and fighting skills. He would not have survived long enough to face Voldemort had it not been for her. Hermione's list of heroics performed out of loyalty to Harry spanned the length of her years at Hogwarts, and beyond. And he suspected that what had remained untold was just as bad, if not worse. To this day, no one outside the Trio knew exactly what had happened on that hunt.

How could they just leave her after that? How could they 'phase her out', as if she were a passing fad? What she had done, what she had given up for them could never be repaid. What made it even worse was that he could smell the hurt, anger and _fear_ coming off the young woman against the wall.

_When those three get back from their little holiday, they won't know what hit them! I'll teach them what it is to betray loyalty, to forget family! , _he growled to himself. He was so enraged, he didn't notice the low growl emanating from his chest until Dora placed her hand on his and he took a deep breath, calming himself.

Tonks was also livid. She knew Hermione had not told them everything, and she suspected that she would be even more furious once she found out the finer details. She was especially angry because she could see that Hermione was not as cool and collected as she appeared on the surface. Tonks knew that she was hiding the pain so as not to show anyone she was hurting. By rights, Hermione should be hurt, angry or at least upset. But she simply brushed it off as though it were a minor inconvenience, one of life's lessons learned. But it was much more than that.

Tonks knew what it was like to want to be valued and needed for yourself, not what you could do for people. Reading between the lines of what Hermione had said, the pink haired woman knew that Hermione doubted own her importance and worth to the point where she thought her presence or absence from her friends' lives would make no difference. Tonks also knew that kind of self-dismissal and doubt did not come all on its own. It had to be fostered and encouraged by others, whether directly or indirectly. Those three Hermione had considered her best friends for ten years bore a large share of responsibility for that. If they had valued and treated Hermione as they should, she would never have been able to doubt her own worth or her importance to her friends.

As Hermione was an incredibly private person, Tonks knew only bits and pieces of Hermione's history-things like the major crises that seemed to crop up every year at school, in which she usually wound up rescuing somebody in some way or other. Tonks shuddered to remember Hermione almost being killed in the Department of Mysteries in her fifth year. She also knew had hunted for the Horcruxes with Harry and Ron and had seen her fighting during the Final Battle.

However, what she had seen and heard from others was more than enough to show her that Hermione Granger was a loyal friend, an extremely intelligent and gifted witch, and a wonderful person. Tonks had heard from Remus how Hermione had discovered he was a werewolf very early on in her third year but had not let it bother her in the slightest, nor had she treated him differently to any other teacher. She had helped rescue Sirius, at great risk to herself, only hours after learning he was innocent. She defended the house elves, she defended the outcasts- Hermione Granger had a heart of gold. She, of all people, should never doubt her self worth.

On top of that, a few comments here and there had cause Tonks to notice that Hermione was ashamed of her physical appearance- where else would that 'dumpy bookworm' comment come from? Why had her so-called friends, over the _ten years_ of their acquaintance never helped her to see how beautiful she was? However, Tonks was fairly certain a lot of Hermione's insecurity about her appearance was the result of the work, whether unknowingly or not, of one Ginny Weasley and her esteemed brother, Ronald. She had heard the comments they made to Hermione 'in good fun'. Oh, they weren't insults or derogatory comments per se, they were just...assumptions. As if it were a given that Hermione was 'a plain Jane'. To Tonks' mind, that was worse because (and she'd bet her favourite Dior shoes on this) Hermione wouldn't even notice or question it. Attacks, people responded to. But subliminal, subtle messages? She'd bet that Hermione just took as them confirmation of her own ideas on her appearance. And whilst Harry had not cast any slurs on Hermione's appearance (as far as she knew) , Tonks doubted he had stood up for her either, or contradicted the other two. That made him just as bad, in her book.

_If I get my hands on ANY of those three gits, I'm going to hex them until they turn blue! How could they do this to her? _Tonks silently raged. Only her husband's hand gripping hers- he could always smell her anger- helped her to keep her outward composure. The last thing Hermione needed was someone going off their head and making her feel worse.

Tonks suddenly wondered how Sirius was taking it- she knew how fond he was of Hermione. She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye, and winced. His face was entirely blank- with Sirius that was worse than rage. He was beyond furious.

Sirius stood stock still, staring at Hermione. Whilst his face was devoid of any emotion or expression, his mind was anything but. His whole being was a seething maelstrom of emotions and thoughts so intense, he thought might explode. He felt rage. He felt pain. He felt sadness, and even a little guilt. He felt disbelief. But most of all, he felt a deep affection, and admiration for this woman.

Seven years ago, a fourteen year old girl stood up to a supposed mass murderer and blocked her best friend with her body, wand out, prepared to die to defend him. Not two hours later, that same girl illegally used a time turner to go back in time at great risk to herself and her best friend, to save that same man from a fate worse than death- The Dementor's Kiss. The two had faced dementors in numbers uncounted, and a werewolf during the full moon. The girl, whom he had later learned was terrified of flying, had then ridden on the back of a Hippogriff, the creature itself unjustly condemned to die, in order to save that man. She had saved him because he was innocent. Hell, she had saved the hippogriff because it was innocent, and she would not sit idly by whilst the innocent were executed. But most of all, she had saved him for her best friend.

Sirius had never once forgotten what he owed that girl. She had risked so much- for Harry. So Harry would have his godfather. And for Sirius himself- so he could live again. She had given him those precious two years with Harry. Perhaps he could not have Harry to live with him, but he had able to be there when Harry needed him. He had been able to see his godson, to talk to him, be part of his life and Hermione had helped to give him that. But she had done so much more...

_Hermione_ had stood by Harry during that thrice cursed tournament, when everyone else, including Ron, had abandoned him. _Hermione_ had taught Harry the summoning charm for hours at a time until he mastered it. _Hermione_ had ducked into the tent to comfort him before the first event. _Hermione_ was there when he came back from the graveyard, torn from witnessing the murder of Cedric Diggory. _Hermione_ was anxiously awaiting Harry at Grimmauld Place that summer, furious with Dumbledore's no communication rule. In fact, Molly Weasley had caught her trying to sneak letters to Harry more than once, and taken them. _Hermione_ had reported Umbridge's torture to McGonagall. _Hermione_, he later learned, had tried to stop Harry from going to the Department of Mysteries, suspecting a trap. _Hermione_ had gone with him anyway, once more mastering her fear of flying and riding, on a bloody invisible thestral, no less, to the Ministry, and _Hermione_ had fought alongside Harry as long as she could, slowing down the death eaters until she had been cursed so badly she had almost died.

_Hermione_ had stuck by Harry, despite her misgivings about the potions book he used. _Hermione_ had fought alongside Ron and the Order to defend the school during the Death Eater attack. _Hermione_ had dropped out of Hogwarts to follow Harry and Ron around the country looking for horcruxes. To this day, he knew next to nothing about what they had encountered apart from the final battle. _Hermione_ had erased herself from her parent's existence and sent them away, only to lose them in the end.

Sirius' gut clenched. _Hermione_ had been the one to take him to St Mungo's after he returned from the Veil, and _Hermione_ had been the one to stay at Grimmauld, nursing him back to health for months. Oh Harry had been there too, but _she _was the one had taken a two month absence from work and cared for him. _Hermione_ had been the one to sleep in a chair by his bed at night for the first three months to sooth his nightmares. She had ignored those final months before he fell into the Veil, when he had been so childish in his treatment of her, quarrelling about nothing, sulking and barely talking to anyone. She had held him when he woke, shivering, gasping or in tears, and never said a word about it, soothing his wounded pride.

And that was saying nothing of her helping Ron and Ginny, George, and who knew who else. On top of that, he suspected Ron would have failed Hogwarts if it hadn't been for her.

She had given so much...and _this _was how they repaid her?

He was furious that, despite everything she had done for Harry, for Ron, for Ginny and even for Sirius himself, she had apparently been left behind like so much excess baggage. He could not _believe_ that three years after the fact, not one of them had even bothered to ask about her parents. Not one! How could they, how could _Harry_ be so callous?

He was heartbroken at the hurt that she must be feeling. What really killed him, though, was the expression in her eyes- they were numb, guarded. _She is hiding from me, from us,_ he thought. This once warm, open, loving woman was erecting barriers. She was afraid of being hurt, and she wasn't letting anyone in. That hurt him deeply. His Mione, _their_ Mione was trying to hide some of what made her so special because she didn't want to be hurt anymore. He knew she was hiding a lot more than she let on- she had barely given them the barebones of the story. He also knew that she had no intention of sharing it, that she intended to carry it alone.

He was sad and disappointed that Harry, his Harry, James' boy, had forgotten everything this woman had done for him, forgotten the loyalty she had given him and the loyalty he owed her, for glamour and shallow praise. He also felt a little guilty by association. Harry was his godson and he had done this, he had forgotten Hermione. If only Sirius had pushed harder to find out why he never saw Harry and the rest with Hermione anymore, if only he had done something...

He sighed. No, this was something Harry, Ron and Ginny had done and it was something _they_ had to fix. There was nothing he, Remus or anyone else could do. No matter how hard he wished he could.

_When those three get home, they will sit down and they WILL listen to me_, he growled to himself. _They caused this damage they and will hear just what it is they have done, and had better bloody well hope it isn't too late to undo it. She doesn't deserve this! If anything, they don't deserve her friendship!_

He looked at her, seeing how rigidly she held herself. He knew, on some level, that she must be worried about their reactions. However much he wanted to rant and swear, he controlled himself for her sake.

"They're lucky I don't know where exactly on the Riviera they are right now." He said quietly. "Believe me when I say that when they return, they will be made to regretit, all of it."

Hermione flinched. For Sirius to speak like that, it meant that the person causing his ire had better run. Immediately. Hell, even, Remus, furious as he looked, was worried now. She didn't want to cause this kind of trouble. She knew she had to speak up, hard as it may be after telling her tale.

"Sirius, I appreciate that you want to help but please- don't. Not on my behalf." She whispered.

He looked at her. "Mione, what they've done is _wrong,_ irrespective. That they did it to _you_ makes it far worse. Something has to be done. If nothing else, Harry is my godson. For his own sake, if not for yours, then please, let me address it."

She shook her head, looking at the floor. "No. Please, it doesn't matter anymore. Just...let it go. Please."

Remus growled, whilst Tonks stared at her. "Are you bloody serious? How can we look at them the same way, talk to them as if nothing has happened when they've peeled you off like a damn banana skin?"

Hermione was undeterred. "It doesn't matter anymore. By the time they come back, it will make no difference at all whether or not they realise what they've done."

Sirius frowned, wondering what she meant. Suddenly, something she had earlier said struck him.

_"The most exciting thing that has happened in my life recently is getting an offer to work for a year with the Italian Ministry of Magic!"_

He had a sinking feeling in his gut because suddenly, he _knew. _He knew what her news was and his face showed his sorrow.

"You're leaving." It wasn't a question but a statement, spoken in his silky baritone.

She closed her eyes briefly against the pain in his eyes, then opened them, looking at Teddy, who had sat on the floor at her feet, playing with his shoes.

"Yes."

That one word drew gasps from Tonks and Remus. "What do you mean you're leaving? Tonks demanded.

"I've decided to accept the one year placement in Rome."

"Rome?" Remus gaped. "But, but... your life is here!"

Hermione smiled bitterly. "That's what I used to think. Yesterday, I learned otherwise. Yesterday, I learned my life is where I put it, and the people in my life are the ones who want to be in it."

She softened her tone. "I still want you, all of you, in my life. I'm not leaving _you._ Rather, I'm giving myself a new start in life, with no bitter memories, no false hopes and quite frankly, no expectations. Look around. What do I have left here? My parents are gone. Harry, Ron and Ginny are gone. George doesn't seem to need me anymore, although I am willing to hear him out before I make any decisions regarding our friendship. Everywhere I turn there are reminders of the War and what it took from us. I've been offered one year in a place I've always wanted to go, with a lovely apartment, a good income and the ability to create international port-keys on demand, and an international floo connection in my own home. I ask you again, what do I have to stay for?"

Remus smiled sadly. "You have us."

She turned to look at Sirius, Tonks, Remus in turn. "Yes, I have you and that means everything to me. You are all I have left! But there is nothing left for me in this place. I have lost too much here, sacrificed too much and I cannot stay. I have been offered the opportunity for a fresh start and tomorrow at 2pm, I will take a portkey to Rome. On arrival, I intend to create three reusable international portkeys. I hope to give you two of these portkeys so that you will visit me often. They will take you directly to my apartment. I will use the third to come to England to continue our fortnightly dinners. I will also send you my floo details as soon as I arrive."

She paused for breath. She looked Sirius in the eye. "Will you...accept the portkey?"

He smiled sadly. "Do you even need to ask, love? Of course I will."

If anyone understood the need for a fresh start and escaping bad memories, he did. He would never begrudge her that. He just wished it hadn't had to come to this. She, along with Remus, had become his best friend, and the idea of her being so far away hurt. He cleared his throat, and drew her back into his arms. "I am...truly honoured that you would trust me in such a way, and that you want me in your life so much."

She kissed his cheek softly and drew back. "How could I not want the super sexy Sirius Black in my life?" she smirked.

He gave her a heart stopping grin and winked. "Finally, someone gets it!"

It never ceased to amaze her how he could hide such a caring, sensitive nature with his fun-loving, cheeky Marauder persona, and how easily he could switch between the two.

She took a deep breath and turned to face Remus and Tonks. "And you? Will you accept the portkey?"

Remus smiled gently as Tonks snorted. His quiet "Of course" was drowned out by her indignant "Damn right we do!"

Hermione was so grateful that they did not try and change her mind or beg her to stay. They understood and willingly accepted the means remain in close contact and continue their relationship.

Remus looked at her then. "What are we to tell them?" There was no need to say who he meant.

Hermione sighed. Much as she would like to vanish without a trace, she knew it would be stupid.

"Just...tell them I took a job overseas. And that I have forbidden you to tell them where."

Remus cocked an eyebrow. "And if they want to know why, may we then tell them?"

Hermione's shoulders slumped. There was nothing for it. Remus, Tonks and Sirius were determined to have it out with the three no matter what she said. Better she be able to impose conditions on it, she supposed.

She sighed again. "Very well. You may tell them what I've told you, and that I do not want them to know where I am. You may even tell them that I don't want to hear from them even if they are so inclined. However. You are only to tell them if they ask where I am. Otherwise, I beg you not to tell them _anything_. I was an obligation and an afterthought during the friendship; I won't be one now that it has ended! I don't want them to feel concerned just because you told them to be. Please, promise me you won't tell them unless they ask."

The three looked at each other, sighed then nodded.

She sighed in relief. _Well, that's something, at least, _she thought.

She smiled shakily at each of her friends, her _family_, and said simply, "Thanks." A sudden tugging at her dress made her look down.

"Hungawy!" squawked an indignant Teddy. "Teddy want numnum!"

The adults chuckled, and glanced sadly at one another, before Tonks clapped her hands and said, "Right! Enough misery! We are here to party!"

Hermione smiled. "Dinner first, party later! I need sustenance!"

A loud squeal of agreement from Teddy sent them all trooping to the dining room.

_A/N: Phew! That was a tough one to write. Angelus Draco, I know what you mean the whole time I was writing it, I kept picturing Sirius' and Remus' reactions, and what they'd say to Harry and Co...That will be a fun chapter to write!_


	4. Chapter 4: Birthday Business

**Disclaimer: Er, is no mine. Well, except for the plot. Apart from that "is no mine!"**

_A/N: Hello again! Here's next instalment of my little story. This is a shorter chapter admittedly, but I feel like it's a necessary part of setting the scene for the major chapters ahead. _

_Thank you so, so much for all those who left reviews! You really are building up my confidence with your kind words. Very much appreciated. _

Dinner was a pleasant affair, with Tonks having ordered three fabulous courses from one of Hermione's favourite restaurants- Flavours of Morocco. She knew Tonks must have pulled a few strings, being the partner of the restaurant owner's auror son, because EVERYONE knew that this restaurant did not allow their fabulous food to leave the restaurant. Ever. Hermione certainly appreciated the gesture.

After they had finished the delicious meal, Tonks called for silence in her usual graceful fashion. "OY! Quiet you lot!" The chattering stopped. Gratified, she dimmed the lights with a wave of her wand. Another wave sent something floating in from the kitchen. Something that looked a lot like a chocolate cake, with chocolate icing and beautiful silver candles with her trademark bluebell flames. Hermione stared in shock. They really had gone all out.

"All together now!" Remus shouted. As one, they chorused, "Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear Mioneeeeeeee, happy birthday day to youuuuuuuuu!"

Sirius shouted "Pip, pip, hooray!"

Hermione laughed, and, after the last hooray, closed her eyes and blew out the candles in one breath.

"What did you wish for, birthday girl?" Remus asked, whilst eyeing the gooey confection of chocolate-y goodness that was her cake with undisguised longing. She smirked. The werewolf had as big a chocolate addiction as she did, and she knew it must be killing him not to be able to dig in until she had cut the cake.

"I didn't make a wish." She muttered distractedly, as she carefully flicked her wand at the cake, a neat charm cutting it into even pieces, another sending slices on small plates zooming in front of each person.

"What?" Sirius gasped. "No WISH?"

Hermione's smile faltered somewhat. "Don't believe in wishes. It's just a silly superstition." She didn't add that after years of failed wishing- wishing for friends of her own, wishing to be beautiful, wishing to become someone else- she didn't have it in her to wish anymore. Why keep hoping for things that would never happen? _Be thankful for what you have and move on, _she thought.

An awkward silence filled the room momentarily. Tonks cleared her throat. "Right, presents!"

"Not yet!" pleaded Remus. "The cake..." His comical pout broke the tension.

Everyone laughed and dug in. _Mmmmmmm_, she thought. The cake was decadent. She wanted the name of this bakery!

As she finished her slice, and was about to ask for the name of the bakery, Tonks threw her fork onto her empty plate and flicked her wand, shouting "Right! NOW it's time for presents**!**"

Suddenly, a number of packages came zooming into the room and stopped in front of Hermione.

She grabbed the large silver wrapped box directly in front of her. The card made her smile. "_To our Mione, happy birthday! Love, Remus, Tonks and Teddy_." At she tore into it, she didn't notice her friends glance at one another. Her smile did not reach her eyes, and knowing the cause of her pain did not make it any easier to see this kind-hearted woman so guarded and detached. They shook their heads and returned their attention to Hermione.

"Oh, thank you Tonks! Thank you Remus- and of course thank you my little Teddy!" She added kissing the boy, gazing at their lovely gift- beige coloured knee high leather boots with a matching coloured leather satchel. "The satchel is bottomless and has been treated with the featherlight charm", Remus added, "Useful for those of us who carry a lot of books" he smiled knowingly at her.

"It's a very thoughtful gift." She said softly. "Thank you. It's wonderful.'

Tonks winked at her. "The boots and satchel are charmed to change colour and heel size automatically to match whatever you are wearing, and the satchel can only be opened by you, can't be summoned by anyone else. Put anything in there, and only you can get it out. Also charmed so that you can immediately get out whatever you're looking for, so you don't spend hours poking around in there. Plus it has basic stabilization charms to make sure everything doesn't topple all over the place!"

Hermione smiled at the boots and satchel. "I presume I need to set the security charms by touching my wand to the clasp?"

Tonks nodded.

Hermione took her wand and touched the tip to the clasp of the satchel. There was a brief flash and she felt a slight tingle in her wand arm. "All done."

She smiled in thanks at the Lupins as she reached for the next box, It was slightly smaller, and wrapped in royal blue paper with a silver ribbon. The card read "_To my dearest Mione, on the occasion of her 21st birthday. All my love, Sirius_."

She removed the wrapping paper and sighed in pleasure. Inside was a beautiful lacquered wooden box which opened at her touch. It contained several compartments, each bearing a different treasure. There were at least ten different quills, each of which was stunning in its design and colour. There two ink pots, one in silver and the other in heavy crystal, and two crystal jars of sand for blotting. There was a large stack of very fine parchment, and, in the topmost corner of the box, a golden quill.

Hermione looked at Sirius questioningly, pointing at the golden quill. "What...?"

"That's a truth quill, love." He explained. "No matter who writes with it or what they try to write, they can only ever write the truth." Her eyes widened, thinking of the possibilities of such a thing.

Sirius smiled at her obvious excitement. "Parchment is charmed with an Untearable charm, and once something has been written on it, it can only be altered by you. Sand is charmed to refill itself, so you'll never run out. And the quills have been treated with the self-mending charm, so you'll never have to bother about that. The box locks, of course. Key is only visible to you, so if you lock, no one will be able to open it. "

Hermione beamed, and then frowned. "Then why two bottles of sand? If it's self-filling and I can always just use a drying charm anyway..."

Sirius shrugged. "One didn't seem like enough, and sand just seemed to complete the set."

Hermione rolled her eyes, and then smiled at him. "Thank you Sirius, it's just lovely. I'll enjoy writing to you all with it!"

He smiled at her. "I'm glad you like it, Mione. I saw it and it just seemed so...you." She cast her eyes down, unable to believe how thoughtful they were being.

Sensing her discomfort, he nudged her shoulder with his own and jerked his head at the remaining gifts in front of her. She nodded and reached for the next one, but paused mid-way, frowning.

"Who are the rest of these gifts from? I mean, you've already given me your gifts..."

Remus just smiled. "Why don't you open them and see?"

She scowled. "You'd better not have gotten me more than one gift, Remus Lupin! That's too much!"

Remus assumed a look of angelic innocence that had her frantically reaching for the next box. "_To my nee, love Teddy_" scrawled in crayon."

She blinked, and opened the box to find...a beautiful lacquered wooden box, about fifteen inches in length by seven in width, which suspiciously looked exactly like the box Sirius' gift resided in.

She looked up and Remus and frowned. "Remus it's lovely, but as I said, one gift is more than enough."

Remus simply smiled and said "Can I help it if Teddy has impeccable taste? You wouldn't hold it against a small boy, would you?" He glanced at said small boy and chortled. Teddy had fallen fast asleep, clutching a piece of wrapping paper.

He stood and gently swept him into his arms, then walked carefully out of the room, intending to put the boy to bed.

Hermione frowned at the box and pushed at the top. it opened with a refined 'click' to reveal a crayon drawing. Hermione smiled softly, pulling it out. It contained four stick figures, and what she presumed was meant to be a large dog. It was entitled 'our famlee.'

She blinked away the sudden tears in her eyes and replaced the drawing carefully back in the box. Tonks spoke up. "Box is bottomless, weightless, and unable to be summoned or opened by anyone except you once you set the locking charms. Good for storing important papers."

Hermione nodded stroked the box lovingly. It was beautiful and such a practical gift for an Unspeakable. Security, especially at home, was a very big concern.

Remus walked back in as she reached for the very last box, which was quite small. The card said simply, _'Wear these and think of me. Sirius_.'

She opened the silver wrapped box to find a slim black velvet jeweller's box. She opened it with suddenly trembling fingers and gasped. Inside, nestled on a sea of red velvet, was a stunning pair of diamond and sapphire drop earrings. Hermione was no expert, but she knew from the size and clarity of the stones that these had to have cost serious galleons.

She gaped up at him. "Sirius, this is far too much! They are beautiful, I... I don't think I've ever seen anything so pretty before, but it's too much, I can't accept these."

He laughed. "Well, when you put it that way... Silly girl! Don't you know that nothing is too much for you? We love you and you are worth so much to us! I know that _others_ "Here he scowled " have treated you as if you don't matter. We wanted to show you in our own little way just how much you matter to us. A few measly galleons is nothing to put a smile on your face. Pretty earrings for a pretty girl. "He suddenly grinned."Besides, you have to accept them. It's too late to take them back and they'll look bloody awful on Moony!"

Remus scowled at him whilst sneaking another piece of cake."Always has to drag me into it. Mutt thinks he's funny." he muttered.

Sirius grinned. "Can I help it if I am so utterly witty and amusing, my big, bad werewolf?"

Hermione smiled at the well-worn argument between the two friends. They all knew it just an act.

Sirius smiled back. "Anyway, got a few features added on the earrings. They work in a similar fashion to the WWW shield hats- block minor to moderate curses and hexes. They can't be summoned away from you, only you can remove them and they also act as an emergency portkey to a secure location. Activation phrase is 'coconut tango'." He shrugged at her amused look and said, 'it's something that's not likely to crop up too often in conversation and whisk you away accidentally."

She nodded consideringly, but had one last question. "Where will it take me?"

He grinned. "Black Island. Wards will let me know if you portkey there, so I'll head straight over to you if anything happens."

She beamed at his thoughtfulness, and then puckered her brow as something occurred to her.

"I feel bad, though, being the only one with an emergency portkey. Shouldn't we all have one? Just in case? I mean, I know there isn't as much danger now the war is over, but there are still rogue death eaters, and other criminals that seem to be a part of any society." she flushed. "I'm sorry, I know probably sounds silly..."

Sirius grinned. "Not silly at all love, I had the same idea right after I got you those earrings. The others will be ready tomorrow morning. That way, each of us has one."

Remus and Tonks had been whispering together. Tonks suddenly cleared her throat. "Mione, we, er, were, well, we were wondering if you wouldn't spend the morning here with us tomorrow until its time to take your portkey? I'm not working til the day after, and Remus was planning to take the day off. Sirius, are you able to take the day off?"

He nodded. "No problem. Maleson is Senior Auror on duty tomorrow anyway."

Tonks turned to Hermione, raising her left eyebrow questioningly.

Hermione hesitated. "Well, I do have to pack tomorrow..." Hearing Tonks snort at her somewhat pathetic excuse, she relented. "OK, OK, I'll come by after I've packed and reset the wards on the apartment. " She frowned. "I'll have make a few changes to the wards."

No one said anything. They all knew what she meant.

They chatted a while more, then, after sharing a champagne toast, decided to call it a night. They all agreed to meet for breakfast at 9am the following morning.

Hermione hugged everyone and thanked them once more then shrunk her gifts and put them into her handbag. With one last 'Thank you!" She apparated home.

_A/N: Just a quick note to periled potterhe, thanks so much for your lovely review. Unfortunately, there doesn't really seem to be a 'review reply' function, so if you would like to send me your username so we can PM, or an email address, I would be very happy to answer your questions on the story. :) _


	5. Chapter 5: Tango, Please!

**Disclaimer: Hear ye, hear ye. Harry Potter be not mine. Only this poor plot doth bear my name. Hear ye.**

_A/N: Hello again, lovely readers! Well, here we have the very last chapter before Hermione leaves for Rome. I hope this story isn't progressing too slowly- I myself am very excited for her to settle into her new life, but I have this niggling compulsion to 'set the scene' properly so all the little bibs and bobs make sense later in the story. Don't worry, Harry and co. have a heavy reckoning coming soon! Just a couple more chapters! I think it's more important to focus on Hermione's new life at this point._

_As always, thank you for your kind words and thoughtful reviews- please keep reviewing!_

Hermione awoke early, and checked her watch. Groaning, she pulled herself out of bed. It was barely six o'clock and she had had a very restless night. _Shower_, she thought, _and coffee. _But first, she needed the loo.

After she had finished her morning ablutions she dressed in jeans, a cotton top and flats. Feeling marginally more awake from her nice hot shower, she decided to make a cup of coffee before packing.

Yawning, she shuffled into the kitchen and, with a flick of her wand, filled and set the percolator on the stove.

Once it began to boil, she quickly poured the coffee into a cup and sent a quick _'scourgify'_ at the percolator.

Sipping her coffee, she thought over what she had to accomplish before meeting the others for breakfast. _Wards first_, she thought. Finishing her coffee and setting the cup aside, she took her wand, closed her eyes and concentrated. Waving her wand in a complex movement, she saw the wards in her mind's eye. She focused on the anti-portkey and anti-apparition wards, seeing the unique magical signatures of each person currently cleared to portkey or apparate within those wards. She could not have said how she could identify each magical signature, only that she did. She focused on those she knew to be Sirius, Remus, Tonks and Teddy, leaving them as they were. The others she imagined fading from her sight. When they had vanished completely, she bought her wand down in a hard slashing motion and uttered '_fiat'. _She then brought to mind the shield charms her defending apartment against brute force and physical break-ins. They were not impenetrable but they were reasonably effective. They were also combined with a powerful locking charm that would give anyone not keyed in to the wards a shock each time they attempted to unlock the door. She repeated the process of removing the other signatures, uttering _fiat _with the same slashing motion as she finished.

Opening her eyes, she rubbed her forehead. Working with wards was tiring at the best of times, but on little sleep and an empty stomach, it was downright exhausting. Sighing, she stood and began to save her wand at the furniture and appliances in the kitchen, shrinking them one by one. When she had finished, she summoned her black leather handbag and levitated the items into a small box and placed them inside. She then walked into the living room and repeated the process.

As she walked down the corridor to her bedroom, she pondered whether she would use the same furniture in her new apartment, or whether she would buy new things and 'store' her old belongings in a drawer somewhere. She mentally shrugged and thought, _I'll worry about that when I get there and see the apartment. The main thing is just to get it all together so I don't forget anything. _

Having completed 'packing' her bedroom, she moved onto the guest room, study, linen closet and bathroom. At last she had packed the last few items - the contents of the medicine cabinet- into her bag and walked around the house to make one final inspection.

Every room was completely devoid of furniture, each cupboard bare. It was done. She cast dust and mould repelling charms and picked up her bag, turning on the spot.

She appeared on the front stoop of the Lupin home and rang the bell. Checking her watch she saw it was a few minutes to nine. A few moments later, a t-shirt and jean clad Remus opened the door and smiled at her. " Good morning, 'Mione. Come on in, I've almost finished making breakfast."

She sniffed appreciatively as she followed him down the hall. "Mmmmmmm, I can tell! Eggs and Bacon and omelette, and crepes with... is that chocolate?" She grinned at the sheepish werewolf.

"I -"

"You don't need to convince me, Remus. I remember very well the first lesson you taught me: chocolate is the food of the gods and the elixir of life!"

He grinned. "And you've learned so very well! You always were my best pupil."

_And yet for all of my vaunted brilliance, I never managed to learn my lesson when it comes to people, _she thought, smiling mechanically at Remus as she entered the kitchen. _If I had, Harry and the rest would never have gotten close enough to hurt me. I feel so...used. As if it were only my abilities that caused them to tolerate me._

She suddenly realised that she was standing in the doorway to the kitchen, staring at the wall and Remus was waiting patiently behind her.

She blushed and walked into the kitchen. "Sorry, Remus, I was just thinking..."

He smiled warmly at her as Tonks placed a plate with a fresh chocolate crepe in front of her. "It's alright- it's a big day after all! You'd be hard pressed _not_ to be distracted.

Hermione reached for the coffee and tried to smile at Tonks and Sirius before taking a sip. She managed one beautifully, but they both noticed that, once again, it didn't reach her eyes.

Sirius smiled back at her and with a "Morning, love!" fell to the bacon and eggs in front of him. Tonks winked at her whilst picking at her cheese and mushroom omelette. Teddy, his mouth covered in chocolate, waved at her and called out 'My-nee! Eat?'

She leaned over and kissed his head. "That, my Teddy, is a wonderful idea. I think I really ought to get started on this wonderful crepe that your daddy made."

She took up the knife and fork and began to cut the gooey concoction into pieces, so focused on her task, she didn't notice Sirius give Tonks a questioning look, nor did she see Tonks and Remus shake their heads and mouth '_after breakfast_'.

She popped the first bite in her mouth and sighed. _Heaven_, she thought. Just the right amount of chocolate. She glanced over at the werewolf and chortled at the dreamy expression on his face as he demolished the crepe on his plate. He heard her and blushed, before reaching for a second crepe. She shook her head at him and finished her own crepe.

Tonks cocked her eyebrow. "Would you like an omelette? Bacon? Eggs? Another crepe? No? Bloody hell, 'Mione, you need to eat more! You'll waste away to nothing if you keep this up."

Hermione huffed, and muttered under her breath, "I should be so lucky." Aloud, she said, "I don't think we have to worry about that. Anyway, you're one to talk!"

Sirius and Remus, who had heard her muttered statement, frowned in unison. Then Sirius nudged Remus in the rubs and turned to Hermione, a smile on his face. "Ah, but our Tonks eats enough to feed the whole of Puddlemere United after the World Cup!"

Tonks glared at him. "Careful Sirius, or you might just find certain bits of your anatomy are smaller than you remember."

He paled and got the point. He shut up immediately.

Twenty minutes later, having finished breakfast, and Teddy having had his face cleaned, the party adjourned to the now restored living room. Remus and Tonks sat on the sofa with Teddy between them, and Hermione and Sirius sat on matching armchairs opposite one another.

Remus cleared his throat and, with a look at Sirius, began. "Hermione, we just want you to know that we love you very much. You mean a great deal to all of us." She smiled at him and murmured, "I do know. Thank you."

He continued. "We, the four of us, that is, are concerned with how you are taking this situation. We don't wish to intrude, however we have noticed that you seem more reserved and aren't really letting much out. Please, talk to us. Let us help you."

Hermione looked at her hands. "Remus, that's very kind of you, all of you, but the truth is there is nothing to talk about. I made the mistake of letting certain people too close to me and it would appear I misjudged both their motives and my worth in their eyes. Our lives are now headed in two very different directions. They are taking one glamerous and party-filled path whilst I am walking the book-strewn, studious path I sometimes think I was born on. I don't fit into their lifestyle and they don't care to fit into mine. It hurts, but I'm taking it as one of life's lessons and moving on."

They stared at her disbelievingly.

"Truly, it's not a big deal. I've lived through worse. It's just part of who I am and I have to live with it. Now please, don't let's ruin our day together with talk of the past. What's done is done and I've learned from my mistakes. Let's just move on."

Remus looked hard at her for a few moments, then nodded. "Alright, we'll respect that, but Hermione, if ever you need to talk, you know any and all of us are more than willing, at any time."

She nodded at him, and then cleared her throat. "To change the subject slightly, there is a favour I would ask of you, Sirius."

Sirius nodded immediately. "Of course."

She quirked her eyebrow at him. "Don't you want to know what it is first?"

He smiled. "There's no need. Anything you ask of me is yours, 'Mione. You know that."

She shifted uncomfortably. _I don't deserve that_, she thought. _He's too kind. He probably just feels sorry for me._

"Well, it's nothing too strenuous. I just, well, I have Christmas presents I had already bought for...them... and I have no use for them. More than that, I don't want them around as they will remind me of...everything, and I don't think I need that. Would you take them? You can keep them, send them or throw them away- it doesn't matter to me anymore. If you do send them though, please don't put my name on them. I know I should just throw them away myself, but I spent so much time picking them out, I just can't bear to..."

At his nod, she opened her bag and summoned the gifts. Resizing them, she handed them to Sirius, who flooed them to his home. "Thank you," she began, only to be cut off. "Love, it's nothing." He smiled. "I told you, for you, anything."

He cleared his throat. "Before I forget, I have those emergency portkeys I told you about yesterday- picked them up this morning, actually. I'll give Lira hers tomorrow." He dug into his pocket and pulled out a black jeweller's box. Opening it, he removed four gold rings. He was wearing the Black family ring, which Hermione guessed he had already turned into a portkey. He gave one to Remus, a heavy, solid gold signet ring with a Wolf imprinted on it, saying, "Don't you give me any rubbish about extravagance! I was going to use silver, but in light of the Furry Little Problem..." Remus smiled. "Say no more." Silver was deadly to werewolves.

Tonks accepted a plain gold band with thorns engraved all the way round. "Suits your thorny nature", he winked. She scowled at him as she slipped the ring onto the middle finger of her right hand.

Sirius turned to Hermione. "And to you, my 'Mione, I give this." He held out the last band. She stared at him in confusion. "But you already gave me a portkey. The earrings.."

"Yes, but I remembered you weren't likely to wear those all the time. I wanted something you could comfortably wear all the time. So I got you this."

She took the ring and stared at the engraved crisscrossing roses encircling the band. "In honour of your beauty." Sirius declared solemnly.

Hermione hid her cringe as she slipped the ring onto the third finger of her right hand. _Beauty indeed, _she thought. _What beauty? My too-wide, too round hips, the full thighs, the too-big breasts or the squishy, rounded tummy?_

Nonetheless, she tried to hide her response and thanked Sirius. He noted her expression, but said nothing. _Somebody really did a number on her,_ he thought. He resolved to himself to build up her confidence. If only she would open up to him...

He came to himself and remembered he had one more ring, this one smaller than the others. "This one is for Teddy," he said. "However, because he is so young, I added an extra charm to it that will only enable the portkey to work if he in danger. Can't have teddy vanishing all over the place, can we?" He said with a big grin to the small boy.

"They all have the same password, Coconut tango."

Despite her sombre mood, Hermione stifled a giggle at hearing the activation phrase. It sounded so silly.

Sirius cocked an eyebrow at her. "And what, pray tell, is so amusing, Miss Granger?"

She giggled aloud now, unable to hold it in. "I'm sorry, it's just every time you say that, I can't help but imagine two coconuts dancing to _La Cumparsita_."

Sirius grinned. "And why not? Coconuts are people too, and everybody has the right to a good tango now and then! In fact, I know just the pair..."

With a wave of his wand, two coconuts appeared, one of which, Hermione noted, was bright red. Another wave and _La Cumparsita_ began to play on the piano in the corner. Hermione stared, and then laughed as the two balls began to roll around in a very basic approximation of what she guessed to be the steps of the Tango.

The whole group roared with laughter as one of coconuts managed to get itself stuck in the corner, whilst the other continued to dance. Teddy laughed and clapped, shouting 'coke-nut dance!'

Sirius pretended to be affronted, whilst wiping tears of laughter from his eyes as he watched the unfortunate coconut finally manage to escape the corner, only to run smack bang into a piano leg. "Well, I never! Such an insult cannot be ignored! You lot think you can do better? I demand satisfaction for the insult offered to my coconuts!"

Remus guffawed, and Tonks smirked at Sirius' deliberately suggestive choice of words.

"I mean it! I challenge you! Tango to the death!" With that, he bounded over to the sofa. "Sirius, don't you dare..." Tonks began.

Sirius smirked. "Who said I was after you, Tonksie?" With that, he grabbed Remus' hand and pulled the protesting werewolf into the middle of the living room floor. Sirius waved his wand and shouted "From the top!" and with that, the music began once more. The coconuts lay under the piano, forgotten.

Sirius assumed the dancing position and began to drag Remus through what looked to be the most painful tango Hermione had ever seen. She smiled as Remus, obviously uncomfortable in the unfamiliar steps of the lady's tango, managed to step on Sirius' foot for the third time in under a minute.

"OW! Moony! Bloody hell, that HURTS! When I said tango to the death, I didn't mean for you to declare open season on my feet!"

Remus scowled at him. "Well, what did you expect? You're making me dance the woman's part! And in case you haven't noticed, Padfoot, I'm not a woman! I've never learned it! Why don't you let me lead and you can be the woman, since you're so talented?"

Sirius paled. "Errr...on second thought, I think you're doing just fine, Moony."

They were about to resume their painful dance when a sudden "Oh, for crying out loud! Move, Sirius!" caused them to draw apart again. Tonks stood and stomped over to them, and, muscling Sirius out of the way, assumed the dancing position. She flicked her wand and another Tango started. Hermione wasn't sure, but she thought it might have been _Blue Tango_.

She watched as Remus and Tonks seemed to glide across the floor in a measured, graceful rhythm, smiling at how well they moved together. She had to admit, Remus was a very good dancer and she therefore put his momentary ineptitude down to his being forced to follow Sirius rather than lead. Even the usually clumsy Tonks was moving well.

Thinking of Sirius, he suddenly stood before her. "Miss Granger, may I have this dance?" She started in surprise. "Oh, thank you, Sirius, but I don't know how. It's alright, I'd rather watch."

He grinned. "No trouble 'Mione, I can teach you easily enough. Come on..." He held out his hand to her.

She blushed, but remained adamant. "No, please, Sirius. I...I don't want to make a fool of myself."

He frowned, lowering his outstretched hand. "Love, I can teach you, really, I don't mind. And we're amongst friends here; you know none of us would ever laugh at you."

She looked pleadingly at him, then down at her hands, whispering, "I know, Sirius. I'm just not the type, alright? Tango isn't for people like me. Please don't make me."

It galled her to have to reveal as much, especially to him. She would much rather enjoy what she had rather than dwell on the traits she didn't have- like grace. And confidence. Poise. _And the looks to pull off a sexy red tango dress wouldn't hurt either, _she thought.

He looked at her questioningly. "People like you? Kitten, what do you mean? The Tango is for everyone to enjoy. It's a lot of fun, please, let me..." He trailed off at the look on her face. It was difficult to describe. It was almost as if she were trying to melt into the floor, to become invisible and disappear altogether. He glanced at Tonks and Moony, seeing that they were either caught up entirely in their dance, or knew he was talking to 'Mione and were trying to give him the space to do so. Knowing Moony and his hearing, it was probably a bit of both.

He perched on the arm of her chair and took her hand. "Why do you do that, love?" He asked quietly, rubbing his thumb across the back of her hand.

She didn't look up. "Do what?" She asked just as quietly. She knew perfectly well what he meant; she just couldn't bear to have this conversation with him, of all people. How could someone so confident, so handsome and self-assured, understand what it was like to be an ugly, funless, boring, little nobody?

Sirius wouldn't let up however. "This. Hide away and try to become invisible. Doubt your own beauty. Deny yourself the fun that other people take for granted." He gently took his hand from hers and placed under her chin, gently pushing until she had to look up and meet his eyes. His grey eyes stared directly into hers, as he murmured, "Why are you punishing yourself for someone else's wrong?"

She blanched as he hit dangerously close to the mark. "I don't know what you m-" She began, only to be cut off mid-sentence.

"Please don't pretend, Hermione. We've always been honest with each other- don't change that now. If you don't wish to talk about it, then I will respect that, but please, don't lie to me."

He stared directly into her eyes without blinking as he said this, an uncharacteristically serious look on his face.

She nodded shakily. He was one of the few she had left, one of the few who had stuck by her. She owed him her honesty. As for confidences...well, perhaps she could answer one of his questions and avoid those which touched on certain areas she didn't want to discuss.

She cast her eyes down and he let go of her chin, sensing her need to avoid his gaze. A quick glance at Remus and Tonks showed him they had just started what looked like a waltz. He looked back at the young woman in front of him, who was staring at her hands.

"I just don't dance, Sirius. I've never been particularly graceful. As for the other, please don't ask me to talk about it. It won't do any good."

He took her hands in his and forced himself to smile. "Alright 'Mione, I won't push you, but please know that if you change your mind and want to talk about it, I'm more than happy to listen. Anytime."

She nodded, casting him a small smile as the strains of the Viennese Waltz wafted through the room.

"I won't push you to dance, but I will say this, love. I wish you'd let me teach you the Tango because you're perfect for it. You're beautiful and graceful and passionate, and honestly, you're dead sexy. 'Mione, the Tango is for people _exactly _like you."

She couldn't mask the bitter look in her eyes as she replied. "That's very kind of you to say Sirius."

He smiled sadly. "And you don't believe a word of it, do you?"

She just looked at him. "You're a kind man," was all she said and kissed his cheek.

With that, she turned her attention back to the floor and watched as Remus and Tonks moved across the floor, ending the dance gracefully.

Hermione and Sirius applauded, Sirius wolf-whistling and cheering. Teddy laughed and clapped, whilst Sirius conjured a rose and threw it at Remus. It hit him square in the nose.

Without missing a beat, Remus threw it back at Sirius, who nimbly dodged. He smirked at Remus, who opened his mouth to retort. Before he could utter a word, however, Tonks intervened. "'Mione, why don't we take some photos so you can decorate your new place? If you want our ugly mugs cluttering up your walls, that is." She said, winking.

Hermione smiled. "I think that's a wonderful idea. Let me get my camera."

_New memories_, she thought as she walked to the chair where she had left her bag,_ for my new home. _Picking up the bag, she stuck her wand in and whispered '_Accio_ Hermione's camera." The small camera zipped out of her bag. It resembled a slim, compact muggle camera; however, this camera was equipped with certain charms (zoom charm, focus charm, timing charm and so forth) and magical film.

She resized it and walked back to the others. "I think it would be nice to take some portraits, and perhaps a few candid pictures. Come on, everybody group together for the first one!"

Tonks grabbed Teddy and moved to the front of the group, whilst Sirius and Remus stood behind her. _Snap! _Tonks, stood alone with Teddy._ Snap! _Tonks and Remus._ Snap! _The Lupin family. _Snap!_ The two Marauders. _Snap! _Teddy with his arms around Padfoot's neck. _Snap_! Sirius, standing in what he called 'The Sexy Beast Pose". _Snap!_

Hermione lowered the camera, laughing. "Oh, thank you all so much! These are wonderful. I'll take the rest as candids." She turned to lay the camera on the table beside her, only to find a hand gripping her rest, stopping her. She looked up to see Remus, grinning.

"And what did you think you were doing?"

She blinked. "I was putting the camera down. I can put it somewhere else..."

Remus laughed, "Wrong answer, Miss Granger. The correct answer would have been "Trying to get out of being in any photos. And I would have said "No bloody way!" and taken the camera. Now, let's try again, shall we?"

Hermione gasped. "No, no, I don't want...that is, well, I don't _need _any photos of myself. I see myself all the time!"

Sirius loped over, whispering, "Love, that's the point. I don't think you see yourself at all." Aloud, he said, "Righto Moony, you ready?"

Remus grabbed the camera and grinned. "Ready when you are, Pads."

Sirius nodded. Without any warning whatsoever, he turned, picked up Hermione and threw her over his shoulder. _Snap!_ He put her back on her feet, gasping and spluttering, only to pick her up and cradle her in his arms, all before she managed to get her breath back. She stared at him in shock. _Snap! _

By that point, Hermione could breathe enough to squawk "Sirius! Put me down!" He pretended not to hear her, choosing instead to waltz around the room with her in his arms, laughing loudly. _Snap_!

"SIRIUS! I'm getting dizzy! Put me down now or I'll hex you into next year!"

Sirius paused long enough to put her down, then continued on his wandering dance of the room solo, gasping out "Hex ME? You wouldn't hurt old Padfoot, would you?" Hermione pulled out her wand in response.

Sirius yelped and transformed into Padfoot. Hermione narrowed her eyes and stalked closer, at which point he whimpered and took off, galloping throughout the room, dodging this way and that, with Hermione flying after him with her wand outstretched, giggling. She was completely unaware of Remus snapping away madly.

Suddenly, Sirius stopped. It was so unexpected that Hermione kept running for a few moments after he had stopped. She approached him, warily. "Sirius? Are you hurt?"

The large black dog shook its head, wearing what could only be called a wide doggy grin.

She frowned in confusion, looking at Padfoot, who had gathered himself up, almost as if he were ready to pounce, tail wagging madly, and suddenly, she just _knew_. "Oh no, don't you dare! Padfoot, I'm warning y- augggggggggggh!" She broke off the last of her sentence when the dog launched itself at her. She jumped back in the nick of time and starting running through the living room, with Padfoot now chasing _her,_ barking happily as he bounded after her. Once more she was so preoccupied with running and shrieking that she was completely oblivious to Remus snapping away with the camera.

Just as she was about to complete another circuit of the living room, a couch suddenly moved in front of her, blocking her way. Tonks had the only free wand in the room. As Hermione turned and looked at her, she saw the large grin on the young woman's face. _Traitor, _Hermione thought. However, her thoughts were cut short as the big black dog now had her effectively cornered.

"Sirius, don't you -auuuuugghg!" She shrieked, as, with a joyful bark, Padfoot launched himself at her, knocking her to the floor and licking her face, slobbering her in the process. "Padfoot! Stop that!" The dog paid no attention to her, licking away with his sandpapery tongue and panting madly. She could hear Remus and Tonks, roaring with laughter, and Teddy's high pitched giggle. She could have sworn she also heard a _snap! _

_I'll kill them!_ She thought.

However, once more her thoughts were interrupted, this time by a high pitched, "I play! Padfoot, Mynee, play?" Followed by a very small body flinging itself at her. She managed to catch Teddy, who squealed in delight as the giant dog obligingly began to lick them both. This time she was certain that she had heard a _snap!_

After a few more minutes of intense licking, Padfoot moved back, transforming back into Sirius, and sporting an enormous grin on his handsome face. He cast a quick drying charm on both of them, then stood watching as Remus snapped another photo, this one of Hermione cuddling Teddy, giggling, as they both lay on the floor. Tonks suddenly came and knelt down next to them both, kissing Teddy. _Snap!_

Tonks stood and pulled Teddy with her, allowing Hermione to stand up herself. She stood, dusting her clothes and mock-scowling at Sirius, who conjured a halo over his head, a look of utter innocence on his face.

Remus sniggered and, walking over to SIrius, handed him the camera and vanishing the halo. He then turned and walked to Hermione, casting a quick cleaning charm on her, and smiling benignly at her. She smiled gratefully at him, and was about to speak when he suddenly grabbed her in his arms and dipped her. _Snap!_ He righted them both, then, not allowing her to pull herself together, he grabbed her in a bear hug, swinging her around, laughing as she shrieked. She could hear Tonks laughing like a madwoman, and gasping out, "Never trust a Marauder, 'Mione!" _Snap!_

Remus finally put her down, smiling at her._ Snap! "_"Sorry 'Mione, I just couldn't resist!"

Hermione moved to the couch and flopped onto it, exhausted. "Well, that was certainly an energetic photo-shoot! I'm completely done for!"

Tonks summoned a glass of orange juice from the kitchen and gave it to Hermione. Like Hermione, Tonks was very comfortable with all things muggle, and enjoyed muggle drinks. The Lupin house was an interesting blend of magical and non-magical culture.

Hermione drank thirstily, draining the glass. In the meantime, she could see Sirius and Remus fiddling with the camera, changing the film, she presumed,

Remus looked up. "Mione, mind if we copy this? I'd like a copy of these pictures."

She shook her head. "Go ahead."

She watched him duplicate the film, then pull a potion from a nearby cupboard to develop the film. A few minutes later, two neat stacks of pictures sat on the table, neatly packaged by Remus in white envelopes, one of which was labelled _Hermione_.

In the meantime, Sirius popped a new film into the camera, and then laid it on the table.

Hermione was so focused on the two of them that she didn't notice Tonks had sat down next to her until the other spoke.

"Bloody exhausting, those two. But just what I need when I'm feeling down about myself. Not that I'd ever tell them that, the plonkers," she said with a fond smile.

Hermione raised an eyebrow at her. The other woman looked her straight in the eye.

"We all have our insecurities Mione. Even me. When you're a Metamorphagus, you always wonder whether people want _you_ or just what you can make yourself look like. Now that I have Remus, most days I'm OK. I know he loves me the way I am. But even I have my off days. Not that I doubt Remus, you understand- I just have days where the old insecurities lurk in my head, the doubts that anyone could want _me,_ just me. You understand?"

Hermione looked at her hands, not knowing what to say. She knew Tonks was telling her about her own insecurities in the hopes of getting her to open up. She was flattered that she cared enough to do that, but at the same time, she couldn't tell Tonks. She just couldn't.

Luckily, Tonks saved her the trouble of deciding what to say."I know you don't want to talk about it Mione. I respect that, and I won't push you. But I will say I think there's a lot more going on here than meets the eye. I think you know what I mean. I want you to know that I'm more than happy to listen, without offering advice unless you ask for it. I won't judge, I won't overreact to anything you choose to tell me. As I said, I won't push. However, I will say I think bottling it up is very unhealthy, and will make it harder and harder for you to banish these thoughts. You need to let things go, Mione, and to do that, you need to talk about them, to come to grips with them and get closure. Talk to someone. If not me, then Remus or Sirius. Heck, talk to Teddy if you want, although I don't know how much help he'll be. The point is, don't let it fester inside you. You have already given up so much of your life for the sake of the war- don't give up anymore!"

With that, Tonks stood, winked at Mione and strolled over to the boys. "Why don't we go and sit outside and enjoy the sunshine? We could have a picnic lunch a bit later, and you boys can fly your brooms and get rid of some of that excess energy."

The eager grins on their faces made the women laugh. Hermione stood, scooped up Teddy and walked towards the door, conjuring hats for the both of them. Once they were outside, she applied the sunscreen charm to both herself and Teddy, and then popped him in his sandbox. He immediately began digging, beaming. She flopped on a close-by lounger, summoning her sunglasses from inside and popping them on. She sighed, relaxing.

The others soon followed, the boys carrying brooms and immediately mounted them, flying into the air. Tonks followed Teddy into the sandbox, playing with Teddy. Warmed by the sun, and exhausted by her sleepless night and energetic morning, she fell asleep.

She slept for close to an hour, unaware of Tonks conjuring a parasol to shade Hermione's face, or of Remus placing a silencing charm around her chair so their chattering wouldn't disturb her. Nor did she notice Sirius looking down at her thoughtfully for a time before walking to Teddy's sandbox and plonking himself down next to Tonks.

"She won't talk to you either?"

Tonks shook her head. "I know she has body image and self-esteem issues, although to be honest, I think those have been there for a long time. I think none of us knew because she hid it so well. But I really think that this is much more than just self-esteem and looks. I think it's much deeper than that. I also think that she is trying to protect herself by keeping certain barriers up and not letting anyone in."

Sirius nodded, rubbing his chin in thought as Remus joined them. "I think the stunt Harry and the others pulled on her birthday was only the icing on the cake. I think the real damage was done long before then."

Tonks sighed. "Sirius, I know he's your godson, but if I get my hands on Harry, or the rest of them for that matter, I'll hex them until my hand falls off!"

Remus nodded. "He's James' boy, and all of ours really, but I'm so disappointed with the way he and the others have been treating her. I believe she thinks, on some level, that she's entirely replaceable and that no one would notice if she left."

Sirius agreed. "I think you're right, Moony. Did you notice how, when she offered us the portkeys, she looked scared that we would refuse? It's almost as if she thinks we won't miss her enough to change our routines a little to see her! I think part of her was honestly worried that we quite simply wouldn't bother."

Tonks nodded consideringly. "I think you're right. She seems so surprised anytime we do something for her. And did you see her reaction to the gifts? I thought she was going to try and give them all back!"

Remus was silent, then quietly offered, "I think she honestly believes that she is not worthy of affection, or gifts, and that she is worthless. I think that's why she's afraid to let anyone in again. She feels that if we see her, all of her, we will reject her too. And unfortunately, though we have been close to her, we have not been so close as to share in _all_ her confidences. We each of us only know bits and pieces. I worry that, if we try to push for her to confide in us now, she will believe it is merely because we feel sorry for her after what happened with Harry and the others."

They say together in silence, pondering. After a time, Tonks stood and told Remus to remove the silencing charm. "Let her wake up on her own, love. I'll go and make us a picnic lunch."

He stood up, removed the charm and took his wife's hand. "I'll help."

As the couple walked inside, Sirius sat alone with Teddy in the sandbox, thinking. He thought about Harry, his Godson, the son he never had and the son of his best friend. He thought with a pang of loss about James and Lily. He thought about friendship and loyalty, and his heart grew heavy.

Whilst he loved Harry dearly, he agreed with Remus that Harry had not been a loyal friend to Hermione for quite some time. He also suspected that Hermione's loyalty to Harry went far deeper than anybody knew. The Trio had not talked about their experiences on their hunt for the horcruxes. By the way they had evaded the topic, he knew that terrible things had happened then, things they did not want to relive. He wondered if Hermione had ever spoken to anybody about those days._ How_, he wondered,_ could they leave her alone to deal with all of that? Ron and Harry are the only ones who might possibly have understood. How could they?_

Feeling his anger rising again, Sirius took a few deep breaths and calmed himself. After a few minutes, he stood with a sigh, and grabbing Teddy and casting a cleaning charm on him (how on earth could one small boy collect so much sand?), he walked towards the sleeping girl. As he sat on a nearby chair with Teddy on his lap, he wondered, not for the first time, just what he could do to help her out the hole she seemed to be falling into.

_I have to something_, he thought. _I can't let her bear it all alone. She's worth far too much to me, to all of us. Hell, she's worth __**everything**__. _


	6. Chapter 6: Benvenuti a Roma

**Disclaimer: My story, JKR's world and characters.**

_**A/N:**__ Hello lovely readers. Here is the next chapter in my little story. Here's hoping it meets with your approval. Thank you to all those wonderful people who left such kind reviews. I hope you enjoy this chapter! Keep reading and reviewing!_

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_Italian Ministry of Magic, Roma: 3pm local time _

Hermione breathed a sigh of the relief as the world _finally_ stopped spinning. Having never taken an international portkey before, she had been entirely unaware of just how...uncomfortable the experience was. Her head felt as if it were still spinning, whilst her feet seemed oddly still.

Clutching her bag and her wand, she wobbled her way over to the security desk in the Portkey Arrivals wing of the Italian Ministry of Magic, a lovely, marble tiled area with mahogany and leather furnishings.

She cast a quick translation spell on herself and waited patiently in line, thinking back over the past few hours. It had been a very pleasant morning spent with Sirius, Remus, Tonks and, of course, her little Teddy. Despite a few...awkward...moments which had touched on things she didn't even want to _think_ about, let alone discuss, she had enjoyed herself very much. She thought fondly of the shrunken package of photographs in her handbag, and the fun they had taking them. She smiled, thinking of the impromptu picnic they had shared, before she had said her final goodbyes and promised to return later that day with the promised portkeys. She had apparated straight to the Ministry's International Travel Grounds, where, with a portkey from James Grafton, she had left for the Italian Ministry of Magic.

She snapped back to reality when she heard her portkey ID being called. "2pm portkey, from the British Ministry of Magic, please approach the desk."

She slowly walked forward (she still didn't trust her balance after that whirlwind portkey trip) and presented herself to the dark haired young lady at the marble counter.

"_Buongiorno_, I am Hermione Granger." Inwardly, Hermione cringed. That –along with a few other words_ - _was about the extent of her entire Italian vocabulary. _Ah well, _she sighed. _I'll use the translation spell for the time being, I but MUST learn the language properly. It's only right if intend to live here for a year..._

The young woman smiled warmly at her. "_Benvenuti a Roma, Singorina_. _Scusa_, but would you be so kind as to pass me your wand for identification purposes?" She added in English.

"Of course." Hermione passed her the wand at once.

The young woman examined it carefully, and then placed it in what appeared to a small box. A quill suddenly rose from the desk, scribbled quickly on a piece of parchment, and fell back to the desk. The young woman picked up the parchment, and compared it with another paper she had.

"Ah, twelve inches, vine and dragon heartstring, it matches the description given to us by your _Signore_ Ollivander. Very good." She handed Hermione her wand, and then stood. "With your permission, _Signorina_ Granger, I will perform the basic security checks?"

Hermione nodded and stood still as the woman waved her wand in complicated patterns, casting various detection and revealing charms. Hermione knew the charms, of course, as they were standard Ministry Procedure in Britain. They consisted mainly of detection charms for dark artefacts and prohibited potions. The revealing charms dispelled any glamours and nullified the effects of polyjuice potion. She was suddenly glad she'd thought to wear a jacket, as the glamours with which she hid her scars would have been stripped away, and she hated the stares they inevitably caused.

"_Grazie_, _Signorina,_ all is well. If you would be so good as to be seated, I will send for _Signore_ Martinelli immediately."

Hermione smiled politely. "Of course, and please call me Hermione."

The young woman smiled widely, unable to believe this famous war hero and sought after ministry official would allow security staff to address her by her first name. Everyone in Europe had heard of _Signorina_ Hermione Granger. She was heralded as one of the brightest witches in the past five hundred years.

"_Grazie, _Hermione. You honour me. I am Cecilia, Cecilia Theresa Leone."

"I am very pleased to meet you, Cecilia." Hermione smiled as she seated herself on a sofa in the waiting area. She watched avidly as a now beaming Cecilia grabbed a quill and sorted through various parchments on her desk. She selected one and scribbled a few words on it, then replaced the quill, smiling as she saw Hermione watching with some curiosity.

Hermione blushed when she realised that she had been caught staring. "I'm sorry, Cecilia, I was just wondering how you were using the parchment to contact _Signore_ Martinelli. I meant no offense."

Cecilia shook her head, still grinning widely. "I take no offense Hermione. I was happy to see the curiosity you are so famous for in action."

Hermione blushed once more. She was not accustomed to people taking so much notice of her. She certainly didn't expect that her role in a British war would be known overseas.

Cecilia held up a blank parchment. "This is a parchment 'twin'. Each parchment contains _geminio_ and pairing charms, so that what is written on one will appear on the other. We have one for each department, you see, so that, when we wish to communicate with them, it is instant."

Hermione caught her breath. "So simple, and yet so brilliant. Would I be permitted to learn the charms? Are they permitted to be used outside the Ministry? Are there limits imposed by distance? How long do the charms last before they wear off?" Mentally, she kicked herself for the barrage of questions. _Way to look like a nerdy know-it-all on your first day, Hermione_, she cringed.

Cecilia frowned, thinking. "I am sorry Hermione, I do not know. However, I am sure _Signore_ Martinelli will be able to tell you."

Hermione blushed. "Of course. I am sorry, I didn't mean to ask so many questions."

Before Cecilia could respond, a heavily accented voice replied in English from the doorway.

"Do not be sorry, _Signorina. _If we do not ask questions, we will not learn the answers. I think you know this already, eh?"

Cecilia grinned. "I see you are as quick as ever, _Signore_ Martinelli."

Hermione immediately stood and turned to face the tall, elderly gentleman in a black suit and robe at the door. He was tall, and despite his obvious age, stood straight. He had a head of neatly combed thick white hair and a kind wrinkled face with olive skin and eyes so dark, they looked black. _He would have been very handsome when he was young_, she thought.

"It is a great pleasure to meet you, _Signore_."

"The pleasure is all mine, _Signorina", _he said whilst taking her hand to brush his lips against her knuckles.

She blushed. "Please call me Hermione."

"_Grazie, _Hermione. Enrico Martinelli, at your service."

She watched as the tall, handsome old gentleman turned to Cecilia and winked. "Cecilia, it is always a pleasure to see you, _bella_."

The young woman smiled. "Ah, _Signore_, I think you say this to all the girls, no?

He grinned. "But of course. It is not my fault! The beautiful young ladies, they seem to like this old man, and I cannot resist telling them how lovely they are."

Hermione giggled. This was her superior? She _liked_ him. He almost seemed as if he were someone's cheeky grandfather rather than a senior Ministry official. Well, actually, come to think of it, he probably _was_ someone's cheeky grandfather.

_Signore_ Martinelli turned to Hermione. "Ah, you laugh at this old man? You break my poor heart."

Hermione flushed. "Oh no! I would never..."

Cecilia elbowed the old man. "_Signore_, look! You have embarrassed her. Shame on you! She is British, she is not used to your flirting! You behave yourself, _Signore_ Enrico Martinelli!"

The old man nodded, sighing and scrubbing his hands through his thick white hair. "This is true. The British, they have the different customs, no? I apologise, Hermione, if I have made you uncomfortable. Can you forgive this old, how do you English say, buffoon?"

Hermione smiled at him. "There is nothing to forgive, _Signore_. Nothing at all."

He beamed. "Ah, you are a nice young lady. But please, you must call me Enrico! No more of this _Signore_ Martinelli, or I think you are talking to my father, may he rest in peace."

"Oh no, I couldn't!" Hermione stammered.

"Oh I see, this is not the custom in your England? Here, we are not so formal. We all call each other by our first names in the _Dipartimento_ _dei_ _Misteri_. In front of other departments or the public, of course, we must be formal. However, when it is only the _Misteri _team, we can relax."

Hermione nodded shyly. "That makes sense. Very well, I should be very pleased to call you Enrico."

The old man beamed. "_Eccelente_! And now, if you will permit, Hermione, we will bid goodbye to our dear Cecilia here and we will go, _si_?"

Hermione smiled, nodding as she waved at Cecilia who was currently dealing with another traveller. Enrico tossed her a solemn salute, spoiled only by his cheeky grin, then lead Hermione to the door.

She followed him into the hallway beyond and gasped. It was stunning- she could think of no other word to describe it. There were pillars and columns as far as the eye could see, in a magnificent, authentic Roman design. And the entire edifice was made of marble. It almost made her think of the pictures she had seen of the Roman Pantheon, only much, _much_ larger on the inside. Even the furnishings were in a Traditional Roman style, complete with senatorial chairs. Hermione sighed with happiness.

Enrico chuckled. "I take it you approve of our little decor?"

Hermione, unable to tear her eyes from the beauty surrounding her, responded. "How could I not be? It's just _magnificent!"_

Enrico nodded. "Si, it is. I have been seeing it every day for more years than I care to count, and yet its beauty strikes me dumb each time."

"Is this the original decor? I mean, has it been like this since Imperial Rome?"

Enrico smiled. "Ah, do my old eyes perceive a student of history? Yes, much of it has been magically preserved since Imperial times. Some of it predates even that- right back to Republican Rome. Of course, we have made discreet, eh, how you say, modernisations?"

She nodded.

"_Bene_, we have made many modernisations to make things easier for ourselves. Such as the lift we enter now. This old man does not wish to climb fourteen staircases!"

Hermione looked around, trying to find the lift of which he spoke. All she could see were walls and columns.

He smiled. Pulling his wand from his pocket, he pressed the tip directly into the wall in front of them. The wall immediately slid apart, revealing the interior of a modern and rather plush lift.

Ushering her in, he followed her in and pressed a button. The doors slid closed and the lift moved gently upwards. Enrico explained the system to Hermione. "The lift will only open to Ministry employees by identifying their wand. Once side the lift, their magical signatures are examined. If the wand is carried by someone other than the owner, then the lift will not move. This way, we try to avoid impostors and reporters sneaking in uninvited. Anyone who is not cleared to enter on their own must go through the Security as you did, although you will soon be cleared to enter as a Ministry employee."

Hermione nodded, taking in the information. She glanced around the lift and noted that the buttons were labelled with various departments. Each department seemed to occupy an entire floor. Thankfully, the translation spell enabled her to read each of the department names listed.

The life slowly stopped and the doors opened. "_Dipartimento_ _di_ _Misteri" _a lilting female voice announced.

"Ah, we have arrived. After you, Hermione."

Enrico ushered her out of the lift and started walking. "Welcome to the Department of Mysteries, as you English call it. Now, we go to my office, where I give you your _Ministero_ identification papers and authorisations. Then I show you your office- we leave the rest of the tour until tomorrow, eh? I think maybe you want to settle into your new home."

Hermione smiled appreciatively. "Yes, that would be very much appreciated. I have to unpack, and I need to return to England briefly this evening."

Enrico nodded. "Of course, I am sure your family must be very anxious to make sure you are well."

A look of sadness flashed on her face for a brief moment, before she successfully masked it. "Yes, I'm sure they are."

The old man noticed the look, but wisely said nothing, instead leading her past a number of polished doors before stopping in front of one. The nameplate read _Enrico Martinelli, _and another below it, _Custode dei Misteri_, which, thanks to the translation spell, she knew to mean 'Keeper of the Mysteries.'

She watched as he placed his hand on the door, causing it to swing immediately open. He noticed her look.

"The door wards, they recognise the occupant's magical signature and will only open for the occupant. The _Custode_, he can also enter if he needs to, but each such entry is recoded." He explained as he led her to a large mahogany desk, not unlike her own at home.

He waved her to a chair, exclaiming, "Please, sit, sit. Can I offer you some refreshment? No? _Bene_, I retrieve your papers. Excuse me for a moment," as he walked over and began rummaging through a large wooden filing cabinet, muttering to himself in Italian.

Hermione took advantage of the opportunity to look around the office. It was very large and spacious, filled with mahogany and leather furniture. There were two cream coloured leather visitors' chairs with a small mahogany table in front of the large, mahogany desk. Behind the desk sat a dark brown leather executive chair. On the side of the room were two large mahogany filing cabinets, in one of which Enrico seemed to have buried his head. She saw what he meant when he said they had modernised certain aspects of the building.

"Aha!" He exclaimed, emerging from the filing cabinet with a leather portfolio. He moved to his desk and sat down, extracting a sheaf of papers.

He passed the first parchment over to Hermione. "This is your contract of employment with the _Ministero_. Please feel free to read it, but I must warn you that the penalties of breaking the contract are imprisonment and loss of magic for one year. Not that I expect this to be a problem for you, Hermione, but I am obliged to tell you."

Hermione skimmed through the contract and found nothing untoward. It was almost identical to her previous contract.

"I agree to these terms, Enrico. May I borrow a quill?"

"Of course," he replied, handing her a magnificent tawny coloured quill.

She signed the parchment and felt her magic tingling, signalling that a magical contract had come into effect.

"_Bene, _your signature has now been added to the _Ministero_ wards. You will be able to apparate, portkey and Floo directly to this department, and if you would be so good as to press your wand to the contract, the lifts and building entrances, they will recognise you also."

She did so, and felt a brief tingle in her wand arm.

"This paper is your international apparition license, although I am sure I do not need to tell you that it is foolish in the extreme to apparate such a long distance unless you are particularly sure of your location. Also your concentration and focus, they must be at their peak. Apparating to another country whilst exhausted will lead to more than splinching- it can drain your magical core beyond repair. _Alora_, we prefer that you use portkeys or Floo for international travel. Nevertheless, as a Ministry Official of a certain rank, you do possess the right to apparate internationally. It is also your responsibility to ensure that you are permitted to enter the country to which you are apparating and arrange the appropriate papers." He handed her the parchment, for which she thanked him.

"This is your portkey and Floo clearance. You have access to the _Ministero_ Atrium, the _Misteri_ entry point, research area and library, and of course your own office. You also have access to the entry point of the other departments; however it is for them to allow you in. Security., you understand, yes?" She nodded.

"Ah, of course, you are also authorised to create international portkeys at will, and create a private Floo network of up to ten people. This, I think, is more convenient than having to go through your British Ministry Floo Protocol, no?"

She grinned mischievously. "It certainly is. It could be months before they even bothered to look at the application!"

Enrico nodded, grinning. _"_Ah, the Bureaucracy. It is an irritant, is it not? Now, let me see...ah _si_, here we have the lease of the Ministry apartment at the _Torri_ _Via_ _Veneto_, for the duration of one year. You may choose to extend this lease, or purchase the apartment from the Ministry at a later date. You will please sign the lease if it is to your satisfaction? You will note that all expenses excepting personal items are covered by the Ministry, and for this we give your, how you call it, card of the bank account. We will also pay for your meals in the ristorante here. "

Hermione read through the lease, her brain reeling from the information overload, and signed it.

"_Bene_." Enrico lifted his wand and muttered, "_Geminio._ Here is your copy of all of your documentation. Now, we to go your office."

He stood, causing Hermione to follow his example. They walked out of his office and further down the corridor, stopping at a door labelled _Hermione Granger_. Hermione hesitantly placed her hand on the door, which immediately opened. She walked into a lovely office, virtually identical to that of Enrico, although it was noticeably smaller. Still, it was bigger than the cubicle she had in England. Not to mention prettier. She looked around, studying it well.

"I think I know it well enough to apparate here now." she said softly.

_"Eccelente. _Then if you would be so good as to hold tightly to this key, we will portkey to your new home."

She grabbed hold of the proffered stick and closed her eyes, waiting for the usual jerk behind her navel and the accompanying nausea. Instead, felt nothing. She then heard Enrico's concerned voice.

"Hermione, are you ill? Shall I send for the healer? Or would you prefer to go to St Rocco's?

She opened her eyes and gasped. They were in what appeared to be the living room of a stunning apartment, standing in front of a closed glass door leading to a large balcony. It was what she could see beyond the balcony, however, that had made her gasp. The apartment overlooked the _Porta Pinciana_ and _Villa Borghese_, a place she had dreamed of seeing since she was a small child. She was dying to visit the _Villa Borghese_ and the fabulous gallery therein.

"Hermione?"

She blinked, and realised that Enrico had been calling her name for the past few minutes. He was now peering worriedly at her.

"I'm so sorry! I'm perfectly well, I was just so surprised at how comfortable the portkey was, and then when I saw the _Villa Borghese_, er I mean, the view..." She trailed off, blushing profusely.

Enrico chuckled. "Ah, _si_, it calls to one, does it not? Something tells me that you will be visiting it very soon. But, _scusa_, what did you mean by the portkey surprising you? They are different in Britain?"

Hermione nodded furiously. "Oh yes, they are. In fact, that they are extremely uncomfortable and usually cause nausea and dizziness. The international one I took to come to Rome was the worst. I felt as if the whole world was spinning for a good fifteen minutes after!"

The old man was visibly puzzled. "You are telling me the British _Ministero_, _scusa_, Ministry, they use the old portkeys still?"

She raised an eyebrow questioningly. "Old portkeys?"

Enrico nodded. " Si. Almost ten years ago, we improved the portkey travel by the addition of stasis charms, with close to a low-powered stunning charm paired with an enervation charm, both interwoven by a motion charm."

Hermione stared at him, the possibilities racing through her mind. "So when a person takes hold of a portkey, they are mildly stunned just as they begin to move, and they are automatically re-enervated once the portkey has stopped moving. Because they were essentially frozen, there is no nausea, no dizziness and no disorientation. Amazing..." She breathed.

Enrico chuckled. "You are as quick as they say you are. Yes, this is how it works. It was a very large collaboration between our department, as it required movement through space and time, the charms innovation department, the portkey division of the magical travel department and healers from St Rocco's hospital. It took us seven years to perfect, however, we have offered the creation process for sale to other governments five years ago. I cannot believe they have not yet purchased it! This is very odd."

Hermione shook her head ruefully. "It does not surprise me. There are many still in the British Ministry who resist change for the sake of it. Now, Enrico, will you show me this method? I was hoping to create two reusable portkeys for my...family in England to visit me."

The old man nodded. "_Certo_. I will show you, and I will procure for you the papers for these guests to visit you. If you give to me the names, the permissions, they will be granted instantly. I have the power to permit these as a, how you say, chief of department?"

"Oh, thank you so much! That would be wonderful. Only if it's not too much trouble, of course. I don't want to be a bother."

"Bother? For this old man to help such a beautiful girl? Never!" He winked at her and stood up, taking out his wand, noticing that she did not seem to accept the compliment, giving him a polite half-smile. _Strange_, he thought. _Perhaps this is a normal English reaction? I will have to wait and see._

Taking up the stick they had just used as a portkey, he pointed his wand at it, moving it in a series of complex patterns, and then intoning _portus_. The stick immediately glowed blue, then faded to its original dull brown. He then waved his wand over it in the counter-charm, disabling it.

"Now you try."

Hermione took a deep breath and focused intently on the stick in front of her, waving her wand it in the required movements and imbuing it with the required charms. She finished, muttering _Portus_. The stick glowed blue, signifying that the charms had worked. She grinned happily, loving the satisfaction of getting a new spell right the first time.

Enrico shook his head ruefully. "You really are the brightest witch of your age. You achieved it the first time, a spell of such complexity- this is incredible! You make this old man very happy that you work for us, eh? _Alora_, since you have mastered this, I will see to your guest's papers. The non-magical government will not require any such papers as both Britain and Italy belong to the European Union. However, the Magical government requires that we are aware of who enters our country at any given time, because of the...how you say...impact magical persons can have on both magical and non-magical populations. So, if you will be so kind, the names please?"

Hermione nodded, and cast the counter-charm on the portkey she had created. She then transfigured the stick into a piece of parchment. Casting a dictation spell, she clearly stated, "Lord Sirius Orion Black, Mr Remus John Lupin, Mrs Nymphadora Tonks-Lupin, Master Theodore Remus Lupin." Then, thinking, she hastily added, "Ms Luna Evana Lovegood." Mentally, she shrugged. Who knew? Hermione would tell Luna where she was soon and maybe Luna would visit- best to have all the paperwork on hand.

She handed the parchment to Enrico, who frowned at it. "_Scusa_, but you have not included Harry Potter or Ron Weasley." Even the Europeans knew of the Golden Trio after all.

She pasted a smile on their face. "No, I haven't. To my knowledge, their paperwork is up to date should they wish to visit."

It was true. The way those two had hopped all over the place during the past few years, they had papers for just about anywhere. No need to mention it would be a cold day in hell before she told them where she was- or that they likely wouldn't even notice that she had gone.

Enrico's face cleared. "Ah, of course. Forgive me, I am an old man, and my thinking, it is slow sometimes. Very well. I will see to these papers and will return here in half an hour. This is acceptable?"

Hermione nodded.

"_Eccelente_. I leave you to unpack, then. If you care to look in the kitchen, you will find fresh vegetables, meat and other groceries placed there this morning under the usual cooling and preservation charms. If you have any further questions, I return in one half hour. _Ciao_, Hermione, _e_ _benvenuti a Roma_!"

* * *

_Meanwhile, at the Lupin Residence..._

Sirius stared at the swirling contents of his coffee mug, so deep in thought that he did not hear Moony calling him from the kitchen.

"Padfoot, can you come in here a minute? Padfoot?"

He did, however, notice the almighty shout of "PADFOOT!"

Sirius jumped and immediately spilled hot coffee all over his lap, dangerously close to certain treasured parts of his anatomy. He growled in frustration and waved his wand, casting a cleaning and cooling charm.

By this time, Remus had come into the living room to see why Sirius had not answered and saw his best friend inspecting his lap. He grinned at this prime opportunity to stir Sirius.

"Pads, I thought inspecting your bits had lost its appeal long ago. Shall I bring you a magnifying glass so you can see them properly?"

Sirius merely grunted in response.

Remus was shocked. No witty comment? No swearing? And not even _one_ finger stuck up in his direction? _Something is wrong_, he thought.

"Pads? You OK?" He asked, placing his hand on his friend's shoulder.

Sirius nodded, frowning, and further convincing his friend that something was wrong.

"Padfoot, what's wrong?" Remus queried.

"Wrong?"

You haven't been yourself since Hermione left an hour ago," Remus pointed out.

Sirius sighed and sat back in his chair. Remus took this as his cue to sit on the opposite chair. He looked at his friend, lifting his eyebrow questioningly.

Glancing down at his hands, Sirius tried to find the correct words to articulate his worries to his best friend.

"You know what we were talking about before? When Hermione was sleeping?"

Remus frowned. "You mean about Hermione doubting her worth? And her lack of self-esteem?"

Sirius nodded. "It made me think, you know. Why do you think she doubts herself so much? I mean, people don't just suddenly wake up and decide they are worthless. There's always a root cause, external encouragement, or _something_. I know Harry and the others have abandoned her, and that would be enough to make anyone feel like they weren't appreciated. But...harsh as it seems, I don't think it's enough. Like I said before, the damage was done long before that stunt they pulled, what with the way they've been acting the past year. But what if it goes even further back than that?"

Remus nodded consideringly. "You mean, their behaviour and treatment of her when fighting during their friendship might have crossed the line between selfish and just plain mean?"

Sirius shook his head, trying to find the right words. "No. Well, yes, actually I think it did. But what I'm talking about is when they _weren't_ fighting- those years at Hogwarts, the year on the run, that kind of thing. Did they ever make... comments in passing? Did they say things she took to heart? How did they treat her? I didn't see them together very often, what with being on the run and all..."

"Ah, I understand. The opinions of our friends, especially when expressed in peaceful and seemingly sincere tones, carry even more weight."

Sirius nodded, relieved that Remus had understood.

The werewolf frowned in concentration. "Well, I didn't get to see them 'in action' together for prolonged periods, you understand- except for the year I taught at Hogwarts. That was their third year, I believe. I'm not sure that I remember all that much of their interaction...ah, yes, wait a minute! The Firebolt incident."

Sirius squinted in confusion. "The Firebolt incident? The Firebolt I sent Harry?"

Remus nodded. "They may or may not have told you that they had rather a bad falling out over the Firebolt?

Sirius nodded.

"Well, then you know that when the Harry opened the broom, Hermione wanted them to report it, because she was worried that 'the dangerous and deadly Sirius Black' might have sent Harry Potter a cursed broom to try and harm him. You probably also know that she told McGonagall about it when they wouldn't, and that she confiscated it to test it. What the boys tend to gloss over is that they treated her very badly for the weeks it took to get it back. During that period, I don't think I ever saw them together- they were always ignoring her. Hell, I remember a few times in class she'd glance at them and they wouldn't even look at her! She seemed to lose her appetite and lost a lot of weight. In fact, I remember Hagrid telling me that she visited him a lot and that he was worried about her. They virtually cut her out of their existence for those few weeks. Of course, after they got the broom back, everything was OK between them- or so the boys say."

Sirius was silent for a moment. "Alright, that is quite bad, I'll admit. But it's still not what I'm looking for. That was during a fight- it was unacceptable behaviour nonetheless, but it was during a fight. But how did they behave _normally_?"

Remus thought for a moment. "Well, I know that they were often seen together, although Harry and Ron would disappear to play chess or practice Quiddich. Usually, Hermione was either watching them or in the library studying during those times. I'm also fairly certain that she and Ron got into a fair few fights about schoolwork- he was always quite lazy, to be honest, and Hermione was, well, Hermione. She was hardworking and brilliant. Laziness and sloppiness never really sat well with her and so she would push the boys to study more. Harry occasionally tried but he mostly followed Ron's example. I'm told Ron used to call her 'a bossy know-it-all swot' quite often when they fought. She still used to 'look over' their schoolwork quite often though."

"Look over?"

"She would either write or heavily edit their essays," Remus snorted. "I used to notice it quite often when I was marking DADA papers."

Sirius nodded slowly. "So, they were lazy, then, and made fun of her brains and study habits, but they were still happy to take advantage of them anyway?"

"Yes, I suppose you could put it that way", Remus sighed. "Doesn't exactly make one feel appreciated, does it?"

Sirius barked a sardonic laugh. "No, I'd imagine it wouldn't. What else can you tell me?"

Shrugging helplessly, Remus shook his head. "Not an awful lot, really. After their third year I wasn't around much. Fifth year at Gimmauld I didn't see much of them together either- except for the fact that Hermione was the only one who could get Harry out of his room when he thought he was being possessed by Voldemort. Remember? Apart from that, there was only the Department of Mysteries. She almost died that night..."

Shoving aside his revulsion at the idea of Hermione dying, Sirius sat deep in thought for a moment. "So we have a few ideas of what could have cause this, but not the whole picture...Hey, wait a minute!" He exclaimed. "Remember what we spent most of our time talking about third year and up?"

Remus looked at him strangely for a moment. "Quiddich...and girls! Of course. Those three were so close, Harry and Ron probably forgot that she was a girl."

Sirius nodded. "Yeah, and as sensitive as we males are, Ron Weasley is in a league of his own. If he sat there with Harry spouting off lists of beautiful girls at Hogwarts and Hermione didn't even rate a mention, imagine how she would have taken it!" He frowned. "Again, it's something, but even if it's true, it's just not enough...bloody hell! This is frustrating. I just wish there was someone we could ask. Aside from Hermione that is, because I have a feeling she won't tell us a damn thing."

Remus sighed. "Yes, that would be best, but who can we ask?"

Grabbing his wand, Sirius stood up with a sigh. "I don't know, Moony. I hope we can find someone soon. It hurts seeing her like this. It's not right- she's the best of us. Gorgeous, brilliant, kind and witty... Hell, she's absolute bloody perfection. Seeing her trying to hide away, as if she's ashamed of her very self...God Moony, it actually _hurts._"

Remus sat stock still for a moment, and then looked up at Sirius with a look of dawning comprehension on his face. A huge grin spread across the werewolf's face.

Blinking down at him, Sirius asked, "What?"

"What do you mean?" He asked innocently.

Sirius frowned. "That look - I know that look. It's the 'I've-just-discovered-something –fascinating-but-I-won't-tell-you-so-don't-ask' look."

Remus grinned wickedly. "Oh, I'm sure I don't know what you're talking about, my dear Padfoot. Anyway, where are you off to?"

Still suspicious, Sirius replied. "I'm off to give Lira her portkey. I'm supposed to meet her for a coffee break, and then I'll be back in here in an hour or so to wait for Mione."

Remus smirked. "Of course. Please give Lira my best, won't you?"

"Alright...OY! Mooney! Enough with the smirking! What is going on in that brainy head of yours?"

Remus just smirked and stood up to walk back into the kitchen. "Oh, nothing, nothing at all."

Sirius stared at him, before shaking his head and apparating to St Mungo's with a pop.

Remus stood looking at the spot where his friend had stood moments before, and began to laugh.

"Oh, don't you worry, old friend, you'll find out soon enough. This situation is about to get very, very interesting,"

* * *

_Hermione's flat, Roma:_ _5:00pm local time_

Half an hour later, Hermione fell onto the couch, exhausted, and waited for Enrico to return. She looked around the flat, still unable to believe it was hers, that she was really here.

She had kept all of her own furniture, as the flat had been empty on arrival. Strangely enough, her furniture looked better suited here than in her flat in England. Her elegant mahogany and leather furniture looked just right in the study, her old fashioned bedroom set, complete with sheer bed curtains and a large mirrored dressing table with matching stool, seemed to have been made for the room. She loved the large marble suite attached to her room and the two guest rooms. Her living room was spacious and looked homey, now that it had her entertainment system, specially charmed to avoid magical interference, along with her favourite leather lounge and recliner chairs. The kitchen contained her dining set, and the usual appliances- refrigerator, now full of food, toaster and so forth-, also charmed to avoid magical interference. She smiled wryly. Despite her ten years as a witch and the usual cooling and preservation charms, she liked her muggle comforts. Thankfully, as the flat was in a muggle building, it had electricity.

However, she still needed to buy furniture for the second guest room and the formal dining room, rooms she did not have in her old flat. She would do that either tomorrow night- Enrico had told her the shops were open until eight o'clock- or on the weekend. Considering today was Thursday, it was much of a muchness, really.

She had even managed to locate a few photo frames and put up some of the pictures she and the others had taken that morning. The one of the Lupin family and Sirius she had enlarged and hung on the wall in the atrium, just after the entry hall. Hermione loved wizarding photos and how they moved. This was one of her favourites- Tonks was kissing Teddy, whilst Remus kissed Tonks. Sirius was grinning at the both of them. Then they would all look up and wave at the camera, before it started all over again. On the opposite wall, she had hung a large framed muggle photo of her parents, laughing on the beach.

The shot of Tonks and Remus and another of Padfoot and Teddy hung in the living room, as did the 'Sexy Best that is Sirius' shot. The shot of the two Marauders and another of Tonks and Teddy sat on either side of her desk in her study in silver frames. A shot of Tonks kissing Teddy hung in her room, as did a picture of her parents dancing at a Christmas Party five years ago.

She had also created three international portkeys with the additional charms built-in, as Enrico had taught her. Hers was a rose brooch that she had bought years ago and had never worn, the Lupins' was a fountain pen, and Sirius' was a dagger shaped letter opener she had forgotten she had. The activation phrase to come to Italy, and more specifically, the Atrium in her apartment, was 'Roma, activate', and the return phrase was "London, Activate." As these were not emergency portkeys, and therefore would not be worn or carried at all times, it didn't particularly matter if the phrase was unimaginative. As both the Lupins and Sirius had given her portkey access to their homes, she had set each portkey to take the bearer between her Roman apartment and their own homes.

She had even managed to take a shower (Merlin, she loved her new bathroom!) and was now dressed in jeans and a lilac peasant top. Her glamours had been re-applied. Goodness knows, she didn't want _anyone_ seeing those scars. It was bad enough that Remus had seen them once.

Hermione was startled out of her thoughts by a quiet 'pop'. She walked into the Atrium and saw Enrico looking at the picture of her parents. He was clutching a leather portfolio similar to the one he had given her, the contents of which now resided in the lovely box that 'Teddy' had given her for her birthday yesterday.

"_Ciao_, Hermione. I have brought the papers. These charming people, they are your family?" He asked, pointing at the photo.

"They are," she replied proudly, but with a tinge of sadness.

He noted the sadness that touched her eyes but, as he had only known her a few hours, he curbed his instinct to ask her about it. Instead, he followed her to the living room and looked around the now furnished apartment, noting the empty dining room through the doorway.

"As promised, I bring you the papers. It is all, as you say, by the book, and they are ready for use immediately."

Hermione thanked him and accepted the portfolio.

He hesitated, then offered, "I hope you will forgive a nosy old man, but I see that you still lack dining furniture. You have need of other furnitures?"

She looked curiously at him and nodded. "Yes, I need furniture for the second guest bedroom. Why do you ask?"

The handsome old man grinned sheepishly and pulled a thick catalogue from his robe. "I thought you might find this useful. They are very honest traders and superb craftsman. For what you require, I believe everything will be completed in under an hour."

Hermione stared at him disbelievingly. "An hour? Enrico, that's impossible! Even the most talented wizards would need at least four hours to-"

He interrupted her, smiling. "Ah, but that is the point, no? They are not wizards. They are, eh, how you call, house elves! A large group of them own and run this company themselves, and one third of their profit supports those elves who cannot find work."

Hermione beamed. "They have commercial and trading rights here? Oh that's wonderful! I can't tell you how happy that makes me. This is a subject very dear to my heart, Enrico."

Enrico winked at her. "Ah, we have all heard about _Signorina_ Granger and her relentless quest to liberate the house elves of Britain. I think you will find the house elves here are very friendly to you because of that." Hermione grinned. She was so pleased! Not that she was apparently known here, she didn't care about the fame. No, she was ecstatic that the elves here were equal citizens and could earn money for their work like everyone else.

She opened the catalogue and looked through it. These elves certainly did good work! How could she possibly choose? Suddenly, she stopped, staring at the picture. She had found it- it was _perfect_. A dining set in the Louis Sixteenth style, complete with a table seating eight people, matching chairs and a side board and display cabinet.

Enrico grinned. "I think it is love at first sight, no? The Louis Sixteenth, it is my favourite also. I call Robi for you. Robi!"

A little elf dressed in a small suit popped in. "_Buona Sera_ _Signore_ Martinelli, _buona sera singorina_." He greeted in a high pitched voice.

Enrico smiled. "_Buona sera,_ Robi. _Come sta_?

The elf grinned. "_Va bene, grazie_."

The old man knelt down to talk to the small elf. "English, please Robi. _Signorina_ Granger does not yet speak Italian."

The elf's tennis ball sized eyes grew wide. "_Signorina_ Hermione Granger?"

She nodded, smiling. "_Si_."

The elf squealed and bounced up and down on the spot. "This is an honour! We have heard much about you, _Signorina_, and what you did for our English cousins, especially in the year after the war."

In her seventh year, Hermione had petitioned for elf rights using her then recent celebrity status, with a limited success.

Hermione smiled. "Please call me Hermione. I'm sorry to say that the British ministry still has a long way to go before they recognise elves and other non-humans as equal citizens."

The nodded vigorously. "This is true, _Signorina_ Hermione, but you obtained for them the right to quit the service of abusive masters without shame, at the very least. This is as close as our English cousins have come to freedom for centuries."

Hermione knelt before the elf. "I hope one day they will have the liberties and rights that their Italian cousins enjoy."

"As do I, _Signorina_ Hermione."

They were interrupted by a third voice. "As much as I regret disrupting this conversation, Robi, I must ask your for help. _Signorina_ Granger has moved here from London, and finds she has less furniture than she needs. I think we can help her, no?"

The elf bounced up and down excitedly. "_Si_, _si_! We help! What would the _Signorina_ Hermione like?"

Hermione showed him the catalogue, pointing out her choice. "May I have this dining set, please?"

The elf glanced at it and nodded. "_Si_, of course _Signorina_. We do this for you. We can do anything else for you?"

Hermione frowned in thought for a moment. "Well, I have a full guest bedroom set. I wonder if you could duplicate it exactly for me for the second guest bedroom?"

The elf smiled. "_Si_, _Signorina_. We copy anything you like! If that is all, I start the work for you.

She nodded. "Yes, that's all I need. How long do you estimate the work will take?"

The elf smiled widely. "I tell you in one minute!" He popped out of the room.

Before Hermione had even had the chance to turn to Enrico, Robi was back. With about a hundred house elves, all of whom were beaming at Hermione.

She stood still, shocked. "Er, hello everybody?"

"_Buona sera_ _Signorina_ Granger!" They chanted back.

She glanced at Enrico, who appeared to be trying to smother a laugh, then turned back to the elves, wondering what she should say.

Robi, however, saved her the trouble. "_Signorina_ Hermione, all of our workers have offered to help you. We estimate that, between all of us, we finish in fifteen minutes. This is acceptable to you?"

Her jaw dropped. "Fifteen minutes? How can you...I mean, of course, yes. That would be wonderful."

She shook her head to clear it. "How much will this work cost?"

Robi stared at her. "Cost? For you _Signorina_, is free! We could not accept money from you! The chance to build for you is its own reward!"

Hermione blushed. "That is so very kind of you, Robi, but I could not possibly accept-"

"May I be permitted to pay for Hermione's expenses?" Enrico cut in. He winked at her, then turned back to elves. "This is a living expense after all. It is not the fault of Hermione that she did not have enough furniture to fill her new home. As her employers, it is the Ministry's duty to ensure this problem is solved. Do you agree?"

Robi frowned, then turned to the other elves, who nodded. He turned back to Enrico. "_Si_, we can accept this, _Signore_."

"_Eccelente_," Enrico beamed. "Now Hermione and I get out of your way and let you work. Hermione, could I be so rude as to trouble you for a nice hot _cafe_?

Hermione, still reeling from the elves and their generosity, to say nothing of Enrico, did not respond immediately. A few moments later, the question permeated her mind and she blinked.

"Of course. Please, come to the kitchen."

* * *

_St Mungo's Hospital, London 3.30pm local time_

Sirius walked to the main desk in the spell damage ward and, winking at the receptionist, asked if she could send a message to Lira to let her know he was there. Blushing at the handsome man, the older woman scribbled out an internal memo and sent it off with a flick of her wand. He waited patiently, thinking of the box in his pocket.

About ten minutes later, the petite blond walked out of a nearby room and, seeing Sirius at the desk, waved him over.

He thanked the receptionist and loped over to his girlfriend. "Hello, love," he murmured, giving her a soft kiss on the lips. "How's your day been?"

"Busy," she sighed, running her hand over her perfectly coiffed hair, held back in an elegant chignon. "So much to do, and never enough time to do it in."

Slipping his arm around her, he announced, "Time for a short break, love. Where shall we go?"

Shaking off his arm, she frowned at him. "Go? What do you mean, go?"

He looked at her in confusion. "We're supposed to meet for a quick coffee, love, remember?"

She sighed in frustration. "I completely forgot. I'm sorry Sirius, but I cannot go anywhere just now. It's far too busy and we're getting another patient in about an hour. Can't we do this another day?"

"Well, of course. I was just looking forward to seeing you, you've been awfully busyduring the past couple of weeks. I missed you."

Watching as another internal memo zoomed towards her, Lira frowned distractedly. "Yes well, we'll meet later, there's no need to make such a fuss."

Taken aback, and a little hurt by her thoughtless comment, Sirius nodded. "Of course. Perhaps tomorrow then. In the meantime, I have something to give you." Taking the box from his pocket, he noticed her face suddenly pale. When opened it and took the plain gold band engraved with her name all round from it, she all but sighed in relief. He frowned, mystified at her odd reaction.

_What the hell was that about?_ He wondered.

"This is an emergency portkey to Black Island. I've adjusted the wards to allow you access, and they'll give me warning if you arrive. Activation phrase is coconut tango." He told her, holding the ring and waiting for her to hold out her hand.

She stared at it.

"Lira?" He asked after a minute had passed. He felt a complete idiot standing there in the corridor, in plain sight holding a ring while she stared at it.

"Oh, I'm sorry Sirius, you surprised me a little. It's very thoughtful of you, but I simply can't accept it."

Sirius couldn't have been anymore surprised if someone had told him that Dumbledore was in fact the muggle spy hero, James Bond.

"Come again?"

She smiled sweetly at him. "Sirius, dear, you know very well I can't wear rings on the job. It's not at all professional. Besides which, what on earth do I need a portkey for? The war is long over!"

"Yes, it is...but emergencies do crop up out of wartime. There are always criminals on the loose and if something happens, it would be a good idea for you to have an escape route. Besides, what do you mean you can't wear jewellery? Half the bloody hospital staff wears wedding rings and the like! This is just a plain gold band. Hell, if it bothers you that much, disillusion it."

Lira shook her head. "Now, Sirius, I know you've lived and fought through two wars, but really... don't you think these measures are slightly... excessive?" She asked delicately.

Sirius narrowed his eyes. He was a Black and he understood what people said along with what they didn't say_. She thinks I've got...issues from the war. Where is all this coming from? _He wondered. _It's not an unreasonable idea, having an emergency portkey._

"Lira, I understand that you might find these measures slightly ridiculous, but I'm telling you, as an auror, I see crimes committed daily that would make your hair curl. Criminals like thieves and rapists don't wait for war- they attack when it suits them. I thought you might like to have a way out of such a situation that couldn't be taken from you along with your wand. I myself wear one. So do Remus, Tonks and Hermione. We all thought it was a good idea. There's no need to make insinuations about paranoia."

She pursed her lips consideringly. "Yes, well, it's very kind of you Sirius but I won't pretend to see why you think it so necessary. If you and the others feel that is helps you in dealing with the trauma you experienced during the war, then so be it, but personally, I think it's an irrational exercise."

Sirius stiffened. "You may see it as such," he stated coolly. "But do not speak of things you will never understand. If simple common sense does not appeal to you, then so be it, but you had best avoid making insinuations about my family. Send me an owl if you are free to meet for lunch tomorrow."

Putting the ring back into his pocket, he apparated home. He needed some time alone before meeting the others again.

* * *

_Hermione's flat, Roma-5.30pm local time_

Hermione clutched her rose brooch, ready to depart. The elves had finished, true to their word, in exactly fifteen minutes and the result was a masterpiece. Enrico had paid them and then left himself. She had argued with him about the costs, but he had soothed her worries by pointing out that the Ministry made it a point to sponsor these elves at every possible turn. This was merely another opportunity to do so. She could hardly disagree with that, and so had given in.

She checked that her satchel contained the portfolio of travel papers Enrico had given her and the other two portkeys. Seeing that they were, she checked the newly erected wards on her apartment and activated the portkey.

In what seemed like the same moment, she arrived at her London Flat. She turned on the spot and apparated to the Lupins' front door.


	7. Chapter 7: Notice Me Not

**Disclaimer: The story is mine, the characters and Potterverse belong to JKR. **

_**A/N:**__ Hello to all of you wonderful readers! Here we have the next chapter of our little story. Just a few points I wanted to share: _

_Firstly: thank you thank you thank you THANK you for all of your wonderful reviews. I honestly can't tell you how much it means to me. Just a few short weeks ago when I posted my very first chapter, I was almost certain that no one would pay the slightest attention to my story- to receive so many wonderful comments is truly humbling and inspiring. _

_Secondly: The wait is almost over! The reckoning for Harry and Co. is almost here! It will be the VERY NEXT CHAPTER! I am actually still in the middle of writing it at the moment. I'm sorry I couldn't get to it sooner, but these characters are so STUBBORN! No matter how much I try to force them, they refuse to rush. They have their own traits and their own pace and since it is really their story, alas, their will carries the day._

_Thirdly and finally: This chapter does touch on some very sensitive issues such as self-hatred, eating disorders and death (in passing) although not in a particularly explicit fashion. Just a warning for those who would prefer not to read such material. This is something a little close to home for me, as it has deeply affected someone I love dearly. I would just like to take a moment to dedicate this little chapter to all those suffering from eating disorders, depression and self-loathing, and to stick in a little reminder: Even when when we feel like we don't matter anymore and no one would notice if we dropped off the face of the earth, we DO matter. We always matter. Every person is valuable and precious, and deserves to be loved. _

_ Enough notes, on with the show! I hope you enjoy the chapter._

* * *

_Hermione's flat, Roma: 8am local time_

Hermione lay comfortably in bed, reveling in the softness of her new cotton sheets. _ So good_, she sighed, stretching languorously in the king sized double bed. Her admittedly oversized bed was one of the few indulgences she allowed herself- she simply loved having the space the roll around in her sleep without having to worry about falling off._ It probably dates back to my time on the run, _she thought_. Merlin knows how I survived sharing cramped quarters with two teenage boys._ Fearing the hurt that line of thought would dredge up, she banished it from her mind and returned to the important matter at hand- new linen.

She had bought new sheets and towels at a lovely little store on the _Via Del Corso_ that she had stumbled into quite accidentally. They were pure Egyptian cotton and felt simply _wonderful_. She smiled, thinking back over the past week.

It had been exactly nine days since her relocation to Rome, and she had to admit, she had enjoyed every minute of it. She had met all of her colleagues at the _Dipartimento di Misteri_ and they had been very welcoming towards her. To her utter surprise, she had discovered that a large number of the senior ministry employees were muggleborns. Francesco, her guide for the day, had been prepared for her surprise when she commented on the fact. "Ah, _si_, most of Europe has heard of the British purebloods and their monopoly of the British government. They have kept Britain far behind the rest of the world, no? But is not so here. There is prejudice in some circles of course, as with any other country, but here, the law, it is on the side of the ordinary citizen. It is ability that should determine our future, not our bloodlines." Hermione had felt a deep joy at that, hopen at the chance to prove herself on her own merit and a feeling of belonging that she had not felt since receiving her Hogwarts letter. She had known then, deep inside, that she was exactly where she was meant to be.

Hermione smiled, thinking back on the past week week. She had enjoyed her new assignment, which combined a number of her areas of interest- she was investigating the link between conscious thought and bouts of accidental magic, and why they decreased significantly after obtaining a wand. The _Ministero_ wished to use this information to increase the potential of wandless magic. It had been noted that whilst bouts of accidental magic were often powerful and could perform very complex actions, wandless magic proper, as practised by those few witches and wizards who were able to master it, worked only with the weakest and most basic spells. She had been given authority to consult with other departments and external experts as she saw fit, provided they signed the relevant secrecy contracts, and so she had assembled a small team. It comprised of employees from the Accidental Magic Detection Squad, a fellow _Misteri_ colleague by the name of Gianni, who specialised in the mystery of thought, and a member of the Wandless Magic Research Team in Bologna. The most unusual member of her team was an elderly enchanter living in the wilderness surrounding Mentorella, who was famous for his written works on the links between meditation and spell-casting. Interestingly, the old man used a staff rather than a wand, and Hermione privately suspected that the mild-seeming Antonio could probably perform fairly advanced magic without even that.

Yes, she was enjoying her work. As for her social life…it was as it had ever been, she supposed. She had visited Remus, Tonks and Sirius on the evening of her arrival in Rome to give them their portkeys and travel permission papers. They were astounded to hear about the new form of portkey travel and were anxious to try it. She had therefore brought them to see her apartment, proudly showing them her new home. They had all been suitably impressed, particularly when she had told them about Robi and the other elves, and they had oohed and aaahed over her new furniture. However, what had most impressed Remus was when he learned that a nearby by café made delicious chocolate and _Nutella_ pastries. Enrico had told her of it when they had shared coffee together that first day.

Unsurprisingly, they had eaten dinner at that same café, with Remus managing to demolish half of the chocolate pastries on the menu, much to the owner's delight. He had even purchased a two-litre jar of _Nutella_ to take back to England with them that night, and only Tonks' confiscation of the jar had stopped him from dipping into it. They had all burst out laughing at the childlike pout on the werewolf's face.

Hermione frowned. She was a little concerned about Sirius, though. He had seemed more withdrawn and reserved than she had seen him for a long time. She was certain something was bothering him and had asked him at the first available opportunity. They had been standing on the living room balcony, overlooking the _Villa Borghese_ and enjoying the view. "Sirius," she had begun softly. "I hope you don't think I'm being nosy, but you don't seem to be yourself. Is something the matter?"

He had half-smiled then. "I can't hide anything from you, can I, love?"

She had blushed and looked away. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to pry-" she began, but he had interrupted her.

"Mione, don't apologise. You're one of the few who has the right to ask me anything you like. You're right; I am a little out of sorts. It's nothing serious, really- Lira and I had had a small tiff earlier. I suppose I'm still annoyed about it."

He had told her that Lira had refused the emergency portkey he had had made for her. Hermione was puzzled as to why Lira would refuse such a gift, but she suspected there was more to the situation than Sirius was letting on. However, she knew Sirius- he would talk about it when he was ready and not before. She had merely hugged him in support, causing him to wink at her, before sliding his arm about her waist as they stood in silence, gazing at the beauty before them. They had stayed there until Remus had finished buying anything and everything he could get his hands on at the local deli and returned with Tonks and Teddy. The three visitors had then hugged her and portkeyed back to London, promising to return on Saturday week- today.

Allowing herself one last luxurious stretch, she forced herself out of bed and shuffled over to her oh-so-decadent bathroom. After using the facilities, she stood pondering. _Bath or shower?_ _Hmmmm….the others won't arrive until eleven- that gives me almost three hours…..OK, Bath it is, _she grinned_. _

Stepping over to the large circular marble bath, she smiled in anticipation. She turned on the taps and reached for the scented oil, watching as the bath, easily big enough to fit three or four people comfortably, slowly filled. Switching off the taps, she delicately poured in a small amount of scented oil, and quickly cast a mild warming charm. As the smell of frangipanis filled the large bathroom, she pulled off her cotton nightgown and knickers. After pinning her curls on top of her head and laying her wand on the shelf next to the tub, she stepped into the bath and sighed with pleasure. _Bliss,_ she accorded. _Pure bliss._

After washing, she allowed herself to simply enjoy the bath. She lost track of time entirely as she sat, head resting on the marble walls behind her, drifting in and out of consciousness and falling slowly back to sleep. She awoke twenty minutes later, when the warming charm wore off off and the water had begun to cool rapidly. _Oops_, she cringed. _I think that was a subtle hint that my time is up._ Reluctantly standing, she pulled the plug to drain the water and, seizing her wand, she cast a quick _scourgify_ at the bath. After casting drying and deodorising charms she stepped out of the bath wrapped in her one of fluflly new towels. She made for her bedroom, trying to decide what to wear for the day's outing.

Peaking outside the curtains, she saw that it was a warm, sunny day with a with clear blue sky. Returning to her wardrobe, she considered her choices. She looked first at a knee-length black cotton skirt that she had bought several years ago. It was in a flared style and was quite comfortable. She could pair it with a loose aqua short-sleeved top, flat black sandals and a black cardigan. It would certainly hide some of that excess weight she had…

She sighed for a moment. _I do have that lovely white dress that Tonks gave me last year- I could wear it with strappy white sandals. That would be so ….classic- exploring Rome on a balmy, beautiful day in a white summer dress._ She turned hesitantly to her closet and extracted the dress in question. Pulling on a nude coloured satin bra and matching panties, she removed the dress from its hanger and slipped on the dress. Taking a deep breath, she forced herself to move to her stand mirror and examine her reflection.

The dress was certainly pretty, she thought. It had wide shoulder straps, with a modest scooped neckline that skimmed the very top of her breasts, a fitted bodice and a flared skirt that stopped about four inches above her knees. The dress was made of a soft linen fabric and was fully lined. Turning this way and that, she considered whether or not she should wear it.

_My arms are too fat_, she thought. _I need to wear something to hide them. _Slipping on a white bolero, she examined the result. _The bolero certainly solved the arm problem_, she thought. Unfortunately, it did nothing for the numerous other problems that seemed to crop up. Her eyes teared up as she suddenly saw imperfection upon imperfection reveal itself. _My breasts are too big to wear this dress, _she panicked_. They make it cling too much- I look ridiculous. _Continuing her perusal, she became more and more frantic_. My hips look enormous clad in such a light colour! I need a dark colour to make them look smaller. And sweet Merlin- my thighs are hideous! I have to cover them! When did they get so big? I must have put on weight._

In tears, she tore the dress off and cast it to the floor. She stood, breathing heavily, and then moved towards the cotton skirt and aqua top. It might be yet another outfit in the dowdy Hermione Granger collection, but people her size couldn't be picky with what they wore. Not for the first time, she wished she had the lovely, svelte figure she seemed to see on every other girl but herself. Hell, even Tonks was slim, and she had had a child! Hermione, more to the point, was not a big eater _and_ she had been on a diet since she moved here! She had halved her already small portions and started going for a brisk half hour walk every evening. What did she have to _do_ to look like a decent human being? Glaring at her offensive reflection, Hermione took hold of herself. _You've never been a beauty, Granger. Dress for your size, stay invisible and get over it. In the meantime, you need to step up that diet or else you'll turn into a hippogriff._

With that, she slipped on the outfit and matching sandals, unpinned and brushed her hair and then marched into the kitchen. Reducing her portion size wasn't enough, it seemed. So, she would just have to cut certain foods right out of her diet. _Just because I'm already fat and plain doesn't mean I need to let myself get any worse,_ she told herself. She searched through the pantry until she found the muesli she had purchased yesterday. She carefully measured out a tiny portion and sliced half a banana on top. Milk, however, proved to be a problem- she had no skim or low fat milk. Sighing, she decided to forgo milk today, vowing to buy skim milk later.

After eating the meagre portion, she cleaned the cereal bowl and brushed her teeth. Having done this, she made her way to her study to collect some reading material , her antique wall clock showing that she had a little over an hour before the others arrived. She browsed through her extensive library until an old favourite seemed to call out to her- Jane Austen's _Pride and Prejudice_. Slipping the large tome from the shelf, she took her sunglasses and made her way out on to the living room balcony. Seating herself comfortably in one of the four padded balcony chairs, she placed her book on the small glass table and cast a sunscreen charm over herself. She then opened her book and began to read.

"_It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife."_

With those familiar words, she once again lost herself in the world of Elizabeth Bennet. She was so enraptured with the literary genius of the great Jane Austen that she hardly noticed the passage of time, nor did she notice the arrival of four guests in the Atrium an hour later. The first indication that she was no longer alone was when a familiar, deep voice drawled over her shoulder, "The butler did it."

Hermione jerked violently and promptly hit her head on the chin of the handsome man standing close behind her.

"Shit, that hurt! Mione? You OK love? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

Blushing violently, she turned to a grimacing Sirius. "I'm so sorry Sirius! How utterly clumsy of me!"

He waved his hand dismissively. "Rubbish, love. I frightened you and should have thought how you'd react before standing so close to you. It's my fault." He grinned at her, giving her the famous, Sirius Black Puppy Dog eyes. "Can you ever forgive me?"

She shook her head at his antics. "Silly man. We both know it was my fault, I've always been terribly clumsy."

_He's probably just trying to make me feel like less of an idiot than I already do_, she sighed to herself.

Looking at the dashing figure standing in front of her, Hermione suddenly felt extremely self-conscious and out of place. Clad in black jeans, a blue button up shirt and a black sports coat with black leather shoes, Sirius looked like model out of a mens' clothing magazine. His black Ray Bans only added to the effect. Remus looked just as perfect in his dark blue jeans, white button up shirt and navy sports coat, complete with black leather shoes and black Ray Bans, similar to those Sirius wore. Teddy wore a miniature version of his father's outfit, and looked adorable. However, Tonks had them both beaten.

One look at Tonks was almost enough to send Hermione rushing back to her room to hide under the bed. She wore a white spaghetti strap sundress with a fitted bodice and a hem that stopped about five inches above her knees. Sporting waist length wavy blond hair, dark green Ray Bans and flat white sandals whose laces crisscrossed her slender calves up to her knees, she was perfect.

_Oh my God, _Hermione panicked. _They look simply perfect together and I look like a-a- WHALE! I should have worn a long dress, at least it would have hidden my legs. Oh, I wish I could wear my Ministry Robes, they hide everything. _

Noticing Hermione's slightly panicked expression, Tonks smiled gently. "Wotcher, Mione! Are we ready to go? He-" here she jerked her thumb in the direction of her husband –"has been ready and raring to go since about seven 'o'clock this morning! I think he's been dreaming of chocolate pastries for over a week!"

Hermione managed to smile warmly back at her friend, despite the feelings of shame and embarrassment coursing through her. "Yes, I imagine he has. I am ready to leave whenever you like."

Remus stood with a hopeful look on his face. "Can we go now?"

Tonks elbowed her husband. "Remus! You could at least say hello first!"

The werewolf sighed. "Hello, Hermione. Alright, now can we go?"

Sirius guffawed as he led the group inside, closing and locking the balcony door after them. "Eager much, Moony?"

Remus scowled as he picked up Teddy.

Hermione solved the problem by responding softly, "Let me set the wards and we can go."

She reset the security and locking wards, picked up her bag and disillusioned herself, the others following suit. With that, they apparated out of the apartment to the back of a nearby building, so as not to land on top of any passers by. Seeing the coast was clear, they removed the disillusionment charms, Remus put Teddy on the ground and together they strolled down the _Via Venetto _and onto a side street to what was likely to become Remus' favourite café- _Café Marino_.

It was a very small, cosy place, entirely unlike the many elegant establishments lining the _Via Venetto_. Hermione liked it for that very reason. The simple wooden chairs and tables covered in red linen tablecloths, and the creamy walls decorated with black and white photographs simply added to its charm. The owner, one Giovanni Marino, was a jovial, slightly round, balding man in his late fifties who ran the business with the help of his wife, Sofia. Their two sons, Marco and Roberto, visited at times with their families and often stopped by on weekends to help their parents run the café. The atmosphere was warm and homelike, filled with laughter and the delicious aromas of Sofia and Giovanni's cooking.

Hearing the bell ring as the door swung open, Giovanni looked up with a wide smile to see the group entering the café, and greeted them in English. "Ah, _Signore_ and _Signora_ Lupin, with _Signore_ Teddy! _Signore_ Black also? And the _bella_ _Signorina_ Granger, _buongiorno_! Please, sit, sit and I shall bring you a menu. You come for the café and pastry, _si_? It is too early for the lunch."

Hermione opened her mouth to respond but before she managed to utter so much as a word, someone had beaten her to it.

"Hello Sin'or Gi'o! Teddy want numnum! Eat now?"

Giovanni beamed at the small boy and reached out a hand to tousle his hair, whilst everyone else stifled their laughter. Thankfully, Tonks had cast a glamour over Teddy's hair, causing it to appear sandy brown. Teddy's usual habit of changing his hair colour according to his whims could easily break the International Statute of Secrecy. They could certainly do without that today, Hermione thought.

"But of course, _Signore_ Teddy, you shall eat!" With that, Giovanni located the menus and placed five of them on the table. He left them to peruse the options at their leisure. Everything looked so good…

Remus had immediately turned to the pastries labeled '_Con_ _Cioccolato_', a dreamy look of contentment on his face. He was evidently trying to choose between a fluffy _Nutella_ pastry coated in icing sugar, or chocolate _Cannoli_, muttering aloud to himself as he tried decide. The others still looked to be weighing their options.

Hermione was engaged in her own mental debate however, it was not nearly as pleasant as Remus'. She was trying to determine which item on the menu would be the least fattening, and had so far failed miserably. Each of the delicious pastries on the menu would add weight to her already significant mass, weight she could ill afford to gain. To make matters even more difficult, she was battling with a voice in her head that was demanding strawberry crepes (or _crespelle con fragola_, as the Italians called them). Finally, in an attempt to silence that irritating voice, she closed her menu, and, placing it facedown on the table, she waited for Giovanni reappear.

The others looked to have made their choices also, as they copied her actions and placed their menus on the table. Instantly, Giovanni returned to their table.

"Ah, you have decided already? _Bene_, what I bring for you?"

Unsurprisingly, Remus spoke up first. "I'd like a _cappuccino_, two chocolate _cannoli_ and a-a-… _sfogliatella_ with chocolate, please." Seeing their grins, the werewolf flushed. "What? I'm hungry."

Chuckling, the café owner noted the order. "_Certo_, _Signore_ Lupin. I shall ask Marco to place the extra chocolate on top, yes?" At Remus' vehement nod, the café owner chortled and turned to Tonks.

"_Signora_ Lupin?"

"I'd like the _crespelle con fragola_ and a _latte_, please." Tonks stumbled slightly over the unfamiliar words.

Nodding, Giovanni scribbled on his pad and turned to Teddy.

"And you, _Signore_ Teddy! What can Giovanni get for you today, eh?"

Tonks smiled and whispered in her son's ear, pointing to a certain entry on the menu. Teddy nodded and, pointing to the same place, declared importantly, "Want Ferr'at please! Wif choc'lat milk! Fank you sin'or Gio!"

Hermione blinked. _Ferrat? What on earth is that? _She wondered.

The café owner grinned, leaning over to see what Teddy was pointing at. "Ferr'at? Ah, you like the _Ferratelle_? _Si_, of course. And I think maybe we also like some warm chocolate on top, no?"

Teddy clapped happily. "Yes please! Like choc'lat!"

Smiling at the small boy's enthusiasm, the café owner turned to Hermione, who indicated Giovanni should take Sirius' order first.

"_Signore_ Black?"

"Hmmmm…. _Mi piace la_ _Torta_ _Caprese_ _e_ _un_ _espresso_, _per favore_." Hermione blinked as the spell automatically translated it for her: "I'd like the _Caprese_ cake and an Espresso, please." _That was unexpected_, she thought. _His accent is almost perfect. Perhaps it's a spell?_

"_Certo, Signore_. _Signorina_ Granger?"

"I'd like the _frutta fresca_, please, and an _espresso_." She noticed Sirius quirk an eyebrow at her order, no doubt wondering why she was asking for fresh fruit instead of something more substantial.

_This is so embarrassing, I wish the ground would crack open and swallow me up! _She cringed.

"_Frutta fresca, si. _You like it _con_ _crema? Zucchero? _No? You like anything else with it? _Crespelle_, perhaps?"

Hermione smiled politely and shook her head. "_No, grazie_. Just the fruit, please."

Giovanni peered at her in puzzlement before nodding and scribbling the order on his notepad. He gathered the menus and disappeared into the kitchen.

Tonks immediately turned to Sirius. "Sirius, you never told me you could speak Italian!"

Sirius, ever the stirrer, grinned. "Who says that I can?"

Tonks' face fell. "You mean it was just a translation spell?"

The grin grew wider. "I didn't say that."

Tonks rolled her eyes at her cousin. "Can you or can you not speak Italian without the aid of a translation spell?"

Sirius pouted. "Fine, fine, if you're going to be like that…. yes, I can."

Hermione stared at him. "Fluently?"

"_Si_, _signorina_. _Parlo_ _Italiano molto bene_."

Tonks frowned. "What does that mean?"

"It means, 'Yes Miss, I speak Italian very well'." Hermione stated quietly. "And no, I don't speak Italian- I only know a few words. I've been using the translation spell since I arrived, although I am hoping to learn to speak it properly."

Tonks turned back to Sirius. "When did you learn to speak Italian? And why didn't you tell us?"

Sirius smiled tightly. "Languages were a compulsory lesson for every child in the Black family between the ages of three and seventeen. I speak Italian and French. Regulus…." He paused, thinking of his younger brother, long since dead, and took a deep breath to steady himself. "Regulus spoke French and Russian. Your mother speaks French and German. Narcissa chose Italian and German, and Bellatrix "Here he scowled at the mention of his deceased and extremely deranged cousin "spoke Russian and French. I didn't mention it because it has never really come up."

They all understood - he hated any mention of his childhood and preferred not to speak of it most of the time.

Tonks blinked. "Mum? Really? Wow, I had no idea. I have to ask her about it. I wonder why she never mentioned it…."

Sirius smiled tightly. "Same reasons, I'd imagine.

Tonks flushed. "Right, sorry."

Remus snuck a quick kiss. "Don't worry about it, Dora. You weren't to know."

Sirius patted his cousin on the hand. "Absolutely. Don't let it worry you." Turning to Hermione, he cocked his head. "Mione, if you are serious about learning Italian, I could teach you."

Hermione was quick to refuse the offer. "Oh, Sirius that's very kind of you but I couldn't possibly impose on you that way."

He dismissed her protests with a wave of his hand. "Nonsense, love. I'd be more than happy to teach you, and besides, those marvelous portkeys you made have taken the exhaustion out of travelling altogether. Two one-hour lessons a week aren't going to kill me. Unless you've met some handsome young bloke who wants to teach you, and you'd rather have him instead?" He winked.

Blushing, Hermione replied. "Of course not. In that case, I'd be very happy to accept your offer, Sirius. But I insist that you allow me to make you dinner on lesson nights- it's the least I can do."

"Mione, I'm happy to help you, you don't need to do anything in return." Seeing she was about to protest, he quickly added, "But I'd very glad to stay for dinner. It's always a pleasure to have dinner with a beautiful lady."

Hermione looked at her hands, a polite half-smile on her face, whilst inside she was cringing. _I understand, Sirius, I know I'm plain. You don't have to try to make me feel better, but it means so much to me that you try._

Meanwhile, Sirius was frowning at her response to the compliments, guessing the direction her thoughts were heading in, whilst Remus was torn between gazing worriedly at Hermione and trying not to needle Sirius.

"_Lessons, eh, Padfoot? I have to wonder just what you'll wind up teaching her." _He smirked. One look at the downcast girl, though, was enough to wipe the smile form his face. _Whatever it is, I think it will be a lesson she sorely needs. Hurry up and get a move on, old friend, before she sinks even further into this hole._

Tonks gazed thoughtfully at Hermione's downcast visage, and then at Sirius' obvious concern and affection. There was something else in his expression though- something more than mere affection….Could it be? One look at her husband's smug visage confirmed her suspicions- Sirius had begun to develop feelings for Hermione. Or perhaps he was _finally_ noticing the enormous love and respect he had always for her. Either way, it had come not a moment too soon! _About bloody time, Sirius!_ She gloated._ That girl deserves the best and I can't think of anyone who I'd entrust her to apart from you, dear cousin. And you- you deserve someone who knows and loves you as you are- not what you can do for them. That Lira just makes my skin creep, for some reason. Get rid of her before she hurts you._

Tonks knew that, whatever feelings Sirius had, he would never start one relationship before ending another- he was fanatically honest.

Before long, their food arrived and everyone was far too busy digging into their delicious pastries to talk much- except Hermione. She was too busy thinking, and absently pushed pieces of fruit around her plate whilst fighting the temptation to give into her hunger. In an attempt to distract herself from the mental debate, she peaked at her companions and nearly laughed aloud.

Remus was gazing in adoration at his _sfogliatelle, _a large layeredpastry with chocolate between each layer, whilst blissfully eating his chocolate _cannoli,_ which were small deep-friend tubes of chocolate filled chocolate pastry.

Tonks was clearly enjoying her _crespelle con fragola_, delicious strawberry-filled crepes that Hermione knew for a fact were sheer ambrosia. She had ordered them on the previous two occasions that she had visisted _Café_ Marino. The smell was beginning to drive her mad- she felt as though there were a hole in her stomach. Shaking her head to clear it, she looked away from the crepes.

Teddy was happily munching away on chocolate covered _Ferratelle _(waffle biscuits) and sipping his milk, looking as pleased as could be. He was with family and was eating his 'new favourite' food- life was as good as it could get.

Hermione felt a slight pang. _What I wouldn't give for my life to be that simple, she thought._ She was so preoccupied with her thoughts, she didn't notice that Sirius was frowning at her in concern, glancing surreptitiously at her in between bites of his _Torta Caprese_, a delicious smelling flourless chocolate and almond cake.

Coming to herself, she resumed playing with the plain fresh fruit she had ordered whilst sipping her coffee. Noticing that the others were starting to look at her plate in concern, she speared some of the fruit and ate it quickly. This set the pattern for the rest of the meal- every time someone looked at her, she would eat a few token pieces.

She sighed internally. This meal couldn't end quickly enough. Then they could leave and go and see the sights. However, she had a plan - she would not walk around resembling a hippogriff in a skirt. No _this time_, she would not embarrass her friends with her hideousness and drive them away. She knew just what to do. After all, she wasn't called the cleverest witch of her age for nothing.

* * *

_Piazza di Trevi, Roma: 1pm Local Time _

Sirius stood in the _Piazza Di Trevi_, watching Hermione stare in awe at the beautiful fountain, the sun glinting off the blue water. He knew she walked past that same edifice every day to get to work, yet she still could not stop herself from staring at the picturesque statues and stunning pool every time she passed it.

Despite Hermione's obvious pleasure in her surroundings however, Sirius was worried. Hermione's self esteem problems seemed to be getting worse- or they were becoming more obvious. Whichever it was, it was immensely worrying. He noted how Hermione stood back, far from the crowds who were pressing around the fountain, trying to throw in their coins. He smiled, seeing that Remus, Tonks and Teddy were part of those crowds. He winced when one of Tonks' coins hit another tourist square in the nose, and chortled as she turned to apologise, nearly knocking the man into the fountain.

His smile disappeared as he turned back to Hermione. She stood alone in a distant corner far from the fountain, dressed in dark colors- and a jacket! Why on earth would she wear a jacket on such a hot day? He and Remus had long since shed theirs- the early Roman autumn was very warm after all. It made no sense. Her behaviour was becoming more and more worrying.

And as for her meal- worrying didn't even begin to cover it! Sirius had been sure she would have chosen the fabulous strawberry crepes she had been raving about in her floo calls to him last week. Merlin knew they looked irresistible. Yet instead she had chosen fresh fruit, and left three quarters of it on the plate at that! That hardly counted as a snack, let alone a meal! The disconcerting thing was, he knew she was hungry- he could smell it. _One of the times when I could curse Padfoot's enhanced senses,_ he thought. Not only could he smell hunger, he could smell her sadness and worse still, _shame_. Why on earth did she feel shame? He knew Remus would have smelt it too. The werewolf's senses were even sharper than Padfoot's.

And so, Sirius was worried. Why was she standing so far away from everyone? She made it so clear that she wanted to be left alone that even the souvenir vendors were walking straight past her without so much as a glance, as if they didn't see her. Sirius blinked, and then narrowed his eyes. It was as if they didn't…notice her. _She couldn't have….No, _he decided. _Of course she wouldn't cast a Notice-Me-Not charm. Besides I can see her, and so can the others! Hell, Tonks is waving at her_. _We wouldn't notice her if she had used a Notice-Me-Not_.

However, at that moment, a man pushing a cart full of souvenirs rolled straight toward Hermione and didn't stop, despite looking straight at her. Sirius, terrified, was about to call out to her, as he was too far away to reach her in time. However, Hermione happened to glance away from the Fountain at that moment, and her face paled. She immediately jumped out of the way and moved several paces further away for good measure. Sirius' last hopes that she hadn't cast the charm were dashed as the man did not look at her, apologise, or even seem to see her. He simply rolled on past as if nothing had happened.

_She must have modified the charm to allow certain people to see her_, he realised, torn between admiration for the skill it would take to do such a thing, and worry as to _why_ she would do it. _Why would she try to make herself all but invisible? I have to talk to her, alone. This is getting out of hand. Or perhaps she would prefer Tonks? Moony will know what to do. Yes, perhaps that's safer than charging in like a bull in a China shop._

A horrible thought entered his head. Was she so ashamed of herself that she was trying to hide from view entirely_?_ Was that the cause of the shame he could smell?

Making up his mind, he waved at Hermione as he moved quickly towards the fountain. He had to talk to Moony. Now.

* * *

_Fontana di Trevi, Roma: Local Time 1:20pm _

"You think she did _what?" _Remus was flabbergasted. _"_Padfoot_, _you must be mistaken. We can all see her, plain as day."

Explaining his theory as to how Hermione had managed that feat, he then told Tonks and Remus about the 'almost-accident'. "If that doesn't convince you, Moony, then let me tell you something. I've been watching her for the past twenty minutes and not one souvenir vendor has approached her, flirted with her or even looked in her direction. These are Italian souvenir sellers we are talking about- do _you_ think they would ignore a beautiful young woman standing alone?"

Remus' eyes grew wider and wider, until it appeared they could fall right off his head. "I can't believe….I…..the _spell_ work involved, how did she…. But _why_?" He stuttered.

Sirius looked at him grimly. "Did you smell her at the café? Did you smell _it?"_

Tonks looked puzzled. "It?"

Remus, however, looked pained. "Padfoot and I smelled three distinct emotions from our Mione- hunger, sadness…and _shame._"

To say Tonks was shocked would have been a gross understatement. A combination of horrified and stunned was perhaps the closest one could get to describing her emotions at that point. "SHAME? What the bloody hell could she EVER have to be ashamed of? That girl is an angel in human form! I…." She stopped suddenly, and turned to Remus. "Did you say hunger?" He nodded, puzzled as to what, precisely, she was getting at. "But she barely ate a thing…."

Tonks frowned for a moment, thinking, then her eyes suddenly closed in pain, whispering, "Oh, no." Teddy, sensing his mother was upset, turned from the 'pitty wata' hugged her leg.

Sirius was verging on panic. "What? What is it?"

Tonks slowly opened her eyes, looked straight at her cousin, and then at her husband. "I….think she believes that she is so hideous as to be a complete embarrassment for us. She cast the charm so we wouldn't be embarrassed by being seen with her. Have you noticed that she's wearing almost all black? And that she's kept her jacket on in this heat? Did you notice how her clothes are all loose, not at all formfitting?"

Sirius looked stunned. "So, you mean…. the fruit… she's on a _diet_? But surely even people on diets eat more than that. A child couldn't live of that kind of portion."

Tonks hung her head. "How much do you know about eating disorders and how they begin?" She mumbled.

Sirius felt sick. "You can't mean- no. God no. Not my Mione. Oh please God, not my Mione!" He shook his head in denial. "Please, tell me that this is only a guess and you could be wrong?"

It was a measure of how frightened they all were that neither Tonks nor Remus smirked at Sirius' calling her 'his Mione'.

Tonks shrugged miserably. "I might be. One inadequate meal is not enough to base assumptions on. To be completely honest though, based on everything that has been happening, and the attitude she has to her own looks…... I'm so very scared because I don't think I am wrong. We'll watch her at lunch and dinner tonight. If she does the same thing- orders inadequate meals when you can both smell she's hungry- then I think we have our answer."

Both men nodded, then Remus asked curiously, "What made you jump to that conclusion? Even with her behaviour, that wouldn't have been the first thing that came to my mind."

Tonks sighed. "Experience. I learned the hard way just how eating disorders begin." The looks on their faces made her add hastily, "It was a long time ago and my mother helped me before it got too serious. But now is not the time to discuss it, ok? We should get back to Mione. All I'm saying is that if we don't deal with this self-loathing and this self determined dieting now, they can very easily combine and turn into something deadly. So today, we watch. Then we make our plans."

Both men nodded. Sirius turned and swung Teddy into his arms and started walking towards Hermione, who was currently gazing at the various paintings the vendors were selling. He sensed that Remus needed a moment alone with Tonks, and after what he had just heard, he didn't blame him. God, he just hoped they caught this before it turned into an eating disorder. He had seen the results, once- a muggleborn friend at Hogwarts, Audrey King, had suffered from anorexia nervosa. He had never heard of such a thing before then.

She had starved herself for four years and concealed the emaciation with glamours, until she had drained her magical core to such an extent that she could no longer cast them. She had collapsed in the Great Hall and died a few months later. He had never forgotten what she looked like as she lay there. Sirius shuddered, and kept walking. He would not allow that to happen to his Mione. He just wouldn't.

Meanwhile, beside the fountain, Remus had taken Tonks' hand and looked her straight in the eye. "Dora, I know we can't talk about it now, but I would like very much if you could share it with me later. I don't want to push, I just….I need to know. I understand if you don't want to, if it's too painful…." He trailed off.

Tonks smiled sadly at her husband. "It's OK love, it was a very long time ago. I'll tell you about it if you like…..I'm just a little afraid that you will look at me differently after that."

Remus leaned in and softly kissed her. "Dora, I love you, all of you, exactly the way you are, scars and all. Nothing could ever change that."

She smiled tearily at him and took his hand as they began to walk towards the others. He stopped for a moment and looked at her. "Just remember, Dora- to me, you are perfect. Don't ever forget that."

* * *

_Sirius' Flat, London: 2am local time_

Hours later, Sirius sat in the armchair next to his bed, swirling the amber contents of his glass of Firewhiskey. He didn't usually like to drink alone, especially at night; Azkaban had taught him the value of being lucid. Tonight, however, he had needed a stiff drink- he hoped to God it would relax him enough to manage at least a few hours sleep. After today though, that was very unlikely. He sighed heavily, thinking back on the day trip to Rome. Whilst he had been so happy to see Hermione and how much she loved her new home, he had seen and heard things today that had, quite frankly, terrified the life out of him.

Thinking back to the conversation by the fountain, he shuddered and gulped his drink. An eating disorder. Mione! His Mione! _Well, close enough to an eating disorder_, he growled to himself, remembering what Tonks had told them later. "I don't think she is suffering from a full blown eating disorder – yet- but I am convinced that she is teetering on the edge. A few weeks could tip her over the edge if she remains unchecked. We have to do something, NOW. Already, she apparently loathes herself to such an extent that she thinks we would be ashamed of her and has been trying to hide herself. Plus, we saw that she is becoming….irrational when it comes to her eating habits. That is a deadly combination. The longer she continues on this path, the harder it will be to turn back. Believe me, I know what I'm talking about."

Sirius stared into his drink. _Irrational is right_, he sighed to himself. She had barely eaten a thing all day. They had watched her at lunch, and whilst everyone else had ordered pasta, pizza and other fabulous Italian foods, she had chosen grilled fish and boiled vegetables, only eating the vegetables and a small portion of fish. Dinner had been even worse- she had ordered a _Panzanella_ Salad, which contained bread, olives and Fontina cheese, among other things. The problem was that she had carefully picked out most of the bread and cheese. And she hadn't even finished the salad! Her eating habits seemed to worsen with every meal- Sirius could not believe that it could have gotten this bad so quickly, or that someone could starve themselves out of self-hatred. However, he wasn't taking any chances- he knew better than anyone just how irrational self-hatred could make a person.

He was terrified of what could happen if this continued. Tonks was right, something had to be done, and soon. The three had port-keyed back to the Lupin residence and, once they had put teddy to bed, had talked long into the night.

In the end, they had decided that Sirius was to visit Hermione the day after tomorrow, being Monday, to start their Italian lessons. He would Floo her tomorrow to make the arrangements. After dinner, he was to tell her honestly and openly of their concerns. Tonks had said she was willing to talk to Hermione about her own experiences if Hermione wished. They had agreed that as Sirius was closest to Hermione, he would he the one to approach her. _God help me if it backfires_, he sighed, rubbing his forehead. He knew that Hermione wouldn't believe him if he told her she didn't need to lose weight, so he intended to offer to accompany her to the Healer of her choice and seek _their_ opinion. He also wanted written information as to what constituted a healthy diet for an ordinary person. He wanted to make sure she was eating everything she ought to, and, as he was admittedly no expert on dietary intake, he wanted the information from a professional.

It wasn't much of a plan, he would admit, but it was either that or portkey to her apartment and beg her not to do this, to tell her how perfect she was, that she had nothing to be ashamed of. Somehow, he doubted it would work. He fervently hoped that if a Healer told her she was under-eating, it might make a difference. He hoped with every fibre of his being that she was not yet so far gone that her razor sharp logic would fail her.

However, one thing was certain: he would do whatever it took to help her through this and he would be there every bloody step of the bloody way! _Don't you give up on yourself, Mione love, because I WILL NOT give up on you. I will NEVER give up on you, _he vowed.

Sirius took another gulp of his Firewhisky, trying to clear his mind. Dwelling on the matter at this hour wouldn't help- he need to relax so he could get some sleep. Of course, his mind refused to cooperate and consequently switched its focus to an entirely different problem: Lira.

He frowned, thinking back over the past week. Her behaviour had been… pleasant. She had been her usual self, as if the harsh words they had exchanged at St Mungo's had never occurred. He knew he should have been pleased; after all, every couple fought and there was no use in dwelling on it, but the truth was, he wasn't happy. He wasn't happy at all.

Her comments had stung, true enough, as had her refusal of the portkey. But it was the underlying assumption that he- and the others- were not entirely rational due to their 'wartime trauma' that had bothered him. Well, admittedly he had not fought in the second war proper. His twelve years in Azkaban probably made that a moot point, though. Either way- was that how she saw him- as a half-mad, paranoid victim of the justice system, clinging to people torn by similar experiences? If that was the case, why had she stayed with him? That was what was really bothering him. Why had she stayed? Even a month before, he would have said that it was because she held a genuine affection for him. However, now, he wondered….

The look on her face when he had pulled out the ring box had surprised him. It had taken him quite some time to understand what could cause such a vehement reaction in the normally cool and collected Lira; it was because she had thought it was another kind of ring. She had thought it was going to propose.

What worried him was the brief look of revulsion that had flitted across her features. Whilst he understood that, had he proposed, it certainly would have been a shock, as they had not yet discussed the possibility of marriage, he could not understand the _revulsion_ on her face at the idea. There had been no warmth, no love or affection evident. Worse, when she had seen that the ring was _not_ an engagement ring, she had looked relieved. Relieved! What hell was going on? He was no expert, but he knew that most women would at the very least be flattered to be proposed to, even were they not inclined to accept. Was the idea of marriage with him so utterly repulsive?

Draining the last of his drink, he stood and, with few flicks of his wand, cleaned and levitated the glass back to the kitchen. With a quick cleaning charm to his teeth, he pulled off his robe and climbed into bed. He could not abide pajamas unless the temperature was a few degrees short of freezing, and so wore only his silk boxers. James had always teased him about being too 'hot blooded' to tolerate sleepwear, he remembered with a fond smile. Sighing, he turned onto his side. Tomorrow, he would take Lira out for dinner. He'd pull out all the stops and make it a nice evening- perhaps all they needed was some time together, without the stresses they both had. Having formed a plan, he closed his eyes and tried to sleep.

* * *

_Sirius' flat, London: 9:30 am, local time_

He was awakened by a loud tapping at his window. Groaning, he sat up and rubbed his eyes. It seemed like he had just fallen asleep. What time was it anyway? A glance at his clock said it was nine-thirty. _Tap Tap Tap_! "Alright!" He sighed. "I'm coming. Bloody bird…." Forcing himself out of bed, he shuffled over to the window and opened it. When he saw the large brown owl that flew in, he suddenly felt wide awake. It was Chester, Harry's owl.

_He's back, he must have gotten back last night. _Sirius guessed. He snatched the letter tied to the owl's leg, then told the owl, "The treats are on the kitchen table, hep youself." Hooting his thanks, Chester flew into the kitchen room

Tearing open the sealed parchment, he eagerly read the note.

_Hello Padfoot!_

_Sorry I've not been in touch the past couple of weeks- we just got back from the South of France. It was all so last minute that I completely forgot that I hadn't told you. Sorry about that! Anyway, we got back last night, and I have NEWS! I have to tell you in person. I'm not free tomorrow, but I'm working the evening shift on Tuesday. Can I come and see you Tuesday morning? Let me know- I'm dying to tell you my news!_

_Harry_

_P.S. Ron and Ginny want to come too- is that ok?_

Sirius stared at the note for some time, torn. Part of him was overjoyed that the first thing his godson, _James' boy_, wanted to do on his return was share his news with his godfather. The rest of him, however, was seething with fury at what those three had done to Hermione. They had broken her and trampled her into the ground. She had sacrificed _everything_ for them and they had not repaid that sacrifice in kind. Now she was on the verge of stepping onto a deadly path- and they bore a huge share of the blame for putting her there!

He loved Harry dearly and that would never change; that boy was like a son to him. But Harry had done a terrible wrong and hurt someone very special beyond imagining. Sirius would not be silent- Harry would listen, and bloody listen well.

Oh yes, he would see those three on Tuesday- it was time they learned the consequences of their actions.

Not bothering to dress, he raced to the Floo. He had to call Moony.


	8. Chapter 8: Truth and Lies

_****__Disclaimer: only the plot is mine. All else to JKR._

_A/N: Well, here we have the next chapter. Apologies that it took so long, but it was a VERY difficult chapter to write, not to mention long. As it was too long to fit into one chapter, I've split it into two- ch8 and ch9, both of which should be posted and available. I won't tell you if the confrontation scene is in ch8 or ch9- that way you have to read to it to find out! Mwahahaaa. I hope you like these two chapters! Thanks to all the lovely people who left reviews! Keep reading and reviewing!_

* * *

_Hermione's Flat, Roma: 8:00am, Local Time_

Hermione stamped the seal bearing her initials into the red molten wax and then cast a cooling charm. She would visit the magical post office later this morning to send her letter to James Grafton. She had filled the missive with descriptions of her apartment (along with a photo), the wonderful location and décor of the _Ministero_, her surprise at the new portkey creation process and the fact that Britain had not yet purchased or implemented it. Perhaps James would be able to persuade the Head of the Department of Magical Transportation to purchase the process- it was embarrassing how far Britain trailed behind the rest of the world. She had even thrown in a paragraph about the house elves and their equal status- if it reached the right ears, perhaps someone might begin to reconsider the situation in Britain….._Still pushing SPEW, eh Hermione?,_ she smirked._ Some things never change._ However, that could easily lead to a painful stroll down memory lane, so she quashed that line of thought.

She stood up, stretched, and strolled out of her study, leaving the letter on her desk. It was time for a bath, and then perhaps she would take her book and visit her 'spot' in the Borghese gardens- a secluded alcove between two trees that faced out onto the Alpine Monument. She would read for a few hours and then visit the _Galleria Borghese_ after lunch. Hermione couldn't help smiling in anticipation- she was finally going to see the fabled _Galleria_. It might not mean much to most people, but to Hermione Granger, it was a dream come true. Her smiled faltered a little. If only she had someone to share it with. Shaking herself out of her reverie, she gathered her things and went to take her shower.

* * *

_Sirius Black's Flat: London: 11:00am Local Time_

Sirius sat in the high back leather chair, deep in thought and drumming his fingers on the large, leather topped, antique walnut desk. He often came into his study to think, even when not actually working. There was something about the room that was conducive to clear thought- perhaps it was the scent of the leather furniture, or perhaps it was the particular photographs that lined his desk and the walls. Hell, perhaps it was purely psychological- perhaps he could think in here because he _told_ himself he could think in here. Irrespective, his study was the only place in his flat where he could think- and Sirius Black had a lot to think about.

He thought first of Hermione. It was hardly surprising that she should be first in his thoughts, because, truth be told, she always was. He wondered for a moment whether that was odd- should not Lira, the woman he was courting, the woman he hoped to one day marry and raise a family with, be foremost in his thoughts? But then, how could she be? With everything Hermione had done for him, for his godson and his best friend, for the whole of magical Britain, with everything she was to him, she could never come anything other than first. Hermione was everything. He paused. Surely that was not normal when in a relationship with someone else? Then he shrugged. His relationship with Hermione was anything _but_ normal, therefore it could only be expected that its impact would be just as abnormal. There was no other reason why Hermione featured so heavily in his thoughts. Yes, that was it.

Having solved that dilemma to his satisfaction, he returned to the matter at hand- Hermione. He was very anxious for her, and was worried that, without someone watching her, she might decide not to eat at all.

_Why is she so determined to get rid of those luscious curves of hers? _He frowned_. They're perfect just the way they are. Just as delicious as the rest of her_…..He blinked. _Where did that come from?_ He wondered. Well, no matter- she _did_ have a lovely figure and he was sure that she would shroud it in baggy clothes again today. How could she hate herself so? How could she look in the mirror and see something so far removed from what she really was? His heart ached to think of the burden she carried; he knew from personal experience that guilt and self-loathing could do more damage to one's insides that a stomach slashing hex.

He tried to focus on the fact that he would speak to her later today to confirm the Italian lesson for tomorrow evening, and that he himself would be there to ensure she ate, but it brought him small comfort. His Mione was hurting and there was very little he could do to stop it; that did not sit well with him. Sirius was a man of action, and slow to give his trust. To those who had his trust, however, he was fiercely loyal and devoted: he would do whatever it took to protect them. Mione most certainly belonged in that category. As did Remus of course, and Tonks and Teddy. Harry too- despite the fact that he was angry with the boy, he loved him nonetheless. For those people he would do anything and everything. Which is why on Tuesday morning, he would fight on Hermione's behalf. He would _make _them see and acknowledge the wrong they had done her and the debt they owed her.

He would make them see how loyal, how kind, how intelligent and _beautiful _she was. But most importantly, he would make them see what they had done to her. He growled, thinking of the pain she carried daily, thinking it no more than her due because of the actions of careless individuals. She was family. Hell, even Moony's _wolf_ had accepted her as pack!

He smiled in spite of himself, thinking of Moony and Tonks' response to his Floo call this morning, informing them that Harry and the others would be visiting on Tuesday. They had been so preoccupied with owling Andromeda to ask that she pick up Teddy on Monday evening, owling the Ministry to ensure they were both given Tuesday morning off work, and planning what they would say to the three that they had waited until the end of the Floo call before they asked the all important question; "Sirius, why are you naked?"

He had merely winked and withdrawn from the fire, neglecting to mention that he had been in bed when Chester had arrived and that he was, in fact, clad in boxers. He did so enjoy riling Moony.

Sirius' smile faded as his thoughts focused on another person- Lira. Her situation puzzled him immensely. Reasonably speaking, he should have been head over heels in love with her. She was intelligent, beautiful, kind and understanding, came from a good family and worked in a compassionate profession. It was too early to say, however, he was almost certain she would be a good person to start a family with.

Sirius frowned. _But why do I have this uneasy feeling in my gut when I think of her, lately? Could I still be holding a grudge from that silly little tiff we had? No, I'm not that juvenile._ But still, there was something he couldn't quite put his finger on….

He shook his head._ Get a grip, _he berated himself. _She's everything a man could want, and you're not twenty five years old anymore! This isn't some silly fairy-tale- this could be your last chance at a family! You'll learn to love her._ _Bloody well act your age!_

Keeping that thought firmly in mind, he walked to the Floo to call Lira's favourite restaurant. This time he was even fully clothed, he chortled to himself. He would have paid good money to see the Henri's (the Maitre'd at _La Flamboise_) face if he thought Sirius was flooing naked. Although, come to think of it, he would probably make the booking irrespective- money talked, and Sirius was old money. God knew enough women had chased him for just that reason in the past. The thought deflated him for a moment, then he took hold of himself and reached for the Floo powder. He had plans to make.

* * *

_The Borghese Gardens, Roma: 12:50 pm, local time_

Hermione shrunk her book, placed it in her bag and stood up, stretching. Her stomach rumbled and she wished, not for the first time that day, that she could have eaten a more substantial lunch- half a small bowl of three-bean salad would hardly be considered filling by most people. _But then, _she reminded herself_, you're not most people. You are severely overweight and need to follow a strict diet or else you'll keep gaining weight._ She sighed and tried to focus on something other than the hole that seemed to have taken up residence in her stomach.

Smoothing out her long, black gypsy skirt and loose, pale green T-shirt, she pulled on her black cardigan, despite the heat. She wished her arms weren't quite so hideous- they seemed to be getting flabbier by the day. Ah well, there was nothing to be gained by wishing, she reminded herself. Casting a quick cleaning spell at the chequered picnic blanket, she shrunk it and placed it in her handbag. She then removed the Notice-Me-Not-Charm she had placed on 'her spot', and strolled towards the _Villa Borghese_. She hoped to buy a ticket for the one o'clock session, at the _Galleria_ - as each session lasted two hours.

As she neared the enormous Manor, she spotted a familiar face, beaming at her.

"Hermione! You have come to see the _Galleria?"_

She smiled at Enrico, even whilst ensuring her jacket obscured at least part of her somewhat overly round figure. "Yes, I have. I am surprised to see you here! Have you come to visit the _Galleria_ too?"

The handsome old man shook his head, dark eyes sparkling with mirth. "No, I am here with _la mia familgia_. We have the, how you say….picnic? Yes, we have the picnic since the weather, it is so good. You must come and meet my wife! My sons, they are here too with their wives, and my granddaughter is about your age. I also have the grandson, Giorgio. He is very good looking, like his _Nonno_," he winked.

She smiled nervously at him. "Oh, that's so kind of you, Enrico, but I really couldn't disrupt your picnic. Besides, I was hoping to make it in time for the one o clock session at the _Galleria_….."

The old man nodded in understanding. "Ah, of course. Another time, eh?, My family, they are eager to meet you. But today, you fulfill your dream of seeing the _Galleria_. It is good to see you take time to relax, _piccola_. You work very hard." Then he frowned at her. "But I think you need to eat more, no? You are becoming thinner."

She smiled politely, whilst cringing inside. _Thinner, oh, if only that were true! Enrico, you are a dear to try and make me feel better, but I know the truth. You don't need to flatter me._

" Oh, don't worry, I eat enough. It's just the clothes, you see. They are very loose. Anyway, I am keeping you from your family, and I ought to go and purchase my ticket. Thank you for the invitation, Enrico, and I look forward to meeting your family another time."

He looked hard at her for a moment, as if searching her face for something, then smiled. "Of course, _piccola_, you go now and enjoy yourself. You tell me what you think of the _Galleria_ at work tomorrow, eh?"

She nodded at him, smiling and, bidding him goodbye, began to walk towards the Manor where she proceeded to buy a ticket. She was so intent on searching her purse for the correct amount of Euros, she did not see the handsome man who stood watching her from a distance, nor did she see him make his way quickly to her side. She turned from the counter and ran straight into a wall of hard flesh. She stepped back, gasping. "Oh, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to walk into you. Please excuse me." She activated the latent spell, which immediately translated her words into rather comically English-accented Italian. She looked up at the man she had run into. He was a tall, handsome, man with perfectly styled blond hair, pale blue eyes and a buff, well-muscled figure, looking as though he was in his early thirties. He was immaculately dressed in a red polo shirt and light tan trousers. They were expensive, Hermione noted, spying the _Armani_ label on the shirt.

He smiled at her, and she noticed that he had very even, white teeth. "It is nothing, _signorina_." He replied in flawless, albeit Italian accented English. "It is my mistake that I stood so close behind you. But it is always a happy mistake to run into a beautiful woman, no?"

Hermione blushed and cast her eyes down briefly. "You are very kind, _Signore_…?"

He bowed slightly." Emilio Rosso. I am very pleased to meet you _Singorina_ -?" It was his turn to pause and ask for her name.

Hermione blushed again at his bright smile. "I am Hermione Granger. Pleased to make your acquaintance _Signore_ Rosso."

Emilio took her hand brushed his lips over her knuckles. "Please, call me Emilio. And I will call you Hermione, if I may?" At her nod, he smiled again, dazzling her.

"Thank you Hermione. Now that we are introduced, perhaps you will permit to me escort you through the _Galleria_? It would give me great pleasure to show you some of the treasures in this wonderful place."

Hermione was so shocked at this offer, she could hardly respond._ What on earth do I say to him?_ She agonised. _What _do_ people tell handsome Italian men who want to show them around art galleries? _

Taking hold of herself, she quietly replied. "It is very kind of you to offer, but I do not wish to impose on your kindness."

The blond haired Adonis waved his hand dismissively. "Imposition? Not at all, Hermione. It would be my pleasure to share with you the beauty of the past whilst basking in the glow of _your_ beauty."

Feeling almost sick at this undeserved praise, she was about to refuse. However, a voice in her head screamed that handsome men asking to accompany her to art galleries was not a common occurrence, and that she should take advantage of the opportunity. _After all_, she noted, _I'm hardly likely to see him again after today- why shouldn't I enjoy some time with a handsome man without worrying about embarrassing myself? And it's perfectly safe- we're in public after all!_

Making up her mind, she cast a shy smile at the waiting Emilio and nodded. "If you are certain, then I accept with pleasure. It would be lovely to have someone to show me around instead of bumbling around on my own."

Flashing his even white teeth in a dazzling smile, he took her arm with old-fashioned courtesy and proceeded to direct her through the gallery. "And it will be my absolute pleasure to show you these treasures, Hermione."

"The pleasure is all mine," she said shyly.

_"Grazie, _Hermione. Excuse me, I do not wish to seem rude, but your friends, they are not here? I do not understand why they leave such a beautiful woman to wonder the gallery alone."

She blushed. "I came alone- I don't really know very many people in Rome. I recently moved here from London."

"Ah, I see. Well, now you know me, eh? I would like very much to be friends. Would you like this?"

She nodded shyly, unable to believe this handsome man wanted anything to do with her.

"_Bene_, I am glad. Ah, now, here we have the famous painting of _Sancto_ _Girolamo_, by the great Carravaggio."

Hermione stood, gazing in awe at the legendary painting, depicting a thin, seemingly frail and aged St Jerome, writing at his table, with his oft' depicted human skull sitting before him.

She could not speak, for a time. She was simply struck with the beauty of the painting and the many messages it conveyed. It spoke of death and human mortality, but also of life, of decay and of holiness; it said so much. She looked searchingly at the painting, trying to absorb every line, every nuance and burn it into her memory.

She had forgotten that she was not alone until a voice behind her said, "I think you like this painting, no? Old _Sancto Girolamo_, he appeals to you."

She blushed, embarrassed that she had momentarily forgotten that he was there. She replied without taking her eyes from the painting. "I first saw a copy of this painting when I was five years old. It hung in my grandmother's living room, and I was fascinated by it as a child. I swore then that one day, I would see the real painting. Now that I am standing in front of it, I cannot believe how marvellous it is. No print could ever do it justice. The painting _speaks_, Emilio, and it has so much to say…."

She shook her head, thinking how silly she must sound, and turned to the handsome blond man who waited patiently for her.

He smiled at her, a smile which, for some reason, did not seem to reach his icy blue eyes. "You feel things deeply, I think. Your love of art shows you have a real passion inside you."

Taking her arm, he walked her to the next painting. "This is the famous _A_ _deposiçã_, by Raphael. It was painted in approximately 1507….."

As Emilio explained the history of the painting, Hermione slowly began to relax. Whatever the reason for his inexplicable interest in her, it did not stop her enjoying his obvious knowledge of this place and its wonderful treasures.

They toured the gallery for the full two hours, enjoying the various paintings and sculptures housed in the grand mansion. Hermione found Emilio to be an excellent guide and conversationalist, being both knowledgeable and amusing. She found herself thoroughly enjoying his company.

As they were leaving the building, Emilio turned to Hermione. "I have enjoyed myself very much, Hermione. Perhaps you will consent to share coffee with me?" Seeing her uncertain expression, he hastily added, "In the _Piazza Del Popolo_, of course. I understand that you do no yet know me and would be uncertain of the wisdom of leaving this area with a stranger. We will of course walk in full view of the public."

Looking forward to the prospect of more interesting conversation, and forcing herself to ignore the nerves churning in her stomach, she nodded.

"Yes, thank you, that sounds lovely."

With a charming smile he replied, "_Bene_, I know just the place. Taking her arm once more, he guided her through the well worn public paths of the Borghese Gardens, asking her about her artistic preferences. She thoroughly enjoyed the conversation as they meandered through the picturesque garden. In fact, she was so preoccupied with their conversation that she hardly noticed when they had left the Borghese gardens.

Before she knew it, fifteen minutes had elapsed and they were now standing in front of a café by the name of _Canova_, on the outer edge of the _Piazza del Popolo_. The outer exterior looked very modern and chic, and, if she were to be completely honest, not the type of café she had expected him to take her to. She had expected something small, out of the way and quaintly traditional. _Perhaps most other places are still closed for the siesta period_, she thought with a quick glance at her watch. It was almost three thirty, so it was quite likely. Irrespective, it didn't matter. A handsome young man had asked her to share coffee in Rome, and Hermione intended to enjoy it. It didn't matter that he could not possibly have any interest in her whatsoever, she intended to enjoy the experience of being asked to go _anywhere_ by a man. The last proper date she had had was when Viktor had asked her to the Yule Ball in fourth year, unless she counted that disastrous evening at Slughorn's Christmas Party with Cormac McLaggen, octopus extraordinaire. Hermione shuddered at the memory. _If nothing else,_ she thought, _it's a memory worth having that a handsome man asked me to accompany him once._

A waiter greeted them in Italian and led them to a table facing the square. Hermione declined anything to eat and ordered an _Espresso_, whilst Emilio ordered a _latte_ and _biscotti_. She sat back as she watched the waiter collect the menus, and smiled at her companion. She intended to enjoy this experience.

* * *

_Sirius Black's apartment, London: 5:30pm Local Time_

Sirius revised his list, carefully ensuring that each item had been crossed off: _Restaurant, check. Champagne, check. Flowers, check_. _Chocolate, check_. Satisfied, he folded the list and slipped it into his pocket. He wanted tonight to be perfect for Lira, and intended to surprise her with flowers and chocolate at the hospital before whisking her off to dinner at her favourite restaurant. He wanted to show her that he took the relationship seriously and was willing to put in the effort to make it work- and that he appreciated her.

He deliberately ignored the small voice in his mind who pointed out that Lira didn't seem to think their relationship deserved the same effort. _She just works hard, that's all, _he told himself. _We're adults with responsibilities and jobs, not teenage kids who expect the world to revolve around each other to the exclusion of all else._ He also ignored the fact that he had failed to convince even himself with this argument and focused on the next task at hand- Hermione.

On checking his watch, he found it was six-thirty, which meant it was seven-thirty in Rome. _She should be home by now,_ he thought. He knew that Hermione did not tend to stay out late on Sunday evenings, as she preferred to be well rested for work the next day.

Grabbing a handful of floo powder, he tossed it into the fireplace and called, "Hermione's flat, Roma!", then knelt and pushed his head into the fireplace. The world seemed to twist and turn for several long moments, before he found himself looking at Hermione's living room. She was curled up on the couch, reading. He smiled at the sight, loving the peaceful expression on her face as she read.

He cleared his throat to catch her attention. She jumped, and looked around the room for the source of the noise. Spotting Sirius, she smiled and closed her book.

"Sirius! I wasn't expecting you to call so soon!"

He feigned a hurt expression and held a hand to his forehead. "Oh, you cruel woman, you wound me to the heart. I missed you _so_ terribly that I had to see you immediately, and you, Madam, thank me by plunging a knife into my poor heart! Oh, woe is me!"

Hermione giggled as she slid off the couch and came over to kneel in front of the fireplace. "You silly man, I just meant that I was surprised since we only saw one another yesterday! I thought you'd call in a day or two."

Sirius smiled, dropping the theatrics. "You know I can't stay away from you, love. You look happy, I'm glad to see. Nice day?"

"Oh yes, I had a lovely morning reading in the Borghese Gardens, and a little picnic lunch." Her face darkened momentarily, as the mention of food reminded her how hungry she was, but she pushed on. "Then I visited the _Galleria Borghese_, and oh, it was just marvellous! I could have stayed in there forever, surrounded by those works of sheer beauty. I was so lucky that Emilio accompanied me, he was so knowledgeable!"

Sirius felt an unfamiliar churning in his gut. "Emilio? Is that a friend of yours?"

Hermione beamed. "Oh, he's a lovely man whom I ran into at the ticket desk- literally. I walked straight into him. He was so very kind, and immediately offered to show me through the Gallery when he learned I was alone."

Sirius frowned. Who was this man? What did he want with Mione? Did she like him? Did she intend to see him again? Despite being mildly surprised at all of the questions suddenly running through his head, Sirius forced himself to smile at the girl in front of him. "He just ran into you at the ticket desk and showed you around? That was nice of him. Did you get to learn much about him?"

"Well, in the Gallery we mainly talked about the paintings and sculptures, but I did learn that he was originally from Milan but now lives in Rome. I learned more about him over coffee afterwards."

Sirius felt the churning intensify. "He took you for coffee afterwards? Mione, was that a good idea with someone you've just met? He could be anybody!"

She smiled. "Don't worry, he took me to a lovely café in the _Piazza Del Popolo_. There were people everywhere and I refused his offer to walk me home afterwards. I said I had shopping to do, and once he had left I apparated home."

Sirius sighed with relief, then grinned sheepishly. " Sorry Mione, I just worry about you. I don't want you to get hurt, and some men are only interested in one thing."

Hermione's smile this time was a little bitter. "I know what you're thinking, Sirius, and you have nothing to worry about. He's not interested in me that way. He's just being polite, and he appreciates the fact that we both have interests in common, that's all. He's taking me to lunch tomorrow at a café near the _Ministero._"

Sirius stomach now felt as though a cauldron had been lit inside. "You're seeing him again? Well, I hope you enjoy it love. So he's a muggle, then?"

She nodded. "Yes, I think so. He blends very well into muggle world, and I was in a muggle building, after all. Besides which, he said he works for the government and I'm almost certain he doesn't work for the Ministero. Not that it matters- I'm hardly likely to marry the man, so muggle or wizard, it's much of a muchness, I won't need to tell him I'm a witch.

Sirius smiled, whilst inside his mind was whirling once again. _Damn right she won't be marrying him! This character had better keep his hands off my Mione!_ _I swear, if he touches her I'll break his fingers off one by one_! He growled to himself, and then blinked. Where on earth had _that_ come from? Why was he being so overprotective, so…possessive? He wasn't….he _couldn't _be jealous! _I just care about her and don't want to see her taken advantage of by some lothario, that's all._ He told himself. Yes, that was it.

Forcing his mind back to the reason he was calling, he gathered his thoughts. Mione. He was calling to help Mione. He took a deep breath, and hoped this would work out.

"Mione, love, you remember I offered to give you Italian lessons?"

She nodded. "Yes, although you don't have to if you can't-" He cut her off before she could continue.

"Love, of course I can. I was calling to ask if you would like to start lessons tomorrow night?"

Hermione's smile lit up her face. "Really? Oh, Sirius, I would love to! But I meant what I said- you must let me cook you dinner! It's the least I can do."

Relieved that the first part of "the plan" seemed to be going smoothly, he grinned. "Dinner with my Mione- what a glorious evening awaits this humble teacher! Would six-thirty your time be acceptable to the divine Miss Mione? We could have the lesson first and then relax over dinner."

Hermione felt her heart catch at his devilish grin. _That smile should be illegal_, she thought, smiling back. _It gets to me every time_.

"That sounds perfect, Sirius."

"Excellent! Then six-thirty it is! I've got to dash, love, so I shall see you tomorrow, Mione!" With a wink, he pulled his head out of the fireplace.

Standing up and casting a cleaning charm on himself, he pulled on a black robe over his black suit. Taking up the flowers and chocolate laying on the coffee table, he shrunk them and placed them carefully into a box in his pocket. He then apparated to St Mungo's. It was time to surprise Lira.

Arriving in a corridor a little way down from the Spell Damage Ward, he disillusioned himself. Satisfied that he could no longer be seen, he walked quietly to the ward, and, tiptoeing to the staffroom, waited patiently for a staff member so he could slip in behind them, as the hospital used _very_ secure locking charms.

Fortunately, he didn't have to wait long. A middle aged, matronly seeming woman, with steel grey hair gathered in a bun, trudged wearily down the corridor, and waved her wand at the door to enter the staffroom. He quickly followed her inside and stood unobtrusively in a corner, not daring to make any noise that could alert her to his presence. The woman quickly made herself a cup of tea and sat quietly on one of the wooden chairs surrounding the table for a few moments, seemingly enjoying the peace and solitude.

About five minutes later, she sighed and stood up, before vanishing her cup. She then straightened her uniform and walked out of the room.

Once he heard the door lock behind her, Sirius relaxed. He knew Lira would arrive at any moment, as she finished her shift at six o clock. She always came here to have a cup of tea before leaving. She told him once that it helped her to unwind before going home.

Hearing voices from outside the door, he tensed. Sure enough, the door swung open and two people strolled in, a man and a woman. He recognised the lanky, balding man as Gerald Long, Head of the Hospital Grants Committee. The woman, he noted with a smile, was Lira. Perfect. _If only Long would hurry up and get out of here, _he sighed impatiently. However, his curiosity was peaked when Long cast privacy wards on the room.

"We must be quick, Lira- we have only a few minutes at most before someone tries to enter the room. Now, tell me, how goes your research?"

Lira pursed her lips. "It has not been as successful as I had hoped. It seems the new potion is only successful in the early stages of tissue damage. It also causes extremely violent side effects: one in three subjects suffered from a destabilised magical core, whilst one in four subjects contracted numerous infections, and one in ten subjects died. The sample was a total of three hundred patients."

Long sighed, smoothing his navy blue robe. "That is unfortunate. I had hoped that the potion would prove to be more successful, as our… benefactors …..are hoping to market the potion in the next few months. However, with a little work, perhaps they could successfully market it in the coming year. Should they wish to make another…..donation….will you be able to find sufficient appropriate subjects to test it on?"

Lira tilted her head consideringly. "Over how long a period?"

Long thought for a moment. "Shall we say six months?"

She nodded. "Yes, I should say that would provide sufficient time to find the right subjects. I can depend on you to alter the records?"

Her question sent a chill through Sirius. _Alter records? What records? What is going on here? _

Long nodded. "Of course. I shudder to think of what would occur if the Board of Governors discovered our experiment." He sighed. "Not that it matters, really- we only use mudbloods. A few more, or a few less, what difference does it make?"

Sirius stared. What the devil was Lira doing getting mixed up with a beast like this? He was so shocked, he almost missed Lira's reply.

"Yes, well, unfortunately, the Board of Governors doesn't see it that way, nor does the Ministry. What else do you expect when the Minister for Magic himself is a blood traitor! He was one of Dumbledore's followers- he actually champions equal rights for mudbloods and half-breeds!"

Sirius felt as thought ice water had been poured down his back._ Blood traitor? Mudblood? _ _Oh Merlin, who IS this woman? _

Lira wasn't finished. "It was only three years ago that the Dark Lord was in power and I could openly run my experiments. Mudbloods, filthy muggles, half breeds, we could openly test our creations on any of them! Now we are reduced to altering records so that no one looks too closely at the fact that mudbloods die more often on my ward! The idea that we should be held accountable for every beast that dies here- what other use do they have but to die so that those of purer blood can live? We have to test the new potions on _somebody_!"

Long nodded, sighing. "Yes, and worse than that, the Board expects us to seek permission from every person before we use them in our study. Ask mudbloods for permission, indeed! What next?"

Lira smiled mirthlessly. The sight of that smile chilled Sirius to the bone.

"Well, they DO give permission. Nobody said it had to be willingly, though."

Long smirked. "It amuses me that those who are too weak to use _Imperio_ believe that we all suffer from the same compunctions."

He checked his watch and sighed. "I had better leave. We don't need anyone to become suspicious. However, I must ask, are you still seeing the blood traitor Black?"

Lira nodded. "As much as it disgusts me to admit it, yes."

Sirius was numb. His mind could no longer deal with what he was hearing, and so had retreated behind his auror persona. Nothing mattered except the facts. He needed to glean as much as he could and get out of that room alive. Losing his cool was not an option.

"I know it is…distasteful, my dear, however, you need only play the part for another six months or so. Once the final trials for the _Sanguis_ potion have been completed, it ought to be safe for you to end your association with him. After all, associating with a known blood traitor puts you completely above suspicion should any trouble arise. Besides, as an additional benefit the funding committee will continue to be generous with your department as long as you are…associated with the so called Lord Black. How it galls me that the Lordship of that noble House falls to that worthless blood traitor! But I digress. Gregory understands your situation and will continue to keep your…association quiet until such time as he can announce your engagement publically. Contrary to popular opinion, my nephew can be a very patient man when the need arises."

Lira smiled. "I'm meeting him now, actually, so you had better leave quickly- I want a few minutes alone with my fiancé!"

Sirius waited with baited breath; he knew this was his chance to escape without their knowing he had overheard their conversation.

The sound of the door unlocking galvanised Sirius into action. He silently cast a _mufflatio_ charm on himself and followed Long out of the door. He waited until the older man was out of sight, and then made his way to an empty corridor a little way from the staffroom. He cast a slilent notice-me-not charm and leaned his head against the wall. He simply could not believe what he had heard.

Lira- who the hell was she? He could say with absolute certainty that the woman in that room was a complete stranger. The Lira _he_ had known was a compassionate woman, a healer, a decent and kind person who genuinely cared for him. Evidently that woman did not exist. The real Lira was experimenting on muggleborns with untested potions and couldn't care less what it did to them! She had been casting the imperious on them to force their consent to the experiment! She was a bigot, a pureblooded bigot in every sense of the word. She had spoken with longing of Voldemort's reign of terror! As if that weren't bad enough, she was _engaged_. She had merely been using Sirius as a cover, a decoy.

His world had been turned upside down in a matter of minutes. One thing was clear though- he wanted nothing further to do with that creature masquerading as a human. Even the sight of her would be enough to turn his stomach.

_And that's a bloody problem I could do without, _he sighed to himself. How could he explain his sudden desire to end the relationship without revealing the reason for his sudden disgust for her? She would want an explanation, especially if she needed him as a cover for her nefarious activities. He shuddered. _Come on, pull yourself together_, he berated himself. _This is just like any other case- you obtained the information, now you have to find a means of withdrawing without tipping your hand._

Sirius frowned. He knew if she so much as _suspected_ he had overheard her discussion with Long, he was a dead man. Investigating illegal potions testing was far, far worse than dealing with ordinary crimes. That was largely because the large companies had enough money to bury their guilt- and anyone who knew about it. Merlin knew he saw that often enough at the DMLE. He had to find a way to end it with Lira without arousing her suspicions, and he had to find a way to pass his knowledge to the right people. They had to stop this before any muggleborns were subjected to further 'trials'. He shuddered. _That could easily have been Mione._

Pulling his mind from that terrifying line of thought, he forced himself to focus._ Think through the facts you have, _he coached himself. _She is close to Long. He approves of the experiments and helps her to cover her tracks. She is a pureblood with extreme prejudices. She experiments on muggleborns. She is engaged to Long's nephew. _

Sirius paused, and then narrowed his eyes. _Engaged. And she's meeting him here. Soon. If I were to 'catch' them together, it would give me the perfect justification to end this without any suspicion on her part. _

He considered the idea. As a plan, it was weak, but he didn't have much time before the fiancée showed up. Unable to come up with a better idea, he decided to go with what he had. He removed the flowers and chocolate from the box in his pocket, then resized and disillusioned them- they would help him to look the part of the injured boyfriend and draw her thoughts away from anything else. _Ironic, _he thought grimly, _because until just a few moments ago, I WAS the injured boyfriend._

He removed the notice-me-not charm from the corridor, and, checking that he was still disillusioned and silent, moved to a place little way from the staffroom door, waiting. Sure enough, about five minutes later, he spied a tall blond man strutting down the corridor. He was very…pretty, Sirius thought. _The perfect blond pureblood prince,_ he growled to himself. It didn't matter- he didn't know this woman, and she could do whatever the hell she wanted with whomever the hell she wanted. As far as he was concerned, this Gregory had done him a favour.

The man knocked on the door three times and waited for it to open. Sirius lined himself up carefully behind the man- Gregory- he reminded himself. When the door opened almost immediately, he ambled in with Sirius close behind him. As soon as the door closed with a 'click', Lira cast an additional locking charm and threw herself at the man, kissing him for all she was worth. Sirius quickly removed the _mufflatio_ and disillusionment spells, then drew in a deep breath. _Show time_, he thought.

"Lira! WHAT IS GOING ON HERE?"

The couple sprang apart, shocked. Lira, seeing Sirius standing with a shocked expression on his face, flowers and chocolate in hand, immediately began to try to perform some damage control. She shouted at Gregory, who seemed to understand what was required of him and stood silently.

"How dare you accost me like that? Don't touch me, you animal!"

She turned to Sirius. "Sirius, _he_ kissed _me_! I don't even know him, I would never-"

Sirius cut her off. "Careful or you might choke on your lies, Lira. I was here from the moment he walked in- I was right behind him. You threw yourself at him and kissed _him._"

Lira flushed. She knew she had been caught.

Sirius did not have to feign the disgust in his voice. "How long has this been going on?"

"This is the first time-"

He cut her off again, his face set and his tone deadly quiet. "I know what I saw. That was not a first kiss. Know this, Lira, however you respond it's over between us. So I will only ask you once more. How. Long. Has. This. Been. Going. ON?"

Lira paled at the look on his face; apparently she was afraid at the prospect of facing the fabled Black fury. "I….it…Over a year." She whispered, choosing the least damaging answer she could give. He noticed she didn't mention the engagement.

Sirius fixed her with his steely-eyed gaze. "I won't even ask why, because quite frankly, I don't give a damn. As of this moment, you are no longer welcome in my home, or any property I own. The wards will be changed immediately."

Lira blanched. "Sirius, please, give me another chance. I made a mistake, I won't do it again!"

_What's the matter, scared your funding will dry up? _ He thought bitterly. _Or are you scared of losing your blood traitor poster boy when the shit hits the fan? And hit the fan it will, Lira. You will learn just what this blood traitor is capable of._

Aloud, he laughed bitterly. "Save it, Lira. I don't believe that for a second. From what you've just told me, you were with him even before you met me! Why should I trust you now? You should know me well enough to know that I despise liars. You've made your choice- now live with it."

With a final look of disgust that was not feigned in the slightest, he flung the chocolate and flowers on the floor, then turned on the spot and apparated home. He immediately cancelled her apparition, entry and floo access. As an afterthought, he added a few more security wards to his flat. Anyone attempting to gain access to his flat without permission would find themselves wondering around the other side of London. Thankfully he had not given her access to any of his other properties apart from Black Island- and he had removed her from those wards when she had refused to accept the portkey. Summoning the box containing her ring, he deactivated the portkey, and then vanished the ring into thin air- he did not want to see it again.

That done, he apparated to the Lupins'. He needed help, and it looked like it was going to be a _very_ long night. Sirius groaned. He had to work tomorrow. _God, what a day_, he thought tiredly.

* * *

_Hermione's Flat, Roma: 8:00am, Local Time_

Hermione emerged from the bathroom and walked to her bedroom to find something to wear. She couldn't help but wish she were slim enough to wear something sexy, like the fitted skirts and suit dresses other women wore. She wanted to look nice for her lunch with Emilio. True, it wasn't a date, but it was as close to one as she was going to get. Sorting through her usual work attire, she selected a black pantsuit and a white blouse. She kept the matching black robe in her office, and would don it on arrival. _Not exactly the stuff dreams are made of,_ she thought, looking at the ordinary clothes.

Pulling off her bathrobe, she frowned at her reflection. She had been dieting and exercising for almost two weeks and still she continued to gain was wrong with her? Shaking her head ruefully, she dressed. All she could see were flaws, imperfections. _Stop it,_ she chided herself. _I will maintain this blasted diet until the fat stops piling on. _

Turning away from her mirror, she adjusted her trousers. Her clothes seemed to have stretched- she was certain they had not been quite so loose when she last wore this suit a few weeks ago. _Obviously it was made from cheap material. I'll have to ask Cecilia where to buy some good quality clothes in Rome. _

However, she didn't have time to change, she didn't even have time for breakfast, for that matter. She had a meeting in precisely ten minutes with Enrico, followed by a meeting with her team. She could always have a quick coffee at the _Ministero..._. Shrugging her shoulders, she cast a cleaning charm on her teeth and apparated directly to her office. Missing one breakfast wouldn't kill her- it might even do some good.

* * *

_Sirius' Office, Ministry of Magic, London: 11:00am local time_

Sirius conjured yet another cup of coffee and drank it down quickly. Three cups of coffee had done little to dispel the effects of a poor night's sleep, or the weariness that seemed to have settled deep into his bones.

He rubbed at his eyes tiredly, looking down at the parchments on his desk. They were all starting to blur together. He yawned, and sat back in his chair, closing his eyes for a moment as he went over the events of the night before.

_He had gone to see Moony and Tonks to ask for their help with the Lira situation. They had been shocked beyond belief at what he had told them. Though the Lupins had apparently guessed that Sirius and Lira would end their relationship sooner rather than later -although they refused to tell him why- neither could possibly have foreseen it happening in quite that manner. Hell, he had trouble believing it himself. Pureblood supremacists and dark wizards would always exist, true enough, but he had hardly expected to find himself in the middle of one of their conspiracies! _

_They had talked for hours last night, examining idea after idea, but it always came back to the same issue: even if they were to send Sirius' memory to the Head of the DMLE anonymously, it would be far too easy for Long and Lira to piece together whose memory it was- after all, Sirius had been in that same room, apparently unseen, not ten minutes later. However, without the memory, they had no proof, merely unfounded suspicions. Finally, Sirius had had an idea. _

_He had summed in up in one word; "Malfoy." _

_Tonks, tired, frustrated and worried, had predictably reacted in her usual eloquent manner. _

_"What? What the bloody hell does Malfoy have to do with anything?"_

_Sirius had grinned slyly. "Don't you see, Malfoy is the answer. Draco Malfoy, like his father before him, is a complete and utter arsehole. However, __**unlike**__ our dear old Lucius, Draco is fanatical about staying on the right side of the law. I think the little darling has nightmares of being carted away to Azkaban like daddy dearest. In fact, I'd bet good money that it's not one of his firms behind this. But he's still a Slytherin through and through- ambitious and cunning and wants to be on top."_

_Tonks had scowled. "So?"_

_"So, Tonks, what would happen if Malfoy got word that one of his competitors in the potions industry was using muggleborns as guinea pigs? And worse, that some of them were dying? AND that senior staff at the Hospital had been perpetrating said acts and covering them up?"_

_Understanding had dawned in Remus' eyes. "He'd send a platoon of top investigators to uncover each and every secret in that hospital until he had found out exactly what was going on. And with the resources available to him, it would be probably take no more than a week to get sufficient proof - after all, we already know who's doing it. All we need is proof. Any decent investigator won't have any trouble with that- and you can be sure Malfoy will hire the best." _

_Sirius had beamed. "Exactly. And once he has proof, you can bet your last galleon that he'll play dirty- he'll take it to the DMLE, but he'll send copies directly to the Wizenagamot and the Daily Profit as well- he'll completely smear them. He benefits quite a bit if this as yet unknown company bites the dust - it increases his hold on the market a hundred fold!"_

_Tonks' eyes had darkened again. "But what about the muggleborns who are admitted to the Spell Damage Ward in the meantime? We can't just leave them to be used and killed until Malfoy gets his proof."_

_Sirius had nodded. "You're right, we can't. And we won't. I think what we have here is little matter of __triggering the right thoughts__. Right, Moony?"_

_The werewolf stared at him. "You can't be serious! You want to use THAT?"_

_Tonks stamped her foot in fury. "Use WHAT? Will someone please tell me what the hell the two of you are talking about?"_

_Sirius had grinned shamefacedly. "Well, it's a jinx we used at Hogwarts, you see. Once cast, every time Lira intends to administer an untested potion on a patient or intends to cast the imperious curse, she'll forget."_

_Tonks blinked. "Forget? But what if she remembers?"_

_Remus had shaken his head. "No Dora, you misunderstand. EVERY TIME she tries to do it for the next month, she will forget about it."_

_Tonks was awed. "I've never heard of this jinx! It's…it's brilliant!"_

_Sirius had bowed his head to hide the sudden moisture in his eyes. "Lily came up with it in fourth year. She was a real genius."_

Sighing, Sirius opened his eyes. They had already set the plan in motion and sent an anonymous note to one of Malfoy's private office, including the name of the _Sanguis_ potion. Tonks, disguised as an old man with blue eyes and long white hair, had strolled into St Mungo's and surreptitiously cast the jinx on Lira as Sirius had taught her. Now, they waited.

He still couldn't believe it had come to this- Lira had played him like a fool.

Standing, he began to pace across the marble floor. It wasn't that he was hurt because he was desperately in love with her- he wasn't. He was honest enough with himself to admit that. What bothered him was the fact that once again, he was left alone. For as long as he could remember, he had wanted a family of his own, and yet, he was the only Marauder now single. James had found Lily, he thought with a pang, and Moony had Tonks. He wanted someone of his own, to care for him and love him, and he for them.

Shaking his head, he sighed. He knew there were other women out there and that he still had time, but he had to face facts; it was only going to get harder as time wore on. _Still, better alone than to be with a creature like that, _He reminded himself.

Yawning yet again, Sirius shook his head and gathered his papers. Shuffling to the door, he poked his head outside. "Gladys, love, I think I might just call it a day. I'm bloody exhausted and I think I might be coming down with something."

The matronly woman who served as his secretary shooed him away. "Then go home and rest, young man." In spite of himself, he grinned. Despite his thirty-five years she could still make him feel like a schoolboy. "You go and get your beauty sleep- it'd be a real shame to spoil that pretty face of yours."

Sirius winked at her and strolled back into his office, then apparated home. He could use a nap.


	9. Chapter 9: Show me

**_Disclaimer: only the plot is mine. All else to JKR._**

_A/N: Here's the next part. Read the A/N at the end after you've read the chapter! Oh, and as a little addition, yes, George will arrive on scene soon, but not in this chapter. If you want to know what's going to happen ahead of time, please feel free to PM me and I'll tell you. Don't ask in reviews as I can't answer those. Thanks all! Hope you enjoy!  
_

* * *

_Piazza della Rotonda, Roma: 1:30pm Local Time_

Hermione stared in awe as she approached the Roman Pantheon. It was the stuff of which legends were made, a truly imposing structure. She wished had the time go inside and examine the beautiful interior….

"You are already in love with the Pantheon, too? I think I should be jealous, no?" A familiar voice laughed from behind her.

Hermione blushed, and turned towards Emilio, today dressed in a sharp pinstripe navy suit. _He looks so perfect, _she thought despairingly,_ not a hair out of place!_

Smiling politely, she extended her hand. "Hello, Emilio, I'm so pleased to see you again."

Emilio merely quirked a brow and pulled her close, kissing her on either cheek. "You British are very formal, are you not? Whilst we Italians will take any opportunity to kiss a pretty girl." He smiled at her, his perfect teeth gleaming in the sun.

She merely gave him a small smile as she adjusted her suit, which absolutely _refused_ to sit properly today.

"Shall we go? I must return to the office in an hour or so…" she trailed off, hoping she didn't sound rude.

He nodded," _Si_, we go. The restaurant is not far. " And it wasn't. He guided her to the _Salita dè Crescenzi, _Less than a minute's walk away from the Pantheon and stopped. "You see, we are here already." Hermione gasped. He had stopped right in front of_ Armando al Pantheon_, a small but well-known _trattoria_ that was almost _always_ booked out. It was reputed to serve some of the best food in Rome, and famously had only twelve tables.

He escorted her inside, where the waiter greeted them both enthusiastically and led them to a small, intimate table in the back corner. Hermione looked around curiously. The walls were lined with beautiful oak paneling and pictures, in addition, of course, to the requisite shelves full of pickle jars and bottles of _vino_. It was a snug, comfortable little place, but with an element of class, seen in the pristine white linen table clothes and the fine porcelain plates. It was the ideal blend of cosiness and elegance.

Glancing at the menu in front of her, Hermione was torn- she knew she ought to order something small and low in calories for lunch, but the menu was far too tempting... _The pastas look simply wonderful….and the meats, oh….._ Snapping out of it, she took herself firmly in hand and settled on a salad. Her companion seemed to have chosen his meal also, and the waiter soon returned. Emilio ordered the _Spaghetti all'arrabiata_, and an _anti-pasto_ platter. Hermione chose a _Caprese_ salad, containing cheese and tomato.

Once the waiter had left, Emilio asked Hermione how she was finding life in Rome. This resulted in an exhaustive discussion on working and living in London and Rome.

"Don't misunderstand me- London has it charms. I do miss the small, out of the pubs one would invariably stumble across, the history, the familiar streets, my family…..she trailed off, clearing her throat. "But Rome possesses many enticements- the beauty, the history, the sheer vivacity and _spirit_ that is Rome itself. And of course, it is renowned for its cuisine, its fashion…it is a marvelous place."

"_Si_, this I know. I am Milanese, as you know, but even I see the life in _La Bella Roma_, it is truly a thing of beauty."

They continued in this vein for some time, until the waiter interrupted them and delivered their meals.

Strangely enough, Emilio did not eat, but merely looked at his plate, frowning, and obviously deep in thought.

"Emilio? Is anything the matter?"

He surprised her by sighing heavily. However, that was nothing compared to her surprise when he surreptitiously pulled a wand from his pocket and cast several silencing and privacy charms.

Hermione's jaw dropped. "You…you're a _wizard_?"

He nodded. "_Si_."

"B-but _why? _Why take the risk in showing me? You know nothing about me!"

A muscle flickered briefly in his jaw, but he said nothing.

Hermione felt a sense of dread in her stomach. "You…you know - you knew I was a witch. You knew who I was before we met, didn't you?"

He nodded again. "_Si_. I had been searching for you for several days. There were several places I was told you frequented. When I saw you in the ticket queue at the _Galleria_, I saw my chance and took it."

Staring at him in disbelief, she could manage only one word. "Why?"

He knew what she meant. "It is no secret that a Miss Hermione Granger fought in the British Blood Purity Wars and is a national hero. It is also no secret that she is the best of her class and the best witch of her generation. The _Ministero _and every private company in Italy have been trying to get Miss Granger to work for them for some time."

Hermione slowly shook her head in disbelief. "But what has that to do with you?"

He paused, evidently choosing his words carefully. "I am here on behalf of a client. My client, he knows that you have assembled a certain team. He has the greatest respect for your work, and asks only a small favour. He wishes me to present you with a token of his gratitude and humble respect should you choose to grant his request."

"Token?"

Emilio- assuming that was his real name- nodded. "The sum of 1,000,000 Euros, or 500,000 _Regine_, whichever you prefer."

"And the request?" She asked softly.

"A small thing- he wishes only the honour of working with you as a member of your team.

"I see." Her soft spoken words belied the fury, hurt and humiliation coursing through her.

Emilio did not appear to notice this, and pressed on. "I have here the contract ready for you to sign, in addition to a certified cheque from the bank. You are of course at liberty to cast any verification spells of your choosing on them."

"Of course," She stated quietly. "And I suppose your role in this matter is to make…. contact…and….convince...me by any means necessary. Am I correct?" She looked him directly in the eye.

Emilio nodded. "_Si_, it is my job to do whatever is necessary to develop a… suitable rapport. However, I saw that in this case, such an approach would be a mistake. You are not the type of woman this approach would be suited to."

It was perfectly clear what he meant.

Sickened by his admission, Hermione had heard enough. Once again, she had thought someone could possibly enjoy her company and once again it seemed she was sadly mistaken.

She stood up, and her words were cold and sharp. "Please convey to your …client_…_ that Hermione Granger is not for sale at ANY price. If you attempt to contact me again, or accost me in any manner, I will have no qualms in having you arrested for attempting to bribe a government official. Good day."

Throwing a few notes on the table, she nodded to the waiter and stalked rigidly out of the restaurant, her head held high. Once outside she found a small alleyway and apparated back to her office.

She threw herself into her work for the rest of the afternoon, refusing to allow herself to think on what had transpired in that restaurant. She read text after text and wrote countless summaries, waded through numerous reports and cleared all of her correspondence. Numbing herself to any emotion, she worked until her eyes hurt from the constant reading.  
Rubbing her eyes, she lay down her papers and stood, stretching, then checked her watch to find it was after six. She ought to go. _But perhaps I had better warn Enrico_, she thought emotionlessly. _He ought to know that someone is trying to infiltrate my project._

With that in mind, she gathered her papers into her satchel and, locking her office, walked down the corridor to Enrico's room. She knocked twice and waited.

"_Entra_!"

Pushing open the door, she walked into his office. The old man took one look at her face and immediately put down the parchment he was reading.

"Hermione_, _something is wrong?"

"There is a security threat that you ought to be aware of," she told him quietly.

Briefly, she described her encounters with Emilio and concluded with a brief description of his physical appearance.

Enrico was furious. "_Bastardo_! He dares to do this? I will alert the aurors to his description. This is intolerable! I am very sorry you were hurt, _piccola. _You do not deserve this."

Hermione shrugged. "It was bound to happen sooner or later. At least I learned his motives relatively quickly."

Enrico frowned. He knew the girl was upset but she was refusing to acknowledge it. She looked numb. "_Piccola, _forgive a nosy old man, but I worry about you. It is not good to bottle these feelings up_."_

She smiled mechanically. "I am perfectly well, Enrico, just a little tired. I think perhaps a nice bath and an early night would be just the thing. _Buona sera_, Enrico."

The old man sighed at the obvious dismissal. "_Buona Sera_, Hermione. Please, you will call me if you need anything?"

She nodded automicatally and apparated back to her apartment. Flicking her wand, she sent her briefcase into the study and then walked to her bedroom to change into something more comfortable.

Kicking off her shoes, she pulled off her jacket and trousers, followed by her blouse. Turning to pull a pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt from her wardrobe, she caught sight of her reflection.

And snapped.

All of the anguish she had felt at being abandoned by her best friends, all of the pain and self-loathing she felt, the misery and sadness, the _hunger, _the exhaustion, and the utter fury and humiliation she had faced today came pouring out.

She screamed. She screamed out all her pain and misery. She screamed out her hatred of herself. She screamed and sobbed as though her heart would break.

"WHYYYY? FAT! HIDEOUS! USELESS ! UGLY ! SCARRED! BARREN! UNWANTED ! ALOOONNNE ! PATHETIC!"

She wailed and screamed her heartbreak with every epithet until she thought her heart would explode in her chest. She hardly noticed when she fell to the floor, but continued to scream.

_Help! _She wept in her mind. _Oh please someone help me! _

* * *

_Sirius' Flat, London: 6:20pm local time_

Sirius clutched his old Italian textbook and checked his watch. It was six-twenty now, which meant it was seven-twenty in Rome. Feeling somewhat refreshed from his afternoon nap, Sirius was now wide awake and looking forward to seeing Hermione.

He knew that Hermione would not mind if he arrived slightly early and decided to portkey over immediately. Ensuring the security wards had been set, he took hold of the portkey and called "Roma, activate".

Opening his eyes not twenty seconds later, Sirius saw that he had arrived, but before he even had the chance to move, he heard someone screaming, and his blood ran cold. _Hermione_. Tossing aside the book and the portkey, he pulled out his wand and he ran towards the source of the sound. It led him straight to Hermione's bedroom. Terrified at the screaming coming from within, he charged straight in.

And saw Hermione curled in a ball on the floor, in her bra and panties, sobbing and screaming as though her heart would break.

Sirius froze; what had happened ?

When he heard _what_ Hermione was screaming, his heart bled.

"HIDEOUS! SCARRED! USELESS! UNLOVED!"

He felt as though each word was a physical blow, and he couldn't stand still any longer. Bending over, he scooped her into his arms and then sat on the edge of the bed, holding her to him.

"FAT! PATHETIC! ALONE! UNDESERVING! EMBARASSMENT!"

Sirius gasped. "No, Mione, no, love, no no, never! Don't say those things about yourself; never say those things about yourself! It's not true, none of it is true!"

She only wailed and screamed in response, clinging to him as though he were a raft in a storm; and perhaps he was. Each scream tore at his heart.

"Mione, love, talk to me, please, talk to me! Tell me what's wrong and I'll fix it, I promise, I'll fix it, I'll do anything! Please, just talk to me!" he begged, clutching her to him, rocking her back and forth.

She tried to speak, but only wailed all the more. Sirius begged and cajoled, comforted and soothed, but to no avail- she could not stop sobbing. Finally in his desperation, he made one final plea. "Please, Mione, let me _see_. I know you can't tell me, so let me see! I just want to help! Oh, Mione, please you've got to let me in, I can't bear to see you like this!"

He knew she might refuse. Legilimency was a dangerous and invasive art, but he could not think what else to do. However, to his immense shock and relief, she nodded, gasping and spluttering.

He stroked her hair and kissed her brow as she wept. "Are you sure, love?"

She did not speak but took his hand and placed it on her forehead, still sobbing loudly.

He kissed her brow again and leaned his forehead against hers. His eyes looking directly into her own, he raised his wand and whispered, "_Legilimens_".

Suddenly, he was in her mind, and memory after memory rushed out at him.

And he saw.

_A bushy haired little girl with large front teeth sat reading in a corner of what looked to be a school playground. He knew she loved her new book, a present from her grandmother. He could not have said how he knew, only that he did. Suddenly, several older girls and boys appeared on the edge of the playground. He could feel her dread as they approached her. One of the girls smirked. "Oh look, it's the Beaver the Brains! She has a new book! What's the matter, beaver? Your parents trying to make you feel better again coz you have no friends?"_

_The little girl shrank into herself, trying to hide behind her book, to no avail. One of the boys tore it from her hands, laughing. The little girl jumped up and tried to get it back, but they passed it from person to person over her head. They finally tired of the game and threw the book carelessly into the dirt. "Here, beaver, you can have your friend back. Get used to it coz it's the only one you'll ever have!" As the girl ran to pick up her book, one of the older girls stuck her foot out and deliberately tripped her. The girl fell flat on her face onto the pavement, and cried out in pain; Sirius could see she had split her lip and had several grazes on her cheek. The older children merely laughed. "Don't worry beaver, look on the bright side- not like you can get any uglier!" _

_Flash_

_A slightly older Hermione was in class and had received full marks on her homework when a note fell on her desk. Trembling, she opened it. It read simply 'Beaver the Brains, the animal wonder!' It also had a drawing of what looked like a stick figure with a rat's nest on its head. Sighing, she shoved the note into her bag and tried to blink away the tears that filled her eyes._

_Flash_

_Hermione was skipping down the hallway to the library: she had been invited to sit with the other girls in her year for the first time. She might even make a friend! Hermione had never had a friend before. Entering the library, she spied the other girls and walked to their table. They asked her to help with her homework. She ended up completing it for them before they left her alone in the library, the words 'Beaver the Brains' ringing in her ears._

_Flash_

_Sirius saw Hermione teaching Ron the Leviosa charm and Ron mocking her. Hermione ran to the bathroom in tears, before being attacked by a giant troll, followed by Harry and Ron barging in to save her. Hermione took the blame to save them. He felt her desperate longing for acceptance._

_Flash_

_He saw Malfoy calling Hermione a mudblood and telling her to go back to where she came from. Ron tried to curse him, whilst Harry looked confused. She was heartbroken when Hagrid told her what it meant, but took comfort from the fact that she had two friends to defend her._

_Flash_

_He spied her in the library, trying to discover what was petrifying the students so she could save Harry from the students' vicious gossip. Suddenly she saw two yellow eyes in her mirror and saw no more. Her last thought was that she had failed Harry._

_Flash_

_Sirius saw Hermione standing in the Great Hall, terrified about the mysterious Firebolt that Harry had been sent. He saw the boys screaming at her and then ignoring her for weeks, cutting her out brutally. He saw Hermione miserable and alone, and Malfoy trying to hex Hermione now that she was alone with no one to watch her back. _

_Flash_

_Hermione was crying in the library because her only friends had cut her out of their lives for a broom. He could feel her pain and confusion, her failure to understand why they would do this when all she had done was try to protect Harry._

_She had not been sleeping well, and had been skipping meals so as to avoid the Great Hall altogether. She had also been preoccupied with helping Hagrid with Buckbeak's hearing. She was becoming ill. She didn't care._

_Flash_

_She was shouting at Ron in the deserted Gryffindor Common Room, surrounded by privacy wards. "He's your best friend, Ronald, and someone is trying to kill him! They entered his name in a competition grown wizards have DIED in! He needs us now more than ever, and all you can do is feel jealous of the attention he is getting? Do you think Harry wants any more attention? He just wants to be normal; all he has ever wanted is to be normal!"_

_Ron was shouting back. "Bull, he's a selfish prat! Why didn't he share how to enter the competition with me then, eh? Because he doesn't want to share the glory with anyone else, that's why! Potter has everything- gold, fame and half the witches in this bloody school drooling over him! What the hell do I have? He has it all and he won't even share!"_

_SLAP! Hermione stood, chest heaving, as her hand dropped back to her side. A red mark was clearly evident on Ron's face._

_"EVERYTHING? Harry has NO PARENTS! His family is DEAD, Ronald, do you understand that? The reason he is famous is because a murderous psychopath killed his parents and then blew himself up trying to kill Harry! He remembers his MOTHER being KILLED, you insensitive IDIOT! Harry has been attacked and almost killed every year he has been at this school and is now being forced to compete in a ridiculous tournament that could easily kill him! The only family he has is his godfather, who was locked in Azkaban without so much as trial and can't take Harry in because he's on the run! Harry and I almost died to save him, and the Ministry is trying to sweep it all under the rug. Does that sound like someone who has everything? You have your whole family to love you, while he's forced to live with relatives who despise the very air he breathes! He didn't even know his own name until he went to school! He knew nothing about his parents, or the magical world. What part of that do you wish you had, Ronald?"_

_Sirius was shocked at the sheer rage in her voice. He had never seen her so angry and thought the Weasley idiot should have been cowering under the chair. However, it appeared the boy was too stupid to recognise danger when he saw it._

_"You're just taking his side- you always take his side!"_

_She fumed, "I'm not taking sides you idiot, I'm telling you the TRUTH!"_

_"You're such a bloody bossy know it all- think you know everything! You're just hoping that if you suck up to him, he'll fancy you back! Keep dreaming Hermione, now that he's a Champion, Harry bloody Potter will have every girl in the castle after him, and he can do much better than YOU!"_

_ Sirius could feel her shock, and heard her silent question. "How did Ron know that I like Harry?"_

_The blood drained from Hermione's face, and without a word, she turned and walked up the stairs to the girl's dormitory._

_Flash_

_Hermione sat in the stands, nails digging into her face as she watched Harry face the Horntail. He could feel her heart pounding in terror, but she held her wand at the ready. At the first sign of trouble, she was going in there and rules be damned! Harry would be hurt over her dead body!_

_Flash_

_Ron was apologising to Harry in the tent after the first task, while Hermione looked on, happy that Harry had his friend back, but still hurt at the horrible things Ron had said. They left the tent, and Sirius noticed that Ron had never apologised to her._

_Flash_

_Hermione was humiliated at what Skeeter had written about her, while Snape read the article in the classroom aloud. No one said anything._

_Flash_

_He saw Hermione screaming as her hands burned because of the pus someone had sent her. _

_Flash_

_Hermione sat in the infirmary, sobbing that no one had stood up to defend her, either teacher or student._

_Flash_

_Ginny stood in the girl's dormitory, chatting to Hermione whilst getting ready for class. Ginny was pushing her to use some makeup. "Just because you're plain doesn't mean you shouldn't make an effort! Although I'd probably lay off the sweets if you want to get asked to the Yule Ball- after all, even you have a chance, and you don't want to blow it! Besides, I'm sure one of the third years would go with you if you asked them, coz they can't go unless they're asked."_

_Hermione felt large and ungainly next to the slim redhead, and utterly humiliated at what her friend was saying. He could hear her silent wish to be someone else._

_Flash_

_Hermione stood in the Common Room, dressed in her periwinkle dress robes. She looked stunning. Her face however was red with anger, and there were tears coursing down her cheeks._

_Ron was once more standing in front of her, red faced and chest heaving. "For someone who's supposed to be so smart, I don't know how you can be so stupid! He's obviously using you to get information on Harry for the tournament!"_

_Hermione screamed right back. "Just because you don't see me as a girl doesn't mean everyone else suffers from the same problem! It's none of your business if Viktor finds me attractive!"_

_Ron practically turned purple. "It's my business because he's trying to sabotage Harry, and if you were actually using your bloody brains you'd see that too! He's not interested in you! He chose you because you're close to Harry! Look in the mirror Hermione- you think with girls like Fleur Delacour around he's going to look at a bushy-haired bookworm? Wake up!"_

_Hermione paled. "Well if it bothers you so much that he asked me, then ask me yourself next time, and NOT as a last resort!" With that, she turned and stormed up the stairs._

_Sirius growled as he heard Ron's shouted reply. "You ARE a bloody last resort, and if you had remembered that in the first place this never would have happened!"_

And so it went on.

Sirius was overwhelmed at the indifference and cruelty with which she had been treated by so many people. He shuddered when he reached the Battle of the Department of Mysteries in fifth year, and almost howled in despair when he saw her struck down by Dolohov. Her last thought was to wonder if Harry was alright.

He saw sixth year, and felt the terror that the unknown potions book inspired. Whilst her reaction might have seemed over the top to most, he could understand now just why she had reacted that way. Voldemort had openly returned and was murdering people left, right and centre. She feared that this book had been planted by someone with ill intent- she couldn't help but think back to the Chamber of Secrets and the Diary in second year. He felt her frustration and hurt at the petty accusations of jealousy, when all she was trying to do was look out for Harry.

He felt her pain and fury when Harry hit Draco with the _sectumsempra_ spell- he knew firsthand just how dangerous that spell was; after all he _had_ gone to school with Snape.

He felt her hurt as Ron flaunted his relationship with Lavender in her face. It was especially cruel because Ron knew of her fledgling feelings for him.

He felt her shame when she invited Cormac McLaggen to Slughorn's party, and the fury she felt when all he seemed to want to do was grope her. That was nothing, though, to the utter humiliation she felt when she overheard him complaining to another boy that all of his 'attentions' still hadn't gotten her to convince Harry Potter to make him the Gryffindor Keeper. He had been using her.

He felt her despair, and her hurt when Ginny turned on her. She began to criticise and mock Hermione publically, and more than once Hermione had caught her telling Lavender that she was ashamed to be seen with her. "But then, she is Harry's best friend, and I don't want to look like the bad guy, you know?"  
Hermione had bowed her head and left the room before they knew she was there. He saw her bravery and will to fight the night the school had been attacked; he also saw the determination with which she told Harry in no uncertain terms that she was coming with him on his hunt for the Horcruxes.

And then he saw seventh year. He was horrified at the danger with which they had been confronted from the outset- attacked by Death Eaters in a muggle café! _What the hell_? He thought.

He saw how hard she tried to control herself when dealing with Kreacher, refusing to treat him with anything other than respect and kindness, despite his prejudice and madness.

He saw the loyalty with which she stayed by Harry's side, and the sheer effort and skill she put into their plan to retrieve Slytherin's locket from the Ministry. He felt her fear when Ron was splinched as they tried to escape, and her guilt, thinking it was her fault. He saw the increasing tension between the three during their quest to destroy the locket.

He saw that last fight between Ron and the other two. Sirius was staggered to discover that Ron had abandoned them. How could he just leave his best friends in the middle of nowhere on a deadly hunt? He felt Hermione's hurt as she watched the man she cared for abandon her.

He was amazed at the sheer depth of her loyalty to Harry. He watched in terror as they went to Godric's Hollow and were attacked by Nagini, only escaping because of Hermione's skill and utter brilliance.

He felt the guilt she bore on discovering that Harry's wand was broken. He also felt the rage she harboured toward Ron when he finally returned, expecting that they would have just forgotten his betrayal and moved on.

He was enraged as he watched Xeno Lovegood betray them to try to get his daughter back, and watched, his heart pounding, as they escaped once again only due to Hermione's brilliance and quick-thinking.

However, nothing prepared him for the sight of what had happened in Malfoy Manor. He felt ill as he watched his deranged cousin torture Hermione with the _Cruciatus_, over and over and over again. _How could she stand it_? He cried silently. She should have been driven mad but somehow, she stayed strong. He was amazed that the only thought in her mind was Harry; she would not betray Harry. She would die to protect Harry. Her screams matched his own as Bellatrix carved that word into her arm- MUDBLOOD.

When she realised she could not hold on any longer, he felt a change. His heart broke as he felt her readying herself to die, and was gathering all her remaining strength and magic to attempt to blast both Bellatrix and herself into oblivion. He saw Dobby arrive and help them to escape. He felt her relief turn into horror at what that escape had cost them- Dobby.

He watched in horror and disbelief as she became Bellatrix and, with the boys, retrieved the cup from Gringotts, only to be betrayed by that bastard, Griphook, and escape on a bloody DRAGON.

He saw their return to Hogwarts. He saw the Final Battle and her bravery, fighting to the very end. He growled at the sigh of her fighting that bitch Bellatrix with Ginny and the Lovegood girl. He felt her terror when Hagrid carried Harry in, supposedly dead, and the vengeance that burned in her heart, only to be replaced by blazing joy to find he was alive.

He saw her humiliation and pain when, after the Battle, Ron had destroyed any hope of a relationship between them, announcing that he and Lavender Brown were 'giving it another go.' The bastard had also told her why.

_" Sorry, Mione but you know it would never have worked between us. You're too bloody bossy, and you don't pull your nose out of your books long enough to even take a look at yourself. Hell, I'll bet you don't even notice that thing on your arm! Lavender is pretty and fun and doesn't argue with me- she's everything I want. But don't worry Mione, I'm sure one day you'll find a guy who doesn't care what you look like. But hey, we can still be friends right_?"

He saw the following three years and how she was gradually eliminated from both the boy's lives. Ginny seemed to be partly responsible for that, but a large part of the blame lay on the boys themselves. Neither one had returned to Hogwarts and were preoccupied with their lives outside- they didn't bother to contact Hermione very often, although he noticed that the same didn't apply to Ginny. He saw Hermione's sad acceptance of the fact that Ginny was worth the effort to both boys, but that she, Hermione, was not.

He saw it go on and on, until he saw her encounter with that bastard Emilio today in the restaurant. _He's a dead man, _he growled to himself.

Exhausted, Sirius pulled himself out of Hermione's mind. She was still sobbing, but softly now, as if all the energy had gone out of her.

He tried to speak, but his throat felt as if it couldn't make a sound. He was awash with so many conflicting emotions he could hardly think. He finally managed to force out two words.

"Show me."

She flinched- she knew what he was referring to.

"Please?" He croaked.

Closing her eyes, she nodded once and turned her head away, unable to see his reaction.

Taking a deep breath, he pointed his wand at her left arm. "_Finite_," he uttered softly, closing his eyes.

Mustering all of his strength, he opened his eyes- and felt as though someone had punched him in the gut. The letters were red and angry, carved deep into her smooth flesh. They looked as they as though they had just been cut. Cursed scars, he knew, never healed.

It took him a few minutes to hear that Hermione was speaking again, softly this time. "Ugly….. So ugly. Now you've seen. Are you going to leave me too?

Sirius blanched, holding her close and spoke into her hair. "Never! Never say that! Mione how could you think I'd leave you? I could never leave you, love, never!"

She spoke so softly that he almost missed what she said next. "I'd leave me too if I could. Give anything to be anyone else. Scarred, hideous. Embarrassment to you all. Wouldn't blame you…."

She had stopped crying, finally, but he could see she was exhausted. Even her words were becoming slightly slurred.

He knew she would need to rest after such an exhausting ordeal, but he had to say something first. Taking her chin, he gently turned her head to face him. He looked in straight into her eyes as he spoke.

"Mione, you are NOT any of those things! You are beautiful!"

She shook her head, her gaze dropping to the angry markings carved into her skin.

He forced her chin up, uncaring that she could see the tears forming in his eyes, as he blinked to keep them at bay.

"Those do not make you ugly! They are BEAUTIFUL!" She stared at him flatly.

Taking her left arm, he bent his head and began to lightly brush his lips across each letter, blinking furiously as his tears fell onto her skin. He gently caressed her arm as he kissed it, whispering brokenly in between kisses. "Beautiful girl. Brave girl. So, so brave. So beautiful."

When he had finished, he looked up into her shocked face, gently letting go of her arm, and unashamedly wiped his eyes.

"They are beautiful, Mione, because they show your strength! They are a badge of honour! They show that despite everything that mad bitch did to you, you were stronger- YOUR will triumphed, not hers! Your strength is beautiful Mione, your bravery is beautiful. Your brilliant mind is beautiful. And you- YOU are beautiful. Don't shake your head at me- LISTEN to me! You have such a pretty face, and your body, God, Mione, your body is just perfect- all beautiful curves."

Hermione shook her head, and winced- he suspected she was developing one hell of a headache after all that crying.

"Don't argue Mione- remember, I have NEVER lied to you and I swear to you I am not lying now."

She just looked at him.

He sighed heavily. "Look, love, I know you're tired and probably have the mother of all headaches. Why don't you take a headache potion and rest for a couple of hours? I'll be right here, so don't think you're getting rid of me. We can talk after you've rested." He summoned a potion from the bathroom and gave it to her.

Too tired to argue, Hermione simply nodded, wincing, then swallowed the potion. Standing, he carefully pulled back the bedcovers, then laid her gently in the enormous bed and went to pull the covers over her scantily clad form. _Her deliciously soft and curvy form with that oh, so caressable smooth skin._ He froze momentarily in shock, then berated himself. _Bloody hell, she's a wreck- she needs a friend, not a dirty old man eyeing her up! Get a grip, man! _

Forcing himself to keep his eyes fixed on her face, he carefully covered her with a light blanket and kissed her forehead. She looked as though she had already fallen asleep.

Stroking her hair, he leaned in and lightly brushed his lips to her cheek.

_Sleep well, my Mione._

Moving quietly so as not to disturb her, he walked out of the room and into the living room, grabbing a handful of floo powder on the way to the fireplace. He silently cast _incendio_ and quietly called, "Lupin Home, London", then stuck his head into the fireplace. As soon as the world had finished its usual twisting and spinning, he found himself looking into Lupins' living room, where Remus sat in his favourite armchair, reading.

Not bothering to be subtle, he simply said, "Moony."

The werewolf jumped at the unexpected interruption, then saw Sirius' head in the fireplace.

Before Remus could say a word, Sirius spoke. "Come to Mione's flat. Now, if you can. Bring Tonks. And some calming potions if you have them."

With that, he pulled his head from the fireplace and walked to the Atrium, waiting.

Not three minutes later, Tonks and Remus appeared in the atrium, Tonks clutching a small bag he assumed contained the potions.

"What's happened, Padfoot?"

Sirius told them how he had found her when he arrived, and the state she had been in. He also told them about entering her mind, but revealed nothing of what he saw there.

"She's in bed. I gave her a mild headache potion, but I didn't want to leave her alone so I couldn't go back to my flat and fetch anything stronger."

Remus, seeing that Sirius was close to breaking point, asked Dora to go and sit with Hermione for a while. "Just in case she wakes up and she needs anything." He said.

Looking first at her husband, and then at her cousin, she nodded, and moved toward the master bedroom.

The two Marauders walked to the living room and sat on opposite ends of the couch, silent. Then Remus spoke.

"You saw it, didn't you?"

Sirius merely nodded, not trusting his voice.

Remus frowned. "I didn't want to keep it from you when you returned, but she swore me to secrecy."

Sirius choked a laugh. "It's not that Moony- I- she….there's so much hatred! She hates herself so very much. What she sees when she looks in the mirror, Moony- it's not real! It looks nothing like her!"

The two men were quiet for a moment.

"Sh-she thought I was going to leave her after I saw-it. How could she think I could ever- I can't leave her Moony, I could never leave her!"

With that, Sirius buried his head in his hands and silently wept.

Remus moved closer to his friend, and patted his shoulder, feeling utterly useless as he murmured, "I know, Padfoot, I know."

"I remember when I saw it- it was just after the war. I had seen her just after it happened and I-I smelled it. I confronted her later and she showed me." His voice dropped to a whisper. "I cried and screamed for hours. If that bitch had been alive, I would have killed her myself."

Sirius' shoulders shook as he sobbed, not a sound escaping the grieving man.

Finally, the tears seemed to have stopped. Wiping his eyes, he looked at his oldest friend, shaking.

"I'm staying here tonight, Moony. I'll take the room next to hers. I'll go and get some things from home if you and Tonks don't mind staying for a little while."

Remus smiled sadly. "Do you think we would leave her like this? We're staying too. I'll go and pack for us, Dora can sit with her in the meantime. I'll just let her know. You go ahead, though."

Sirius stood. "I'll see you in a little while." He activated his portkey and was gone.

Remus sighed heavily, thinking of the young woman resting in a room close by. _Hang in there Mione, _he thought. _We're all going in to bat for you- you're not alone anymore. Tomorrow, we fight for you._

* * *

_Hermione's Flat, Roma  
_

Two hours later, Sirius sat picking at the food on his plate. After he and Moony had retrieved some essentials for spending the night, Moony had prepared a light meal. None of the three was particularly hungry and had sat silently, barely managing to eat more than a few forkfuls.

Giving up, Sirius opened his mouth to excuse himself when a loud whimper cut through the silence. Knowing this to be the result of the _sonorous_ charm they had placed on Hermione's room, Sirius jumped to his feet and hurried down the corridor into Hermione's room. He approached the bed softly and peered into her pale face. She was still asleep and he could not see what had disturbed her. _Nightmares?_ He wondered. Merlin knew she had enough bad memories to fuel a thousand nightmares.

Just as he was about to back away, she whimpered. Sirius sat on the edge of her bed and reached out to smooth her hair from her brow, hoping the gesture would comfort her in whatever dream she was having. As his hand touched her skin, he frowned; she was unusually warm. Resting his hand fully on her forehead, he flinched. She was burning up. Carefully standing, he walked out into the hallway, where Remus and Tonks were hovering.

They frowned when they saw his expression. His words worried them even more.

"She has a fever."

Tonks pushed past him into the bedroom and walked quickly to the bed. Laying her hand gently on the sleeping girl's forehead, she frowned. The pink-haired woman took out her wand and cast several medical charms she had learned from her mother; the first measured body temperature, the second measured blood pressure and the third checked for infection. The results of the scans had her worried.

She carefully stood up and walked of the room, casting a one way silencing charm so their talking would not disturb the sleeping Hermione. However, they would still be able to hear Hermione should she call out.

Taking a deep breath, she told the Marauders. "She has a very high temperature, her blood pressure is extremely low, and I could find no trace of infection. I…I don't know what is causing the fever. I think we need a Healer. This could be dangerous; if she hasn't been eating she might not have enough strength to fight off whatever it is."

Remus grimaced worriedly. "But who can we ask? I don't know where the wizarding hospital is here and it could take hours to find out at this time of night. It's almost ten o'clock! And I somehow I don't think St Mungo's will let us abscond with a Healer to an undisclosed international location. I know she won't like this, but I think we might have to take her to St Mungo's. We can portkey her there."

Sirius's shoulders slumped. "What if it makes things worse? Just think what could happen if she wakes up and sees she's back in England, surrounded by people she doesn't to see and the stress makes her sicker? Look what stress has already done to her! Besides, it may not be safe for he at the moment..."

Tonks pursed her lips, and turned to Remus. "What about my mum?"

Remus blinked in surprise. "Andromeda? Well, I agree, it's better than taking Hermione to St Mungo's, and I'm certain she won't reveal Hermione's whereabouts. Yes, it may be best to bring Andromeda here."

At that moment, however, they heard a male voice calling from the living room.

"Hermione? Hermione, are you there, _piccola_?

Sirius growled. "Who the bloody hell is that?"

Remus turned to hide a small smile. Sirius' possessiveness amused him, despite the troubling circumstances.

Dora, also trying to hide a smile, answered him. "Well, why don't we go and find out?"

Sirius merely scowled at her and strode towards the living room, the smirking werewolf and the smiling metamorphous trailing behind.

They were surprised to find a grey-haired, rather handsome (or so Tonks privately thought) old man in the fireplace, looking anxiously around the room. More accurately, his _head_ was in the fireplace, looking anxiously around the room.

He looked up when they entered, surprised to see these people instead of Hermione.

Sirius spoke first. "Who are you?"

The old man eyed him curiously. "I am Enrico Martinelli, Hermione's work colleague. I think I can guess who you are, _Signore_ Black. And these charming people must be and _Signore_ and _Signora_ Lupin ?

Tonks nodded, puzzled. "Yes, how did you-?"

Sirius nudged her with his elbow. "This is Mione's Head of Department. He's the man who authorised our travel papers."

Turning to Enrico, he asked, "Why are you trying to reach Mione? Is there a problem at the _Ministero_? She's resting at the moment."

The old man's gaze sharpened. "She is not well? _Scusa_, but will you permit me to come through? This will not be a short conversation, I think, and my old knees, they begin to protest."

Sirius nodded. There was a _whoosh_, and Enrico stood before then, dusting off his robes. He shook Sirius' hand, repeated the gesture with Remus and then turned to Tonks, brushing his lips over knuckles. Tonks' blush turned her cheeks almost as pink as her hair.

Turning to Sirius, he explained the reason for trying to contact Hermione so late in the evening.

"Earlier today, an incident occurred, and Hermione, she was hurt. She told me she was well, and would not talk to me about it. But me, I am a nosy old man and I am…how you say? Fond?...yes, fond of Hermione, so I worry about her. So I call her to check on her. You say she is ill?"

Sirius replied "Yes, she is." Just as Remus blurted, "Incident? What incident?"

Sirius shot him an uncharacteristically sharp look and said, "Later, Moony."

Turning back to Enrico, he explained the situation they found themselves in.

"Hermione is ill, she has a high fever and low blood pressure, yet we can't find any sign of infection. She needs to be examined by a Healer, and Tonks- _Signora_ Lupin- suggested her mother. I think this is the best option, because Mione won't thank us if we draw unnecessary attention to her, especially after today's incident. Andromeda is discrete and she won't object to swearing a secrecy oath. However, she does not possess any Italian travel papers."

The old man stood up immediately. "If you will give me her full name, it shall be done immediately."

Sighing in relief, Sirius summoned a quill and parchment and wrote Andromeda's name down, then gave the slip to Enrico.

"_Mille_ _grazie_, _Signore_ _Martinelli_. I don't know how to thank you."

Enrico smiled. "Call me Enrico. And there is no need to thank me- Hermione is very special, no?" Slipping the parchment into his pocket, he told them, "The papers will be completed and filed in ten minutes. Your mother, she will be free to enter _Italia_ after this time. I return with her papers."

Turning on the spot, he apparated.

Tonks turned to Sirius. "I'll go and get mum as soon as he gets back with the papers. Do you really think a secrecy oath is necessary?"

Sirius nodded sharply. "Yes, I do. People seem to be trying to get their hands on Hermione, both here and back home. I won't leave any loopholes for them to get to her, and if that means being as paranoid as my own bloody father, then so be it."

Tonks narrowed her eyes. "Exactly what happened today, Sirius?"

He sighed, and told them about Emilio.

Tonks swore violently, her hair turning a deep red and her face contorted with rage. "That bastard! He made her like him! She thought he wanted to be her friend and he was just trying to get her to sign a bloody _contract_?" Suddenly she gasped. "Oh, God. He didn't try and…_seduce_ her, did he?"

Sirius shuddered violently. "No, thank God, he didn't. He saw it wouldn't work with her, told her she wasn't the seduction routine type. She didn't..._care_ for him that way." His voice began to break. "She was just happy to have a handsome man voluntarily seek her out- she never thought it would turn into anything else. Sh-she thought it was the closest she would ever get to a date, and she _accepted_ that." He finished brokenly.

Tonks shook her head, muttering and swearing under her breath. Sirius, however, was watching Remus. The werewolf was sitting very still, and had not uttered a word.

Before Sirius could say a word, however, they heard a 'pop' in the Atrium, and a voice calling out, "_Signore_ Black?"

Sirius ran out of the room and found the old man waiting in the Atrium, clutching a sheaf of papers.

"I have her travel papers and also a permission from the Chief Healer for her to practice her profession in Italy."

Sirius almost snatched the papers from his hand, perusing them eagerly. The old man eyed him, the glimmer of a twinkle in his eyes. He suspected that this young man's feelings for Hermione went far deeper than friendship.

"If you wish to fetch _Signora_ Tonks now, you are free to do so. I leave you now, but if you permit, I contact you on the Floo in the morning. Any time that Hermione needs to recover, she has it." He turned to go, then stopped to look at Sirius. "And _Signore_, take care of her." With that, he popped out of the room.

Sirius walked quickly back to the living room and handed the papers to Tonks. Retrieving the Lupins' portkey, she turned to Sirius. "I'll make sure mum takes the oath before I bring her." Kissing her husband briefly, she activated the portkey and vanished. Remus did not move.

Sirius walked carefully over to Remus, and sat next to him. "Moony?"

There was no reply.

"Moony?" He tried again.

The lycanthrope turned to look at Sirius. The flickering amber and blue eyes told Sirius that the wolf was trying to take over, and that Remus was struggling to keep control.

"We must find him." The harsh, raspy voice told Sirius just how close the wolf was to taking over.

Sirius knew he had to tread carefully here, not to mention control his own fury towards that unprincipled bastard.

"We can't kill him. We need him." He told Remus warily, gauging his reaction.

"He hurt her. He hurt our packmate. He will die."

Sirius sighed. "Someone is trying to get to Hermione and went to the trouble of hiring that bastard to get close to her. If we kill him, he will send another. We have to find out who the person is behind it all and stop him. Otherwise he will hurt her, especially now that she has refused his first offer. We need this Emilio to set a trap."

That seemed to placate the wolf slightly, allowing Remus to wrest control from the wolf. Remus shuddered, and his eyes returned to their usual blue.

"I'm sorry, Padfoot, I couldn't-"

Sirius cut him off." Moony, I've told you time and time again. You are my best friend, and I accept you, all of you, the way you are. That includes the wolf."

He grinned mirthlessly. "Besides, I've been fighting my own baser urges since I saw what he did. I have to admit, pounding the bastard into a pulp still appeals to me, but Mione's safety means more to me than venting my anger. She comes first. Always."

Remus smiled tiredly. "You're right- we have to try and catch whoever is doing this." He frowned slightly. "To be honest, I don't like the idea of her living alone at the moment. I know she's more than capable of taking care of herself, but…."

Sirius nodded. "I feel the same way. When she wakes up, I think I'll ask her how she feels about adopting a dog." He smirked. "I am housetrained, after all."

The sandy-haired man smiled. "I think that's a wonderful idea; with the portkeys, it's easy enough to commute back and forth every day to the Ministry. I think Tonks, Teddy and I will be frequent houseguests as well."

The two men sat in silence, each deep in thought. The silence was suddenly interrupted by the arrival of two women in the Atrium.

Tonks quickly escorted her mother to Hermione's bedroom and led her in, carrying a small black bag.

Andromeda, a beautiful middle-aged woman who greatly resembled her sister Bellatrix before her imprisonment, walked to the bed and began to cast a number of diagnostic spells. After a casting another few spells, she turned to her daughter, and gestured for her to follow her out of the room and into the hallway, where Sirius and Remus were waiting.

"You didn't tell me I would be examining Hermione Granger."

Tonks winced at her mother's tone. However, Sirius saved her from answering.

"Dromeda, there's a reason we made you take that oath and why Tonks rushed you over here so quickly. Hermione seems to have attracted the attention of some shady characters and we are taking no risks whatsoever with her safety. To save time, yes, that was Hermione Granger and yes, we are in Rome. Hermione moved here recently and has not told ANYONE apart from the three of us- and Teddy, of course. Speaking of which, if you're here, who's watching Teddy?"

Andromeda scowled. "Augusta Longbottom came over for tea. She'll watch him until I get back. I think I can manage my grandson without your expert assistance, Sirius Black!"

Sirius looked sheepishly at the floor. "Er, right.…"

Remus interrupted. "What is wrong with Hermione?"

Andromeda sighed. "She has severely strained her magical core, and exhausted her body. I detected mild malnutrition due to a significant period of near starvation, exhaustion and severe stress. As a result, her body has been drawing on her magic in order to continue to function, and has therefore exhausted itself."

Sirius blanched. "Will this have any permanent effect?"

"At this point, I think she ought to come through quite well with no permanent damage. Another week or two, however, and the result could have been quite different. As it is, she requires nutrient and dreamless sleep potions. If one of you will administer a nutrient potion now, she is to take another in the morning. I suggest giving her the dreamless sleep potion and sleeping draught immediately after you administer the nutrient- she will need all of the rest she can get. Give her dreamless sleep and a sleeping draft each night for the next week. She will also require an improved diet; I don't know what she has been doing, but it needs to stop now. I will give Dora a list of suggested meals to ease her back into eating. If one of you would be so good as to collect me in the morning, I will examine her again. And now, if you will excuse me, I must return to Teddy."

Bidding Sirius and Remus goodnight, she and Tonks clutched the portkey and disappeared.

Five minutes later, Tonks reappeared clutching a small bag. "Mum gave me the diet list and the potions. I'll go and give her the first few. Just hope I can keep her awake long enough to do it."

With that, she turned and marched into Hermione's room.

Sirius turned to Remus. "I've taken the room next to Mione's, incase anything happens…."

Remus tried to soothe his worried friend. "You heard Andromeda- as long as she rests and begins to eat normally again, then she'll be fine! Look, it's 11'o'clock and we had a hell of a night last night, and we are sure to have one hell of a morning tomorrow. Get some sleep, Sirius, you need the rest."

Sirius nodded, then turned and padded down the Hallway and into his room, closing the door. Remus followed suit. He hoped he sleep would not prove too elusive, but somehow, he doubted he would rest easily tonight. He had far too much on his mind.

* * *

_Hermione's flat, Roma: 2:00am local time_

Sirius lay on his back staring at the ceiling, unblinking. He , like Remus, doubted he would sleep tonight; his mind could not stop churning through everything that had happened in the past twenty-four hours.

However, if were to be completely honest with himself, he would admit that Lira and her betrayal, the plan to expose her, and his loss over the chance at a family and happiness came a very poor second to what had happened here today. His heart ached when he thought of what he had seen in Hermione's mind. She had been carrying those thoughts, those memories alone all of this time. She had been ignored and put down again and again, to the point where she no longer saw herself as she truly was.

He turned over restlessly, dislodging his blanket. How could she hate herself so? He had almost screamed at the waves of revulsion he felt in her mind. How could Mione, so brave, so brilliant, so beautiful, so kind, so _perfect_, see herself as nothing more a hideous embarrassment, devoid of any worth? He still could not believe the reflection she saw whenever she looked in the mirror; a distorted, repulsive woman awash with flaws. _That _was what she saw? _That_ was how she saw herself? He had wanted to weep.

Groaning with frustration, he pushed back the covers and sat up on the edge of his bed. Glancing at the small clock on the nightstand, he groaned again. _It's two o'clock in the bloody morning! _He groused. _I need to get some bloody SLEEP!_

Sighing, he decided to read for a while. Perhaps that would help him relax sufficiently to enable him to sleep. With that in mind, he stood and walked over to his overnight bag and rummaged through its contents until he found his pyjama bottoms. Slipping on the navy cotton sleep trousers, he padded barefoot into the hallway and turned toward Mione's study.

Halfway there, however, he heard a soft whimper from Mione's room. Turning quickly he headed straight to her room, and saw her mumbling and shifting restlessly. Creeping softly to the bed, he sat carefully on the edge of the mattress and smoothed the hair from her brow. Seeing that it seemed to sooth her, he repeated the action, then, unable to help himself, he kissed her brow. The sleeping girl emitted a soft sigh. In spite of himself, he smiled. She looked more relaxed now. _My beautiful sleeping angel_, he thought.

Seeing that his presence soothed her, he decided to stay. After all, she had done the same for him, sleeping in a stiff armchair by his bed for months to soothe his nightmares. Caressing her cheek, he stood up and transformed into Padfoot. Padding around to the other side of the bed, he jumped on and turned on the spot several times, and settled at the foot of the bed. Laying his head on his paws, Padfoot closed his eyes. And slept.

Meanwhile, Remus stood watching in the doorway, having been startled out of bed by Hermione's magically amplified whimper. Smiling, he turned and walked back into the room he shared with Dora. Slipping into bed, he wrapped his arms about his fitfully sleeping wife and pulled her close. "Love you", he whispered into her hair, and closed his eyes.

* * *

_Hermione's Flat, Roma: 9:00am local time_

Padfoot's ears twitched, hearing the low murmur of voices approaching. The large, black dog opened his eyes and yawned widely. He stood and stretched, first his hind legs, followed by his front legs, and carefully hopped off the bed. Padding around to the other side of the bed, he looked at the sleeping girl. Satisfied that she was sleeping peacefully, he whined softly and gently licked the soft hand resting on the covers. He then turned and padded quietly out of the room and into his own, shifting back into a black haired, well-muscled wizard in navy cotton pyjama pants. Rifling through his bag, he gathered the necessary items and walked into the ensuite to shower and prepare for the day ahead.

Fifteen minutes later, he strolled into the kitchen dressed in blue jeans and a white fitted t-shirt, his silky black locks loose around his shoulders, and saw Andromeda and her daughter sitting at the kitchen table, sharing a cup of tea. Both women looked up as he entered the room and strolled to the refrigerator. "Good morning Tonks, Dromeda. Sleep well?" He asked absently as he rifled through the fridge, looking for the bacon. He knew Mione liked to keep her meats in the muggle device rather than in a charmed cupboard.

"Good morning Sirius, Dora tells me that Hermione had a somewhat restless night, despite the dreamless sleep potion." She frowned. "That is highly unusual. It only occurs when the patient suffers from extreme mental turmoil and stress."

Having located the bacon and the eggs, Sirius was in the process of heating a pan. At Andromeda's words, however, he turned towards her and gave her a hard look.

"Mione is NOT mad."

Andromeda sighed. "I _mean,_ Sirius that she is suffering from extreme stress and her mind is unable to 'switch off' enough to let her rest fully. I am quite sure that she is saner by far than the current Lord Black!"

Sirius blushed. "Sorry, Dromeda. I just…she's been hurt so much, I…"

The black haired woman softened her tone. "I understand, Sirius, and am very glad that she has all of you to take such good care of her. Now, as she has not had as much rest as I would like-" She suddenly paused as she heard a voice calling softly from the living room..

Sirius dropped the bacon. "That must be Enrico- Hermione's boss," he added for Andromeda's benefit. "He's the one who organized your papers. He was very worried about Mione last night."

He hurried quickly out of the kitchen and into the living room.

"Good morning, Enrico. We are just having breakfast. Would you care to join us?"

They owed the man a large debt- his quick intervention had enabled Hermione to be examined and treated immediately. He shuddered to think what would have happened had they waited.

The old man nodded. "_Si_, if it would not be too much trouble, I would be pleased to. _Grazie_."

A few moments later both men were strolling into the kitchen, where Sirius introduced the older man to Andromeda.

"_Signora_ _la_ _dottoressa_," Enrico intoned, bowing and kissing her hand.

She bowed her head graciously. "_Signore il direttore_."

Tonks was fascinated; she rarely saw her mother play the part of a 'noble lady of the house of Black.' She was surprised how comfortable she looked in the role. Tonks herself still blushed madly every time someone kissed her hand.

Remus had emerged from his shower by this point, dressed in light blue jeans and a dark grey polo shirt, and was cooking the bacon and eggs Sirius had begun to prepare. A quick wave of his wand send plates of food to the table as the others sat down.

Glancing at Sirius, who nodded, Andromeda continued what she had been saying prior to Enrico's arrival as they all began to eat.

"As I said, Hermione did not sleep as well or as deeply as I would have liked, and so I would suggest administering another sleeping draught, along with the other potions I prescribed. A half-dose of the draught will do, and will keep her asleep until four o'clock or so. Now, I am aware that Remus, Nymphadora" here Tonks winced- "and Sirius have a pressing previous engagement which will occupy them until at least two or three in the afternoon. Someone must stay here with Hermione and ensure that her condition does not suddenly worsen. It is not likely to do so, mark you, but someone should stay nonetheless. Teddy is currently being watched by Augusta Longbottom, but I will need to return home soon. She has pressing business of her own to attend to, and I do not think it will be a good idea to bring Teddy here whilst Hermione is ill. Who will stay with her?"

After a moment, Sirius spoke, laying down his cutlery. "I will stay with her."

Remus shook his head, helping himself to another rasher of bacon. "No, Padfoot, you are needed elsewhere this morning. This is something we _must_ do, you know that."

Enrico, who had been watching the proceedings in puzzlement, ventured to ask a question. "_Scusa,_ but cannot Hermione's parents visit? I am aware they are non-magical but I can arrange a portkey for them."

The others were silent, their eyes downcast, with the exception of Andromeda, who looked questioningly at her daughter.

It was Tonks who answered him, pushing her eggs around her plate. "Her parents died during the war."

Enrico's eyes normally cheeky black eyes were filled with a sorrowful understanding as he wiped his mouth and lay down his cutlery.

"Ah, I see now why she does not speak of them. I offer to stay myself, but I think Hermione, she might not feel at ease to find me here whilst she is ill."

Remus nodded. "I think you are right. Either Dora or myself will have to stay with her."

Standing, the old man nodded to the assembled group. "Very well, I return to the _Ministero_. If I can be of service, please, you Floo call me and I come immediately. Oh, and please tell Hermione that I…how you say…cover her workload and meetings, and she must not worry. Today, she must rest. _Arrividercci_, _signore e signori_." With that, Enrico was gone.

Sirius let out a breath he had been holding and turned to Remus. "I know that we wanted all of us to be there this morning, but it isn't going to happen. If you aren't willing for me to stay with Hermione, then either you or Tonks will need to stay. There is no one else."

Tonks sighed, running her hands through her short pink hair. "I think it best that I stay- probably better to have a woman here, just in case she needs help bathing or something later."

Andromeda, however, had another solution to offer, as she waved her wand to clean her plate and send it back to its cupboard. "What time is your appointment?"

"Eleven o'clock, in London, mum."

Andromeda nodded. "Very well, then I suggest this. Eleven o'clock British time is midday Italian time, correct?" At their nods, she continued. "If you are able to stay here until 12.30 Italian time, that is 11.30 English time, I believe I will be able to leave Teddy with Augusta, as she will have concluded her business at Gringotts. If someone could then come and collect me, I can easily stay here until you all return."

Tonks smiled in relief. "Thanks mum. You have no idea what this means to us. I'm sorry we can't tell you more, but…."

Her mother smiled back. "It's alright, I understand. I would never expect you to break a confidence."

Hugging her mother gratefully, Tonks summoned the portkey from the living room. With a nod from Andromeda, they activated the portkey and disappeared.

Remus stood and cast several cleaning charms, sending all of the now spotless dishes spinning into their cupboard, whilst the remaining food wrapped itself in foil, which he then placed in the refrigerator.

A few moments later, Tonks reappeared and sat down at the table, followed by the two others.

"I'll never get used to how easy it is to travel by portkey now. I think I'm too used to leaving my insides somewhere over the British Channel."

Remus shook his head ruefully. "Likewise. Typical Ministry procedure- ignore all developments at any cost, simply because they were created by 'foreigners.'"

Sirius, however, brought them all back to the matter at hand.

" We have about two hours before we meet with Harry and the others. How are we going to do this?"

Remus frowned. "I think there's only one thing we can do- tell them the truth."

Tonks nodded vehemently. "After seeing what's happened to Mione today, I'm in no mood to spare their feelings. This time, they are going to see exactly what it is they've done."

Sirius nodded slowly. "Before we see them, however, I think there are a few things you ought to know."

* * *

_Sirius Black's Flat, London: 11:00am local time_

Harry and the others were due to arrive at any minute, and Sirius was far too full of restless energy to sit down for more than about sixty seconds. He had taken to pacing the living room floor.

In direct contrast, Remus sat quite still in his armchair, seemingly calm and collected. Only his hands, gripping his knees until his knuckles had tuned white, gave any indication of the roiling emotions within. Neither had spoken since their arrival. In fact, Remus had not spoken a word since Sirius had given the Lupins a heavily edited and abridged version of what he had seen in Hermione's mind. Some things, he did not reveal; he did not think it was his place to reveal Hermione's secrets. However, he told them in general terms of the boys' hurtful behaviour, of Ron's cruelty and Ginny's hurtful putdowns, in addition to their neglect of her in their final year. Their reactions had been very similar to his own, and now, they waited; they waited to confront those responsible for this behaviour.

Despite the fact that they were waiting for it, the sudden peal of the doorbell startled them both. Sirius glanced at the white-faced Remus, who sat fighting to control his emotions, and, taking a deep breath, went to open the door. He tried to smile at the black-haired, green eyed young man who stood in front of him.

"Sirius! How are you?"

Harry's cheerful voice fueled Sirius' already conflicted emotions, and he smiled feebly at the young man, who pulled him into an embrace.

"Pup, I'm glad you stopped by. Hello Ron, Ginny," he said, nodding to them as ushered them in.

"Come through to the living room. Moony is here as well, and Tonks will be joining us a little later."

Harry positively beamed. "Brilliant! We can tell you the news together then."

Sirius attempted another smile and followed them into the living room. Remus rose, his face outwardly calm, as he smiled politely at the three. "Hello, you three."

Sirius sat down, and motioned for them to do the same. The three sat on the leather couch, which faced the two chairs that he and Moony sat on. He noticed that Harry and Ginny clasped hands immediately, whilst Ron smiled indulgently at them. Sirius began to form an idea of what their news might be, and inwardly he cringed. After all he had seen in Hermione's memories, he hated to think of his godson engaged to this woman. From what he had seen, he thought her to be a somewhat materialistic, jealous girl with a mean streak a mile wide. He noted that whilst Harry and Ron were dressed in jeans and collared shirts, albeit top of the range designer jeans and shirts, Ginny was wearing a tailored green silk dress with a matching jacket and heels, and a string of black pearls. _Surely that's a bit overdressed for an informal visit to your boyfriend's godfather, isn't it? _ He wondered.

He cleared his throat. "Would any of you care for a drink?"

Harry shook his head, followed by refusals from the other two.

Sitting back in his chair, Sirius looked questioningly at Harry. "So, what is this news?"

His godson smiled, and caressing Ginny's hand, which, Sirius now noticed, bore a ring with a diamond the size of a golf ball, announced, "You are now looking at the soon to be Lady Potter!"

Sirius flinched internally. He remembered a similar occasion twenty-two years ago, when James and Lily had announced their engagement to their friends. He would never forget the goofy smile on Prongs' face as he grabbed Lily's hand and shouted, "She said yes! She's mine!"

On the one hand, he was happy for his godson; it warmed his heart to see him so happy and content. On the other hand, he was worried about the kind of woman his godson had chosen to marry. Add to the mix his worry about Hermione, lying in a potion induced sleep in Rome, and his fury at the three people sitting in front of him for helping to put her in that state, and the result was that Sirius simply froze. His throat seemed to have temporarily lost its ability to produce any sort of sound, and so he sat, staring at the beaming Harry and the artfully demure Ginny.

Remus, thankfully, managed to pull himself together enough to offer polite congratulations to the couple. However Sirius noticed, despite his near catatonic state, that Moony's smile did not reach his eyes.

Forcing himself to react, Sirius tried to smile and offered his congratulations to the happy couple. Fortunately, they were so caught up in one another that they failed to notice that the felicitations from the two older men were somewhat stilted.

Sirius and Remus glanced at each other, however, before either one could utter a word, Ginny had launched into a detailed description of how Harry had proposed.

"It was _so_ romantic," she gushed, batting her eyelashes at Harry. "He proposed over dinner in our penthouse suite in the Hotel Martinnez."

Sirius blinked. "You stayed the most expensive suite in Cannes for _two weeks_?"

Even for families such as the Potters and the Blacks, who could easily afford it, almost seven and half thousand galleons_ (_just over twenty two thousand pounds sterling) _per night_ was a rather excessive extravagance for an ordinary holiday. He shuddered to think of how much they would spend on their honeymoon.

Ginny sighed blissfully. "Harry's so good to me. This outfit is just one of the many he bought me- Cannes has such lovely boutiques. He also got me some matching robes."

Sirius ignored her blather and instead chose to focus on an earlier comment that provided an adequate starting point for the conversation _he_ had in mind.

"Lady Potter, you say? So you've decided to take up the Potter title after all, then, Harry? I thought you wanted nothing to do with it. James would be pleased, I must say."

Harry shrugged, still gazing adoringly at Ginny. "I wasn't intending to, but my Ginny wanted to be Lady Potter, so I decided to take it up. I'm hoping that you'll come with me to Gringotts for the rite?"

Sirius frowned. "Harry, of course I will accompany if you decide to undergo the Rite of Inheritance, but the title of Lord or Lady Potter is no mere social accessory. It is a grave responsibility. You will be required to vote or appoint a proxy for each sitting of the Wizenagamot. You are also required to manage the Potter finances and investments. You will be required to make various charitable contributions per the terms of the Family Charter. Furthermore, once you have assumed the title, the other Heads of House will expect you to behave and respond in accordance with the customs of the wizarding nobility. Any failure in this regard could bring the Potter Family into disrepute, thus lessening your influence. Influence is essential when attempting to pass new laws through the Wizenagamot and trying to make changes. Let me put it this way- would you like to see all power rest solely in the hands of families like the Malfoys?"

Harry stared at his godfather, and shook his head. "No, but I didn't know all this…"

Sirius sat up straight. Remus watched interestedly; there was no doubt that they were now addressing Lord Black, Head of the most Noble and Ancient House of Black. Sirius Black, charmer and prankster extraordinaire was currently no where to be seen.

"Harry, before you move to either accept or decline your title, you must learn of the responsibilities and duties which accompany it. I have been trying to tell you of this since my return from the veil. If you so desire, I shall organise the proper instruction for you. I suggest you do nothing until then."

Harry nodded dumbly. Remus almost sniggered- the three appeared completely dumbstruck to hear Sirius speaking of responsibilities. They all knew, of course, that he worked as a Senior Auror, but evidently they had no idea of the responsibilities he bore as Lord Black.

Dropping his formal demeanor, Sirius relaxed slightly. "Harry, I know you are surprised, but you must understand- your father was Moony's and my brother, and you are my godson. I will always to do my best for you and try guide you, but that also means that when you have done something wrong, I will not hide the fact. I will be honest and expect you to take it like a man."

This time Harry managed to speak. "Er...thanks Sirius. Yeah, I think it'd be good to get that instruction so at least I have some idea. I…I honestly had no idea it was so involved. I thought it was just…."

Sirius smiled genuinely for the first time that day. "You thought it was just a stupid old title that carried a lot of cash? I did too, once. But I learned otherwise. And now, so have you. There's no shame in taking correction, pup. The shame is to ignore your errors and try to sweep them under the rug, or worse, try to blame them on someone else."

Harry nodded thoughtfully. "Yeah, kind of like Fudge used to do. No matter how he screwed up, he would never admit it and things just got worse."

"Exactly."

Remus sat quietly, having nothing to add to the discussion. Inwardly, however, he was beaming with pride in his friend. So many people saw Sirius as a charming, affable man, a handsome man, one of fortune's darlings as it were, and most ignored the other, more serious side to Sirius Black. He had the courage of a lion, a loyal and loving heart and an inner strength that would shame the strongest steel. Most people also forgot that he was an extremely intelligent man and was as cunning as any Slytherin.

His pleasant reverie was, however, sadly disrupted, (rather predictably) by the renowned eloquence of Ronald Billius Weasley.

"Bloody hell, Sirius, never thought you'd be the lecturing type! Cor, you sounded just like Hermione then. 'You need to take your responsibilities more seriously, Ronald.' He whined in a high, nasal voice, before laughing heartily at his own cleverness.

Remus opened his mouth angrily, but Sirius held up a hand to stop him, his steely-eyed gaze boring into the red-haired boy in front of him.

And he _was_ a boy, Remus thought scathingly. His mind had not yet caught up with his body, it seemed.

"And, what, pray-tell, Ron, is so amusing about that?" He asked quietly.

His tone caused Ginny to stop mid-giggle, whilst the grin on Harry's face vanished.

However Ron, observant as ever, ploughed on ahead. "Oh, you remember what she was like when she stayed at yours in fifth year. It was one lecture after another. Drove me mental, she did. Remember she pissed you right off, too, with her bloody lectures and elf-rights. Always was a bookish swot."

Sirius' gaze was like molten steel. "I remember that she saved your lives more times than I care to count. I remember that she was nothing but kind to me despite my being a miserable, self-centered arse for most of her fifth year. And I remember that her being 'a bookish swot' saved your lazy arse from failing Hogwarts. Which part of that amuses you Ronald?"

The redhead finally appeared to notice that "something is rotten in the State of Sirius' living room", and tried to backpedal.

"Sirius mate, no need to get riled up, it was just a joke, yeah?"

Remus could not remain silent any longer. "Oh, of course, it was a joke, that's all right then! By all means, let's all make fun of the woman who stood by each of us without fail! Oh yes, most amusing," he snarled.

Sirius cast him a calming glance, then returned his gaze to its squirming redheaded target.

Harry looked at Remus questioningly. "Remus, he didn't mean any harm, it was a silly joke, what…?"

Remus turned to face the black haired young man, who so resembled his dead brother in all but blood.

"And what," he growled, "is so amusing about making fun of a woman who suffered beyond telling for the both of you, who carried you through your troubles and never asked for a thing in return?"

Harry looked at him, puzzled. "We've always all been there for each other, no one more than the others."

Sirius merely looked at them, his blood beginning to boil. "Oh you think so, do you?" he asked in a deadly quiet tone. "You think you've repaid her friendship equally?"

Harry's green eyes grew heated. "Of course we have! She's our best friend! What kind of a question is that, Padfoot?"

Seeing that Sirius was struggling to maintain his control, Remus stepped in.

"A perfectly fair question Harry. But here's your chance to prove me wrong. Since you're her best friend, you will no doubt know about the significant event you missed two weeks ago. Would you care to tell me what it was?"

Harry was taken aback by this question. "What significant event? It was just a dinner, she organises them every now and then."

"Is that so? Perhaps you'd care to tell me the date of this casual dinner?"

Frowning, Harry thought for a moment. "I think it was the eighteenth or the nineteenth of September, at the Leaky Cauldron."

"Actually, it was the nineteenth of September at the Three Broomsticks, for your information."

Ginny interrupted at this point. "I don't see what difference it makes when it was! It was a social non-event at a completely _gauche_ location- what does it matter?"

Sirius turned his steely gaze on her. "I would be silent for now, if I were you, Ginevra. Your turn to answer will come soon enough." Ignoring the sputtering girl, he turned his gaze to Harry.

"Well, Harry? Notice anything significant about the date?"

"No…..I don't think so…."

Sirius growled, unable to stop the noise leaving his chest. "I don't suppose you happen to remember on what day of the year Hermione was born?"

Harry started to shake his head, then stopped, his eyes widening in comprehension. "The nineteenth….She was born on September the nineteenth."

Remus interrupted. "Oh and it gets better. I don't suppose you happen to know if there was anything significant about this particular birthday?"

Once again, Ginny interrupted. "Of course not! It's just another birthday! Alright, so we missed her bloody birthday! We'll send her a card and be done with it!" She immediately fell silent when Sirius turned his gaze to her once more. Ron sat with a look of confusion on his face. It seemed he hadn't caught on to what was happening yet.

Remus, however, was watching Harry, waiting for the penny to drop. "Well?" He demanded.

Seeing Harry had not yet made the connection, Sirius intervened.

"What," he asked quietly, "is the difference in age between the two of you?"

Harry rubbed his forehead in confusion. "She's eleven months older than me, I think."

Sirius nodded. "Indeed. And how old are you Harry?"

Harry looked at his godfather as though he were crazy. "You know I'm twenty." Then the penny dropped. "Which means she's…Oh God, she's twenty-one. We missed her twenty first birthday." He breathed, green eyes wide.

Sirius shook his head in disbelief. "You did more than _miss_ her birthday. You completely _forgot_ the twenty-first birthday of your so-called best friend!"

Ron finally seemed to caught up. "Alright, so we missed it! It doesn't mean anything! People always forget birthdays! Did she have a whinge to you two about it, then? Typical! Can't even face us herself, hey?"

Sirius clenched his fists as his control slipped slightly. "No, Ronald, she did not ask us to speak to you! As a matter of fact, she begged us not to mention anything to you at all! And as to your excuse, yes, people forget birthdays at times, although not often of the ones they love. However, people _do not_ forget the twenty-first birthday of their so-called best friend! In fact, its tradition for a person's friends to organise a large party for their twenty first; however, you three have obviously started a new tradition- ignoring it altogether!"

Harry intervened. "I know it doesn't make up for it, but…maybe we can have dinner with her this week and wish her a happy birthday?"

Ginny turned to her fiancé with a practiced pout on her features.

"But Harry, our social calendar is full this week. Tonight we are having dinner at that new restaurant in Kensington, we've had those reservations for two weeks! And tomorrow night we have to open the new club in Mayfair! Everyone who's _anyone_ will be there, not to mention the press! Thursday night we promised the Prophet an interview at Florean Fortescue's, and we simply _can't _miss that- it shows the public we haven't forgotten our roots!" Remus snorted at that. She ignored the interruption and continued reciting the week's schedule. "Friday night we were going to have dinner with Ron and his new girlfriend, and Saturday night is our engagement party at _La Flamboise_!"

Harry nodded slowly. "At least, we'll see her on Saturday than."

An expression of distaste flickered across Ginny's expensively made up features. "Well, I suppose we can invite her, if you really want to-"

Here, she was cut off, not by one but by _three _different voices.

"You mean you weren't going to invite her in the first place?"

"What do you mean, if I really want to?"

"I wouldn't bother if I were you."

Ginny froze for a moment, trying to work out who had said what. Before she could utter a word, Tonks strode into the living room and stood directly in front of the couch.

"Hello children. Looks like I arrived just in time. Now, since the princess over there seems to have hit a stumbling block in her thought process, I'll repeat my question; you weren't going to invite your so-called best friend to your engagement party in the first place?"

Harry stared at her in shock, then turned to Ginny. "I…I thought we were. What do you mean, you'll invite her if I really want to? She should have been invited anyway!"

Ginny flushed under their collective scrutiny. "I…I just thought she might be little out of her depth at _La Flamboise_ and that it would be kinder to meet her separately. _You're_ all invited, of course. I just thought, you know, with the press there and everything, and Hermione being, well, you know…" She trailed off.

Sirius narrowed his eyes at her. "Do go on, Ginevra. With Hermione being _what_?"

Ron found his voice again. "Oy, don't you push her! Can't you she's stressed? Ginny's got a delicate temperament, she does!"

Tonks laughed harshly. "Delicate? Ginevra? In case you haven't noticed, Ronny dearest, your sister is about as delicate as a sledge hammer! I'm sure one itty-bitty little question won't make her swoon." Turning to the aforementioned delicate person, she smirked. "Well, Ginny? Answer Sirius' question! With Hermione being _what?"_

Harry frowned at her harsh manner, but turned to his fiancée to her hear reply.

Ginny cast around for the right words, "Well… you know, she _is_ very shy, and rather socially…awkward and she hates having her photo taken, not that I can blame her. And I don't want her to feel embarrassed because she doesn't know which knife and fork to use, and in front of all those important people, too! And…well, she'll ruin the photograph," she mumbled.

Sirius' control was now hanging on by a thread. "Did I just hear you say," he asked in a deadly tone, "that she would ruin the photograph?"

Ginny squirmed under his intense gaze. "You must understand, Sirius, that the press will be there and at least one or two photos will be printed in the society pages, and-"

Sirius cut her off. "DID. YOU. JUST. SAY. THAT. SHE. WOULD. RUIN. THE. PHOTOGRAPH?"

Ginny trembled and clung to Harry's arm. "Yes," she mumbled. "But you _know_ how she is, Sirius! She never takes any trouble with her appearance, and she'll simply turn up in just anything! In front of polite society! It would be far kinder to her not to ask her to try to function in that sort of environment!"

Harry turned to look at his fiancée in shock, whilst Ron had nodded agreement with everything she said.

"Too right, Gin! I should know, had to put up with her at school, didn't I? Her hair was always a bloody rat's nest, ink stains on her hands, no makeup, no style, nothing! And now with that bloody scar too, bet she forgets to glamour it."

Sirius' last thread of control snapped, and he stood and strode over to the couch. Grabbing the shocked redhead by the collar, he lifted and pinned him against the wall, ignoring Harry's cry of protest and Remus' plea for him to calm down.

"If you EVER say that again, Weasley so help me God, I will rip you apart with my bare hands! You utter _bastard!_ You complete and utter COWARD! She got those scars trying to protect you and Harry, she refused to give up ANY information so you could continue on if she died! She was preparing to DIE, she was gathering the last of her strength to blow up both herself and that mad bitch Bellatrix!" Here he heard Tonks gasp, and Remus' low murmurs of explanation as to what had happened at Malfoy Manor.

Sirius however, was focused only the idiot gibbering in terror in front of him. "She was under the _cruciatus_ for God knows how long, and she held out. God knows how! She fought to the bitter end! Those scars are BEAUTIFUL, they show just how strong and loyal and beautiful she is, inside and out! But they aren't the only scars she has, are they? There are scars on her soul that YOU carved there!"

The room was silent, except for Ron's whimpering.

Suddenly, Remus spoke. "Padfoot," he said softly. "Put him down. He's not worth it."

Sirius stood motionless for a moment, chest heaving, glaring at the redhead. Then he took a deep breath and, seeming to gain some control over himself, let the boy's feet slide to the ground.

He turned to look at Harry and Ginny, who stared at him in shock.

"Hermione Granger is more of a lady than you could ever hope to be, Ginevra Weasley," He growled. " For your information, yes, she knows which knife and fork to use, and contrary to your concerns, she does know how to dress appropriately. More importantly, she can converse on any number of topics, from spell development to current affairs. She is intelligent and beautiful and would grace any social occasion. However, more important still is the fact that she would _never_ stoop to putting down another person to make herself feel better. She is a noble soul, the true mark of a real lady. The same cannot be said of you."

Both Weasley's protested loudly at that, but fell silent at his glare.

Harry spoke up, anger evident in his voice. "Sirius, don't talk to Ginny like that."

Sirius turned and looked his godson straight in the eye. "And why not? Was there anything untrue in what I said? Is Hermione not a lady? Does she not possess those qualities? Was Ginevra not trying to ridicule Hermione to excuse her own behaviour?"

Harry's green gaze faltered, and he looked down at his lap. He said nothing for a few moments, much to Ginny's chagrin, then, to her relief suddenly looked up. Her relief, however, was short-lived when she heard his words.

"Sirius, how did you know about the scars?"

Sirius sighed. He was going to have to tread very carefully here. He did not want to embarrass Hermione, but, at the same time, he wanted the three to feel the full weight of what they had done.

"I saw them."

Harry tilted his head. Merlin, he looked like James when he did that. "But then how did you know who did it and that she was placed under the _cruciatus_? She never talks about it and she always wears a glamour."

"She showed me," was all he said.

Harry gaped at him. "She _showed_ you? How? She doesn't have a pensieve, nor do you." His eyes grew wider as the obvious answer struck him "Legilimency! She _let _you?" He gasped.

Sirius nodded tersely. The memory of what he had seen in her mind was fanning his anger into a white-hot flame.

"Yes, I saw, Harry! You don't need to know why. All that you need to know is that I saw, and I saw EVERYTHING! I saw how you treated her, all of you, and I was DISGUSTED!"

Harry responded angrily. "What do you mean, how we treated her? We were her friends, we stuck up for her! We fought a bloody troll for her! We stuck up for her when Malfoy and his goons called her that-that word! Where the bloody hell do you get off yelling at us for how we treated our friend when you weren't even there for most of it!"

Sirius growled. "Yes, I wasn't there for most of it, but the first time I saw that girl she was standing in front of you with her wand out, trying to save you from me thinking I was a bloody murderer! And that was _after_ you ruthlessly cut her out of your lives over a bloody BROOMSTICK, when all she was trying to do was make sure you were bloody safe!" He drew a deep breath and continued.

"I saw EVERYTHING, Harry! I saw how you would always take Ron's side whenever they fought! I saw how the two of you made fun of her intellect and studious nature, but you were perfectly willing for her to use those same traits to do your homework! I saw how she was the only one that stuck by you during that BLOODY tournament, she was the was only one who defended you! ISN'T THAT RIGHT, RONALD?" The redhead paled at the thought that Sirius had heard what he had said about Harry and his glory-seeking ways.

"She was the only one who helped you! I saw her teach you the summoning charm for hours at a time, I saw her try again and again to patch the rift between you and Ronald when all he could do was be jealous of your being entered in the competition. Isn't that right, RONALD?" The redhead nodded jerkily..

"I saw how when Ron came back, you two went off together as normal and Hermione was relegated to the background again! I saw how she received hate mail and was ridiculed by students constantly, not to mention that bastard Snape, and NO ONE DID ANYTHING. Even Molly Weasley believed that tripe that Skeeter wrote and gave Hermione the cold shoulder. Yes, I did see that was the one time you stuck up for her Harry.

I saw her dressed up and dancing, having a wonderful time at her first Ball, only for Ronald here to ruin it all for her. I heard him scream at her that she was an idiot to believe Krum would want to ask her to the Ball, that he was trying to get information on Harry and that nobody in their right mind would see her as anything other than a last resort!"

Harry was staring in shock at Ron, who wisely decided not to say anything.

"I saw how she tried and tried to sneak you letters during that wrteched summer after fourth year and Molly Weasley kept confiscating them, but you wouldn't hear her out when you arrived at Grimmauld Place! No, you went off your rocker and she took the blame! I saw how she tried to help you with that bitch Umbridge and you kept biting her head off. I saw her try to help you with your first relationship with a girl! I saw that she tried to stop you from falling headlong into the trap at the Department of Mysteries, but she went with you anyway and fought by your side until she was almost killed! I saw her try to look out for you when a potions book filled with nasty curses suddenly appears out of bloody nowhere! And it just happens to appear at a time when the nutter who killed your parents has followers wondering around who would be only to happy to knock you off! I saw how you ignored her and didn't defend her even when Ginevra here would publically attack her- but don't worry Ginevra, I'll get back to you in a moment."

He paused for a moment to draw breath, and continued.

"I saw her fight the night the school was attacked. I saw her tell you she would stick by your side after Albus' funeral- and then, Harry, I saw her DO it. I saw that whole seventh year! I saw her save your arses countless times! Whose compassion got Kreature to help you? Whose planning got the locket back? She even managed to get you out of the Ministry, Merlin alone knows how! She had an entire tent packed in her bag and supplies for every one! Even when Ronald here abandoned you for some nice home cooking, SHE STAYED WITH YOU! She saved your arse in Godric's Hollow when that filthy snake tried to murder you both, and she managed to get you both out of there about twenty seconds before that nutter Voldemort showed up! Who saved you AGAIN at the Lovegoods after Ronald had made his reappearance?

Who was captured and tortured-" His voice broke, but he pushed on regardless, "at the Malfoy's and was willing to die so you could escape? Who drank the polyjuice to turn into the crazy bitch who tortured her, risking the penalty of impersonating a Gringott's customer? Who escaped with you on a bloody dragon and followed you to Hogwarts? Who dueled Bellatrix? Who fought with you to the end? WHO?" He shouted the last word.

Harry was silent, staring at his godfather in shock.

Drawing in a deep breath, Sirius spoke quietly. "Who wiped her parents memories and sent them away so she could follow you to the bitter end?"

He turned to the two Weasleys. "Who was belittled and mocked by Ginevra and Ronald here about her appearance time and time again, and took it as no more than her due? Who was constantly told she was plain and unattractive and that the only way someone would be interested in her was if they didn't notice her looks at all? Who overheard time and time again what an embarrassment she was with her hideous looks? Who was told by the man she had feelings for that he had chosen someone else BECAUSE OF HER LOOKS and IN FRONT OF HIS ENTIRE FAMILY! How humiliated do you think she felt?"

He stepped back and encompassed all three in his burning gaze. "Who was ignored at Hogwarts while the war was over, with scarcely a letter sent to her? Who took care of everyone after the war, only for the rest of you to gradually phase her out of your lives? When was the last time you even saw her or spoke to her? You didn't even bother to remember her twenty-first birthday! Tell me, Harry, how was I wrong in what I said?

Harry hung his head in shame, unable to speak, whilst Ginny looked torn between rage and fear. Ronald simply looked furious.

When he was finally able, Harry lifted his head. "You're right, Sirius," he began in a small voice, ignoring the cries of protest from Ron and Ginny. He suddenly stood up and looked at Sirius. "I….I have to find her. I'll be back."

Before anyone could say a word, he had turned on the spot and disapparated.

Sirius shook his head and walking to his chair, sat down heavily.

Tonks stood watching in silence. She had Remus had let Sirius take control of the conversation because had he _needed_ to do so; his love for both Hermione and Harry would accept no less. Nevertheless, the pink haired auror had a few words of her own to add.

Before she could open her mouth, however, Harry returned, looking panicked.

"I can't find her! I can't get into her flat and the Deputy Head of the Department of Mysteries told me that she is no longer employed there!"

Sirius sighed, closing his eyes and rubbing his forehead. "Sit down, Harry."

"But Sirius, I have to find her! She could be-"

Remus cut him off, cold anger evident in his voice. "You won't find her."

"What do you mean I won't find her? Wait, is she visiting her parents?"

Remus laughed harshly. "I doubt it, but you're free to go and look."

Harry jumped up eagerly. "What's the address? Where do they live?"

"Freemantle Cemetery, in Perth, Australia." Sirius said quietly.

Harry sank back down onto the couch in shock. "What?"

Tonks spoke up. "They died in an car accident during the war. But of course, you knew that? She is your best friend- of course you knew her parents had died!"

Harry flinched at the venom in her tone.

"I…they're dead? But…why didn't she ever tell us?"

Tonks laughed mirthlessly. "When did you ever ask? You knew she had modified their memories and sent them to Australia before the Horcrux Hunt- did you ever bother to ask her if she found them when it was all over? Of course not. And she was so busy taking care of George and the rest of you that she didn't say a word. By the time George had recovered, she was hurt that NOT ONE of you had thought to ask after them, and decided that she wouldn't say a damn thing until you bothered to ask. And why should she?" Tonks scowled. "Friends don't have to chase their friends to care!"

Harry buried his head in his hands. "Oh God, all that time….I never knew."

Ginny, who had been remarkably quiet til now, sniffed. "I'm sad to hear about her parents, of course, but really, why all the drama? She should have said something!"

Tonks growled. "She didn't say anything because she was too bloody busy looking after everyone else, when nobody gave a DAMN about her! You think she didn't have nightmares about the war like the rest of us?"

Remus shook his head. "And WHEN would she have said anything after that? During the course of your flourishing correspondence with her at Hogwarts, Harry? Or during your many interactions, when you deigned to remember she existed, Ginny? Or perhaps during your many social outings? No? Or perhaps it should have been during the many conversations where you bothered to bloody ask about ANYTHING in her life!" He shouted.

Tonks patted him on the arm, trying to soothe him, whilst scowling at the three people in front of her.

Harry looked up. "Look, I know I- we- messed up. I know we've hurt her. I know we failed her! But please, tell me where she is- I have to see her! I need to apologise, I need to ask her forgiveness. Please, where is she?"

The room was silent. The moment had finally come.

Sirius answered him. "She's gone."

"What do you mean she's gone? Trying to cause a bit of drama, is she? Hiding somewhere, waiting for us to come running?" Unfortunately, Ron seemed to have found his voice again.

A glare from Tonks silenced him immediately.

Sirius ignored him and look directly at Harry. "She's gone, Harry- she's left England."

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_A/N: Sorry to leave it hanging but I just could not fit anymore into this chapter! It will continue in the next one, I promise!_


	10. Chapter 10: The Painful Truth

**Disclaimer: Only the plot belongs to moi. The rest is JKR's.**

_A/N: Hello lovely people! Here is the next instalment of the story, I hope you enjoy it! __The next chapter follows on immediately from this one, so don't worry, you won't miss anything._

_This chapter is dedicated to the very lovely Angelus Draco- thank you so much for all of your help! _

_Thank you so much to all you wonderful people who left reviews- it means so very much to me! Keep reading and reviewing!_

* * *

"Left England? Do-do you mean that she's gone on holiday?" Harry asked in desperation. "Can you tell us where she's gone?

Ron snorted. "That'd be about right- try and lay the guilt on us for ignoring her while she's gone off on holiday!"

Remus turned to the irritating redhead, his face white as he fought to keep his cool.

"Ronald, if you do not shut up immediately, I will cast a silencing charm on you. I suggest you keep your idiotic blather to yourself!" He snarled.

Tonks, seeing that her husband was in danger of losing control, walked over to his chair and sat on his lap. His arms slid tightly about her waist as he buried his face in her hair, breathing deeply. Her scent seemed to soothe the angry wolf in his mind, enabling him to relax slightly. He whispered a soft "Thank you, Dora" before taking a deep breath and looking at the irritating redhead, who quailed slightly.

"No, she has not gone on holiday. She has moved away. And before you even think of suggesting it, Ronald, it is not a ploy for attention. As Harry has learned, she no longer works at the Ministry and, had you been able to gain entry, you would have seen her flat is empty. She has left England entirely."

Harry blanched. "She's gone? For good?"

"Yes."

"B-but when? She…she was here when we left two weeks ago! How could she have moved abroad in that time?"

Sirius answered his godson. "She accepted a job offer abroad on her birthday and left the following day."

Harry stared. "She got an offer that quickly?"

Sirius barked a bitter laugh. "Harry, had you paid the slightest bit of attention to her life, you would have known that she was getting job offers every second day. She decided to accept this one because she believed she had nothing to stay for."

Harry's green eyes filled with tears. "How could she think that?"

Sirius shook his head tiredly. "How could she _not_? You pulled your little stunt, neither remembering her birthday nor asking her to accompany you on holiday with rest of your friends. Compounded with tolerating years of your neglect and poor treatment, and the fact that you didn't even bother to see or call her anymore, what was she supposed to think? She wasn't a part of your lives anymore, you'd made that clear enough. Her parents were dead and she had been offered a fantastic opportunity abroad, in a good position with an extremely generous salary. What did she have to stay for?"

Harry swallowed noisily, then asked in a hushed voice, "What about you? Does she still talk to you?"

Tonks took over. "She gave us portkeys to her new home and we are free to visit whenever we like. In fact, we spent the night there last night."

"Then you know where she is- you could take us there!" Harry exclaimed desperately, a look of hope dawning on his face.

Tonks snorted. "Not bloody likely!"

Harry looked crestfallen. "Why not?"

Ron stupidly decided to pipe up at this point. "Yeah, why not? Thought you were complaining that we don't pay her enough attention and all that. Now you won't tell us where she is? Make up your bloody minds!"

Remus scowled at Ron and, without a word, cast a silencing charm on him. The redhead began to flap his arms and wave about madly, but to no avail- he could not speak. The werewolf nodded in satisfaction and slipped his wand back into his pocket, then answered the question.

"Because, Harry she has forbidden us from telling any of you where she is, let alone taking you there. She has broken with you, all of you. I'm sure you noticed that you couldn't apparate into her flat?"

Harry nodded jerkily.

"She has removed your signatures from the wards entirely- you cannot apparate or portkey in, nor can you physically unlock the door. She has also blocked your Floo access, I believe."

Harry hung his head in defeat. "She's left us, then. She's finally done it."

Remus nodded. "Yes, she has, and I cannot say that I blame her. You pushed her out of your lives quite callously, after all. She grew tired of being an afterthought in your friendship, and so ended it in a dignified manner. She bears you no ill will- she simply wants nothing further to do with you."

At that, Sirius stood and strode out of the room. A few minutes later, he returned with three packages, which he gave to Harry, Ron and Ginny.

"She bought your Christmas presents early this year, and she asked me to take care of them. Let me be clear; these gifts are not a chance at reconciliation. She said I could throw them away or give them to you. I have chosen to give them to you, because I know she put a lot of thought into these gifts, and I would not waste her efforts."

Without a second thought, Harry tore off the wrapping paper on his gift and found two thick, leather-bound books. He heard Ginny snort next to him. "Books, what a surprise!" She muttered.

Harry ignored her and examined the books. The first was entitled "A Complete History of the Potter Family." Opening it, he saw that it was marked at the most recent entry- Harry James Potter- and contained a blurb of his deeds over the years. Flicking back through the book, he saw that it provided a brief history of each and every Potter to the time of Godric Griffyndor himself. Harry saw with amazement that Griffyndor had changed his daughter's name to Potter in the year 1041, due to the number of families intent on eradicating the Griffyndors. Elenor Gryffindor was the first Lady Potter, Head of House Potter. She later married Elfric of Thornberry, who became the Lord Elfric, Consort to the Head of House Potter. Harry felt a pull in his chest; here was the history of his family, the people he was bound to by blood.

He reluctantly closed the book and turned to the other; it appeared to be a large photo album. Opening it, he discovered that the title page bore the words '_The Wedding of Lily and James Potter, on the twenty ninth day of April, nineteen hundred and seventy nine_".

His breath caught; she had somehow gathered various photographs of his parents' wedding day. He felt tears prick his eyes as he looked at his laughing mother, evidently casting the _Aguamenti _charm at an irritated Alice Longbottom. The next was of a young Remus, chasing his father around the room with a white bowtie. Harry gazed at the pictures in amazement, feeling his throat close with emotion.

"She came to each of us and asked for all of our memories of Prongs and Lily's wedding," Sirius said quietly. "Merlin knows how many people she asked. She sat with us when we-when we found it difficult to try bring those memories to the surface." He smiled sadly. "She even brought us chocolate; she said as it was her fault we were depressed, it was her job to cheer us up. That was months ago, but she never told us what she wanted the memories for. She…she must have spent weeks preparing that album."

Harry noticed there were a number of blank pages toward the back of the album. A small label read simply "_The New Lord and Lady Potter_." He gulped at seeing Hermione's familiar, elegant hand and slowly closed the album, awash with emotion. He could not believe the trouble she had gone to in order to give him a really meaningful gift.

Sirius interrupted his thoughts. "What is in the other book?"

Harry wordlessly held out the Potter Histories, watching as Sirius flicked through the pages, his expression blank. After a time, he closed it and handed it back to Harry.

"This is more significant than you know, Harry," the older man told him. "This book will form a necessary part of the instruction on the Potter Title. I suspect she wanted to give it to you for Christmas so you would have time to ponder it before your twenty-first birthday."

Twenty-one was the traditional age at which a young lord or lady took up a vacant title and their place in the Wizenagamot. It was also the age at which said lord or lady could refuse the title, in which case a proxy would be appointed until such time as the next heir was of age.

Harry shook his head slowly. "She cared so much, and I….I never saw it. How did I miss that?"

Remus shook his head. "Probably because you were so preoccupied with those who constantly demanded your attention that you never noticed quiet, hard-working Hermione in the background. You see it now, though, don't you? Now that it's too late?"

Harry closed his eyes briefly, then opened them, blinking quickly to dispel the tears in his green eyes. "Yeah, I do. For all the good does, I see it."

Ginny interrupted the poignant moment. "Oh, please! This is just another one of her attention seeking ploys! She's done it before, you know!"

Harry looked at her in confusion. "She's done what before? Given us gifts and moved to another country? Gin, I may have been a complete and utter arse when it came to Hermione, but believe me, even I would remember that!"

Ginny rolled her eyes. "_No_, darling. I mean that this is not the first time she's played the 'poor me' card to try and get people to notice her."

Harry just stared at her, before Tonks interrupted.

"Oh, is that so, Ginevra? Please, do share! Please enlighten us as to the details of these attention-seeking ploys!"

Ron scowled at her tone, unable to say a word. Tonks ignored him and focused on Ginny.

"Well?"

Ginny flushed slightly under the pink-haired woman's scrutiny. "Well, I caught her once in the Astronomy Tower at some ungodly hour of the night, in her seventh year, crying over some old photos. Please! It was SO obvious that she wanted someone to find her!"

Sirius narrowed his eyes at the arrogant girl. "The Astronomy Tower at Midnight, you say? Seems a bit of an odd time to try and get some attention, considering everybody else was likely sleeping! As to the photos, I don't suppose you bothered to _look_ at them, did you?"

Ginny shook her head, a little intimidated by the intensity in Sirius' eyes.

He snorted. "Of course you didn't! Why should you? You never gave a damn about her before, why start now? For your information, those were photographs of her parents- whom she had just recently discovered had died overseas, with their memories wiped, never even knowing they had a daughter! Ever think she might have wanted some time to grieve? She was hardly going walk into the Great Hall and announce the bloody fact, was she?"

Ginny flushed with embarrassment. "I….I didn't think of that."

Tonks snorted. Her muttered "ooooh, big surprise, that" was clearly audible to everyone.

Ginny looked pleadingly at Harry to try and get her out of the unexpectedly sticky situation she found herself in, only to find him looking sadly at the gift Hermione had given him. This, in addition to what had already happened, proved to be too much for the volatile redhead.

"See! She's doing it again! She's not even _here_ and you're paying more attention to her than to me! I'm your fiancée, for heaven's sake; why aren't you defending _me_ against _them _and their accusations instead of looking at the _bloody_ books your swotty friend left for you before she away like a child! And you're still trying to tell me she's noble and not seeking attention? Please!"

Harry stared at her in shock. "Ginny…why would you say that? That was uncalled for…"

His fiancée, seeing she had his attention and realising she might have gone a little too far, decided to take the opportunity to do some damage control.

"Oh Harry, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to sound cruel, b-but they were all ganging up on me. It's just too much for me!" She said tearfully, lip quivering in a practised tremble."

Tonks decided she had had enough. Sirius had played his part- now it was her turn. Jumping out of Remus' lap, she marched over to the red-haired drama queen and stood directly in front of her.

"Cut the crap Ginny, we all know you're faking it to avoid looking like the self-centred bitch you are!"

Ginny gasped. "Harry, are you going to let her talk to me like that?"

Harry turned to Tonks, disapproval clear on his face. "Tonks, I know Ginny has said some things that are out of line, but you shouldn't talk to her like that."

Tonks snorted in amusement. "You're bloody joking, right? What happened to the tearful remorse from a few minutes ago? But then, you did think about it for a _few_ minutes- I'm surprised you lasted even that long."

"What?"

Tonks rolled her eyes in disgust. "You treat Hermione like shit, and let everyone else get away with bad-mouthing her, then you tell off the people who bloody try to do something about it! Good to see you're being true to form, Harry! Thank God Mione moved away- she deserves better!"

Harry looked as though she had slapped him. Tonks didn't stop, but continued delivering a few home truths.

"You, Ginny, are a world-class manipulative, selfish, little bitch. " She seethed, ignored Harry and Ron's looks of shock and anger.

"Tell me, Ginny, why exactly did you find it necessary to constantly belittle Hermione in public? Why did you suddenly forget all she had done for you and decide to make her into a laughingstock? Why did you erode her self-esteem so deliberately that she hated her very _self_?"

"I…I..didn't," Ginny stammered. "I never…..I…..Harry?"

Tonks turned to Harry before he could open his mouth. "Just a few minutes ago, you admitted that you and the others had been lousy friends to Hermione. Now someone is saying untrue and hurtful things about her. Are you going to keep choosing their side and let them continue to slander her, even now when she is not here to defend herself? Because let me tell you, even if you will, I bloody well won't! I've seen what you've all done to that girl and it will take months, maybe years to undo!"

Harry nodded shamefacedly and kept silent, causing Ginny to screech indignantly. "I haven't done anything! What lies has she been telling you? Bring her here and I'll fling them in her face!"

Sirius snarled, "Lies?" just as Tonks growled, "Do you think I'd be stupid enough to bring her anywhere _near_ you after what you've done, you poisonous little bitch? Did you think you wouldn't get caught?"

Harry looked up at Tonks in shock. "What…what are you talking about? What are you saying?"

Ginny, who had suddenly paled, turned to her fiancée. "It's all lies, you must believe me Harry! I haven't done anything!"

Harry ignored her pleading, patting her on the hand, and asked again. "What are you talking about, Tonks?"

Tonks looked him in the eye. "Potions."

Sirius jumped out of his chair, his face suddenly white. "Potions? What potions? Why didn't you tell me before?"

Remus had also risen from his chair; in direct contract to Sirius' visible agitation, he was quiet, seemingly calm. One look at his clenched jaw and fists, however, dispelled that idea entirely. The man was trembling, and only his immense willpower was stopping him from letting the wolf lose.

"What potions?" he rasped. Tonks inwardly winced. It seemed that the wolf was very close to the surface. She would have to tread carefully here or else Moony would come out to play, and she somehow doubted that he would have much liking for his current playmates.

Turning to her trembling husband and her cousin, she addressed them both. "I only found out this morning, after you had already left. I mentioned a few things to Mum so she decided to perform certain other scans. I will tell you, but I ask you to trust me. Please?"

The two men nodded warily.

She drew in a deep breath. "I'm going to ask you both to sit down and give me your wands. I…I don't want to restrain either of you, but I will if I have to. You're neither of you any good to Mione if you're in Azkaban."

Both men sighed, and then reluctantly surrendered their wands before sitting down in their respective chairs.

Tonks tucked the wands in her back pocket, muttering "Sorry, Mad-Eye". Taking her own wand, she pointed it at Ron. The redhead sat frozen.

"I'm going to take the silencing charm off you. However, one rude comment or even an interruption and it goes back on again. Is that understood?" A fervent nod answered her.

"Good".

Taking a deep breath, she removed the charm, then turned her gaze back to Sirius and Remus. "Mum found heavy traces of the _Humilitas_ potion in Mione's system.

Sirius thundering "WHAT?" was matched by Remus' roar. Both men leaped out of their chairs, however, Tonks was too quick. With a few flicks of her wand she bound and levitated them back to their chairs.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't want to have to do that, but Mione comes first, and she needs us."

Turning back to the couch, she found Harry frowning in puzzlement at the Marauder's vehement reaction. "You have a question, Harry?"

"Er…yeah, sorry, but what is the _Humilitas_ potion? I was never much good at potions, but I don't remember it being on the list of prohibited or controlled potions from auror training…"

Tonks drew a deep breath and tried to remain calm. Every time she thought of Hermione being subjected to this potion, it made her blood boil. A quick glance at Remus showed that the wolf had taken over his conscious mind- his eyes were pure amber and he was growling.

Sirius was sitting fuming in his chair, his fists clenched so tightly his nails had probably broken the skin.

_Looks like I bound them just in time_, she sighed, half-wishing she could let them loose to wreak a little havoc on the two red-heads.

Clearing her throat, she turned back to Harry and a very pale, trembling Ginny.

"That's because it isn't. It's considered an ordinary medicinal potion by many pureblood families, most often used to knock teenagers down a peg or two if they become too unbearable. Heck, Dumbledore suggested Lucius Malfoy take it, once, when he was a student at Hogwarts. However, even those families who do not approve of that kind of emotional tampering are certainly _aware_ of the potion.

The _Humilitas_ potion was developed during the reign of Napoleon, and its use spread across Europe almost immediately. As its name suggests, it is a humility draft. The potion is ordinarily administered in very small doses and only when strictly necessary. Usually, the person is given a maximum of two drops of the _diluted_ draught for a certain period of time. It is generally administered for no longer than a year and the person must be carefully observed, usually by a Healer, during that time. If the dose is too high, or too frequent, it can have terrible effects on the person's mind- instead of merely being humble, they begin to doubt themselves to an extreme, followed by terrible self-loathing and a distorted self-perception. The effects of the _Humilitas_ potion are lasting; it does not wear off. Its leaves strong traces in the blood, which can be removed with an extremely powerful neutralising potion. The neutraliser can't reverse the psychological damage that has already been inflicted. That takes considerable time and effort."

Harry's eyes grew wide. "And Hermione had this…this potion in her system?"

Ginny tried to interrupt, glaring angrily at Tonks. "Of course not! She couldn't have! This is just another ploy to-" She stopped speaking suddenly as a loud growl was heard from the other side of the room.

Everyone looked to find Remus thrashing against the bonds in his chair and snarling. "You lie, human! I smell it. Do not attack our mate - we will not allow it!" Turning his amber eyes to Tonks, his face softened slightly and he stopped thrashing. "Continue, beloved Mate. We will control our instincts."

Tonks looked lovingly at the werewolf for a moment before turning back to the subject of her ire. "As I said, Mum found considerable traces of the potion. It seems that not only was Mione fed the potion without her consent, but mum estimates she was given with the potion weekly, in doses containing five drops or more, for a period of up to two years. There was so much of the stuff left in her system, even after all this time, the scan was practically going mad."

Sirius growled and tried, unsuccessfully to get up from his chair, glaring daggers at the white-faced chit in front of him. Remus had not moved, but had been watching the couch with all the intensity of a hunter, eying his prey and biding his time.

Tonks glared at the redhead in front of her. "Someone was dosing Hermione with a potion commonly known to purebloods, one that most half-bloods and muggleborns have never heard of. Even if she had heard if it, Hermione would not have taken it voluntarily- that means someone slipped it to her without her knowledge. Any ideas who it might be? Someone who wanted Harry for herself and decided Hermione was too close, perhaps?"

Ron spoke up angrily, whilst keeping a watchful eye on the two men bound to their chairs. "You can't prove it was Ginny!"

Tonks glared at him until he shut up.

"You're right, we can't- yet. But if Ginny here is innocent all she has to do is swear a magical oath that she had nothing to do with this and we can let it be. Ginny?"

Ginny stared at the pink-haired woman in shock. "You…you can't be serious. I haven't done anything wrong, w-why should I be forced to swear an oath?

Ron nodded vehemently. "Not like it was poison, was it? What does it matter who gave it to her? Only a humility potion! Reckon she probably needed it too! If that was what she was like after two years of the stuff, Merlin knows what she would have been like without it!" He shuddered. "Bloody bossy know-it-all."

Tonks saw red at that moment.

"What does it matter? It matters because two drops of that potion for more than a few months is more than most pretentious pricks need to turn into a half decent human being! What do you think it would do to someone with an already dangerously low self-esteem? Someone who was fed huge doses of that stuff for two years? It turned her against herself and warped her bloody perception! She hates herself so much, her mind convinced her she didn't deserve to eat! It matters because, thanks to the potions princess here, she is lying in a potion-induced sleep in her bed! It matters because she's been that way since early yesterday evening! It matters because her bloody magical core was bloody draining her so much she could have died or turned into a squib! If Sirius hadn't found her when he did, who knows what would have happened? THAT'S WHY IT MATTERS!"

She stood glaring at the redheads, chest heaving from her outburst, before turning to Harry.

The young man looked as though he had been punched in the gut. "She…she's unconscious? She won't eat? Oh God, is she dying?"

Seeing Tonks shake her head in negation, he sighed in relief and then turned to his fiancée. "Ginny, Ginny please, swear the oath for me. I'm begging you to do it for my sake, please! Put my mind at ease!"

The redhead looked as though she were going to faint. "Harry, no, it's not fair for you to ask that of me…I-I've done nothing wrong….."

Tonks pounced. "If you've done nothing wrong, then you can swear that bloody oath right now. Otherwise, I'll report it officially and get permission to question you under Veritaserum. Your comments have shown that you had a clear motive to administer it, and your grades show that you possess the skill to brew it. Not to mention thanks to your pureblood background, you would have no doubt been aware of its existence. So what's it going to be Ginny, the easy way or the hard way?"

Harry turned to the woman at his side, openly pleading. "Please, Ginny, I've done whatever you've asked of me. All I'm asking for is one lousy oath! Please!"

Ginny looked around in a panic, trying to find a way out of the situation she was in, but could find none. Her fiancé was on one side, pleading with her to give the oath, her brother sat gaping uselessly on the other, whilst an enraged auror stood in front of her. She finally bowed her head, defeated.

"I…I can't swear the oath."

Harry drew back in shock. "Ginny? Please tell me you didn't do this, tell me you didn't do it to Mione!"

"I had to!" She cried tearfully. "She was always so full of herself and-and you spent so much time with her! When she began to fancy you in fourth year, I had to make sure she didn't take you! You were mine, you've always been mine! I th-thought that if I took her down a peg or two she would never have the confidence to try to take you from me."

Sirius roared with rage and struggled fruitlessly to get out of his bonds. "You bitch! _Full_ of herself? You have no idea what you've done, you stupid selfish little girl! I was in her mind and the things I saw… she had no self-esteem at all from the age of bloody five onwards! The rubbish you gave her found nothing to wear away, and it made her hate herself! HATE, do you understand? I SAW what it did, and coupled with your disgusting mistreatment and neglect of her, oh God, I could kill you for what you've done to her! You damn near killed her for your petty jealousy!"

Harry was shaking his head, unable to believe what he was hearing. Ginny grabbed his hand, staring at him in desperation.

"Harry? Harry! You still love me, don't you! You won't let them hurt me?"

He shook off her hand and stood up from the couch.

Looking hard at the woman in front of him, Harry shook his head in disbelief.

"I…I can't believe you would…..and to Mione- Of all people! She never did anything to hurt anyone! Who ARE you?"

Ginny looked as if he had slapped her. "Harry…Harry, how can you say

that? You know me, of course you know! It's me, it's Ginny, your fiancée! I'm the woman you love!"

Harry's face became hard. "No, you're not. The woman I proposed to could never have done this. Did she ever exist? Or did you just make her up to try and win me over?"

Ginny began to sob. "No, no of course not, Harry! Darling, you know I love you! Please don't leave me! I swear, I never meant to hurt anyone! I just didn't want to lose you!"

Ron glared at Harry and put his arm around his sister, trying to comfort her, but thankfully did not speak. Harry ignored him.

"So you decided to dose my best friend with potions, without her consent! How often did you spike her drink? Well? ANSWER ME!"

Ginny trembled. "I…I didn't put it in her drink. I…put it directly in her food." She mumbled.

Harry stared at her. "In her food? Why?"

Ginny mumbled something that only Remus heard.

Tonks scowled at her. "Speak up! Why her food?"

Quailing under the gaze of the furious auror, Ginny dropped her eyes. "I...I was afraid that if I put it in her drink, the water would dilute it. I used the straight potion s-so it would be effective."

Sirius literally roared. "Are you MAD? You put dangerously high

doses of a concentrated potion in her food? It would have been absorbed four times as quickly and coursing through her blood stream within an hour! And it was UNDILUTED? You know damn well that for each drop of that potion a quarter of a goblet of water must be added to weaken the draught! Even bloody Napoleon would have given up the throne and gladly herded sheep after three months of your regimen! You could have killed her!"

Ron was unable to keep quiet any longer. "Oy, lay off! It was a harmless potion and she didn't mean to hurt her! There's no need to charge anyone!"

Tonks shook her head, intently watching the redheaded girl in front of her.

"I want Mione tested for other potions – God knows what else she could have been spiked with! If there is ANYTHING else, Ginny, I'll take you in myself."

If possible, Ginny turned even paler.

"Stop trying to scare her!" Ron raged. "She never gave her anything else!"

Tonks scoffed. "Oh, and you would know that how Ronald? If she slipped

one potion in her food, she could easily have slipped in others!"

"She didn't, I saw her only put in that one!" he screamed, then stopped, a horrified look on this face.

Tonks was regarding him with a grim look of satisfaction. "Somehow, I

suspected as much. Tell me, Ronald, just how often did you see Ginevra

adding potions to Hermione's food?"

"I…I didn't mean….I didn't know she was….Harry mate, you don't believe…" Ron stuttered, unable to find the right words to rid him of this mess.

Harry looked as though he were going to be sick. He didn't answer.

Tonks turned to Ron. "I'll give you the same chance I gave her; swear a magical oath that you had no knowledge of or complicity in these events and you'll be fine. If you refuse, I'll get permission to test you with Veritaserum- and who knows what else might come tumbling out of your eloquent gob?"

The redhead was shaking. "I….come on, you can't be serious! Why should I give an oath just because my sister made a little mistake?"

Sirius strained at his unseen bonds again. "Little mistake! Have you lost whatever mind you had, boy? Your sister could have killed Hermione! It's a bloody miracle that she was so devoted to her friends and family and to the cause! If she hadn't been such a selfless person, making her first priority her friends and family, she could easily have decided to throw herself of the Astronomy Tower! Bloody hell, if she had thought about herself half as much as you two do, she would have been dead! She was already starting to starve herself- which seems to coincide with the time you dealt the killing blow to your friendship! "

He drew a deep breath. "Swear that oath, Weasley, and swear it now or I will see to it you are questioned under Veritaserum immediately."

Ron looked first to Harry, then to his sister for help. Seeing none, he shrugged. "Alright, I knew she was doing it. I didn't know it could kill anyone- Ginny just said it would knock her bloody nose out of the air a bit- always walking around as if she were better than the rest of us. I thought it was a good idea. I was worried she had too much influence over Harry, and after all, he belonged to Gin, so…I helped. I would switch the laced sugar quills with the ones she kept in her bag. Harry mate, you have to believe me, I did it for you!"

Harry glared at his first friend. "You did it for me, Ron? Or you did it so you could stop feeling so inadequate without having to actually do something about it? Somehow, I don't see you putting potions in Mione's food as a token of friendship!"

Ron blanched.

Harry turned to face Sirius, his head bowed. "And now we-we've lost her," He choked. "I take responsibility for my own part in that- it's just as much my fault as it is theirs. I never stopped them from hurting her with their words or their actions. I never stood up for her. I never appreciated all she did for me, what she was prepared to do. I pushed her away and took her for granted and now she's gone. I-" He broke off as a sob escaped him, then continued shakily.

"I know I don't deserve her friendship, and I don't ask for it. But please, if you see her, tell her how sorry I am. Tell her I hope she's happy and that she deserves the best, someone who won't trade her friendship for glamour and designers and parties, someone who puts her first."

Sirius looked at Tonks. She nodded and flicked her wand , releasing both Sirius and Remus, passing Sirius his wand. He stood and slowly walked to his godson, putting his arms around the younger man and letting him sob. Meanwhile, Tonks had returned to Remus' lap, cuddling into the werewolf, who once again sniffed her hair.

"Harry, do you mean that? Do you fully accept responsibility for your actions?" Sirius asked quietly.

Harry nodded, sniffing. "I do. I-I need some time alone, to think through all of this, and decide what I'm going to do. But after, when I'm ready, can I…talk to you, Padfoot?"

Sirius smiled down at him. It was a small smile, but a smile nonetheless.

"Of course you can, Harry. I've told you before- I love you as if you were my own son, and have done since you were placed in my arms as a baby. I won't lie to you, I am disgusted and disappointed at what you have done, but I am proud that you have decided to take responsibility for those actions like a man. It has come at a very high cost, but you have learned a very valuable lesson. Take your time to think, settle back into work, and when you are ready, call me on the mirror. You still have it, don't you?"

Harry bobbed his head.

"Good. Then when you are ready, call me and we can talk. If you want to meet in person, let me know and I will arrange to come to you."

Harry glanced nervously at his godfather. "Will you be…you know…over there? With Mione?"

Sirius nodded warily.

"Good. I'll do that then. Just…please…do one thing for me?"

Sirius exhaled heavily, "Harry I cannot undo the past. What you have done is done, and you must accept the consequences of those actions."

Harry shook his head violently. "Not that. I don't expect or want you to ask Mione to forgive me. I just….I was wondering if you'd let me know how she is? Just…that she's out of danger, with the potions and everything."

At this, Ginny made a slight sound of distress. Everyone ignored her.

Thinking for a moment, Sirius agreed. "Alright, I'll let you know when she's awake, and on the mend. I will not do more than that. I will not approach her on your behalf, am I clear? I will not hurt her, not even for you, Harry."

A whisper of a smile ghosted across Harry's face. "I wouldn't ask you to, I think I've hurt her more than enough. You…you really care about her, don't you?"

"Of course," Sirius replied without thought.

Harry tilted his head thoughtfully for a moment, looking at his godfather. Then he sighed and turned to Remus and Tonks. He was relieved to see that Remus had calmed slightly. Tonks was looking at him consideringly- perhaps she was not so very furious with him now?

He took a deep breath. "Moony, Tonks, I…I owe you both an apology. Not only for how I acted today when you told me things I needed to hear, but for Teddy. I'm his godfather and I've neglected him shamefully. I've been so preoccupied with...with my own life this past year that I haven't been there for him. I…I'm sorry for that. I know I don't deserve it, but I would love another chance to make things right. I understand if you don't want me to be Teddy's godfather anymore but I…thought I should tell you."

After a moment of tense silence, Tonks spoke. "We appreciate that Harry. Like Sirius, we are beyond disgusted with what you did to Mione. The fact that you are taking responsibility for you actions, though, gives me hope that maybe you've learned your lesson. But it's not us you should be apologising to- it's Teddy. He's the one whose trust you need to regain. He is your godson after all."

Harry closed his eyes in relief. "Thank you. It's….more than I deserve, but thank you. I won't let you down, I swear it. I… would like some time with Teddy. Maybe…if you want to visit Mione abroad, and you wanted someone to watch Teddy….? He left the sentence unfinished, not wanting to push his luck.

Tonks nodded. "Thanks for the offer, but it will be up to Teddy. Once you've seen him and apologised, we'll see."

Harry nodded. He knew he would have to work hard to earn their trust back. He suddenly saw Remus looking at him from around Tonks' shoulder. Thank Merlin, his eyes had returned to their usual blue. He still looked strained though, as if he were fighting to keep control.

The pale werewolf looked hard at him for a moment, as if taking his measure, then nodded.

"You are beginning to learn, cub," he rasped, his throat obviously raw. "You have learned a very harsh and costly lesson- see that you don't repeat it." Trying to smile, the tired man looked at Harry. "You are family, Harry, nothing will change that. I've known you since the day you were born, and I love you. But, like Sirius, when you've done something wrong, I won't pretend otherwise. Take your time to think and you know that Tonks and I are also here should you wish to talk."

Harry smiled at the older man, and striding over, gave him a firm hug. Turning to Tonks, who smiled at him, he hugged her too as he whispered, "Thanks for caring enough to help me pull my head out of my arse. You could have just hexed me and cast me out. Thanks for giving me another chance."

Tonks patted him on the shoulder as he drew back. "You manned up and took responsibility. That takes guts. Don't think I won't hex your arse from here back to the Riviera if I think you deserve it, though. You've lost someone very precious Harry; don't lose anymore."

Harry sighed and nodded. "For what it's worth, Tonks, I know. I'm already feeling it, and something tells me it's only going to get worse. No one will ever be able to take Mione's place and I have no one but myself to blame."

Tonks scowled and turned to the two cowering Weasleys. They had both been sitting in absolute silence, afraid to draw the slightest attention to themselves. They flinched to find Tonks' glare fixed on them.

"Oh, I think can agree that while you bollocksed it up, these two did far more damage. I'm not sure what I'm going to do with them yet."

Harry cast his eyes down. "It's up to you. I won't interfere."

Ginny gasped. "Harry! You don't mean that! You wouldn't let them harm your fiancée and your best friend?"

Harry laughed bitterly. "No, I wouldn't." Their relieved sighs proved premature, however as he continued. "But then, you aren't the woman I proposed to, are you?

Ignoring Ginny's small scream and the sobs that followed, he drew a deep breath and turned to Ron.

"I don't know what to say to you. You were my first friend, my best mate. I always put you first, always trusted you. I'm just as guilty as you are of treating Hermione poorly and taking her for granted but this! To find that you could do _this_ to our best friend, a woman who has never done anything but stand by you…and then to find out you're apparently trying to manipulate me behind my back, and that you've apparently been madly jealous of me for years...I don't... I don't think they even have words to describe what I'm feeling right now. Although I guess I asked for it when you had already abandoned me so many times and I still trusted you over her. I don't know what to think about you, about our friendship. I need time, time away from both of you before I can even think what to do."

Sobbing, Ginny reached out to Harry. "Harry...don't! I love you!"

Harry just shook his head. "I mean it, Ginny. You did something I would never have thought you capable of. I need time to sort it out in my mind. I can't carry on as if nothing has happened, because quite frankly, right now, you are a stranger to me."

Ginny gasped and began to sob all the more.

Ron gulped loudly. "Mate...you can't let a silly thing like this come between us! We've been best mates forever!"

Harry glared. "The fact that you seem to think that putting mind-altering potions in people's food, let alone our best friend's food, is 'just a little thing' scares me. The Ron I knew would never have even considered it!"

Standing back, he sighed. "I don't pretend to be innocent in this. I screwed up, and lost the most devoted and loyal friend a man could have because of it. But what you did is _beyond_ cruel- it's criminal. So I'll say it again: I will not stand in the way of whatever course of action Sirius and the others choose to take."

Turning to look at his godfather, he tried to smile. "Looks like I'm finally getting it through my thick skull. Better late than never, right?"

Nodding at two Marauders and Tonks, he turned on the spot and disapparated.

Ginny stared in shock at the place he had been standing on only moments before, then suddenly wailed, throwing herself at her brother.

"He's gone!" She sobbed.

Ron patted her on the back whilst looking warily at the three across the room.

"What...what are you going to do to us?" He managed to stutter.

Tonks snorted. "What's the matter, Ronald? Surely you're not scared?"

Sirius walked purposefully back to his char and sat down, his grey eyes fixed on the quivering duo in front of him.

"That," he said quietly, "depends."

Ron gulped. "On what?"

"On Hermione. I won't have her name dragged through the mud and force her to sit through charges and trials without asking her permission first. She's suffered enough!"

Ron began to panic. "But Sirius, mate, you can't press charges! Bad press like that could lose me my job! They could terminate the contract for jeopardising the name of the team!"

Sirius said nothing.

Seeing that his pleas had left Sirius unmoved, Ron struck out desperately with the last hope he had.

"You know that it won't stick, yeah?" He gulped. "I mean, the Wizenagamot will never convict two purebloods for potioning a muggleborn. Th-they'll just cover it all up."

A loud, scornful laugh rang out. "Is that really the best you have, Weasley?" Tonks jeered. "I wouldn't count on that saving your arse bec-" She suddenly fell silent as Sirius held up his hand.

Straightening in his chair, Sirius spoke. "I think you forget that Hermione is a renowned war heroine, and a brilliant witch in her own right- I doubt that they will dismiss the claims so readily, especially when the Boy Who Lived fails to speak on your behalf. However, there is one thing you have forgotten- the Wizenagamot may ignore the plight of a muggleborn witch, but they will not ignore a complaint lodged by Noble House."

Ginny, who had stopped sobbing and was now sniffling on her brother's shoulder spoke up.

"Hermione is not a member of a Noble House."

Sirius nodded. "True, she is not. But she is, as of this moment, under the protection of the House of Black. Any insult or harm to her will be considered as an attack on the House of Black. Do I make myself clear?"

The two Weasleys nodded in shock. Being purebloods, knew exactly what that meant. Hermione was now untouchable, and their fate rested in her hands. If she decided to alert the DMLE, nothing would stop them from being convicted.

Ginny buried her head in her hands, whilst silently trying to think of a way to come out of this with her reputation intact and regain some lost ground. _If the press got hold of anonymous information that pointed to the know-it-all being mentally unstable, it might be enough to stop anything else being believed_, she thought.

It seemed, however, that Sirius was one step ahead of her.

"I invoke _familiasecretum_ over this matter as a whole. As Hermione is under the protection of the Black family, this matter is Black family business.

The matter of Hermione's illness, her self-loathing and the fact that she had been tortured could easily be used to paint a damaging picture which could severely discredit any complaint she might choose to make. You will not speak of anything discussed here today to anyone, even between yourselves, unless expressly permitted by myself or Hermione. I, Lord Black, in the presence of Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks-Lupin, do so bind you."

There was a blue flash as Sirius' magic bound the two Weasleys. Ginny deflated, knowing the power of the ancient family magic. There was nothing she could do to save herself from this- she was now at the mercy of Sirius and Hermione.

_Damn you, Hermione! _She thought. _Even now that I'm finally rid of you, you still took Harry from me!_

Sirius stood. "I have nothing further to say to you at this point. You will be contacted by the appropriate authorities should Hermione choose to press charges." Touching his wand to his Head of House ring, he continued. "You are no longer welcome in my home, or in any property I own. I suggest you leave immediately or in precisely two minutes the wards will forcibly remove you."

Ron and Ginny scrambled up from the couch, pale-faced, and ran out of the room. Seconds later, the front door slammed.

Sirius turned to look at the other two. "That went well," he quipped, trying to smile.

Remus sighed tiredly. "I think it went about as well we could expect it to. If nothing else, Harry came to his senses. I sincerely hope he cuts all ties with those two."

Tonks nodded emphatically. "He'd be well shot of them. To be honest, Ginny gives me the creeps. Ron is just a selfish git with no scruples, but Ginny- she's the schemer. To cold-heartedly plan and execute something like that..." She trailed off.

Turning to Sirius, she grimaced. "Sorry I sprang it on you like that Sirius- I swear, I only found out from mum about ten minutes before I left. I was telling her my suspicions about Ginny wanting to get Hermione away from Harry, and she reckoned that if Ginny was that desperate, she might have resorted to potions. She did a scan and found traces of two potions. She was able to identify that bloody _Humilitas_ potion, but she's still trying to work out what the other one is. I think she's going to ask Mione for a blood sample when she wakes up."

Sirius sighed. "I did wonder when you started talking about other potions..."

Standing up, he checked his watch and noticed it was already quarter to one, which made it quarter to two in Italy.

He turned to the other two. "I'm going to pack a few more things and then head back to Mione's flat. She could be waking up anytime now and I want to be there."

"Of course, Padfoot. We'll go with you," Remus told him.

Fifteen minutes later, Sirius slipped his shrunken suitcase into his pocket and strolled into the living room. He slipped his hand into his pocket and touched the portkey, about to activate it, when a voice echoed through the living room.

"Hello? Sirius, are you there?"

Walking to the fireplace, he saw George's solemn face looking back at him.

"George, what's the matter?"

"Can I come through?" The redhead asked. "Harry's just been to see me before taking off Merlin knows where. He...he told me about Hermione. If you have a moment, I was hoping I could talk to you."

Sirius quickly conferred with Remus, then turned back to George. "Look, mate, I really have to go. Moony and Tonks are here, they'll explain everything. If you need me for anything, Moony knows how to reach me."

George nodded and disappeared from the fireplace.

Sirius nodded at Moony and Tonks. "Good luck." With that, he activated his portkey and was gone.

A mere two minutes later, George came tumbling out of the fireplace, clutching two small parcels.

The tall redhead turned to the Lupins. "Harry stopped by the shop a little whilst ago. He said that things had ...happened, and that Hermione had left. I couldn't believe it, so I tried to apparate into her flat but the wards wouldn't let me in. Kept winding up in the hallway outside her door. Found these there, by the way," he told Remus, handing him the two packages. Remus did not glance at them, but simply shrunk them and put them into his pocket.

Tonks looked at her husband, who nodded, then back at George. "Might as well take a seat George, this is might take a while."

George simply nodded and walked over to sit on the couch his siblings had occupied not long before.

Looking up at them, he asked, "What the hell is going on?"

* * *

_Hermione's flat, Roma: 2.05pm local time_

Arriving in the Atrium, Sirius removed his shrunken suitcase and resized it. Stowing his portkey inside, he sent the case floating back to the guestroom he was currently using.

Making his way quietly to Hermione's room, he saw Andromeda sitting in an armchair next to Hermione's bed. Nodding at her, he turned his glance back to Hermione. She was still asleep, although it seemed to be a very fitful kind of sleep, he noted. Gesturing to Andromeda to follow him, he walked out of the room and into the living room. Seating himself on the couch, he waited until she was also seated before asking, "How is she?"

Andromeda frowned. "The sleeping draught still isn't working as well as I would have liked, although she hasn't woken since I administered it. I suspect she'll be awake soon." She sighed. "I don't want to give her any more sleeping draughts as I would prefer that she try to sleep naturally.

Her magical core seems to be slowly recovering, largely due to the nutrient potions and the rest she has had since last night. I would suggest that she remain in bed for the rest of the day, and possibly tomorrow. At the very least, I don't want her to exert herself for the next few days. Going to work is absolutely prohibited for at least a week, as I explained to _Signore _Martinelli when he called in an hour or so ago. He perfectly happy for her to take any time she needed in order to recover. She is also to follow the diet I gave Nymphadora, starting today."

Pausing, she raised an eyebrow. "I presume she told you about the potions?"

Sirius nodded tensely.

"I have yet to determine the nature of the second potion, but I did not want to take her blood without asking her consent. I will look in on her tonight or tomorrow morning, and I've left the necessary potions on her nightstand."

Hugging his cousin, Sirius could not thank her enough for all she had done. "If it hadn't been for you, I hate to think what would have happened. Remus and Tonks might be a while yet, would you like to Floo home? I don't want to leave Mione alone..."

Andromeda shook her head. "There's no need. _Signore_ Martinelli gave me a one-way portkey to England when he was here. If you don't need me for anything else, I'll be on my way. Don't fret Sirius, she will be will. You'll see."

With that, she clutched an old quill and was gone.

Sighing, Sirius turned and walked to the kitchen. He had not yet eaten lunch and he was ravenous.

To his surprise, three plates of pasta sat on the table, under a warming charm.

_Thanks Dromeda, _he thought. Sitting down, he ate quickly. When he had finished, he cast a cleaning charm on his plate and sent it back to the cupboard.

Just as he was making his way to the living room, he heard a soft whimper. He turned immediately walked into Hermione's room.

Sirius found her awake, and trying to sit up in bed. He saw with relief that Tonks or Andromeda had managed to slip some light blue cotton pyjamas onto her. The last thing she need was him ogling her like a schoolboy.

Smiling, he walked over to her bed and sat on the edge. She looked up at him, then cast her eyes down, as if she were ashamed. She looked exhausted and very pale. Her brown curls were unruly, and he had the sudden urge to run his fingers through them. Blinking, he suppressed the urge. _Where the hell did that come from?_ He wondered.

Slipping a hand under her chin, he gently made her look at him. "Hi love, how are you feeling? Better?"

She looked at the wall behind him, refusing to make eye contact. "Yes, thank you. Sirius, I'm so sorry, you must think-" Her eyes widened as he gently pressed a finger to her soft lips, silencing her.

Taking away his finger, he smiled at her. "Mione love, don't be sorry. You never have to be sorry for needing help from me. Haven't I told you? Anything you ask of me is yours. Anything."

She blushed and looked at the bedclothes. "Sirius, you're very kind..."

He interrupted her again, leaning down to kiss her forehead. "I care about you, love. I will always take care of you. No matter what happens, remember that. You're not alone, Mione."

She shook her head. "I...can't help but worry about what you must think of me now..."

Sirius stood up. Walking around to the other side of the enormous bed, he slipped off his shoes and climbed onto the bed to settle next to her. Carefully taking her in his arms, he propped himself against the headboard.

"Love, if anything, I think even more highly of you now than I did before."

She didn't say anything, causing him to sigh.

"Mione, love, I think we need to have a little talk."


	11. Chapter 11: Explanations

** Disclaimer: JKR's world and characters, my story.**

_A/N: Hello hello! Well, here we have the next chapter- so sorry it took a bit longer, but a family member was in hospital for a while, so that took a fair chunk out of my writing time. I hope you enjoy the next chapter. Thanks for all those who left reviews, it means a great deal to me! Keep reading and reviewing!_

* * *

Hermione shifted slightly and plucked at her blankets. "About what?" She asked quietly. She had a horrible feeling she knew all too well what he was going to say.

Laying his head atop hers for a moment, he gathered his thoughts, trying to find the right words. After a few moments, he lifted his head and turned slightly so that he was looking at her.

Hermione continued to stare at the pale blue cotton blankets, a look of dread on her pale face.

"Love," he began. "I want to be honest with you, and hope you will be with me. I...I hope you'll forgive me if I say something wrong. I'm not very good with words, Mione."

She gave a small nod, still looking at her blankets.

"You…you remember everything that happened last night? _Everything_?"

She nodded again.

"You remember that you gave me permission to…look?"

Hermione closed her eyes in shame. "Yes," she whispered.

"Then you know that I saw. I saw how you see yourself. I saw what happened with that bastard. I saw…everything."

Flinching, she turned her head away, looking instead towards the door to her room, and the corridor outside, her eyes filling with tears of shame.

"Mione?"

"Yes," She whispered again, unable to utter more than that single word. She couldn't bear to look and see the pity that must surely be in his eyes.

_Anything but that_, she thought.

He sighed, wishing she would look at him, but continued nonetheless.

"Love, what happened yesterday was not your fault. That conniving bastard was sent to spy on you and try to trick you so the coward who hired him could gain a place on your team. You did nothing to deserve this- why do you blame yourself for it?"

Blinking furiously, she shook her head- she did not accept what he was saying.

"Mione, you must believe me! It's true! Even _Signore_ Martinelli does not blame you! He was here last night, and again this morning because he is worried about you. The aurors have been trying to locate information on this Emilio Rossi, and all they've been able to find so far is that he's a hired gun, one of the best 'negotiators' in the business. Please, sweetheart, don't blame yourself."

Hermione just shook her head, unspeaking and continued to stare at the doorway. She could hear Sirius shifting beside her.

"Sweetheart, please don't let him make you blame yourself. You did nothing wrong. You met a seemingly nice and handsome man who offered to take you through a gallery and then to coffee and lunch. It's not your fault that he had an ulterior motive, or that he was willing to do anything to achieve it." Sirius stopped for a moment.

"And if nothing else, then at least he didn't take any more advantage of you than he already did. If he had tried to seduce you, I honestly think that I would have killed him." He growled. "

The room was silent for a moment, before Hermione spoke.

"I think that's one of things I'm most ashamed of," she said softly. "Not the fact that he was willing to use sex to get me to trust him, but because I…I think I would have let him, had he tried."

Sirius was stunned. Of all the things he had expected to hear, that was definitely not one of them. Gently, he took her chin in his right hand and turned her head slowly towards him. His chest tightened when he saw the tears filling her soft brown eyes,

"What do you mean, love?" He asked gently.

She closed her eyes. "I mean I would have slept with a complete stranger knowing perfectly well he was just using me for sex if I had been given the chance!" She cried, trying to turn her head back to the wall so she could avoid the disgust she was sure would be in his eyes.

However, Sirius' gentle grip on her chin was too firm- she could not turn her head. She cast her eyes down in desperation, unable to look.

"Sweetheart, I promise you, I am not and will never judge you. I just want to understand, to help you. Please, explain it to me."

She cringed, knowing that what she was about to say would show him how truly pathetic she was. _It's your own fault for letting him see everything in the first place! Didn't you learn from the last time? Letting people in makes them leave! Now you've lost Sirius, he'll never want you now that he knows, _she berated herself bitterly.

Seeing that Sirius was determined, she knew there was nothing to be gained in evading the qustion. _Just tell him and get it over with, _she told herself.

She spoke so softly that he had to lean close to hear her.

"Because I wanted to know what it felt like to….to be wanted by a man. I wanted to know what it felt like to be so close to someone, to be desired, if only for a little while. Had he tried something, I probably would have gone along willingly, knowing that he only wanted to use me for sex, knowing he didn't love me or likely even care about me, b-because I wanted someone to be passionate about me, just once! And…and even he didn't want me! Even he t-told me he didn't bother trying that with me because it wouldn't work! I would have let him because…because I know I probably won't get another chance!"

With that, Hermione buried her face in her hands, overcome by shame and humiliation. She waited for Sirius to drop his arms from around her, to slide across the bed and leave. She waited to hear his horrified gasp, the burning words of censure she knew she deserved. What she didn't expect was for him to draw her more tightly to him, or for him to run his lips over her hair. She certainly didn't expect him to shift her suddenly onto his lap, as he leaned against the headboard, and dislodging the blankets.

She looked up at him in shock, almost afraid at what she would find- and stared. There was no anger or disgust on his handsome, chiselled features, no pity- only kindness, affection…and an emotion she couldn't quite define.

"You're not…going to leave me?" She croaked.

Lifting a hand, he gently stroked her cheek shook his head before whispering in her ear, "Love, I told you last night, I'm not leaving you. I couldn't leave you; how could I live without my Mione?"

She shivered at his closeness, which surprised her slightly, but she had to ask the question that was burning at the forefront of her mind.

"Even th-though I'm cheap? Even though I'm a worthless nobody who couldn't even get a man by flinging herself at him?"

He growled low in his chest, and she jumped in surprise at the sound.

"Never, ever talk about yourself like that Mione! You are not cheap! You are the most dignified, worthwhile woman I have ever met, and anyone who says otherwise will answer to me!"

She looked down at her hands. "I just wanted to know what it felt like…just once."

Sirius rested his head against hers, unable to believe what he was hearing. _Why? Why would she feel like she has no choice but to let herself be used by that bastard? She's worth more than ten of him put together! _Pulling himself out of that line of thought, he focused his attention back on the woman in his arms.

"Why would you think you would have to do that to be wanted, love? Why would you sell yourself short? You deserve so much better than that! You deserve a man who would give you the moon if you asked for it, a man who loves you more than anything!"

_A man like me. _Sirius almost gasped in shock at what he had just thought. _What the bloody hell is wrong with me? She's my friend, I shouldn't be trying to take advantage of her after all she's been through!_

Her soft, bitter laugh shook him out of his reverie. "If I got nowhere when all I was hoping for was sex, then I doubt very much if I would get anywhere wanting romance. Even the mercenary wouldn't touch me!" She scoffed.

"Mione, love, please, trust me when I say that any man would be happy to have you. You're gorgeous, you're intelligent, you're kind and caring….God, I could go on 'til tomorrow! That…that _scum_ didn't try anything because he saw that it wouldn't work with you! He knew that, no matter what he did, you wouldn't be bribed or manipulated into placing some unknown mastermind on your team. He decided to risk being open and direct because he saw he wouldn't be able to manipulate you! If anything, it shows just how strong and honest a person you are!"

Hermione shook her head. "Perhaps he knew it wouldn't change my mind about the placement of this…unknown employer, but he still didn't try to lay so much as a hand on me! What man of his dubious morals wouldn't take advantage of a situation like that? I'll tell you- a man faced with a bucktoothed, bushy haired know-it-all whale!"

Sirius flinched. "Love, why do you say these things? That…that image you have of yourself, it's not real! I know what you look like, and believe me, love, that wasn't you!"

Hermione laughed again, bitterly. The sound was so unlike her, it actually hurt him to hear it.

"Sirius, I appreciate that you are trying to make me feel better about myself. But let's face it- I'm twenty-one years old and have not yet had a single boyfriend. Not one person has ever taken an interest in me that way. The last date I had was when Viktor Krum took me to the Yule Ball in my fourth year! That ended with a kiss on the cheek and a screaming match with…with Ronald Weasley. I won't even call that disaster with McLaggen a date- you saw what happened. I…cared for Ronald for over a year and all he did was fling my feelings back in my face whilst sucking Lavender's face off. He kissed me the night of the Final Battle and then the next day, he went off and got back together with Lavender! And do you know the truly _pathetic_ thing? That was my first and only kiss!"

She took a deep breath as her voice wobbled slightly, and continued. "Here I am, twenty-one and no more popular than I was at five! Even…even after the war, when I was…more well-known….even then, nobody came near me. They were all over Ginny and Luna and the other girls who fought, but they forgot I even existed. "

As she looked into his eyes, he flinched, seeing the tears in her eyes spill over and slowly run down her smooth white cheeks.

"Nobody wanted me then and nobody wants me now. I...I just wanted someone of my own, someone to love and who loves me in return. Remus has Tonks, and you have Lira. I just…I used to want that for myself too, once. Now, well, now I know better."

Sirius sighed. He had been hoping to mention this a little later. "Lira and I broke up, love. We ended it on Sunday."

She blinked, sniffling. "I'm so sorry Sirius, are you alright?"

He nodded impatiently. "Yes, I'm fine actually love. But the point is, I know how you feel. I wanted that too- I still do It's what we all want, isn't it? To love and be loved in return."

Sniffling Hermione turned to look at him. "I'm sure you'll be dating again in no time. Any woman in her right mind would kill to have you."

Sirius grinned crookedly. "Thanks love, are you offering?"

Instead of the blush he had expected, she began to sob.

Cursing himself for his lack of sensitivity, he pulled her to him. "Mione, love, It was just a joke, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you!"

She sobbed all the harder.

"Mione, please, talk to me!"

"P-please don't joke like that Sirius," she sniffled. "I know that nobody will ever ch-choose me. Please don't joke about it. Please."

Sirius flinched as if he'd been struck. _God, Mione, don't, don't say that! Who could help but love you? _He thought.

Knowing his words would be of no comfort, and unable to bear her heart-rending sobs, he held her close and soothed her, running his fingers through her hair, rocking her slowly as he had last night.

Lifting her tear streaked face, he ran his lips over her cheek in comfort, then without thinking, his lips whispered across hers, softly, lightly. He heard her breath catch in surprise, and coming to himself, brought his lips slowly back to her cheek, trying not to act anymore out of the ordinary to as to avoid startling her.

_You utter bastard_, he berated himself. _What the bloody HELL are you doing? Are you __trying__ to hurt her? Hasn't she suffered enough?_

Part of him, however, could not help but notice how soft her lips had been, and was urging him to go back and sample their sweetness.

_Stop that!_ He grated in his mind. _Mione- focus on Mione and leave your bloody hormones outside, you git!_

He shifted his focus to her and noticed that the sobbing seemed to have slowed to soft sniffles. _Well, it seems to have calmed her down, anyway, _he thought wryly. He deliberately ignored the voice in his head urging him to calm her down a little more, and instead smiled gently at her.

She smiled tremulously back at him and roughly wiped the tears from her face. _Thank God, she's not making a big deal out it Perhaps she wants to ignore it. It's probably for the best. _He deliberately quashed the feeling of disappointment in his chest.

"I'm so sorry, Sirius. Two days in a row is a bit much, isn't it? I'm sorry you had to see that."

He gently touched her cheek in comfort. "Love, we all have our bad days. Hell, I blubbered like a baby last night!"

She blinked in surprise. "You…you did?"

He smiled wryly at her. "Did you think I could see that, what had happened to you…what _she_ did to you…and remain unmoved? Mione my love, you are so, so very precious to me, to all of us. To think that someone could do that to you…"

She stared at him in shock. "You mean you cried because of what you saw? I thought…" she trailed off, tearing her gaze from his and looking at the wall behind him.

He gently brought her attention back to him. "What did you think, love?"

"I…I thought that, once you saw…things, you would realise I'm not w-worth it and you wouldn't want me in your life anymore." She said softly.

"You are and will always be worth it. _Always_, Mione."

Hermione merely looked down at her hands, plucking once more at the blanket.

Sirius knew this was a good time to tell her about the potion. She had to know. She would never get better until she knew and accepted in her own mind that her perception of herself was badly flawed.

"Mione," he began cautiously. "I have something to tell you, but it may come as a bit of a shock. " Seeing he had her attention, he ploughed on. "Have you ever heard of the _Humilitas_ potion?"

She stared at him in shock for a moment, before nodding, slightly.

Taking her hand again, he rested his chin on top of her head.

"What do you know about it?"

She frowned for a moment, thinking, causing Sirius to hide a smile. The look was pure Hermione; scrunching her forehead as she searched through the vast tomes of knowledge in her head. _She looks so cute when she does that,_ he smiled to himself, despite the gravity of their conversation.

"Well, not much, really. I vaguely remember that it is a mood modifier, a humility draught, as the name implies, and is most commonly used on particularly pompous individuals, or extremely arrogant teenagers."

He nodded. "Do you know much else about it? Ill-effects, or side-effects, perhaps?"

She frowned again. "Not really, although I suppose too much of it can cause an over-abundance of humility, if there is such a thing?"

"Not exactly, love. It's a little more sinister than that, I'm afraid. Large quantities of the stuff can lead to very low self-esteem, warped perception, and in severe cases, an intense self-hatred. It is usually administered under strict medical supervision, in diluted form and in very small doses for no more than a year."

She nodded slowly. "Yes, I suppose that makes sense….But, Sirius, what has that to do with me?"

He flinched. _Here it comes, _he thought. "It has everything to do with you, love. Dromeda did some scans this morning, you see. And she found large quantities of residue from the _Humilitas_ potion in your system. Dangerously high quantities."

Hermione gasped, her eyes wide. "What? I've never taken that potion in my life! She must be mistaken."

Sirius shook his head regretfully. "She's not love. She repeated the scan three times, each with the same result."

"But…but I've never touched it! I've never even SEEN that potion before, let alone taken it, there's no way it could be in my system!" She stopped suddenly and paled. "Unless…."

He nodded tensely. "Unless you were fed the potion without your knowledge."

Hermione gasped, her face white. "B-but who would do such a thing? And WHY? Was I _that_ insufferable that someone felt there was nothing to be done except dose me with potions without my consent?"

Sirius growled. "No. The _person_ who fed you those potions did it out of their own insecurity and desperation, because they were jealous of you. There is no excuse for what they did."

"You know who it was? Tell me!"

He nodded slowly. "Yes, love, I know who it was. Tonks, Remus and I, confirmed it this morning after we were told the result of the scans. Are you sure you want to know now, though? There's nothing wrong with waiting until you've recovered a bit."

Hermione shook her head impatiently, her face pale and the dark circles under her eyes painfully obvious. "No, Sirius, I'll never be able to rest now until I know who it was. Please, tell me. I-I need to know."

"You aren't going to like it," he said bluntly. "Are you sure?"

She nodded. "Who?"

Exhaling slowly, he looked her in the eye and told her softly, "It was Ginny Weasley."

If possible, Hermione's face grew even paler and her fists clenched on the blanket. Forcing herself to speak, she managed to whisper two words. "How much?"

He didn't pretend to misunderstand. "Four to five drops of undiluted draught per week, for approximately two years."

"W-what?"

Sirius nodded grimly. "An almost unprecedented dose, and the side-effects are beyond severe."

Taking a deep breath Hermione attempted to calm herself. "How was the potion administered?" She asked in a shaky voice.

Sirius scowled at the memory of what Ginny had told him. "Laced sugar quills. The sweetness masked the slightly bitter taste of the potion and did not dilute it, as a drink would have."

Hermione flinched. "She hated me that much?" She asked quietly, her tone full of hurt.

"She was delusional, Mione. She only had one goal, and that was snagging Harry. She saw you as a threat and sought to remove you."

Hermione shook her head. "I….I can't believe it…Ginny…." She began to tremble, unable to believe that this was happening.

Seeing that Hermione was shaking and likely going into shock, Sirius began running his hands up and down her back and arms, whispering soothingly to her, but to his increasing worry, she did not seem to be responding. He had to do something- her body should not be subject to such stresses so soon!

_Kiss her again, _a small voice whispered in his mind. He vehemently pushed the voice aside. _I'm trying to get her out of shock, not put her into it!_ He snarled at himself.

What could he do? What would Dromeda do? _Administer a calming draught_, he thought immediately. _But surely she shouldn't take one so soon after a dreamless sleep potion_, he fretted.

Suddenly, he remembered Lily's favourite muggle remedy for shock. In desperation, he conjured a small tumbler of brandy and carefully guided it to Hermione's lips.

After a few small sips, she began coughing and spluttering. Deciding that she had had enough, Sirius levitated the drink to the nightstand and continued to rub warmth into her. As the coughing subsided, he felt her breathing slowly returning to normal, and the trembling seemed to have stopped.

_Thank you, Lily, _he thought sombrely as he continued to rub Hermione's back. He could almost see Lily's sunny smile and sparkling green eyes as she teased him. "_It's my pleasure, Siri. It's not your fault you're not as clever as I am!"_

He smiled sadly as he thought of the sister he had had for all too short a time- she was so like Hermione it was scary. Both women were frighteningly brilliant, stunningly beautiful and had hearts of gold. He had loved Lily with all his heart, and could not have loved her more if she were of his own blood. The night she and his brother of the heart had died, he felt as if his heart had been killed along with them. But it hadn't been. He had Harry, the boy he loved as his own. Then Hermione had entered the picture. He had his brother, Moony, and his cousin Tonks who was becoming more like a sister every day. Despite being bruised and battered, his heart seemed to be expanding more and more, but this girl, this _woman_, he corrected himself seemed to occupy a large part of it. Her selflessness and beautiful nature had simply refused to allow him to wallow in the horrors he had seen in his lifetime. After his return from the Veil, she had so quickly wormed her way into his heart that, in the end, her presence had been all that was needed to dispel his nightmares. She had simply walked into his heart and never left. He knew he loved her, and had never pretended otherwise, either to himself or others.

He frowned. _But HOW did he love her? She was not a sister, as Lily had been. Nor was she merely a friend- that epithet did not even begin to describe their relationship. What exactly WAS she to him?_

A warm touch on his hand pulled Sirius out of his puzzling thoughts. He looked down and smiled at the pale-faced woman looking tentatively up at him.

"Sirius?"

He couldn't help but smile warmly at her; the very sight of her, tired and strained as she was, gave him more pleasure than any magazine beauty ever could. It wasn't only how she looked, although Merlin knew she was beautiful. It was just- HER- the very essence that was Hermione.

"Sorry, love, I just got lost in thought there. You alright?"

Giving him a tremulous smile, Hermione rested against him. "Yes, thank you. That was very quick thinking on your part, I must say. I'm surprised you thought of brandy, though. Most magical folk have no idea about those old muggle remedies."

He winked. "I'm a veritable fountain of knowledge, love." Seeing her disbelieving look, he relented. "It was something Lily taught us. She always said wizarding folk were too reliant on draughts and potions and spells, and that when we didn't have them, small injuries and ailments became deadly."

Hermione nodded approvingly.

He couldn't help but smile at her. "You're very alike, you know. She and Prongs would have loved you. In fact, I know they _do_ love you, and are probably pulling faces at me as they watch us from the next life for even implying they mightn't."

Blushing, Hermione looked down. "That's very sweet of you to say, Sirius."

Placing a finger under her chin, he tilted her face upwards and looked deep into her eyes.

"And it's true. Every word of it is true, love. If anything, it doesn't do you justice."

She blushed again.

"You are magnificent! I know you didn't believe me before, and I don't care! I'll say it again and again until you believe me, until you know in your very soul that I am telling the truth. You are beautiful, you are brilliant, you are loving and caring and so bloody generous it shames the rest of us. You are a woman without equal, Hermione Granger."

Shaking her head, she tried to object, but he cut her off.

"LISTEN to me! It's the truth, Hermione. You are all of that, and more! I _know_ what you see when you see yourself, but isn't you! It's the result of dangerously high doses of a hazardous potion. The _Humilitas_ potion has warped your mind so much it has caused you to hate yourself! What you see is not real! It's the product of a delusional young woman's obsession with a young man.

You are far more intelligent than I could ever hope to be- you heard what I told you about the side effects and logically, you know what that means about your self-perception. If you don't believe me, I'll have textbooks brought here and you can see for yourself. You MUST see that your self-image is completely flawed."

She said nothing.

Sirius swallowed. "Mione, my love, I'm sorry if I sound harsh, but please, you must listen to me! Do you want me to take an oath that I'm telling the truth?"

Hermione shook her head silently.

"If it will help you to believe me, I'll do it. I don't care what it takes, but I need for you to see that that potion is poisoning your mind! Ginevra Weasley is a sick, spoiled young woman with the compassion of a rock! She did this so that you would not feel confident enough to take Harry from her- her words, not mine. She was so threatened by your close friendship with him that she took criminal measures to try to separate you from him. She set out to make you doubt your very self, to break you enough to prevent you from becoming to the beautiful, vibrant, confident young woman you can be! I beg of you, don't let her succeed!"

He looked intensely at the young woman on his lap, leaning against him with exhaustion, maintaining eye contact nonetheless.

"She…she really said that?" She asked quietly.

He nodded emphatically. "She did, and a lot more besides."

The brown-haired woman looked down, despite his fingers on her chin. "I don't doubt you Sirius. I…I'm sorry if I implied you were being untruthful. It's just…my logic is telling me one thing, but it contradicts the evidence of my own senses. I don't know what to think! I…I want to believe you, I really do. I want to believe that I'm not as hideous and worthless as I think I am, but I just don't know how. I look at myself and all I see is what I showed you. I see a monster. No matter how I try, I seem to gain more and more weight. I don't want to see that, I hate what I see! But I don't know how to see anything else!"

Hermione felt Sirius gently pull her chin up once more. She looked into his eyes and gasped- they were molten steel; hot, burning, intense, _sincere._ Had she really inspired such a reaction in him? She was transfixed.

"Then look through _my _eyes, Mione. Let me show you yourself as you truly are, let me show you the woman we all love. If you could see what I see…" He trailed off, swallowing heavily, seemingly unable to continue.

She stared at him, her soft, hurt brown eyes meeting his heated gaze.

Hermione was torn. Did she truly mean so very much to him? Was she worth that much to him? How could she be? She knew what she was….but if Sirius was to be believed, then her a large part of her self-image was the result of a potion. And if there was one thing Hermione knew, it was that Sirius could _always_ be believed; Sirius Black did not lie. Ever. Could she trust him entirely, make herself vulnerable to him? _Yes,_ she thought. _He hid nothing from me, I saw it all when he returned from the veil. He…he TRUSTED me with his most vulnerable moments, his innermost secrets. Now it's my turn. I trust him more than anyone else._

Gathering all of her strength, she looked pleadingly at him. "Help me," she whispered. "I don't have the strength to do this alone."

A fierce joy and determination lit his gaze. "I'll be here the whole way, Mione. You are not alone, do you hear me? I will be with you every step of the way."

She exhaled nervously. "Thank you, Sirius, you don't know what it means to me."

Sirius gently brushed his lips across her forehead. "You don't need to thank me, love. Anything you need- anytime, anywhere. There's nothing I wouldn't do for you." His gaze grew stern. "And that includes telling you when you are on a dangerous path. Mione, the way you've been eating…it can't go on."

She flinched. "I'm on a diet. It just, well, no matter what I did, it never seemed to work. I still ate enough…"

He shook his head. "Mione, you forget I SAW. I saw how much you've been eating, I saw that you skipped breakfast yesterday, I saw how small your portions have become, and it's got to stop. It's not healthy. Love, you could have killed yourself!"

She looked shocked. "What? No, I was just ill…"

"No, Mione, it was much more serious than that. Your body has had so little nourishment that it was draining your magical core in order to function. Even a week or two longer on that 'diet' of yours could have been fatal- you could have burned out your core and then died from sheer exhaustion. Or, worse still, you could have survived somehow with your magic intact, and slowly wasted away to nothing. You….you know about eating disorders, don't you?"

Hermione shook her head vehemently. "No Sirius, I admit, I took it a bit far, but I don't have anorexia! Honestly, I don't!"

He smiled grimly. "Most people with anorexia say the same thing. Calm down, love, I know you don't have the disease per se yet, but you've already taken the first few faltering steps down that path. You've been shrinking your food portions to an unhealthy size due to a negative body image, with no medical input or advice. Your perception is becoming less and less grounded in reality. No matter how little you eat, you imagine yourself to be getting bigger. I have it on good authority that that is how it starts. Mione, we need to stop it now, before it goes any further. I can't lose you to that, not you."

Hermione was silent for a moment. "Who?" She asked.

He knew what she meant. "A girl I went to school with, a friend. Her name was Audrey King. She was a lovely girl, muggleborn. None of us knew she was doing it, until one day she collapsed in the Great Hall. That was the first time I had seen her without glamours. I…I couldn't believe it. She was so thin, so emaciated… she looked like a skeleton wearing skin. She didn't even look like Audrey anymore. Apparently she had been doing it for a few years, and hiding the damage with glamours, until one day her body couldn't take it anymore. They took her away, and it was the last time I saw her. She died not long after."

"Oh. I'm…I'm sorry." She whispered.

Sirius turned his heated gaze to her once more. "Don't be sorry, love. Just don't go down that same path; there's no coming back from it. Please don't do that to yourself. If you won't do it for your own sake, do it for mine! Please, Hermione, I beg of you, don't do this. I can't lose you. You're…you're everything to me. I don't know how I would be able to go on if you weren't there."

Hermione gave him a tear-filled smile, secretly shocked that she had come to mean so much to him. He meant the world to _her_, of course, but he was, well, _Sirius_. She was just plain old Hermione Granger. _I really mean that much to him?_ Part of her brain immediately shot the idea down in flames. _Of course not, he's just being kind._ Another part of her though, questioned the idea. _This is Sirius, he would never lie to me. Oh I don't know what to think. Why does nothing make sense?_

"I…I want to believe you; truly, I do. I want to believe you and start eating normally again. I'm so _hungry_ and so tired. It's just….every time I look at anything remotely edible, I can't help but feel like I don't deserve to eat it, that fat lumps like me shouldn't be allowed to be seen in public, let alone eat good food. I don't know what to do, I don't know how to make it stop."

Cupping her face gently in his hands, Sirius spoke softly. "Let me help you, love. If it will make you feel better, we can get a Healer to examine you and tell you whether your weight is healthy, and what you need to eat in order to be healthy. It doesn't have to be Dromeda, I'll take you to anyone you like. Let me prove to you that you are not overweight and you need to eat healthily. You've lost a bit of weight the past couple of weeks, sweetheart-I want those luscious Mione curves back in full force!"

She shook her head sadly. "Only you could say that, Sirius."

"No love, I'm not the only one who says that. But even so, does it really matter what everybody else thinks? Just look at yourself through my eyes, and you'll see the truth."

Hermione sighed. "Part of my mind says that a lot of my ideas are because of the potion and I'm not entirely objective about myself right now. But the rest just insists I'm fat and I don't deserve to eat, that I'm worthless, that I'm nothing but an embarrassment."

Sirius dropped his hands from her face and pulled his arms around her. "Love, you are _not_ am embarrassment, you are _not_ fat. Just trust me and I'll help you; we'll get through this together, step by step." He paused. "Do you trust me?"

He felt her tense in his arms and was suddenly afraid of her reply.

"Yes."

That whispered word caused him to sigh in relief.

"Then let me help you. We'll go to another Healer, when you're more fully recovered, and get their opinion on the matter. Perhaps, when you're ready for it, we could visit a mind Healer, to begin to counter the work of that potion. Speaking of which, there's a neutraliser potion for you to take, to get rid of the effects of the _Humilitas._ Dromeda wants to wait until you're a bit stronger before she gives it to you, perhaps tomorrow."

Hermione trembled, then nodded, burying her face in his shoulder.

"Next week, we can think about going to see another Healer. However, this week Dromeda said you're to stay home and rest- and EAT. She's left a meal plan for you."

Hermione gasped and looked up. "I can't stay home, I have work to do, people to answer to! Whatever will Enrico think?"

Sirius soothed her. "Enrico has already asked me to tell you that you have permission to take any time you need in order to recover. In fact, I suspect he'll look in on you this evening. He was here this morning and last night."

Hermione flushed with mortification. "He…he was?"

Laying his head on hers, Sirius told her, "Don't worry, love. He was very worried about you. He was the one who organised Dromeda's papers, you know."

Hermione nodded, still embarrassed. "I can work from home while I'm here, then."

Sirius gently tightened his arms about her. "When you're more recovered, then we'll see. Right now, you are supposed to be resting and allowing your body and your magical core to recharge. Speaking of which, you also need to eat, or you will continue to deteriorate. Will you follow Dromeda's plan until you're well enough to go out and see another Healer?"

Hermione flinched. "Sirius…."

He tightened his arms further. "Please. Just until we can see another Healer. Then I promise you, I will abide by whatever they say, if you'll do the same! Please?"

She could hear the raw emotion in his voice, the worry. He had been worried about her. He had stayed to take care of her, he had brought medical help. No matter how hard this was for her, she owed him that much. _Do it_, she told herself.

"I….alright, Sirius. Until we can see another Healer."

The man in question sighed in relief. "Thank God. Don't worry, I'll be here the whole time, you won't have to face it alone."

A sudden thought struck Hermione. "Sirius? Won't that be rather difficult seeing that you live and work in England?"

He blushed. He really did look endearing with his skin flushed like that. "Er, well, you see Mione, I took the week off, and, er, for the other, I thought perhaps you wouldn't mind if I used one of your spare rooms? I can commute to work easily from here by portkey, after all…."

He trailed off, unsure of her reaction. However, it seemed that he need not have worried, if the way her face lit up was any indication.

"Oh, Sirius, would you? You would do that for me? Oh, thank you! I get so lonely here sometimes, it would be wonderful to have company!"

Sirius beamed. "Mione, I'll stay here as long as you'll let me!"

Hermione smiled, closed her eyes contentedly and snuggled into Sirius, as if the conversation had drained the last of her energy from her.

"You're too good to me, she murmured.

Sirius smiled against her hair. "Mione, if anything, you're too good to me. You've stuck by me through thick and thin. I would do anything for you, I'd die for you if I had to."

"Don't want you to die, want you to live, Siri, " she mumbled. "You're so very precious to me. So happy you came back. Need you."

Her mumbled words caused his heart to surge in his chest. "Did you just call me Siri?"

"Mmmmmmm," she sighed. "Hope you don't mind."

He chuckled, the sound vibrating through his chest under her ear. "You can call me whatever you like, love. I just haven't heard it for a very long time. Lily used to call me that. "

"Lovely Lily," she whispered. "I'm glad she let me have you back. She has James, but I needed you here."

Sirius blinked away the tears that suddenly blurred his vision, holding this precious woman tightly to him. "And you'll always have me love, until the day we go to meet Prongs and Lily together."

"Together," she murmured. Suddenly, she tensed slightly and seemed to focus a little more.

"Siri? You'll tell me how you found out it was Ginny? You'll tell me what happened later?"

He stroked her cheek with one hand, refusing to relinquish his claim on her. "Of course, love. I could never keep anything from you. I'll tell you everything after you get some more rest."

Hermione relaxed in his arms, then shifted slightly, closing her eyes again. "Good. Time to sleep now, Siri."

He began to carefully disentangle himself from her, when she spoke.

"No."

He paused. "You want me to stay?"

Barely coherent, she mumbled. "Yes."

Unable to explain the feeling of elation that coursed through him at this request, he placed his wand on the nightstand and shifted her off his lap, laying her carefully next to him. He then slid down onto the bed and under the covers. Pulling her to him, he snuggled into her, his chest pressing against her back, and pulled the covers more securely over them and closed his eyes, breathing in the scent of her hair.

His lack of sleep the night before and the exhausting morning had caught up with him, and he found himself drifting into sleep.

_Love you my Mione_, he thought tiredly as he drifted off into unconsciousness. _My Mione…._

* * *

_Meanwhile, at Sirius' Flat in London…_

Remus sighed and sat down opposite George.

"What's going on? Far too much to tell you now, George. And there are things I cannot tell you without either Sirius' or Hermione's permission."

George raised an eyebrow.

Remus looked him straight in the eye. "One thing I can tell you which you will no doubt find out soon enough is that Hermione is now under the protection of the House of Black, and that consequently, some of the things that happened here today are now considered to be Black Family business. Sirius even invoked _Familia Seceretum_ over your two youngest siblings, something I never thought I would see him do. "

George gaped. "_Familia secretum_? It was that serious?"

Tonks snorted, muttering, "You could say that".

Remus nodded sternly, his face drawn and tired. "Yes, it was exceedingly serious, but as I say, I have no right to speak of it until Sirius gives permission."

George nodded slowly. "I see. That does restrict things a bit…Tell you what, there's only one thing I really want to know at the moment; Where is Hermione?"

Remus sighed again, and put his head in his hands. His earlier struggle with the wolf, and the confrontation with Harry and the other two had drained almost all of the energy he had, and he was exhausted- and hungry.

Tonks, seeing her husband was teetering on the brink of collapse, summoned a bar of chocolate from the kitchen and handed it to him. With a look of relief, he tore into it, demolishing the sweet in almost no time at all. Hiding a smile, she turned back to George.

"We cannot tell you where she is."

George frowned. "You mean you don't know?"

Tonks shook her head. "No, I mean we can't tell you. Mione forbade us from telling anyone where she is."

The red-headed man sat back in quiet shock. "But why? What did we do to make her cut us off without a word?"

Tonks laughed bitterly. "What didn't you do?"

"No need to be nasty, Tonks," he frowned. "Just tell me what we're supposed to have done."

Tonks glared at him. "Care to remind me of the date of your departure for your little overseas trip?"

George stared at the seemingly odd question. "Er…eighteenth of September."

"That's right. Now, I don't suppose you happen to remember any specific events that usually occur around that time of year?"

George looked down. "Not really…I mean, it was two days after our… my birthday, but you know I don't celebrate that anymore. I was having a bit of trouble so they took me away for a break, you see."

Tonks' expression softened slightly, but she did not relent. "And you don't remember anything else around that time of year, any special occasions?"

George shook his head slowly. "No….not really…."

Tonks sighed. Seeing that she was becoming agitated, Remus interrupted.

"Do you know the date of Hermione's birthday?"

Staring at another seemingly irrelevant question, he frowned for a moment before his eyes grew wide.

"It…it was September the nineteenth, wasn't it? We were supposed to have dinner at the Three Broomsticks. Oh shit, we all missed it and no one even remembered!"

Remus nodded grimly. "I'm afraid so. And it gets worse- it was her twenty-first birthday."

George looked as though he had been hit in the face with a cricket bat. "Oh, shit."

Tonks smirked. "Exactly. Not one of you remembered, and you all took off on a lovely little holiday to the French Riviera without even asking her if she wanted to come along. What was she supposed to think?"

"Bloody hell," he cursed, looking at the floor. "I dunno why no one asked her to come, would've thought Ginny or Harry would have remembered. I was…out of it. Hell, I spent the first week in the Hotel bar pissed off my rocker." He looked up suddenly. "That's a pretty weak reason to pack up and move without telling anyone, though. What aren't you telling me?"

Tonks scowled at him.

"Don't look at me like that, Tonks! Look, I know it was a bloody rotten thing we did, alright? But you know as well I do that people don't just pack up and leave because their friends are idiots, yeah? So what else is going on here?"

Remus interjected. "Yes, there were a number of reasons behind her decision to leave, some of which we can disclose now, others which we can't. The crux of the matter is that she felt she had nothing to stay for, she was offered a job abroad, a very good job I might add, and she decided to take it."

"Nothing to stay for? She had everything to stay for!"

Tonks raised an eyebrow. "Name five reasons she should have stayed."

"What? You've got to be bloody kidding me!"

Tonks levelled a hard stare at him. "Humour me."

Shaking his head in disbelief, the red-head complied. "Alright. Number one, friends and family. Number two, her job. Number three, this is her home. Number four, she owns a flat in London. Number five, she bloody fought to rid this country of prejudice, she gave up a lot for it. She deserves to stay and enjoy the benefits of what she fought for."

Tonks nodded. "Alright, let's go through your list in reverse order. First; the war. Yes, Hermione fought more than most to rid this country of prejudice. She sacrificed most of her childhood and teenage years to make sure that the next generation of muggleborns would be able to attend school and live as magical citizens in peace, to try and obtain equal rights for all magical beings, witches, wizards and creatures alike. And how has this country repaid her? Granted, she can now walk down the street without the majority of the population calling her mudblood. She has the right to live in peace and safety. But what else? Whilst she can work in the Ministry, there is little to no chance of her gaining a place on the Wizenagamot, since the seats are hereditary and she's a muggleborn. There is no chance she will ever be able to run for political office because even now the old pureblood faction is too strong. Hell, we were reminded very clearly this morning that should she or any other muggleborn press charges against a pureblood, the pureblood faction will more than likely sweep it under the rug as a matter of principle. New developments and technology are hidden and banned in Britain because none of them come from British purebloods- they're either made by foreigners or muggleborns. In short, the purebloods, despite the very recent war and all it cost us, are doing their level best to ensure that Britain remains as frozen in time as she ever was. To be honest, they're setting the stage for another Dark lord or lady to try and take over because the old prejudices are still there and still encouraged. After all she went through, despite being the best of the best, she is and will always be treated as a second-class citizen by those in power. Why would she want to stay around for that?"

George looked flabbergasted. "I….didn't think of it like that."

Tonks shook her head wearily. "Of course you wouldn't- you're a pureblood. You've never had to live without that protection."

"True enough, I s'pose," he said slowly.

"Right. Next point: Her apartment. Yes, she owns a flat in London, but her new employer has offered her a luxurious apartment in one of the top suburbs in the country, all expenses paid with the option of purchasing it outright at the end of the lease."

The look of surprise on George's face looked as though it might have taken up permanent residence. At any rate, he did not reply.

"As to this country being her home- what makes it so? Why is it home?"

George thought for a moment. "Well…she was born here, she's lived here her whole life. Her friends and family are here, her work…." He trailed off, a look of comprehension coming into his eyes.

"You're beginning to see, aren't you? As the saying goes, home is where the heart is, and to be honest, Hermione's heart hasn't been here for a very long time. Now that she has a chance for a fresh start in a new place, I think it very likely that that will become her new home. She's been getting job offers for the past year, and each one better than the last. The fact that she accepted this one speaks very loudly about where she considers her home to be.

Reason number two is obviously not an issue- she has a very good job with an extremely reputable employer, and she has excellent prospects."

At this point, Remus seamlessly took over from his wife.

"That leaves us with the most important issue- friends and family. Tell me, George, what friends and family does Hermione have here in London?"

George looked at him as though he had grown two heads. "You having me on, Remus? You know as well as I do."

The tired werewolf looked at him. "Just humour me."

"You two are bloody barmy, you know that?" Shaking his head, George began to recite a list of Hermione's friends and family. "Right, well there's her parents, Harry, Ron and Ginny, me, you Remus, Tonks, Sirius, Teddy of course. Oh, and the rest of the Weasleys. Er, Luna Lovegood, Nev Longbottom, old McGonagall was always find of her too…..that enough to be getting on with, you reckon?"

Remus nodded. "Fine. Now, how often do those people contact or visit Hermione? How many of them make the effort?"

Tousling his red hair, George frowned. "Well, I reckon Harry, Ron and Gin would see her often enough. They've always been the best of friends….although, makes me wonder how they could make such a gaff about her birthday then?" Shaking his head, George gave in. "Look, Remus mate, honestly, I dunno. You know I hardly know what's going on outside WWW these days."

Tonks butted in immediately. "Exactly! You have no bloody clue what's been going on. For your information, Luna and Neville live overseas and the three so-called best friends you mentioned haven't even seen Hermione in the last six months. They barely call her, have had little to no time for her and, putting it bluntly, have phased her out like last year's bloody shoes. After everything she's done for them, for _you, _for every bloody one, she's been tossed aside like so much rubbish. Do yourself a favour and read the newspapers for the past year- you'll notice a certain two redheads and one black haired auror in just about every issue. You might also notice who's missing- coincidentally, it happens to be the same person who was left out of your little holiday!"

George stared at her disbelievingly. "You're bloody crazy! Those three, especially Ron and Harry, have always been close to Mione. There's no way this could have happened without my noticing."

Tonks snorted. "Right. And when exactly were you supposed to notice anything? You only ever spoke to her via Floo, or when she dropped by the shop. You rarely even stop by the Burrow anymore- when were you hoping to see this falling out in action?"

George scowled. "Look, alright, maybe I have been a bit slack in my social duties of late, but I reckon I have a good enough reason, yeah?"

Tonks scowled right back. "It's pretty bloody obvious that you think you do, George, and to hell with everybody else! Apparently that includes the one woman who stood by you and looked after you when your life fell apart!"

"Don't talk about what you don't understand, Tonks! You know what it's like to lose…him? Like I've lost half of myself! I don't want to be here without him, but apparently fate has a sick sense of humour since he's gone and I'm still here! Every day, he fades a little further into the past, every day I live without my best friend by my side, and every day all I can do is remember him! His memory is all I have left, and if that means that I fall behind every now and then, then so be it!"

The room was silent for a moment before Remus spoke.

"That," he said quietly, "is utter bullshit."

George jerked as though he had been slapped, his face pale, and stared at the werewolf.

Remus fixed his blue-eyed gaze on the redhead and George was shocked; the ordinarily mild-mannered man was blazing with fury.

"Do you really think you're the only one who's lost someone? This war almost cost me everything! My parents were killed when I was in my third year of Hogwarts- punishment for their refusal to disown the half-breed and join the Death Eaters.

James and Lily, " here his voice broke, but he pushed on, "my brother and sister in every way that mattered, were betrayed to their deaths by another man I had considered a brother! Do you understand what that meant for me? You know what I am! James, Lily, Sirius and…the rat were the only people to accept me as I was! They loved me in spite of my being a monster! They were my family! Far from rejecting me, they did everything they could to make my transformations easier. I loved them, still love them, and when James and Lily died, part of me died with them! I spent my time drinking and wishing that I had died in their place. I thought Sirius was the traitor and that the rat was dead. I was alone! I had no one to ease my nightmares, no one to take the bottle out of my hand. I had no one to give a damn whether I lived or died. My stupidity cost me the first thirteen years of Harry's life! And it might very well have cost Sirius thirteen years of his! Had I tried to learn _why_, had I even been bloody _sober_, I might even have uncovered the truth! Sirius might at least been given a trial! Instead, I focused so much on the dead it nearly cost me the living! Even…even after I got Sirius back, I lost him again! He died in front of my eyes!

I almost Harry to the veil that night. Harry, all that remained of either of my brothers. I almost lost Hermione that same night- Dolohov almost killed her! That girl…she's something else. She learned what I was long ago and didn't care in the slightest. She has the biggest heart of anyone I've ever known! She was a ray of hope for me to warm my battered heart over, and I almost lost her.

I lost Albus, the only one who was willing to give me a chance! He was the one who allowed me to attend Hogwarts, the only one who saw me as a human, who gave me employment, treated me with dignity and he was GONE, killed by a man we thought was on our side!

I nearly lost Dora during the final battle! Dora…Dora taught me to live again. She taught me to look at what I had, not what I had lost. She looked at me and saw a man to love, not a beast to fear. She is EVERYTHING to me. Can you even possibly begin to understand what it did to me to face losing her? And yet, I didn't have the option of falling apart this time- I had a son, a child who needed, who _deserved_, his father's devotion and love, not a man so preoccupied with the shades of the past that he ignored the future!"

Remus was panting heavily, his face white with weariness and fury, his blue eyes blazing, his eyes full of tears. This was no wolf-induced fit of anger- Remus; shy, reserved Remus was baring his very soul to them. Tonks, seeing her husband's pain and with tears in her own eyes, walked up to him and slipped her arms about his waist. He buried his face in her hair, holding her tightly to him, taking comfort from her soothing presence.

George was utterly speechless. He had never seen Remus speak so vehemently. He had never known what loneliness and pain the man had suffered in his life; how could he be so full of life, so kind and happy after everything that had happened to him?

Having calmed himself slightly, Remus raised his head and looked at George, his face full of sympathy, anger and understanding.

"Believe me when I tell you that I understand entirely, George. I know what it is to lose someone. Yes, I was so blessed as to get Sirius back, but James and Lily…they will not return. They have passed on to the next great adventure, as Albus would say. I miss them still; there are two wounds in my heart that will never fully heal until I see them again.

But I am alive, George, as are you. We both of us have too much to live for. Like James, Fred was full of life and fun, full of excitement and mischief. Do you think he would like what you have become? Do you think he would thank you for being blind to the many blessings in your life, the wonderful family you have, your friends, your business, only dwell on his memory?"

George could not speak, and hung his head, tears running down his face. He knew that Remus was right- if Fred had seen him like this, he would have hexed him, charmed his hair to be twelve different colours, and turned him into a canary. Hell, he probably would have punched him in the face. For the first time since his twin's death, George allowed himself to feel shame. He had been using his grief to drown out the rest of the world for three years; he had been using Fred, and his memories of Fred, as an excuse to stop living. If anything, he had dishonoured the memory of his brother. Pulling himself out of his reverie, he noticed that Remus was speaking again.

"Do _not_," he stated emphatically, "dwell memories of the dead only to forsake the living. You cannot avoid living, George, and it is a lonely road indeed when you have only shadows and thoughts for company."

Burying his head in his hands, George nodded, unable to speak.

Seeing his distress, Tonks released her husband and tentatively approached the distressed young man, touching him on the shoulder. Seeing that he did not flinch from her touch, she sat down next to him and slipped an arm around his shoulder. Surprisingly, didn't push her away.

"I lost my dad during the last year of the war," she told him quietly. "He was on the run with a couple of other muggleborns, and he was captured and killed- hunted and slaughtered as if he were an animal, just because his parents were muggles. I know he would never have gone down without a fight, though. And that's the important thing- at least Fred died fighting. Fred…he died a good death, George. He went in that night knowing he might never come out, he stayed and he fought and died bravely. He died so you and the rest of your family could live a good, peaceful life, and I reckon he would have counted it a fair trade. If it had been you that was killed, would you have thought it a fair exchange for Fred and the rest to be able to live in peace?"

George nodded, his eyes red. 'Without a second thought."

"Then don't begrudge your brother _his_ sacrifice- it was the price we were all willing to pay, George. He paid it and I'd bet good money he's pranking the hell out of everyone up there he meets until you get there to wreak twice as much havoc. Hell, Albus and James have probably joined him by now."

"Reckon they would have, at that, " the young man choked, laughing a little.

Giving Tonks a small smile, he wiped his face. Looking at both her and Remus in turn, he nodded to them.

"Reckon I've been right arse the past few years, and no one's had the heart to say anything about it, everyone's been to worried about upsetting me. Thanks for…..you know, setting me straight. I dunno where I'm gonna go from here, but for the first time in three years, I feel….different. Can't explain it exactly- it still hurts like hell, but I know it's time to _do _something now. I…I can't keep hiding anymore, can I?"

Remus shook his head. "No, you can't, but I think you'll find the rewards of living are far beyond your greatest expectations. Honour his memory and a good life- have something to brag about when you see him, eh?"

George smiled. "Yeah, reckon I should at that. Tosser's already had a head start on the next life, gotta have something to make up for that. Probably already nicked all the good girls, too." His expression sobered, as he remembered the reason for his self-introspection.

"Did Mione…say anything about me? Did she leave because I've been so self-absorbed that I didn't see what was happening to her?"

Tonks sighed. "Not exactly. She said she was willing to hear you out before she made any decisions about your friendship. She knows what you've been suffering, George."

He sighed with relief. "Thank God, although it probably more than I deserve if I've missed as much as you say. Did Harry and the rest forget her that much?"

Snorting, Tonks shook her head. "You have no idea, George. They did more than forget her. The way they treated her, despite everything she did for them. Heck, you probably saw a lot of it in school. Harry always chose Ron over her, despite the fact that your brother deserted him more than once. Ron treated her like bloody rubbish, not to mention your sister. They wore her confidence to the bloody ground- in the end she was a walking homework dispenser to them. To be honest, they all treated her like shit, never mind how many times she saved their arses. Same thing happened during the Horcrux hunt, apparently; your brother took off halfway through and abandoned the two of them out there in the middle of bloody nowhere. They almost died a few times and Hermione got them out of it, of course. She got them through that hunt piece by piece- they never would have found or destroyed a single horcrux if it weren't for her. She…she endured things I can't even think about without wanting to scream. She never speaks about it, you know. She suffered so much and never complained. Even after the war, she was there for the lot of you- you remember how she nursed you through your nightmares? Not to mention coaxing you back into the shop….She was there for every bloody one and they forgot her. Well, after the birthday fiasco, she had had enough and decided that if you lot weren't going to be bothered with her then she wouldn't bother with you! She took the offer and that was that."

George flushed, ashamed of having ignored the very person who had gotten him through the worst period in his life.

"She still keep in contact with you two and Sirius, then?"

Tonks nodded. "She gave us international portkeys, so we can visit her whenever we want. Spent the night there yesterday, actually."

The young man suddenly frowned. "What about her parents though? Don't they mind her living so far away?"

Remus sighed in what sounded like relief as Tonks muttered, "Finally, he asks!" Turning to the red-haired man on the couch who was looking at them with curiosity, she shook her head.

"Her parents are no longer here."

George frowned. "What, you mean they moved too?"

Remus shook his head. "No. Her parents died during the war."

Inhaling sharply, George shook his head in confusion. "No! How could they? She sent them away! How did the Death Eaters find them?"

"They weren't killed by Death Eaters. They died in Australia, in a muggle car accident whilst they were still under the effects of the memory charm."

George sucked in a breath. "But that means…"

Remus nodded sombrely. "Yes, they died not knowing who they were, or that they even had a daughter."

"But why didn't she tell us? That was over three years ago! Why didn't she say anything?" George gasped, shaking his head in disbelief.

Tonks smiled sadly at him. "In the beginning, everyone was preoccupied with keeping you from killing yourself or going mad. She didn't want to burden you when you had just lost your brother. Later, well, she began to feel hurt that it was months after the fact and no one had thought to ask after her parents. You all knew she had sent them away after all- why didn't one of you ever think to ask her if she had found them again?"

Hanging his head in shame, George said nothing. _So bloody preoccupied with my own loss, didn't even see Hermione had suffered her own. Bloody hell, I'm a royal git, _he berated himself.

"We-we really pushed her away, didn't we? We were all so focused on Fred and then ourselves that nobody bothered to notice she'd lost her parents. Did….did you know?"

Remus nodded. "We found her looking over some old photographs one day and asked her what had happened. Eventually she told us, but she made us promise that we wouldn't tell anyone else about it unless they asked first. Hermione was determined that if you didn't care enough to ask, you didn't deserve to know."

"Much as I hate it, s'pose I can't fault that, can I?" George sighed, rubbing his face wearily. Looking up, he turned his hopeful blue eyes to Tonks and Remus. "You said she'd be willing to hear me out; do you think she'd see me today? I…I really want to talk to her, apologise….She's a one in a million, I don't want her thinking she means nothing to me. Please? Will you take me?"

The Lupins glanced at one another for a moment, and seemed to communicate silently before turning back to the anxious young man before them.

"We can't take you right now," Tonks said finally.

George's face fell.

"She's not feeling well today, you see. We can ask her this afternoon, and she can decide when to see you."

He nodded resignedly. "Fair enough." Suddenly, his eyes sharpened. "What do you mean she's not feeling well? Does this have something to do with what you can't talk about?"

Remus nodded. "Yes, it does. I'm afraid you'll have to wait until Hermione decides to tell you what has been happening before you can learn the full story."

"Right, family secrets and all…..God this is surreal, doing my bloody head in. Just tell me, is she OK? Is she in any danger?"

Tonks shook her head. "She's alright. She's safe and someone's with her until she recovers. They reckon she'll be alright in a week or two."

George sighed. "Glad to hear it. After everything you've told me today….well, I'm just glad she's OK."

Standing up, he thought for a moment, then turned to the two of them. "Given me a lot to think about today, you two. I'll wait for word from the two of you on seeing Mione, yeah? Meantime… I reckon I have a bit more thinking to do and family to see. Thanks….thanks for the kick up the arse. Bloody hurt, but reckon I needed a wakeup call."

He turned and walked back to the Floo, taking a handful of the green powder and was about to toss it into the fireplace when he stopped and looked back at Remus. "Oh, and Moony, mate," he said quietly. "Thanks for telling me about…everything, reckon it can't have been easy to talk about. Means a lot to me."

Remus smiled tiredly at him. "If it got you to wake up, then it was worth it. Go and live, George. We'll contact you via Floo later about meeting Mione."

Nodding at the two of them, he took a deep breath, tossed the powder into the fire and called "The Burrow!" With a swirl of green flames, he was gone.

The two Lupins stood staring at the fireplace for a few moments, deep in thought, until Tonks decided enough was enough.

"Right! We've had a bloody long morning and I'm bloody tired and what's worse, I'm _hungry! _We're going back to Mione's and Sirius had bloody well better have made us some lunch!"

Smiling, Remus pulled his wife close for a moment, then leaned down and kissed her.

Pulling the portkey from her pocket, Tonks offered it to Remus before winking at him and activating it. Without a sound, they had gone.

* * *

_Hermione's Flat, Roma: 3: 45pm, Local Time_

As soon as they had arrived in the Atrium, Tonks and Remus had gone straight to Hermione's room, expecting that Sirius would be in there also. However, they could not believe the sight that greeted them as they peaked into the room from the Hallway.

Hermione was fast asleep, her face more relaxed than it had been for the past two weeks. Sirius was curled into her back, one arm holding her firmly to him, his face partially buried in her hair. However, this did not prevent them from seeing the peaceful smile on his face.

After staring for what seemed like forever, Tonks silently motioned Remus to follow her. Turning, she walked quietly to the kitchen, where she mercifully saw two plates of pasta under a warming charm.

Turning to her husband, she giggled. "I think that was just about the sweetest thing I've ever seen!"

Remus smirked. "Padfoot's got it bad."

Tonks cocked her head. "Think he's told her how he feels?"

"Merlin no, " the sandy-haired man laughed. "If I know Padfoot, he's probably only starting to admit to himself how he feels, and fighting it every step of the way!"

Tonks smirked evilly. "I can't wait until he wakes up- this is going to be fun!"


	12. Chapter 12: All You Need Is Love

**Disclaimer:Only the plot is mine. The rest belongs to JKR.**

_A/N:_ _Hello hello, lovely readers! My apologies for the extended delay in posting, but as I mentioned in the previous chapter, I have had a relative in hospital, and said relative has now come home. Between work and caring for them (they are still severly incapacitated) I am afraid it really ate into my writing time. However, things are improving and I think the next chapter should be reasonably on time. Thanks for your patience, and all the lovely reviews- they mean a great deal! Keep reading and reviewing!_

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Sirius began to stir, shifting slowly back into consciousness as his sensitive ears detected softly speaking voices close by. He tried to fight wakefulness for a little longer, burying his nose in the sweet-smelling hair of the deliciously soft woman pressed against him, all the while cursing his enhanced animagus senses. However, he could not drown out the two voices, whom he was now able to identify as Tonks and Moony, and gave up, opening his eyes with a sigh.

Yawning as the room came into focus, he glanced at the clock on the nightstand and blinked in surprise- it was already four-thirty in the afternoon. Although, considering the morning he had had and the exhausting night before, he supposed he ought not to be surprised that he had managed to sleep for so long. He certainly felt more refreshed and relaxed than he had at any time during the past few days, and only hoped that Hermione felt the same.

He froze as a sudden thought struck him- had Moony and Tonks seen him in bed with Hermione? _ It doesn't matter if they did_, he calmed himself. _Moony knows it's all perfectly innocent._

Looking at the woman he held in his arms, he thought of the conversation they had earlier, and smiled. She was still fast asleep; he could feel her breathing, deep and even, as she lay against him. _Thank goodness she's sleeping naturally, without any potions,_ he thought._ God knows she needs some real rest_.

Soon, she would awaken and he would help her to prepare a proper meal. _I'll bloody well make sure she eats every bit of it, too_, he vowed to himself. She had asked him to help her, and that was exactly what he was going to do.

He felt the same joyous surge in his chest as he remembered her words before falling asleep. She had asked for _him_ to help her. She…she had thanked Lily for sending him back to her. She had called him Siri. She asked him to stay with her. The feeling in his chest intensified and his arms involuntarily tightened about her waist, trying to draw her closer to him. This woman…she was everything. She was joy and she was light, she was love…she was his love.

Sirius froze. His love? _Of course not, _he thought frantically, _it's too soon after Lira!_. _I love Hermione, how could I not? But it doesn't mean I'm __**in**__ love with her. I love her as a….a…._he trailed off, unable to complete that thought. He found himself in the same quandary he had been in a few hours before; he was entirely uncertain exactly what she was to him. _Still doesn't mean I'm in love with her, _he comforted himself. _Alright, she's not a sister to me, and she's definitely more than a friend, so much more than a friend…. it's just a special kind of relationship- it doesn't mean I'm in love with her! I just love her heart and her kindness, the way in which she can be so gentle and sweet one minute and so fierce and passionate the next. I love her intellect and her brilliance. And I love her face- I could stare into those chocolate eyes forever…._He shook himself. All of that did not necessarily equate to his being in love with her- it simply meant that he…appreciated her. Yes, that was it.

_Then why did you kiss her?_ His mind whispered. Sirius cringed, not having forgiven himself for taking advantage of her when she was vulnerable.

Forcing himself to leave that dangerous line of thought, he reluctantly and carefully extricated his arms from about her waist and shifted carefully across the bed, slipped off the edge and stood, stretching. Grabbing his wand from the nightstand, he ran a hand quickly through his hair and walked around to Hermione's side of the bed, adjusting the covers carefully over her and bending low, brushed his lips over her forehead. He deliberately ignored the voice that urged him to kiss her lips instead, and, with a final look at her peacefully sleeping form, strolled out towards the murmuring voices.

Remus paused in mid-sentence when he saw Sirius enter the room, and smirked. Tonks, turning to see the reason for the interruption, also smirked when she saw her cousin enter the room.

Walking to a comfortable armchair, he plonked himself down and raised an eyebrow. "What are you two so looking smug about?" He asked, casting a quick _mufflatio_ spell to avoid waking Hermione.

"Oh nothing at all, my dear Padfoot," Remus grinned. "We were just wondering if you slept well. You certainly looked as though you were_ extremely _comfortable."

Sirius scowled- evidently, they _had_ seen him in Hermione's bed.

"You know perfectly well nothing went on. Mione was just distressed after we finished talking and she asked me to stay; what else was I supposed to do?"

Tonks smiled innocently at the irate man. "Oh, of course Sirius, I understand. It was all completely innocent, I don't doubt it," she simpered sweetly.

Growling, Sirius shook his finger at his cousin. "I provided her with the comfort she needed, nothing else!"

_But you know that's not entirely true, don't you_? A small voice whispered in his mind. _You kissed her, I wonder what they'd say if they knew __**that**__, if they knew how much you still want to kiss her, again and again….Stop it!_ He snapped to himself.

Sirius shook his head, trying to clear his mind, so focused on dealing with his conflicting thoughts and nagging conscience that he did not notice to look that passed between the other two. It was clear to them that he was fighting a battle in his own mind, and they were fairly certain that knew what it was about.

"Padfoot? Are you alright?"

Sirius jumped at the sudden interruption to his thoughts and looked at Remus in surprise.

"What's that? Yes, of course. Why wouldn't I be?"

Remus tilted his head consideringly. "You appear to be somewhat distracted. Did anything happen while we were in London?"

Sirius gulped. "Happen?"

Remus nodded. "Yes, how did Hermione take the news? I imagine she was terribly hurt when she found out about the potion."

Sirius sighed, partly in relief. "She went into shock. Thank God for Lily's muggle remedies."

Remus raised an eyebrow. "You gave her brandy?"

"Just a few small sips. It worked like a charm - it calmed her down and helped her fall asleep without potions."

The sandy-haired man nodded approvingly. "Good. I'm sure the rest would have done her good." His expression grew unhappy. "Did you tell her everything that happened this morning?"

Sirius shook his head. "No, not yet. She was so exhausted and miserable; I couldn't bring myself to do it. We had a long talk, though." He was not about to reveal the more personal details of what Hermione had told him - that was private and he would never betray her trust like that.

"I did tell her about the potion, and she insisted on knowing who had been dosing her. She-she was horrified to learn it was Ginny. That led us straight into the eating disorder problem. It took a while, but she finally agreed to follow 'Dromeda's meal plan until she's back at full strength, then we're going to see a Healer."

Tonks sighed with relief even as Remus exhaled loudly. "Thank God. So she admits that her perception is, er, somewhat skewed?"

Frowning, Sirius elaborated. "Yes and no. I suppose she knows logically that what she sees isn't real. But from what I saw and what she told me, her self-esteem was already dangerously low even before the potion. We have a lot of work to do before she can begin to look at herself objectively." A look of satisfaction came into his eyes. "And she wants me to help her."

Seeing the somewhat sappy look on his face, Tonks grinned. "I see. Glad to hear that, then. I assume you'll be staying here with her? You know, to _keep her_ _company_?"

Sirius sighed in irritation. "Bloody hell Tonks, let it go! She needed comfort so I held her. Did you expect me to deny her?"

Tonks smiled even more broadly. "Nope, 'course not Sirius. It's very clear that you er, hold her in the highest esteem and affection."

"Look, will you cut it out? I'm not trying to make a move on Hermione! Yes, I love her, yes, I respect her and yes, I think very highly of her, but it doesn't mean I'm after her, alright?"

Remus put in his two bob's worth. "Of course not, Pads. Dora is only teasing." He threw a quick wink at his wife, unnoticed by the agitated animagus in front of them. "We both know you don't feel that way about Hermione."

Sirius exhaled in relief.

"And we both know you would be only too happy to see her in a relationship with a nice young man who'll treat her well."

Suddenly feeling as though he had lead in his stomach, Sirius tried to smile. "Of course I would."

Seeing that his words were having the desired effect, Remus decided to step it up a notch. "In fact, when she starts to improve, I might just ask _Signore_ Martinelli if he knows anyone- perhaps he has a nice grandson or great-nephew. I think a good relationship will go a long way toward helping Hermione recover and it will stop the wrong sort of man from pursuing her, don't you agree?"

Sirius nodded numbly. "Right," he mumbled in what he hoped was a polite manner.

Inside, however, he was seething. _What's wrong with me?_ He growled to himself. _Why do I feel like this_? _I want Mione to be happy, don't I_? _She deserves someone who'll love and cherish her the way she deserves. _

His heart, however, seemed to ache at the idea of another man with Hermione, loving her, holding her. _Kissing her, touching her_, the despised small voice whispered.

He growled aloud at the idea of another man putting his hands on her.

_No! No one can touch her like that! She's my Mione! Mine! _

He reeled at the image that suddenly filled his mind, of him kissing Hermione, slowly running his hands over her soft, curvy form, of waking up to her each and every morning. Even that image, however, did not shock him as much as the feeling of rightness which accompanied it.

_Stop it_! He grated in his mind. _You're just confusing love and attraction for-for love. _

He blinked. Even to him, that sounded utterly ridiculous._ Love and attraction. _He loved her and he was attracted to her. She was no sister and more than a friend. Sirius cringed. _But that means…. Oh. Oh no, no! It can't be._ _I'm….I'm falling for Mione? It's not possible!_ But deep in his heart, he knew that was exactly what had happened.

Groaning, Sirius buried his head in his hands. _Oh God, if she finds out she'll hate me! She'll never want to see me again! I should be shot for even feeling this way! I'm a dirty old man. _

Then, moving so suddenly that he startled Moony and Tonks, he stood and marched over to Remus. Pulling the surprised werewolf up from his perch on the sofa, he drew a deep breath.

"Hit me."

Remus stared at him. "What?"

Sirius sighed impatiently. "Hit me."

"But why? What possible reason could I have for hitting you?"

Sirius visibly steeled himself. "Because I…I think I've fallen in love with Mione."

Remus' face grew blank. "I see."

Sirius nodded unflinchingly. "I've fallen in love with her and I know it's wrong and I'm too old for her. I…I kissed her! Sort of."

"How do you 'sort of' kiss someone?" Tonks asked, hiding a smile.

Flushing with shame, Sirius hung his head. "She was crying and I kissed her on the cheek and then I...I brushed my lips over hers. I didn't mean to, I swear it- it just….happened. I stopped as soon as I realised what I was doing. But that's no excuse for what I did. So I want you to hit me-I know I deserve it."

Remus said nothing. Sirius growled in frustration.

"Look, I know I'm a lecherous old wanker for even thinking about it! She's too good for me; far, far too good for me. She's too young, too unspoiled, too perfect. I took advantage of her and if it were anyone else I would have beaten the stuffing out of them. So please, Moony- hit me. I deserve it."

In a quiet voice, Remus asked . "You really feel that way about her?"

Sirius nodded, seemingly bracing himself.

Unable to maintain his serious demeanour, Remus broke into a wide grin. "It's about bloody time you admitted it!"

Sirius, however, did not seem to hear him immediately. "Don't go easy on me, Moony, make sure you-WHAT?" He stopped dead and stared at his oldest friend.

If possible, Remus grinned even more widely. "I was wondering how long it would take you to admit it to yourself, Padfoot."

"Wh-what are you….I mean….why aren't you…" Sirius stuttered, unable to formulate a coherent sentence.

Tonks snorted. "Oh, really, cousin, did you really think we wouldn't notice? We've known since she left for Rome how you felt about her!"

"You-you did?" But how? He had just realised it himself only minutes before...

Rolling her eyes. Tonks nodded.

"So you-you're not going to hit me?" Sirius croaked. He wasn't entirely sure what was happening here- he felt as though he were in some bizarre parallel universe.

Remus laughed merrily. "Of course not, you silly mutt." His expression suddenly grew serious. "Unless you hurt her, of course. If you hurt her, I'll kick your arse to Venice and back, Padfoot." Then he smiled. "Other than that, I'm no more inclined to hit you than I usually am."

Sirius stared at him. "I…I don't understand. Why aren't you angry with me?"

Remus chuckled. "Pads, _why_ do you think it's wrong for you to feel this way? Is there something wrong with her?"

"No, of course not! How could you even suggest such a thing?"

Hiding a smile at the vehemence with which Sirius responded to a perceived slight on Hermione, Remus cleared his throat. "Exactly, there is nothing whatsoever to prevent you from loving her. In fact, she is _very_ loveable. So I ask you again, why do you think it's wrong for you to feel this way?"

"Wha…I mean….are you serious, Moony? This is Mione we're talking about!"

Remus quirked an eyebrow. "So?"

"So?" Sirius repeated incredulously. "So she's twenty-one years old! So I'm far too old for her! So she's a war heroine, a brilliant witch and the kindest most loving heart there ever was! I'm…I'm too tainted, too bitter for her." He laughed bitterly. "Can't you see it now? The beautiful young war heroine and the bitter old ex-convict; I'm sure the newspapers will love that. She's too good for me Moony- I don't deserve her, I could never deserve her. She…she's everything to me and I don't want to burden her with my baggage. I'm truly blessed to have her friendship and her love. Besides, if she were to find out how I feel about her, she'd leave me and I couldn't bear that, Moony- I just can't lose her. I'd rather have just her friendship than risk losing everything."

Having verbalised the doubts swirling through his mind, Sirius slumped onto the couch and stared blindly ahead, unseeing.

He was so preoccupied with his own thoughts that he did not notice the pink-haired witch standing across the room narrow her eyes and remove her wand from her back pocket, nor did he notice her point it at him. He did, however, notice when a stinging hex collided with his left arm.

"Ouch! Bloody hell Tonks!"

She smirked. "You deserved that."

Sirius sighed, rubbing his arm. "I know I did, I don't deny that but please, next time you want to attack me for being a lecherous old wanker, can you just hit me instead of firing stinging hexes at- OW!"

Tonks glared at him. "You deserved that too!"

Sirius rolled his eyes. "I know I did, all I'm saying is-"

The pink-haired auror cut him off. "No! You didn't deserve it for finally getting your arse in gear and admitting you're in love with our Mione- you deserved it and more for being a mopey, presumptuous , self-hating git!"

Remus coughed, trying to hide a smile, as he added, "I think she's got a point there, Padfoot."

"What?" Sirius was thoroughly baffled now. _Have I stepped through the looking glass?_

Tonks narrowed her eyes and advanced on her cousin. Despite his considerably larger size, Sirius shrank back on the sofa; any sane man knew that when a woman got that look in her eye, it was time to run. Standing in front of him, hands on her hips, she jabbed him hard in the chest.

"Who gave you the right to decide, without even _asking_ Mione, that she could never love you and that you're no good for her? Who gave you the right to sit there moaning about how unworthy you are and use that as an excuse to keep her from something that could make all the difference in the world to how she sees herself? And just WHO gave you the bloody right to deny yourself a chance at happiness?"

Sirius turned his wide-eyed gaze to Moony. "Er, Moony, I…er….tell her….you understand, don't you?"

Remus smiled gently at his old friend but shook his head nonetheless. "Padfoot, Dora is right, and who should know that better than I? You weren't here when I first…noticed…. Dora, but I said almost exactly the same things you are saying now. I was too old, too poor, a werewolf, she didn't need my baggage... I took it upon myself to decide what she needed with absolutely no consideration for her own happiness- as she quite forcefully pointed out to me," he remembered with a fond smile at his wife.

Returning his smile, Tonks turned her hard gaze back to her cousin. "Why shouldn't she love you? More to the point, how do you know she doesn't love you already?"

Sirius swallowed painfully, his eyes bitter. "How could she? She's…she's wonderful. I could never hope to be good enough for her."

Rolling her eyes, Tonks flopped onto the couch beside her cousin. "So, what? You're just going to give up without even trying? 'Cos I'll be honest with you Sirius, that's bloody stupid, even for you!"

"It's not just that Dora, my age is…I'm far too old for her-"

Tonks snorted. "Fourteen years, Sirius! That's not exactly unheard of, is it? In fact, I know of another couple with a fourteen-year age gap and I'm almost certain that you know them too!"

Sirius looked sheepish. "I forgot that you and Moony have such a large gap in your ages- you could never tell by watching you two interact."

Remus spoke up. "That's because we compliment each other, Padfoot. In our hearts and minds, where it really matters, age just doesn't enter into it. Besides, you know as well as I do that we're all likely to live very long lives; witches and wizards don't really have to deal with the same age constraints as muggles. So in ten or twenty years time, your age difference won't mean very much at all. Merlin, there was a twenty year difference between Andromeda and Ted!"

Sirius nodded slowly. "There was, wasn't there….."

Tonks nodded. "And mum and dad fit perfectly together. I had a wonderful childhood with two loving parents who were deeply in love. No child could ask for more than that, and I hope that's what we are giving Teddy." She blinked rapidly to dispel the tears that had gathered at the mention of her deceased father.

Squeezing next to his wife, Remus slipped an arm about her shoulders as he turned to Sirius. "She's twenty-one years old, Sirius, and a much older twenty-one than most. I'm sure you'd agree that she's seen more than most people twice her age and is extremely mature."

Sirius nodded with a ghost of a smile. "I think it's safe to say that she's far more mature than I could ever hope to be."

Remus chuckled. "I should say so. And as for the other matter- let me ask you this. You've seen inside her mind, you know than better than either of us just what she's been through. She's seen darkness and death and despair, over and over again. Would you say she is tainted because of it?"

Seeing Sirius shake his head in negation, Remus continued making his point.

"She's lying in a bed right now, suffering from distorted self-perceptions and self-hatred, and teetering on the edge of anorexia; she has an extra-ordinary amount of baggage of her own. Would you say then that she doesn't deserve a good, decent man because of that baggage?

"Of course not, Moony! She deserves the best."

"So if Hermione deserves someone who is good and decent, why not you? Why are you tainted by your experiences when she is not?"

Sirius was silent.

Remus paused, looking hard at his friend. "Ah, so that is what's really bothering you- you're afraid to act because you think you're not good enough for her?"

Sirius flushed, and then nodded, hanging his head.

"Well, you're right, you don't deserve her, and you never will."

Sirius flinched at this assessment, but did not look up as Remus continued.

"But then, I don't deserve Dora- never have, never will. I don't think it's actually _possible_ to deserve the love of a good woman, but that makes it all the more precious when it is given. But there is more to it than that. Let me ask you this: if you were to love Hermione and she you, do you think that would leave you unchanged?"

Sirius shook his head slowly, deep in thought. "No, I don't see how it could. I…I want to be a better man for her, the man she deserves. If she let me love her, I don't think I could help but try to become better and better for her."

Remus nodded sharply. "Exactly! For the love of her, you will strive each day to become more worthy of her love- her love will transform you and better you, if only you will let it. How can you deny yourself the chance to experience that love?"

Seeing that Sirius remained downcast, Tonks jabbed her elbow into his ribs.

"OW! Bloody hell, Tonks, I'm beginning to doubt that I'll survive this day unscathed. Now what?" He growled, scowling at the smirking woman next to him.

"Just a little something for you to think about before you drown yourself in your misplaced nobility; did you ever stop and think about the fact that you deserve to be happy?"

Sirius stared at her.

Tonks rolled her eyes. "You didn't even consider that in your _Master Plan_, did you? You tried to fight your feelings, tried to deny them, and when you finally admitted it to yourself, you came up with '_Sirius' one hundred and one reasons to nip this in the bud'_. You didn't stop for one minute to think that maybe Hermione could love you back and MAYBE, just maybe you deserve to be happy too? You didn't think that you've suffered too bloody much in your life and that you deserve someone who'll stand by you, for better or for worse?"

Sirius shook his head dazedly. "You…you really mean, that, don't you," he whispered unevenly.

Remus sighed. "Of course we do, Pads. You deserve happiness and love, you deserve a chance at what Dora and I have, what James and Lily had. Could you ever see yourself having that with anyone other than Hermione?"

"No." The word was spoken very low, as if the speaker was afraid of what it could mean. Sirius looked up. "But how could you trust me with Mione?"

Remus looked him the eye. "I could not think of a single person I would trust more with Hermione than you, Sirius. Despite what you think of yourself, you are a very good man, a decent man and Hermione would be the first to hex you for daring to question that."

Sirius chuckled weakly. "She would, too." Then he frowned. "Look, this is all well and good, Moony, but what if she doesn't feel the same way? What makes you think she has those kind of feelings for me? Hell, she'd probably run screaming in the other direction if I said anything!"

Tonks shook her head, muttering about men who needed 'the bleeding obvious' shoved under their noses before they could see it.

Grinning at his wife's tirade, Remus answered his friend. "Padfoot, she loves you more than _anyone_ else in her life. She comes to you for anything and everything, she trusts you. I would also be willing to bet good money on the fact that she is attracted to you. She loves you, and I have no doubt that very soon, that love will take a slightly different direction. What else do you need? Many successful relationships have been built on far less."

"But she has so much to worry about at the moment- I cannot and will not add to her burden by dumping my almost certainly unwanted feelings on her."

Rolling his eyes, Remus pointed out the obvious. "Padfoot, no one's asking you to buy a ring and marry her tomorrow. All I'm suggesting is that you let things take their natural course. Do what you were going to do in the first place- help her, support her, be there for her during this difficult period. You will know when it is time to take the next step because it will feel perfectly natural. When the moment arrives, just let it happen- do not fight it, or convince yourself that it is wrong. Let it happen and let Hermione choose for herself what she wants. Whatever happens, she loves you dearly and you will not lose her. Don't be afraid, Sirius; love her and let time and affection do the rest."

Sirius slumped, exhaling loudly. "I suppose you are right, there's not much else I can do, really... I...I thought about withdrawing from her a bit, but I can't, can I?"He agonised, looking hopefully at Remus.

Remus looked sharply at him and shook his head. "Not unless you want to hurt her and take away what could be the last motivation she has to get better. She's in a desperate situation Padfoot- I think one more loss could push her over the edge."

Sirius bowed his head. "I can't do that to her. She'd think I was abandoning her because she didn't deserve my friendship, and that'd destroy any chance we had of helping her. Besides, I couldn't hurt her like that...maybe it means I am a weak excuse for a man, but I can't do it. I just can't stand to see her hurt.

I suppose there is nothing else to do but wait and let things take their course. There's nothing else I _can_ do, and I won't rush her. Besides, I want to get the Lira situation resolved before I even think about anything else- I wont' feel comfortable until I know that-that _creature_ and her associates are behind bars." He shuddered. "I can't tell you how glad I was that Hermione doesn't live in London anymore when I heard those animals talking. To think that could easily have been her! If Hermione had broken down in London, she could easily have been taken to St Mungo's…."

Remus nodded grimly. They both knew exactly what could have happened to her. However, at the moment, a soft voice interrupted their conversation.

"Siri? Are you still here?" Hermione sounded sleepy and a little worried, as if she thought that Sirius might have left her despite his promise.

A soft smile spread across Sirius' strained face at the sound of her voice. Quickly dispelling the privacy wards, he stood quickly.

"I'm here love!" With that, the raven-haired man walked quickly out of the room, so intent on reaching Hermione as quickly as possible that he failed to notice the stunned expression on Remus' face.

Tonks raised an eyebrow and turned to her husband. "Siri?" Seeing the shock on his face, she touched his cheek questioningly.

He smiled softly, and to her surprise, she saw that his eyes were full of tears.

"I haven't heard that name for a very long time."

She shook her head in confusion. "I don't understand, love. Hasn't anyone ever called him Siri before?"

Remus wiped his eyes unashamedly. "Only person was ever allowed to call him that, because Sirius didn't have the heart to deny her."

"Who was it?"

Remus smiled softly. "Lily."

"Lily Potter?"

Nodding, Remus explained. "He loved Lily like a sister, the sister he never had. I think in many ways, she was closer to Sirius than the rest of us. The point is, he could never refuse her anything. She was the only one who could get away with calling him Siri. Since her death…..well, this is the first time I've heard that name since Lily died. To see him smile like that…. suffice it to say it makes me very happy. I think at last, Sirius is beginning to heal. He's trusting Hermione with his whole heart- he hasn't let anyone close enough to do that for a very long time."

Tonks smiled. She could not begin to understand the horrors her cousin had endured in his lifetime, compounded by falling into the veil and dying for five years, and then somehow mysteriously returning. She knew he still bore many scars in his mind and soul from all he had suffered, but now it looked as though he were finally starting to heal. She knew Hermione had wormed her way into his heart long before Sirius knew it was happening; if anyone could heal his injured heart, it would be the woman laying in bed down the corridor.

Standing, she looked at her husband mischievously. "Come on love, I want to see."

He smiled. "I must admit to being rather curious myself." With that, he stood, pecked his wife on the lips and the two tiptoed quietly out of the room down the hallway towards the door of Hermione's bedroom.

Peeking inside, Tonks smiled at the sight before them. Sirius was sitting on the side of the bed, smoothing Hermione's hair from her face and smiling softly at the woman he loved. She, in turn, was smiling tremulously up at him.

"I…I was afraid that maybe you had left, that you didn't want to help me after all."

Sirius leaned down and brushed his lips to her cheek. "Never, love. I told you- you couldn't get rid of me if you tried."

Hermione seemed to relax. "Thank you Siri. Will you…help me? I'm afraid. I…I know I told you I would eat what Andromeda had left, but…"

"But you're afraid because you still think you need to lose weight," Sirius finished.

Hermione nodded, dropping her eyes in shame at her own cowardice.

Sirius gently slipped his hand under her chin, making her look up at him. Tonks smiled smugly to herself. The look in Hermione's soft brown eyes as she gazed up at Sirius confirmed her suspicions; Sirius had nothing to worry about.

Hermione loved him.

The auror felt a lump in her throat as she watched the two together; she hoped their path towards finding one another would not be too difficult- they had both suffered enough loss and heartache in their lives. Whilst she did not know Hermione as well as Remus or Sirius did, she had grown close to this wonderful young woman since meeting her in her fifth year. She was very fond of Hermione and was pained to see how little recognition and affection she was given in her home country and amongst her friends.

However, Tonks was almost certain that a new chapter had begun in the brilliant young woman's life. She had moved to a country which more than appreciated her talents, if reports from Sirius and Remus were anything to go by, a place in which her inherent worth would be recognised. She would no longer be ostracised and ignored due to her parentage. She had removed two damaging and dangerous personalities from her life and had grown closer to a man who obviously loved and cherished her, a good man who had suffered much himself and yet was still willing and determined to put her happiness above his own.

Despite the opinion of Molly Weasley and a few others, Sirius was not a serial womaniser. Of course, he had had dated a few girls during his school years, like any other teenage boy, but surely he was entitled to grow up before he was subject to labels such as 'womaniser' and 'cad'? He had had only a few years in which to begin a relationship as a young adult, and they had been in the midst of a war. After that, his best friends, or rather, his brother and sister, had been killed, betrayed by another of his brothers, and he had been unjustly imprisoned for their deaths for twelve years. After his escape, his sole concerns were remaining in hiding and helping Harry through the perils that seemed to crop up year after year. They had had only two years together after which Sirius had been killed, falling into the veil before their very eyes.

Tonks shuddered- it had been a sight she would never forget, seeing the cousin she had only just regained hit by the jet of green light and fall slowly, inexorably into the veil. She remembered Harry's agonised screams and Remus' heaving sobs at seeing the last of his brothers die before his eyes. She remembered the pain she had felt in her gut, unable to believe he was gone.

And then suddenly, inexplicably, he had returned. He had stumbled out of the Veil one day and fallen at Hermione's feet. Tonks grinned suddenly at the truth of that statement- he had fallen at Hermione's feet in more ways than one.

Hermione had cared for him, stayed with him. She had soothed his nightmares and his fears, she had nursed him back to health without any qualms. Hermione was perhaps the first person outside his brothers to show Sirius the intense loyalty that he gave to those closest to him; to care without question, without counting the cost. Yes, Sirius was the only man she could ever trust entirely to take care of Hermione, but in all honesty, Hermione was the only woman she would trust wholeheartedly with Sirius' heart; she was the only woman who was worthy of Sirius' love, if that were possible.

Glancing at her husband, she saw that he was watching the scene with a heartfelt smile on his lips. His brother was whole at last. The girl he loved almost as a sister had been broken, but she too would finally be whole. The two people he loved most in the world outside of his wife and son would heal one another and find happiness together.

Feeling her eyes on him, he turned to her and smiled, pure joy in his wonderfully expressive blue eyes. Tilting his head in a silent question, she nodded, and, taking his hand, followed him into the kitchen, giving Sirius and Hermione privacy in which to speak freely.

She knew if Hermione wanted her help, she would call for her. Sure enough, about ten minutes later, Sirius walked into the living room, a gentle smile on his face.

"Tonks, love, Mione wants to have a bath and she wondered if you might help her undress- she's still feeling quite weak." He gave a pained smile. "I'd offer to help her myself, but somehow, I think you might be the better choice."

Shaking her head, Tonks stood and followed him to Hermione's room.

Inside, however, she felt for her cousin- he was facing a deep love and attraction to a much younger woman, with no guarantee his feelings would be returned.

Walking into the bedroom, she turned her gaze to the girl in the bed. Hermione looked tired, her face pale with dark circles under her eyes.

However, the happiness which lit up her eyes when Sirius entered the room was truly beautiful to see. She knew something truly momentous must have happened, some new bridge in their relationship had been forged. The metamorphagus growled to herself- she was itching to know what had happened earlier!

"Wotcher, Mione! Still lazing about in bed, I see!" She joked, stumbling into the nightstand. She cursed inwardly at her clumsiness.

Hermione smiled tiredly at her friend. "Hello, Tonks. Yes, I seem to have slept in today. I feel rather sweaty and unappealing- could you please help me undress? I'll be alright once I get in the bath, but I don't think I'll be able to undress myself."

Tonks nodded. "No problem Mione."

Sirius shook his head tragically. "Alas, I have offered my services and my Mione refused me."

Blushing, Hermione shook her head at his theatrics. Seeing her blush, he winked at her as he sauntered out the door. "I'll be back in a moment, love- I'll just run the bath."

A moment later, she heard the sound of running water and the clinking of crystal bath decanters as he ran her bath. One final clink, a thud and a muttered curse later, he strolled back into the room and pulled back her blankets. Slipping his arms

about her he lifted her and cradled gently her in his arms, dropping a kiss on her forehead as he did so.

Hermione blushed. "Sirius, it's alright, I can walk-"

He cut her off. "Love, you were barely able to sit up on your own earlier, and it wore you out. Save your energy and just…let me look after you. Please?"

Looking into his eyes, Hermione blushed, then nodded. "Thank you Siri," she whispered, leaning ever so slightly into his broad chest.

Tonks almost felt as though she were intruding on a private moment- and perhaps she was.

Following the pair to the bathroom, she saw Sirius lower Hermione gently to the floor, holding her arm as she leant back against the wall.

"All right, love?"

Hermione nodded, giving him a small smile, tired though she was.

Dropping another kiss on the top of her head, he smiled warmly at her and left her with Tonks, closing the door behind him.

Tonks looked at Hermione consideringly. "How do you want to do this, Mione? Want me to remove everything before you get in or only the pyjamas?"

Blushing and inwardly cursing the strain on her core preventing her from performing magic for the time being, Hermione considered her options.

"I think perhaps if you could remove my pyjamas before I get in the bath, and my under things when I'm in the water, that might be best. I'm sorry, I'm just…"

Tonks smiled. "Don't worry Mione, I understand. If you're not comfortable with your body, there's no way you'll be comfortable with anyone else seeing it!"

Waving her wand, she removed Hermione's pyjamas with a softly spoken _divesto_, then helped her friend shuffle over to and step into the large marble bath, trying not to comment on the very noticeable weight-loss the younger woman had undergone in the two weeks she had been here.

Once Hermione had settled into the bath, Tonks pointed her wand and whispered _divesto_ again, then banished the now soaking bra and panties to the laundry hamper, along with Hermione's pyjamas.

The brown-haired woman sighed in relief as the soothing warm water, mixed with Frangipani extract, soothed her weary body and helped her to relax. She really ought to bathe herself, but she was somewhat embarrassed to do so whilst Tonks was there.

Sensing Hermione's sudden discomfort, Tonks cleared her throat. "Is there anything in particular you'd like to wear when you get out of the bath, Mione? I'll run and get your things from your room if you'll tell me what you want- can't have you wondering around naked, although I'm fairly sure Sirius won't complain….."

Blushing, Hermione replied, "I'd like my dark grey tracksuit, please, a plain t-shirt and just a plain bra and knickers. "

"Righto, Mione, won't be a minute."

As the pink-haired woman walked into the bedroom, Hermione seized her loofah and shower gel and, as quickly as she could, which was still considerably slower than usual, scrubbed herself clean. When she had finished, she lay back in the bath and waited, exhausted from the simple act of bathing herself. Perhaps Sirius had been right to carry her, she thought. Walking the few steps to the bathroom would have been unnecessarily exhausting and would probably have taken a ridiculously long time.

_Sirius_. There was someone she was entirely baffled about. He had been so very kind to her and had stayed with her. She knew that he loved her very much, as she loved him. However, lately, and especially today, there had been something else in his eyes, something different. She couldn't quite place it. Whenever he looked at her like that, though, it sent butterflies through her stomach. And he had kissed her….._Stop that_, she thought. _It wasn't a kiss- he was just calming me down, it was a gesture of comfort, that's all._ She was so preoccupied with her thoughts that she didn't notice that Tonks had come back with her clothes.

"Mione, are you ready to get out or do you want to stay in there a bit longer?"

Hermione jumped. "Oh, I'm sorry; I didn't hear you come in. Yes, I'm ready to get out now. Do you…do you think you could hand hold out that towel for me? If you could cast a drying charm when I'm already wearing the towel….."

"No worries, Mione!" Tonks summoned a large, fluffy white towel from the towel rack and held it open for Hermione at the edge of the bath, her eyes closed.

Hermione slowly clambered to her feet and stepped out of the bath and into the towel, which Tonks wrapped around her. The auror then cast a quick drying charm, followed by the _vestio_ charm, leaving Hermione fully dressed in her dark grey velour tracksuit and white t-shirt. Seeing that Hermione was teetering, she quickly darted under the girl's arm and steadied her.

"Sirius! Sirius, Mione's ready!"

Tonks gripped Hermione's waist and hoped that Sirius wouldn't take long, as she was uncertain how long she would be able to keep Hermione upright without some sort of levitation charm, which she was sure Hermione would not appreciate.

However, it seemed that Sirius had come running from the sitting room, because he was already opening the door to the bathroom and poking his head around questioningly. Seeing that Hermione was dressed he darted into the bathroom and straight over to her. Slipping an arm behind her neck and another behind her knees, he lifted her into his arms and carried her gently out to the living room. Tonks followed them once she had cast the usual cleaning charms on the bathtub.

Sirius had just settled Hermione on the couch that he and Remus had occupied only moments before, before sitting next to her and pulling her into him. Hermione was so exhausted, she did not even consider how it may have looked to Remus and Tonks- she was merely grateful for the support Sirius leant.

Curling his arm even more tightly about her, he turned and looked at her closely.

"Love, you look exhausted- are you sure you wouldn't prefer to go back to bed?"

Despite her exhaustion, Hermione nodded firmly. "Yes, I'm sure. I've spent the better part of the past two days in bed, and I need to get out of my bedroom for a while. Besides, I have to….to eat at some point and I won't do that in my bedroom!"

Sirius smiled at the stubborn expression on her face. _Merlin, but she's beautiful, inside and out. _

"Alright love, but when you find yourself getting too tired, say so and I'll take you back to bed."

Hermione nodded, and then turned to Remus, who sat smiling at the rather sweet scene in front of him.

"Hello Remus." She said softly.

"Hello Hermione," he smiled back. "I'm glad to see you are looking better than you were earlier."

She cast her eyes down, embarrassed. Had they seen her break down? How much did they know?

As if sensing her discomfort, Sirius whispered softly, "I called them here after I had put you to bed, sweetheart. They didn't see. I haven't told them anything…private."

Hermione nodded slowly, still ashamed. Then, seeming to steel herself, she looked up at them. "I'm so sorry for all of the bother I've put you through, all of you. I….I don't think there are words to express how sorry I am for the inconvenience I've caused you."

Remus stood and walked over to the couch. Sitting on the arm, the sandy-haired man gave her a smile and took one of her hands.

"Hermione, you have absolutely _nothing_ to apologise for. _Nothing_, do you understand? Many things have occurred and problems have arisen, but irrespective of what happens, we are your friends, we are your _family_, and we will always be here to support you. Do not think for a _moment _that you are or ever could be a burden."

Hermione's eyes filled with tears. "That's…that's very kind of you to say, Remus."

He looked her straight in the eye. "It's the truth. You are family, and we will do _anything_ for family- do not doubt it!"

Sniffling, Hermione nodded. Drawing a deep breath, she composed herself. When she was sure her voice wouldn't shake, she turned to Sirius.

"Siri," she began, not seeing his smile at the name, "you promised that you would tell me whatever happened today and how you found out that it was Ginny who was feeding me potions. I want to know- I _need_ to know- exactly what happened this morning."

Remus opened his mouth, but stopped when Sirius quickly held up a hand. "I will tell you everything, love, but before that, you need to eat. 'Dromeda left the meal plan here, so why don't I nip off to the kitchen and prepare something for you? You can eat and then we'll tell you anything and everything you want to know."

She shifted, looking slightly worried. "Siri, I don't know if I can….it's…I.."

Placing a hand under her chin, he turned her face directly to him, and she saw concern and that indefinable….something in his eyes.

"Love, I know it's hard, but I'll help you, remember? I'm with you the whole way."

Looking pleadingly at him, she was met by his determined stare. After a time, she hung her head and nodded.

Pressing a kiss to the tip of her nose, he began to get up only to stop mid-way at the touch of her hand on his arm.

"Siri? Please, tell me first? I…I need to know. I won't be able to eat or think of anything else until I know. Please, tell me?"

"Love, I really think you should eat something first….." Seeing the look on her face, however, he sighed. She needed to know- and really, who could blame her?

"Alright, love." Settling back down onto the couch, he slipped his right arm about her waist and rested his head against hers.

"Moony? Would you tell the story? I…I don't think I can, at the moment."

Remus nodded.

"Of course Padfoot." He sighed. "I'm sorry, Hermione, but most of this is going to be very painful for you to hear." She nodded to show she understood, and gestured for him to continue.

And so he told her. He told her of Sirius receiving an owl from Harry on Sunday night, asking to meet with promise of 'news'. He told of their arrival and the announcement of their engagement, of Ginny's behaviour, of Ron's. He told of Harry's bafflement. He spoke of potions and House protection. He even told her of Sirius' pinning Ron to the wall for speaking disparagingly of her scar. He told her the whole sorry affair. When he had finished, Tonks took over and described their conversation with George.

By this point, Hermione was sobbing openly, clinging to Sirius shirt. He soothed and comforted her, then finally decided to lift her into his lap and hold her in his arms, stroking her hair as she wept.

Finally, the onslaught of tears showed signs of slowing, and Sirius rubbed her back as she hiccoughed and sniffled, slowly calming down. Vision blurred by tears, he buried his face in her hair to hide his own anguish at her pain, breathing in the soothing scent of her hair.

Remus felt warmth at the scene even as he winced at Hermione's pain on discovering the duplicity of two people she had considered her closest friends. He glanced at his wife and smiled to himself- she seemed to have melted into a puddle at the sheer sweetness that seemed to be playing out in front of them.

The sound of Hermione's shaky voice brought his attention back to the matter at hand.

"I'm...I'm sorry about that. It just...it's too much. I never would have guessed..." she trailed off, trembling slightly as she tried to relax her grip on Sirius' shirt. It was a true indication of her exhaustion that she did not try to climb off Sirius' lap, but rather remained slumped against him.

Tonks interrupted the distraught girl. "Don't you even think about finishing that apology, Mione. You have nothing to apologise for- bloody hell, I hate to think how I would have reacted if I were in your position. You have every right to be upset. Nobody, least of all you, deserves to be treated like that."

Hermione was silent for a moment, then spoke a single word.

"Why?"

Tonks sighed. "Ginny was very jealous of your closeness with Harry. From what I've been told, she's been rather unhealthily obsessed with him since she was a small child. Unfortunately, it seems that obsession did not lessen or change as she grew up. If anything, it got worse. When she arrived on the scene and you were his best friend...well...I'm sure you can imagine how she would've reacted. You were a threat: you were closer to him than she could ever hope to be, you had shared things she could not hope to understand. He _trusted_ you, he opened up to you in a way he did not open up to anyone else. As long as you regarded him as no more than a friend, she did not act visibly. Your fourth year, however..." Tonks trailed off, looking meaningfully at Hermione.

Hermione blushed. "Fourth year I began to develop feelings for Harry and she decided to act. Was that when she began to administer the potion?"

Tonks nodded heavily.

Nodding slowly, Hermione shifted slightly and lay back against Sirius' chest. As she was frowning at the arm of the couch, deep in thought, and not looking up at Sirius, she missed the look of profound contentment that came over his face. Remus, however, did not, and turned away to hide a smile.

_Be happy, Padfoot_, he thought, hoping for his brother's sake that the young woman would accept Sirius' love, and soon. However, as he watched the two of them together, he was almost certain that he had nothing to worry about. Hermione loved Sirius, and soon she would find new expressions for that love. The thought made him glad- if anyone deserved happiness, it was these two.

Once again, Hermione's voice woke him from his thoughts.

"So Gi-_she_ was dosing me for two years?"

Both Remus and Tonks nodded.

Hermione shook her head disbelievingly. "I can't believe she would stoop so low. I mean, it isn't as though she had anything to worry about- Harry never showed the slightest interest in me! In fact, I'm not entirely certain he knows that I'm a woman." She paused, then laughed suddenly. Remus flinched at the bitter sound.

"The closest Harry ever got to giving me an honest compliment was telling me that he didn't think I was ugly. I believe that was in fifth year, if I remember correctly. Does that sound like serious competition to you?"

Seeing the worry on Sirius face, Tonks ventured a tentative question.

"Do you still have feelings for Harry?"

Hermione's eyes, reddened and slightly puffy from crying, widened. "Of course not! I grew out of that years ago." She shrugged tiredly. "I suppose it was inevitable- I was best friends with two boys and my teenage emotions were bound to become fixed on either one or the other. Perhaps if it had developed into a relationship, it might have worked- but that's neither here nor there, really. I haven't had those feelings for Harry for a very long time."

Sirius silently released the breath he had been holding. He was not and would never be jealous of his godson, but he did not know how his newly discovered feelings would have coped if Hermione were still harbouring feelings for Harry. Thankfully, this was not the case. His arms tightened about her slightly and tried to focus on what she was saying.

"And Ron was helping her do it... I suppose I ought not to be surprised, really- it is in keeping with his character to try and bring someone down whenever he feels inadequate, but still I...he was my friend! We went through so much together- how _could _he?" She cried softly, unable to understand this betrayal, her eyes shimmering with unshed tears.

Sirius gently stroked her hair. "I know, love. It's not easy to understand how and why one of your closest friends could turn on you."

Tilting her head up, she gazed into his steely gray eyes, seeing the remembered pain from his own past. He too had been betrayed by a friend, and in a far more sinister way than she. She softly patted his cheek and nodded in understanding. This common experience merely added to their shared bond; they did not require words for this. Words were insufficient. She knew he could read all she meant to say in her eyes.

Dropping her head, she snuggled back against Sirius's chest, reflecting on what she had been told. Suddenly, a thought struck her.

"Tonks? Did you say there was a _second_ potion in my system?

Nodding, the pink-haired woman spread her hands in puzzlement. "No idea what it is Mione- mum ran several tests but she couldn't tell what it was without a blood test. I think she was planning to ask you for a sample when she came back this evening." She frowned. "Tell you what, though- when I mentioned the second potion to Ginny, she looked terrified. I have a horrible feeling that not only is she responsible for it, but that it's something even worse than the _Humilitas_."

Hermione shook her head wearily, shuddering. "I...think we had best leave that topic for the time being. Until we know what the second potion is, I won't decide whether or not to press charges. It is...very hard for me to talk about this at the moment; it is too raw. Tell me...tell me about George. Did he really seem as though he would make some changes?"

Remus spoke up. "It is impossible to say for certain, of course, but yes, I think he has seen the error of his ways." He paused. "He certainly seemed very eager to make amends to you. Will you see him?"

Sighing, Hermione rubbed her forehead tiredly. "Yes, of course I will. So long as I know that his neglect was not derived from any disregard towards me, then I would be very pleased to see him. Just not quite yet- I think perhaps in a day or two might be best; I hope to have recovered by then."

Sirius nodded emphatically. "Good idea, love, I don't think you're really up to it at the moment."

Remus nodded slowly. "Alright. What...what about Harry?"

Hermione blanched and Remus hastened to add, "I know you said you didn't want to see any of them again, but I thought perhaps, seeing that circumstances were also cruel to him..."

Closing her eyes for a moment, Hermione pondered. Should see Harry? Could she without flying into a rage? Or was she better off remaining far away from him?

_He hurt me,_ a voice pointed out. _It's his own fault if he's hurting now._ However, another voice softly cried, _but he's sorry. And he was duped too. He probably feels alone right now._

Opening her eyes, she shrugged at Remus. "Honestly, I don't know what to think about Harry. I...I'm glad he feels remorse at the way he treated me, but I don't know if I can let him back into my life. I just don't know."

She paused suddenly as her eyes sharpened. "Was Harry tested for potions too?"

She heard Sirius' sharp indrawn breath. "Why do you ask that?"

Tilting her head up at him, she explained. "If Ginny was desperate enough to dose me to keep me away from Harry, what is to stop her slipping Harry a potion to try and help things along?"

Remus blanched. "We...didn't think of that. Merlin, who knows what she could have given him?" He turned to Tonks and then Sirius. "We'll ask Andromeda to test him as soon as possible."

Tonks nodded, her face pale and motioned to Remus. The two of them stood up.

"We'll go along now and see if we can't catch him somewhere. We'll bring Andromeda back here in two hours to check on Mione.'

Pulling out their portkey, Remus was about to activate it when Hermione's voice stopped them.

"Thank you...all of you...for defending me today. I...can't tell you what it means to me that you would go to such lengths for me, especially when, after all of the trouble I have given you, you would have every right to leave me altogether."

Tonks merely smiled. "It was our pleasure Mione- you're family. And we take care of our family." With that, they were gone.

Hermione sat silently on Sirius' lap for a time, before looking up at him. "Did you really take me under the protection of your House?"

Sirius nodded, smoothing her hair from her face.

Hermione shook her head in awe. "Why? It could cause you to lose influence, taking a muggleborn under your protection!"

Sirius laughed bitterly. "Only with the bigots, love, and I assure you, I couldn't give a damn what they think. To everyone who matters, and in the Wizenagamot, it won't make the slightest difference. Even if it did, though, I couldn't care less. I told you Mione, I would do anything and everything to protect you. If it this is what it takes to avoid your name being dragged through the mud, then so be it."

They were silent again, before Hermione giggled. Sirius quirked a brow in query.

Smiling, Hermione told him, "I can't believe I'm sitting on Lord Black's lap."

Sirius smiled. "You're not." At her questioning look, he said simply, "You're sitting on Sirius Black's lap, just Sirius."

Looking at her for a time as she pondered that, he sighed. "Come on love, it's time you ate something. I'll be back in a few minutes."

Shifting her to the couch, he stood, and with a kiss to her forehead, walked to the kitchen to prepare something to eat.

* * *

Almost an hour later, Hermione was back on Sirius' lap on the couch, snuggling into his chest, barely able to keep her eyes open. Sirius held her to him, soothingly rubbing her back as she drifted in and out of sleep.

Their late lunch (or rather, early dinner) had been a difficult affair. Sirius had prepared a simple chicken and vegetable soup, with a small loaf of bread on the side for each of them; a simple meal to ease Hermione back into eating normally. The raven-haired man frowned as he thought of Hermione's reaction. She had been agitated and afraid, bargaining with him to lesson her portions and trying to explain her reasoning. What had really shocked him, however, was the look of shame in her eyes as she looked at the food. Sirius had remained firm, however, and she had begun to eat, stopping every few bites and looking pleadingly at him. Sirius had soothed her, telling her that she was beautiful, that she deserved to eat, that she should not let Ginny's madness control her life. It had worked to a certain extent, calming her for a time before she would become agitated once more. In order to distract her, he talked to her about anything and everything. It was during this conversation that she had replaced her spoon in her half-filled bowl and turned to him.

"Sirius," she had frowned, "if you don't mind my asking, what happened between you and Lira? I understand if you don't want to talk about it, of course."

He had given her a tight smile, forcing himself to control his reaction to the mention of that woman.

"I'll tell you, love, if you finish your meal."

She had frowned, obviously torn between her fears and her desire to please him.

He had taken her hand and looked deeply into her eyes. "Please," he added softly. "For me."

She had drawn a deep breath, taken up her spoon and forced herself to continue eating a portion that was far larger than she had allowed herself at any time during the past few weeks.

It had taken her another twenty minutes, but she had finished the soup and even the loaf of bread, despite her having avoided carbohydrates like the plague for the past two weeks.

Trembling, she had turned to him, tears in her eyes and said simply, "For you."

He had been unable to resist gathering her onto his lap at that point and holding her tightly to him. After burying her head in his chest for a time, she had raised her head and looked at him. "Tell me?"

So he had told her. He told her everything from his attempted gift of the portkey ring right up until the plan he, Tonks and Moony had set in motion to catch Lira and her accomplices. She had stared at him in shock, unable to believe what had happened. Then, without warning she had seized his face between her hands, her normally soft brown gaze burning directly into his.

"You deserve better. She was nowhere near good enough for you, Sirius. Don't you dare think that you will never have the family you want because you are not good enough! You are MORE than good enough, do you hear me, Sirius Black? You are a good man, the best! You are kind and loyal, honest and sincere, intelligent and amusing, not to mention handsome and a lord to boot! Don't you dare doubt yourself!"

He had stared at her in awe; this was pure Mione, through and through- strong, passionate, kind and compassionate. Merlin, but she was _magnificent _like this!

She had softened her tone and stroked his cheek, then lowered her hands. "You are perfect Sirius, and any woman would be lucky to have you."

He had smiled bitterly. "Hardly perfect, love," he began, only for her to interrupt.

"And you are all the more human, all the more appealing for your imperfections, Siri." She had swallowed. "Believe me, Siri, any woman would be out of her mind not to want you."

He had been tempted, oh, _so_ tempted, to ask her whether or not _she_ could ever want him, because he didn't give a damn about any other woman, but he knew that it was too soon, that she was not ready to hear that yet. If he were perfectly honest with himself, he was not ready to tell her yet- he had demons of his own to face first, not the least of which was Lira.

They had talked for a little longer, then, at his suggestion, they had moved back to the couch to wait for Remus, Tonks and Andromeda. He had tried to suggest that she go back to bed to rest, but she had refused; she wanted answers and she was going to get them. Truth be told, he was so happy to see a spark of her old stubbornness that he had given in almost immediately.

And so they waited, curled up together, each taking comfort from the other.

A voice calling from the fireplace suddenly disturbed Sirius' thoughts and woke Hermione from her half-doze.

"Hello?"

It was _Signore_ Martinelli, his lined face peering out of the fireplace. When his eyes rested on Hermione, sitting comfortably on Sirius' lap, a smile lit his face.

"Hermione? Is that you, _piccola_?"

She jumped. "Enrico!"

"I am glad to see you awake, _piccola_. This old man, he has been worried for you!"

She blushed. "You are very kind, Enrico. Won't you come through? You can't be comfortable kneeling on the floor like that!"

A few seconds later, the tall, handsome old gentleman stood in the living room, dusting his robes.

_"Grazie,_ Hermione, it is good of you to care for my old knees! But you, how are you, _piccola?_ Signore Black, he told me you are ill, that you require immediate medical attention. He told me also that your magical core, it was strained. What has happened, _tesora_?"

Hermione glanced pleadingly at Sirius, who, seeing that she did not want to delve into the matter, shook his head slightly at Enrico. The old man understood at once, and changed the subject slightly.

"You will continue to rest, Hermione, yes? You need not worry for your work- as your superior, I authorise you to take as long as you require to heal. You must get better, little one. Your smile, it does not sparkle, and your eyes, they are tired. You must give yourself time to rest."

Seeing that Hermione was momentarily unable to speak, Sirius spoke up. "_Signora_ Tonks estimates that she ought to be able to return to work in a week's time."

Enrico nodded immediately. "You have it. You must not worry, _piccola_, your employment, it is waiting for you."

Nodding gratefully, Hermione forced herself to speak. "Thank you Enrico, you are very kind. I am so very sorry to have worried you."

The old man dismissed her concern with a wave of his hand. "Bah, you apologise to me? For what? Hermione, you are ill! I worry, we _all_ worry because we are, how you say, fond? Yes, fond, of you. You are a lovely young woman, with a large heart and an attractive personality. Do not apologise, _piccola_- we worry because we care for you."

Blushing, Hermione swallowed heavily. "I am...so very grateful to have such wonderful people to care for me. Truly, I am." A thought suddenly struck her.

"Enrico, please, may I work at home? I cannot sit at home all day and do nothing! I will go mad!"

The white-haired man seemed undecided. Seeing her pleading gaze fixed on him, he sent an amused glance to Sirius and nodded. "Very well, Hermione, you work at home. BUT you will not work too hard, yes? You rest and if you are unwell you do not work at all. Do I have your word?"

Eager to have something constructive to do, Hermione nodded. "I promise."

"_Bene,_ then I arrange for your documents to be brought here, and transcripts of all meetings that take place in your absence. In fact, I go now to get them. No, no, stay where you are- I think you are happy where you are, no? I do not blame you- _Signore_ Black is a handsome man." With that, he winked, turned on the spot and was gone, leaving a blushing animagus and a wide-eyed young woman in his wake.

A few minutes later, he had returned with a bundle of parchment and a small card. Hermione took them, looking at the card curiously. Seeing her confusion, Enrico explained.

"I think you will be unable to use magic for a few days yet, no? This is a business which provides the domestic services- they cook and clean." He smiled. "I think you like their work- they are cousins of little Robi."

Hermione beamed. "House elves? Oh, wonderful! I will call them first thing tomorrow. Oh, I am so glad to see them earning proper wages and being treated with dignity for the work they do! Stop laughing, Sirius!" she chided, hearing him chuckle quietly.

The raven-haired man smiled. "I'm not laughing at you, love. I'm just enjoying seeing your passion for those house-elves. It's good to see you acting like yourself."

Enrico nodded. "_Si_, it is good to see you happy, _piccola_. And the elves, I think they will be happy when you call them." He looked at Sirius, a twinkle in his eye. "They are very devoted to Hermione, _Signore_ Black. I think every elf in Italy knows she is here and is determined to help her in one way or another."

Sirius smiled. "It's Sirius, Enrico. As for the elves, well, I am not surprised. No one has fought as hard or as long for them as Mione has."

Hermione blushed. "Stop it you two."

Enrico grinned. "Look, Sirius, we make her blush. _Alora_, now that I see you are better, I go and leave Sirius to make you blush some more. I think this is a job for a young man, no?"

"Enrico!"

The old man winked and turned on the spot. "I see you tomorrow, Hermione!" He called, and was gone.

Sirius grinned, and waggled his eyebrows. "So, Mione my love, what can I do to make you blush a little more?"

Hermione blushed furiously, but before she could say a word, she heard several voices approaching. Listening, she discerned that they were Tonks, Remus and Andromeda. Andromeda, seeing that Hermione was awake, began to take a variety of supplies from her bag.

"Wotcher, Mione!" Tonks smiled, but Hermione noticed that it looked strained.

Sirius had also noticed. "Has something happened?"

Tonks shook her head. "Not exactly, it's just, well, we can't find Harry. We've tried everywhere, but no one knows where he is. He's not at home or at work."

Sirius thought for a moment. "He did say that he wanted some time alone...but I agree, he needs to be tested for potions as soon as possible, else any potions he takes could trigger a dangerous response. We need to know what's in his system. After we finish testing Mione, I'll contact him on the mirror and get him to meet you at yours and Moony's place so he can be tested. If that's alright with you, Dromeda?"

The black-haired woman nodded impatiently. "Yes, yes, it's fine. Now, Hermione, how are you feeling?"

"Better thank you, Mrs Tonks. I'm just weak, I suppose, and I tire easily."

Andromeda nodded. "This is to be expected, after the ordeal your body has been through. Now, I assume Sirius has told you of the unknown potion traces in your system?" Seeing Hermione's nod, she produced a thin glass vial. "In that case, what I would like to do is obtain a small blood sample and run some diagnostic spells on it- somewhat modified versions of Scarpin's revelaspell. Will you permit me to do this?"

Hermione nodded again, almost afraid at what the tests might reveal. Steeling herself, she took a deep breath and felt calm wash over her as she reminded herself that, whatever it was, it couldn't hurt her anymore. She _would_ beat this, whatever it was.

Andromeda quickly obtained a blood sample and began the requisite spellwork in the corner of the room. The others attempted to distract Hermione with idle conversation until the results were ready.

Minutes later, Andromeda rejoined the group, her expression grim.

Hermione swallowed. "What...what did you find, Mrs Tonks."

Andromeda placed a hand on Hermione's shoulder. "I am very sorry, Hermione, but I found traces of a potent Compulsion potion."

The others blanched, whilst Hermione was strangely expressionless. "Were you able to determine what the compulsion was, Mrs Tonks?" She asked quietly.

Nodding, the older woman grimaced again. "It was keyed to cause you to focus on a certain individual- naturally, I am unable to determine who it was. However, this potion was only fed to you for approximately one year." Pausing, she turned to her daughter. "I assume you know who fed Hermione this potion?"

Tonks nodded.

"And it was the same person who gave her the _Humilitas_?"

Another nod.

"I see. Hermione, do you recall any sudden...feelings for a person that you would never have considered before?"

Hermione nodded slowly, her face still expressionless. "Yes, I...believe I do. In fact, I am almost certain I know who the potion was keyed to, and why."

It was Sirius who asked, although he had a feeling he knew the answer already.

"Who?"

Hermione just looked at him.

"You...you mean Ron, don't you?"

She nodded. "Yes. Who else could it be? Thinking logically about it, he is the last person I could ever have considered having feelings for. Add to that the fact that we know who did this, and therefore we know their motive...well, it all fits."

Remus sank down into a chair, his face white. The others all watched Hermione worriedly; uncertain as to why she had not reacted at all to the disturbing news.

It was Tonks who voiced what they were all thinking. "What are you going to do?"


	13. Chapter 13: Help Me If You Can

**Disclaimer: I'm sure it comes as no great surprise that I don't own Harry Potter- all I own is my little story plot.**

_A/N: Well hello there, lovely readers! My apologies for the extended delay in posting, but the past few weeks have been, shall we say, nightmarish. As I said in my last post, I've been taking care of a sick relative which eats up a lot of time. Unfortunately, I also got very sick and had to pay a visit to ye olde hospitale. I think I could have gotten some writing done there if the nurse (who I am convinced JKR based Molly Weasley on) didn't keep taking away my laptop. The woman was mad, I tell you! However, I managed to get round her by hiding a notebook and pen under my pillow. Mwahahahahahaa!_

_So anyway, here we have the next chapter. I hope it's not too dull, but it's another one of my little scene setting compulsions that I feel is essential for the development of the storyline. I will try and post again soon to make up for the long delay._

_As always thank you for the reviews- they mean so very much to me- and thanks to those who sent well wishes to my relative. Keep reading and reviewing!_

* * *

_Hermione's flat, Roma: 8:00am local time_

Sirius yawned and shuffled out of the bathroom, clad only in a towel at his waist, still drowsy despite his long, hot shower. Rifling through the wardrobe, he extracted fresh boxers, blue jeans and a sapphire blue polo shirt and dressed, still only half awake. He had not slept particularly well, having kept an ear cocked in case Hermione had needed him during the night.

Unsurprisingly, she had slept very restlessly- not that he could blame her. His eyes darkened as he thought of the happenings of the night before. It was not every day that one discovered that someone they had considered a friend had been dosing them with a mind-altering potion which had resulted in severe mental and physical damage. He felt a painful clenching in his gut as he remembered Hermione's shock and dismay at finding out that Ginny had dosed her with the _Humilitas_ potion.

However, nothing could have prepared any of them for the discovery that Ginny had also dosed Hermione with a Compulsion potion. _Compulsion_. The very name made Sirius sick to his stomach, bringing back long-suppressed memories of his childhood in the House of Black. Where had Ginny learned how to brew such a foul potion? True to its name, the Compulsion potion did exactly that- it compelled its subject. It did not suggest, or entice, or attract, nor did it cause a temporary effect. No, the Compulsion was much darker than that. It _forced_ the will of the drinker to whatever nefarious ends the brewer had keyed into the potion. It could best be thought of as a liquid form of the Imperius curse. Like its spell counter-part, it was often underestimated and its dangerous nature overlooked in comparison with poisons and torturous potions. However, most people forgot that there was a very significant reason that the Imperius curse was one of the three Unforgivable Curses; it negated the subject's free will and this potion was much the same- it negated the subject's free will entirely with respect to whatever matter the potion was keyed to. If the potion demanded that the subject jump in front of a moving train, they would. If the potion demanded that they slit their wrists once a day at three pm precisely, they would, no matter where they were. If, as in Hermione's case, the potion told the subject to fall in love with a person, they would, or rather, it would cause intense attraction and make the subject_ believe_ and _feel_ as if they were in love, since no potion could actually force love itself.

It was a vile potion, taking away the subject's freedom and will; therefore, as with the imperious, the brewer must fully intend not only to _direct_ the subject to a particular end, they must fully intend to _negate_ the subject's free will. Not only did it require the foulest of ingredients, but it also a binding spell after it had been brewed, wherein the brewer bound the ingredients with their desire to control a particular aspect of the subject. If the brewer did not _fully_ _and utterly_ intend to control the subject in the relevant matter, then the ingredients would not bind and the potion would be useless- and considering the ingredients, most likely poisonous. Worse still, the effect was permanent. Once the potion was imbibed, the subject would not be rid of it unless they were able to obtain the _Libero _draught, an extremely complex potion, or unless they managed to fight it off themselves, in much the same manner that the Imperius curse could be repelled. However, as with the Imperius, very few people were able to repel the demands of the Compulsion potion.

Sirius growled aloud, his fury reigniting that _Hermione_ had been subjected to such a foul potion. He could not believe it. It was as if Ginny had decided not only to kill Hermione, but to kill her in the most painful and cruel way possible. She had administered unprecedented and ridiculously high doses of the _Humilitas_ potion, enough to completely decimate Hermione's self-esteem and cause a dangerous self-perception which resulted in self-hatred. She then decided to administer one of the most foul and _evil_ potions known to the magical world, keyed to force her affection towards a callous, selfish bastard, who carelessly and deliberately hurt Hermione on a daily basis, and whose only use for her was as a homework aid. His constant belittling and rejection, not to mention his deliberately flaunting another woman in her face, when combined with the effects of the _Humilitas_...Sirius shuddered. It was a miracle that Hermione had not taken her own life. Amazingly, it would seem that she had managed to throw off the compulsion in small stages, beginning with Ron's abandonment during the Horcrux Hunt, the potion clashing with her immeasurable loyalty to Harry, and ending, unsurprisingly with the abandonment on her birthday a few weeks ago. Certainly during the first year after the war, Hermione had struggled with her 'feelings' for Ron, having seen him choose someone else. However, the second year, she had 'gotten over' her romantic feelings for him, but nonetheless retained a strong loyalty to him despite his treatment of her. Only two weeks ago had her will reasserted itself enough to break the bond entirely, resulting in her move to Italy.

Tonks' question from the night before rang through his mind: "_What are you going to do_?" Grimacing, Sirius shook his head; it galled him that Mione had been placed in such a position- it was enough to tear anyone apart. However, despite the potions and everything else that had been done to her, her answer had shown her commendable inner strength.

_"I don't know," she had replied. "I realise that now that the Compulsion has entered into the equation, matters are even more complicated. But I think before I act, we ought to see if Harry has been dosed, and what he has been dosed with. If he also suffered at the hands of Ronald and Ginevra, then he deserves the chance to seek legal redress. When…when you have spoken to him and tested him, then we can speak of contacting the DMLE. But for myself, I…." she had trailed off, looking inexplicably sad, then forced herself to continue. "I will pursue the matter. Compulsion is a foul potion and that Ginevra possessed the will and the intent to complete the binding…..she is either very ill or far more sinister than I could have imagined. In either case, she ought to be made to account for this- it is not safe to leave her loose in society unchecked. But I will do nothing until you have spoken to Harry and we know whether this will be a complaint from the House of Black or a joint complaint from the Houses of Black and Potter."_

_Sirius had smiled proudly at her, silently applauding her strength and courage despite the shock she must have had._

_Of course, the problem was, no one had managed to locate Harry at all. He was not at work- all the Auror department would tell Tonks was that he had switched his evening shift that day for a morning shift the next day, citing personal reasons._

_He was not at his house, nor was he at Sirius' flat. No one knew where he was. So Sirius had retreated to his bedroom and called Harry on the mirror. It had taken several attempts to get through to him. When Harry had finally answered, Sirius was saddened at his appearance. His eyes were red and puffy and he looked miserable. It seemed he had truly taken the morning's events to heart._

_"Pup?" Sirius had asked. "Where have you been? Where are you? We've been trying to get hold of you for a few hours now."_

_Harry had frowned in puzzlement. "I told you I was going to take some time away from everyone, sort myself out a bit…has something happened, Padfoot?"_

_Sirius had snorted. "You could say that, pup. Look, we've been looking for you because we think it might be a good idea for you to be tested for potions as well."_

_Harry had blinked in shock. "You….you want to test me? What for? Unless….." His gaze had sharpened, reminding Sirius that his godson was also an auror with well-honed instincts. "Unless you've identified another potion in Hermione's system and it's bad." He had paused. "Am I right?"_

_Sirius sighed. "Yes, we have, pup, and you're right, it is bad. But that's not the reason we want to test you." He paused, unsure whether or not he ought to reveal the next fact. "Actually, it was Hermione's idea to test you. She thought if the Terrible Two had had no trouble potioning her, they might have given you something as well."_

_Harry's eyes had filled with tears. "H-Hermione thought of it? You mean, she still cares? After…after everything?" he choked._

_Sirius had given him a Look. "You know Hermione- did you honestly think she WOULDN'T care if they had done something like that to you, despite what's happened between you?"_

_Harry had simply bowed his head, his emotions still raw from everything he had learned that day._

_Sirius cleared his throat. "Look, pup, Dromeda wants to test you first thing in the morning. She'll meet you at Moony and Tonks' place. Don't mention anything to anyone in the meantime, alright?"_

_Harry nodded._

_"Where are you staying at the moment, pup? Just in case we need to get hold of you in a hurry."_

_Rubbing his eyes tiredly, Harry had told him, "I'm staying at the Potter property in Glasgow. Didn't think anyone would look for me here. Locked the wards down though- just in case."_

_Sirius had grinned. "Good thinking. Tell you what- you had better adjust the wards to let Tonks, Moony and myself through just in case we need to come to you in a hurry. I promise we'll respect your privacy and we won't come traipsing in whenever the mood takes us- I just don't fancy being bounced clear across Scotland if I I try to get to the place. OK, pup?"_

_Harry had nodded. "No worries Padfoot. I'll take care of it when we're done here."_

_After a pause, Sirius asked a question that had been preying on his mind somewhat. "Do you…do you need me to come out there, pup? Do you want me there when Dromeda does the tests?"_

_Sighing, Harry shook his head. "Yes I do, but Padfoot, I think you'd better stay where you are. From the sounds of things, Mione needs you much more than I do at the moment and we don't even know for sure that I've been dosed. Once I know for sure, I'll call you. Is-is that OK?"_

_Sirius smiled. "Of course Pup. And you know that if you do need me, I'll come straight away?"_

_Harry had nodded, smiling at his godfather. "Yeah, I know, Sirius. Thanks."_

Sighing, Sirius ran his fingers through his hair, shaking himself out of his thoughts. There was no point in dwelling on it now. He would do better to focus on the tasks at hand and get on it with the day.

_Right_, he thought. _First thing, I'll see if Mione is awake and if she wants some help having a bath. God help me if she does….._ He shuddered for a moment, wondering how he would manage to hide his reaction to her almost naked form.

_Get a grip, Sirius! You're a grown man, not a hormonal teenager! You'll help her and you'll bloody well behave!_

Taking a deep breath, he straightened his shoulders and marched into Hermione's room, prepared to do battle and defeat temptation- and found Hermione fast asleep. His expression softened and a gentle smile spread across his face. She looked so peaceful, so angelic that he was loath to wake her. However, it was time for her to take her potions- and eat some breakfast. Still, he took a moment to look at her before disturbing her. _God she's beautiful. That smooth, creamy skin, that sweet little nose, eyelids concealing chocolate brown eyes a man could drown in and oh, Merlin, those sweet lips….So soft, so full, sweeter than any chocolate…._ Finding that his thoughts were drifting into dangerous territory, he pulled himself together, and, with one last lingering look at her peaceful form, he moved quietly to the bed and reached out a hand, smoothing her soft brown curls from her face. He liked to see her like this- peaceful, undisturbed; he knew that as soon as he her eyes opened, the worry and stress of the day before would be reflected in their hurt brown depths. Taking a deep breath, he called her softly, stroking her cheek. "Mione, love, time to wake up."

Hermione was submerged in a deep and mercifully dreamless sleep. Suddenly, a voice called her from the depths of slumber and into some semblance of wakefulness. She groaned, trying to ignore the voice and re-enter her previous state of blissful nothingness, only for the voice to call her again. Suddenly, she felt a hand cup her cheek- a warm, large hand. She thought it felt rather nice caressing her face and almost involuntarily turned her face into it. She heard a deep chuckle and felt warm breath on her ear. She shivered at the warm breath tickling her ear, before hearing the voice whisper to her.

"Mione, love, I know you're in there- time to wake up, sweetheart." The voice was warm, deep and very smooth. It was a nice voice, and sounded so very familiar. Sighing, she gave up and pulled her mind into wakefulness, opening her eyes and saw deep grey eyes staring directly into hers.

"Sirius!" She jumped, not expecting to find him quite so close to her.

He chuckled again, a deep, throaty sound that made her shiver for some reason.

"Morning sweetheart- you looked as though you were enjoying a lovely dream. Did I interrupt anything?" He winked.

Blushing, Hermione shook her head. "Of course not Sirius. Actually, those last few hours since I last….woke up, during the night- she blushed, remembering how he had held and soothed her until she had fallen asleep- "I had no dreams at all. It was wonderfully relaxing!"

He smiled. "I'm glad, love. You certainly looked peaceful and I hated to wake you, but it's time for your potions and some breakfast."

Sirius saw her smile falter at the mention of food, and her eyes dim as she remembered the reason for her potions. Knowing what she was thinking, he dropped a kiss on her forehead and stroked her cheek comfortingly.

"Remember love, one day at a time. I'm here with you and we'll get there. You're not alone."

Seeing her visibly steel herself, she nodded and drew in a deep breath, giving him a shaky smile. "I know, Siri. I…I'm so lucky to have you; I don't think I could do it alone."

Feeling a warm glow in chest at her words, he looked tenderly at her. "And you'll never be alone, my Mione- never. Now, I think you might like a bath before breakfast, sweetheart- am I right?"

Hermione smiled, blushing. "Yes please, Siri. I…I think I'm strong enough to bathe myself- I feel better today."

_Thank God for small mercies,_ he thought. He didn't let his relief show, however. Winking cheekily at her, he flung an arm dramatically to his forehead. "Oh Mione, and I was so looking forward to bathing you myself. " Sighing theatrically, he continued, "I suppose I'll have to settle for carrying your lovely person into the bathroom, Miss Granger."

"Oh, Siri, really, there's no need- I'm sure I can manage by myself today-" He cut her off, gently shaking his head.

"Mione, it was only yesterday that you could hardly shuffle three steps on your own, and you were not even able to undress yourself- please, let me just carry you into the bathroom, alright? I'll leave it to you to decide whether or not you need help undressing, although I beg you- don't over exert yourself because you're too embarrassed to ask for my help, alright sweetheart?"

Blushing even more profusely, she nodded. "Alright, Sirius," she mumbled.

The raven-haired man beamed. "Excellent! And now, my favourite part," he grinned, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively at her before sweeping back the bedclothes and gathering her into his arms. Grinning roguishly, he strode theatrically into the bathroom, only to stop dead in his tracks - the bathtub was completely empty. _Bloody hell! _He had forgotten to prepare the bath. _How could I forget to fill the bloody bathtub? Smooth, Padfoot, very smooth!_

He was, however, drawn out of his self-recrimination by a giggle. Looking down at the woman he held in his arms, he was hard-pressed not to smile. She was giggling happily; an irresistible, happy sound he could not get enough of. Merlin, but he loved it when she giggled! She sounded so happy, so….at ease. It soothed his worried mind to hear the delightful sound- she had not had much to laugh about, recently.

"Laughing at a forgetful old man are we, Mione? Oh, my poor, wounded heart! How shall I bear the agony? For my Mione doth mock me!" He tragically declaimed.

If anything, she giggled even more, gasping a little. "Oh, Siri, I'm sorry, but the look on y-your face! You were so determined to t-to help me into the bath and then when you realised that you hadn't prepared it, the look on your f-face, Siri…" she trailed off, succumbing to a fit of giggles.

Sirius smirked to himself; here was a prime opportunity for a wee bit of a prank. Hanging his head in false dejection, he sighed. "I…I can't help getting older love. It's not easy on me you know."

Stifling her giggles, Hermione looked up, worried that perhaps she had actually hurt his feelings. "Siri? I'm sorry, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. And you're not old! You're only thirty-five, why, you're in the prime of life!" Slipping a hand under his chin, she lifted his head - only to find him grinning wickedly at her.

"Oh, Siri! You beast, I thought I had honestly upset you, and you were playing with me! Oh, you mangy old mutt!"

If anything, his grin grew wider. "Ah, but I'm not old, sweetheart- a very beautiful lady told me that I was in the prime of life."

Hermione huffed, but couldn't help but grin at the handsome man cradling her in his arms. He was so cheeky, so irrepressibly cheerful this morning that it was almost impossible to be annoyed at him.

Grinning, he touched his forehead to hers for a moment, then set her down very gently on the ledge of the bathtub.

"If you'll just give this old man a minute, I'll have the bath up and ready in a moment, sweetheart."

A few minutes later, the warm, fragrant tub was ready for use. Turning to the brown haired woman who was gazing longingly at it, he tilted his head questioningly.

"Do you need help, love?"

Blushing, Hermione thought for a moment. "No….I don't think I do Siri. I think I can manage the clothes on my own."

Looking unconvinced, he nodded slowly. "Alright, Mione. Tell you what- you give it a try and if you need help, call out- I'll wait in your bedroom, alright? I'll just nip off and get a book to read while I wait for you and I'll be right back."

Hermione nodded. "Alright, Sirius. I really do think I'll be alright though!"

"Humour me, love," he smiled wryly as he walked towards the bedroom, closing the door behind him.

Hearing him walk out of the bedroom, Hermione took a deep breath. _I can do this_, she thought. _Oh, God, it would be beyond embarrassing to ask Sirius to help me undress. Right, come on Hermione, clothes off!_ However, at that moment, the call of nature made itself known. Sighing, she wriggled across the ledge, then standing on wobbly legs, shuffled to the loo.

That done, thankfully without needing assistance, she managed to lean over to the sink and wash her hands, then shuffled back to the bath. _Merlin, but this is tiring!_ She grumbled. Sitting on the ledge once more, she sat panting, trying to work out how she would remove her pyjamas. The top would be easy enough to remove, she decided; she could sit on the ledge and slide it off. Then she could just slide off the bottoms and slip into the tub. No need to stand and further exhaust herself; she still felt remarkably weak. Andromeda had said that would start to improve slowly by tomorrow, but that it would take time and she was not to over-exert herself or she would make things worse.

Sighing, she wearily raised her arms and slowly slid off her pyjama top. _Thank God I don't sleep in a bra, _she thought. _I really don't think I'd have had the strength to get it off._

She sat resting on the ledge for a few moments. Then, gathering her strength, she tugged at her waist of her pyjama bottoms and wriggled her hips. _Almost, _ she grunted to herself, _come on, nearly there…._ Just as she thought the elastic would slip over the curve of her hips and down her legs, she slipped and fell, squealing in surprise.

Meanwhile, Sirius sat staring at his book, not really paying any attention to it, his focus entirely on the girl behind the bathroom door. Was she alright? She was awfully quiet in there. He deliberately tried not to focus on the fact that she would be naked. _And wet. And slippery, _his minded added helpfully. "Shut up!" he growled aloud to himself.

Staring at the page in front of him, he tried to re-read the paragraph for the fifth time. What the bloody hell had he chosen, anyway? He had no clue, having simply stared at Hermione's library for minutes on end without seeing anything in front of him, and then, in a fit of pique, had simply grabbed a random book and marched out. He focused on the words in front of him once more.

_"It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair, we had everything before us, we had nothing before us, we were all going direct to Heaven, we were all going direct the other way-in short, the period was so far like the present period, that some of its noisiest authorities insisted on its being received, for good or for evil, in the superlative degree of comparison only."_

Ah. Dickens. He had inadvertently grabbed one of Mione's muggle books, _A Tale of Two Cities_. He began to read with a greater enthusiasm; he had not read this particular book in many years. In fact, if he recalled correctly, the last time he had read it was a few weeks before he had been disowned. He had taken to reading muggle literature about the house, mostly to annoy his bigoted mother and also, he had found to his great surprise, because he enjoyed it.

However, his foray into the world of literary nostalgia was cut short by the sound of a loud _thud _and a surprised squeal from behind the bathroom door. Flinging aside his book, he jumped to his feet and ran to the door, knocking madly.

"Mione? You alright love?"

"Yes," she called back breathlessly. "I'm alright."

"What happened? Did you fall? Do you need me?"

"I'm fine, I just slid off the edge of the tub." She called back.

"Are you sure you're alright on your own?" He asked.

"Yes, I'm fine, Siri, really," came the reply.

He frowned. "If you're sure, love…..I'm right outside, OK?"

"OK."

Despite her assurance, he decided he would be wiser to stay near the door in case she changed her mind and called for him.

Meanwhile, Hermione lay cursing herself on the bathroom floor. _Idiot! Now what am I going to do?_ There was nothing for it, she supposed. She lay still for a moment, gathering all of her strength (such as it was) and, bracing her arms on the floor on either side of her, tried to sit up. It didn't work. She drew a deep breath and tried again, cursing the temporary weakness in her limbs , but to no avail; she could not get up. She silently cursed again, her eyes filling with humiliated tears. _They were right- she was a weak, useless nothing. Look at her now, the brightest witch of her age, unable to stand on her own. Useless. Pathetic. _She choked, trying desperately to keep the tears at bay. _Nobody wants you- alone, weak, useful to no one…..NO! _She silently cried to that nameless, shadowy presence in her mind. _That's not true! Sirius wants me, Remus and Tonks want me, Teddy, George….You're nothing but a lie, a distortion from Ginny and I WILL NOT LET YOU WIN. You have taken enough from me!_

With a sudden and intense rage fuelling her movements, she planted her arms on either side of her body and pushed, slowly pushing herself into a sitting position, leaning her back against the bathtub. Breathing hard, she took a moment before slowly trying to push herself to her feet. However, despite her anger, she was unable to move any further; her body was simply too exhausted. Bowing her head, hot, angry tears rolled down her face. _I WILL fight this_, she vowed.

Then she laughed; a harsh, bitter sound that chilled Sirius to the bone as he stood waiting behind the door. How was she going to fight this when she could barely move as it was? _The same way you learned to fight before you became a witch_, a voice whispered._ With your mind._ _Yes_, she thought slowly. Perhaps she was too physically weak now to regain her strength and her independence, but she _could_ fight in other ways. Her meals; she could force herself to eat and enjoy everything Sirius placed in front of her without trying to bargain or reduce the portion. She could make an effort to fight the negative images in her mind. She could start doing some work at home, perhaps as early as tomorrow. She could fight, in her own way, and she would. She would not let this shadow of Ginny's madness rule her life any longer. Yes, she knew it would be difficult and she would fall many times, but, for the first time in a very long time, she was ready to FIGHT.

First things first- there was a nice hot bath behind her and she wanted to get in. If she couldn't step into it herself, she would ask Sirius to place her in it. Thankfully, she was still wearing her knickers. She could cover the rest of her body until Sirius placed her in the water, then remove the rest of her clothes in the water as she had yesterday. Sirius could vamish them to the laundry later. She trusted Sirius; therefore she would swallow her shame and her pride and ask for help.

"Siri?" She called softly, clutching the discarded pyjama top to her breasts.

"Yes love?"

"I ….I need some help, if you wouldn't mind."

There was no reply, when suddenly the door opened and Sirius stuck his head in. Seeing the position she was in, he entered the bathroom and walked quickly over to her, so worried about her that he failed to notice what she wasn't wearing.

"Mione, sweetheart? Are you alright?"

She nodded shamefacedly, her cheeks flushed with embarrassment.

"I was just trying to undress and I fell- then I found it somewhat difficult to get up again. This was the best I could manage."

She looked up at him, exhaustion clear in her face.

"Would you mind helping me into the bath? I…I don't think I can stand on my own."

He nodded immediately and slipped his hands in place. "Ready, love?"

Seeing her nod, Sirius gently picked her up and cradled her in his arms, whilst turning to place her in the bath. Unfortunately for him, he very quickly became aware of _exactly_ how little she was wearing.

_Oh, God, _he groaned to himself. _All she's wearing is a pair of knickers. She's practically naked. So soft…. NO! Stop that, you randy bastard. She's ill, stop that!_

"Sirius?"

His tortured thoughts were interrupted by Hermione's tired voice. He looked down to see her looking questioningly up at him.

He smiled. "Sorry love, got lost in my thoughts for a moment, there. Right, into the bath with you!"

With that, he gently leaned over and lowered her into the bath until she was sitting with her back against one of the sides of the tub.

"Alright now?"

She nodded.

"Are you…are you sure?" _Please let her say yes,_ he groaned to himself. _I need to get out of here before I do something stupid._

She smiled tiredly. "I'm sure Sirius, although…." she trailed off, biting her lip nervously.

"…Although I might need some help getting out of the bath."

Sirius nodded, forcing himself to smile mildly at her whilst trying desperately force the image of her dripping wet and naked, rising from the bath, from his mind.

"No worries, love. I'll be right outside, just call me when you are ready. Er, would you like me to get some clothes for you? I can…dress you." Suddenly realising how that sounded, and mentally cursing Tonks for leaving him to handle Hermione's bath on his own, he hastily added, "Er, I mean, _vestio_, you know?"

Looking at him strangely, she nodded slowly. "Yes, thank you that would be wonderful, Siri," she frowned, all the while wondering what could possibly make Sirius Black blush like that. Seeing that he was waiting, she added hastily, "Just a tracksuit and t-shirt, please, any one will do….er, and just plain…under things, please." She felt her cheeks heating and mentally cursed her inability to perform magic- what she wouldn't give to perform a summoning charm and avoid this awkward situation!

For some reason he paled slightly, then smiled and nodded, before turning and leaving the bathroom, closing the door behind him.

Closing her eyes, she sighed and enjoyed the warm water washing over her, taking time to rest before she attempted to wash.

Ten minutes later, she opened her eyes and reached for the shower gel and her loufah, wondering what had bothered Sirius so much.

Meanwhile, the man in question was currently debating whether or not to use a summoning charm to retrieve Hermione's clothes. He just didn't feel it was right to go rifling through her things- especially her underwear. Making a snap decision, he pulled out his wand and summoned the tracksuit she had worn yesterday, and pulled out the topmost t-shirt on the pile on the shelf in the closet. Then, turning to the underwear drawer, he took a deep breath and, seeing a plain grey pair of knickers and matching bra peeking out from amongst the multitude of silk and lace, pointed his wand and whispered _accio_.

Nothing happened.

Pointing his wand, tried again.

Nothing happened.

Frowning, Sirius pointed his wand at another of Mione's t-shirts and whispered _accio_- it came zooming over immediately.

_That's odd_, he thought. _It worked on the other things…why not this?_ Thinking quickly, he waved his wand and cast _specialis revelio_- and found that there was an anti-summoning charm on the underwear drawer.

Sirius stared in shock for a moment, then narrowed his eyes. _Tonks_. _I am going to murder that woman!_

He knew immediately that she had cast the anti-summoning charm on Hermione's underwear to make things a little more…uncomfortable for him. Well, he was Sirius Black- he was not embarrassed by _anything_, let alone by a few scraps of fabric! Growling, he marched up to the drawer and yanked the offending items into his hand, refusing to consider the fact that in a few minutes they would be adorning and caressing the most luscious and secret parts of his Mione…

_Great Merlin Tonks, you are dead as soon as I see you! _He growled to himself, forcing himself not to feel the soft cotton garments as he quickly tossed them on top of the t-shirt he had chosen.

Deciding there was no point in trying to read at the moment because he was sure Mione would call him at any moment, he sat on the chair near the bed and waited, deliberately thinking of everything but the soft and utterly simple garments laying a a few feet a away….garments that would cover her beautiful curves….._Stop it_, he growled to himself, forcing himself to list the steps in the Animagus transfiguration as a distraction. _Think of anything else_! _Anything but how soft her skin will be compared to the fabric….STOP it!_

_Bloody_ _hell_, he groaned aloud. God help him when Hermione decided to get out!

* * *

Twenty minutes later, Hermione was settled comfortably on the living room couch, dressed in her grey tracksuit and light blue t-shirt. Sirius was in the kitchen, ostensibly preparing breakfast, but in reality trying to sooth his frazzled nerves.

The sight of Hermione wrapped in a towel whilst he knew she wore _nothing_ underneath would haunt him for many nights to come. Even ill, pale and exhausted as she was, to him, she was still the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. His hormones had reared at the sight of her in nothing more than a piece of fabric. He thanked Merlin that she had not brushed against the rather visible evidence of his attraction to her; that would have been embarrassing for both parties, judging from the blush on her cheeks as he had pulled her towel clad form from the bath.

Breathing deeply, Sirius filled a glass with water and drank. When his heart rate had slowed a little, and his somewhat _noticeable_ _reaction_ to the young witch had abated, he began to think about making breakfast. Scooping up Andromeda's meal plan from the counter, he examined it. Seeing that there were a number of breakfast choices listed, he decided to consult Hermione as to which she would prefer.

He strode out of the kitchen and into the living room. "Hermione, love, 'Dromeda's given us a few choices for breakfast, I was wondering which you would prefer?" he asked, showing her the list.

Frowning, she looked carefully at each option and sighed. "I suppose a little cereal is out of the question?" Seeing the small frown that marred his forehead, she sighed again. "Alright, alright, no need to look at me like that Siri! I suppose the poached eggs would be best."

Sirius gently smiled. "I know it's tough, love, but we can do it- together." Dropping a kiss on the top of her head, he turned to leave.

"Wait!"

He turned toward her, cocking an eyebrow in query. "What is it, love?" He almost expected her to try to argue her way out of breakfast, as she had done last night with dinner.

"Remember how Enrico told us about the elves' housekeeping business?"

A slow grin spread across the raven-haired man's face. "Let me guess- you'd like to try them out?"

Blushing, she nodded sheepishly, plucking the card from the small table that sat beside the leather lounge.

"I thought we could engage them to prepare meals this week, and perhaps clean the apartment, at least until I'm back in fighting form, so to speak. I mean, if it's alright with you Siri. This is your home too now, _our _home, at least for a while, and…and you have as much right to make these decisions as I do."

_Our home,_ he repeated to himself. Basking in the warm glow that suffused his being at that happy thought, he stepped over to the couch and sat beside her, slipping an arm about her waist. "Sweetheart, I think it's a marvellous idea and I'd be very pleased to know that the money is going to such a worthy cause. Why don't you go ahead and call them?"

The sunny smile that lit her face warmed his heart even further. Merlin, he'd agree to anything she wanted if it caused her to smile like that!

Glancing at the card in her hand, she called, "Fina! Ale!"

Two small pops sounded immediately and two elves stood in front of them. The female elf wore a neat grey skirt and blouse, and a small pointed hat with holes cut out for her ears, whilst the male wore brown trousers and shirt with matching hat. Both were smiling widely.

"_Buongiorno, signore e signora. Siamo _Fina_ e _Ale_, al vostro servizio!"_ They chanted together.

As the translation spell did its work, Hermione knew that they had said, "Good morning, Sir and Madam. We are Fina and Ale, at your service!"

Smiling happily at the two elves, Hermione used the little Italian she knew.

"_Buongiorno_, Fina _e_ Ale! _Sono_ Hermione Granger." She paused, wishing she knew how to introduce Sirius, but thankfully, he intervened with a smile of his own.

"_Buongiorno_, Fina _e_ Ale. _Sono_ Sirius Black, _un_ _amico_ _di_ _Signorina_ Granger. _Scusa, ma possiamo parlare in inlegese? La Signorina _Granger_ non parla italiano."_

Hearing that Sirius was asking them to converse in English, Hermione cast him a grateful smile, mentally resolving to begin her Italian lessons as soon as possible.

However, her train of thought was interrupted by two excited squeaks.

"_Signorina_ Hermione Granger? This is an honour! _Si_, we talk in English for the _Signorina_ Granger!" squealed Fina.

Ale was not to be outdone. "We hear from Robi that the _Signorina_ Granger, she is in Roma, but we did not expect that we will have the honour of meeting her!"

Hermione blushed, but before she could get a word in, Fina had already turned to Sirius.

"We are honoured to meet the friend of _Signorina _Granger! The _Signore_ Black, he must be noble indeed to have the friendship of one such as _Signorina_ Granger."

Both elves bowed low to the somewhat stunned witch and wizard on the sofa, then stood looking at them expectantly.

"What we can do for _Signorina_ Granger and _Signore_ Black?"

Managing to gather herself together, Hermione managed to get out what she wanted to say. "I was wondering if you would be so good as to help me- help _us_- with a few domestic chores this week. I am unwell and will not be able to use magic for a few more days at least" here the elves gasped in shock- "and would be so very grateful if you would be able to clean the apartment and perhaps prepare a few meals for the two of us?"

The two elves stood stock still, their expressions a comical mix of extreme joy and overwhelming sadness. Hermione wondered what could have caused such a reaction. She did not have to wait long to find out.

"_S-Signorina_ Granger is ill?" Fina asked, trembling, eyes full of tears. "What has happened, _Signorina_ that you cannot use magic?"

Smiling reassuringly at the two elves, Hermione explained. "I was overtaxing myself and it lead to my straining my magical core rather badly, which made me ill. I am alright now, just rather weak and I am not permitted to use magic for a few more days at least, which is why I would very much appreciate your help."

Sniffling loudly, Ale asked, "_Signorina_ only wishes our help for _this_ week?_"_

With a somewhat mystified expression on her face, Hermione glanced at Sirius, who shook his head slightly.

"Er, well, no, I mean, I hadn't considered a long term engagement, but I'm sure we could arrange something…." She stuttered.

This seems to be the right thing to say because the two elves beamed at her, wiping away their tears.

"We are so happy to be of service to _Signorina_ Granger. We do good work for you, you see _Signorina_ and _Signore_! What we can do to start?"

Sirius, who until now was torn between amusement and bemusement, showed them Andromeda's meal plan.

"_Signorina_ Granger's _dottoressa _has left her this plan, which we are to follow for the next week at least. I think we had decided on the poached eggs for breakfast. Perhaps you would be so good as to prepare this for the both of us? Oh, but I think I'd like an extra egg with mine." With a wink at Hermione, he added, "I'm a growing boy."

The two elves bobbed their heads madly. "_Si_, _si_, of course!" With that, they popped out of the room.

Hermione turned bemusedly to Sirius. "What just happened here? I thought we were getting help for a week, now I find I've agreed to more- and I don't even know what it is I've agreed to!"

Trying (very unsuccessfully) to hold back a laugh, Sirius told her, "Love, I think they're hoping you'll hire them on a permanent basis." Unable to help a small grin, he explained, "I think they are very excited to be working for the magnificent _Singorina_ Granger. In fact, I'm sure if you asked them to move in here and work for free, they just might do it!"

Hermione gasped. "No! I could never do that!"

"I know that love, and I'm not suggesting you should. All I'm saying is that Fina and Ale seem very happy to be working for you, so why not get arrange for them to clean the house once a week permanently? It will make them happy, you can pay them, so they won't be abused or taken advantage of and we'll have a nice clean flat."

Hermione frowned, chewing her lip. "I don't know….."

Sirius gently took her chin and pulled her face up until her eyes met his. "If it really bothers you, love, then we won't do it. You know I don't want to do anything that would make you uncomfortable."

She smiled. "I know, Siri, it's not that. I just…" She flushed guiltily. "I just feel that it would be terribly lazy of me to do that. I know it probably sounds silly…"

"Love, it's not silly. I understand, perhaps better than most, the need for hard work to stave off idleness, but believe me when I say I don't think even the severest critic could accuse you of idleness, sweetheart. You work harder than anyone I know! There's nothing wrong with asking for a little help, remember?" he reminded her, gently stoking her face. Somewhere, in the back of his mind, a small voice told him that he was being far too obvious with his affection too soon. The rest of his mind politely told the voice to sod off and enjoyed the feeling of her soft skin under his fingers.

Blushing lightly at his close scrutiny, she slowly nodded. "Yes, I…I suppose you're right. And it isn't as though I'm binding them to me, they'll just be employees."

Smiling at her need to justify the arrangement, he stroked her cheek one last time and pulled her closer to his side.

"I'm sure they'll be very happy, love." Before he could say anything further however, there was a loud pop.

"_Signorina_, _Signore_, breakfast is served in the dining room," Ale announced, bowing low.

Trying to maintain his serious demeanor and forcing himself to contain his chuckle so as not to offend the earnest little elf, he stood fluidly and, turning to Hermione, took her hand and kissed it, his eyes sparkling mischievously.

"_Signorina_, will you permit me the honour of escorting you to the dining room?"

Seeing the mischief in his eyes, she smiled back with a cheeky look of her own, one he hadn't seen there for quite some time. "But of course, _Signore_ Black."

With that, he swept her into his arms and turned to Ale, who stood waiting.

"Ale, would you be so good as to lead us to the dining room?"

Beaming, the small elf bowed again and walked regally from the room, his pleasure evident at Sirius' manner and courtesy, and lead them into the next room.

Seeing the two places the elves had set for himself and Hermione, he walked over to one chair, which Ale pulled back, and placed the young woman carefully into the chair.

He then bowed formally to her and walked around the table, where Ale pulled out a chair for him, and sat down.

Ale clicked his fingers and two small porcelain bowls of yoghurt appeared in front of each of them. Looking closely, Sirius saw that there were pieces of fresh blueberry and strawberry mixed liberally throughout the yoghurt. It certainly smelled delicious, he thought.

Ale bowed, and retreated to the corner.

Hermione looked at the yoghurt, her expression a heartbreaking mix of longing and guilt.

Cursing the size of the table (which made it impossible for him to reach her hand), he caught her eye and smiled gently at her.

"Come on love, time to eat. Remember, you deserve this, and more. You are beautiful and _perfect. _You have no need for shame," he said softly enough that only the two of them heard it.

Smiling tremulously at him, Hermione took a deep breath and picking up the small silver spoon that lay beside her bowl, she began to eat.

An hour later, they had finished a delicious breakfast of yoghurt mixed with fresh fruit, poached eggs on toast, orange juice and coffee. Despite Hermione only having had to eat a single egg and one piece of toast, it had taken thirty minutes for her to eat the egg. She had felt immensely guilty after eating the yoghurt, and was torn between her desire to please Sirius and overcome her irrational thoughts, and the fear that she would only get fatter and fatter if she continued to eat. However, he had been surprised at the determination evident in her features, and was even more pleased that she did not attempt to leave the food unfinished or negotiate the portion size. _Something's changed,_ he thought. _I wonder what….._ He knew, however, that she would tell him when she was ready.

She had even forced herself to drink a glass of freshly squeezed orange juice and a cup of black coffee. Whenever she seemed to be having trouble with her meal, she would glance at him, and he would smile at her, his eyes telling her louder than any words could say that she was beautiful and had nothing to be ashamed of. To his utter joy and disbelief, this was enough for her to continue eating.

Having finally finished breakfast, Sirius had carried Hermione back to the living room, where she sat resting.

Deciding to leave her to rest quietly for a moment, he had walked outside to the balcony and sat in the sun, looking sightlessly at the view before him. A small pop interrupted his tumultuous thoughts, causing him to look down at the somewhat nervous little elf standing in front of him.

"_Signore_, we have finished the cleaning of the dishes and the kitchen. Is there anything else you like us to do?"

Smiling, he took the elf's hand and patted it. "G_razie_, Fina, breakfast was superb. I don't think there is anything else we need at the moment, but I believe _Signorina_ Granger wishes to discuss a more permanent arrangement with you and Ale. If you would both be so good as to come with me to the living room and we will speak with her."

With another small pop heralding Ale's entrance, he stood and began to lead the elves back inside the house. He was stopped, however, by a small voice asking, "_Signore_? May we speak with you a moment?

Turning back towards the elves, he smiled and crouched down to their height.

"Of course, Ale. What would you like to speak with me about?"

Taking a deep breath, the little elf whispered, "Did not _Signorina _Granger like the food? She…she did not eat willingly. Please, if we do something wrong, we ask you to tell us so we please her better."

Ah. The elves had noticed her reluctance to eat and misinterpreted the reasons behind it. Sirius was torn; on the one hand, he wanted to tell them the real reason and set the elves' minds at ease, on the other hand, he felt he had no right to reveal the real reason behind Hermione's fear of food without her explicit permission.

Knowing that either way, Hermione would be mortified, he decided on a compromise.

"Ale, Fina, neither of you has done anything wrong; in fact, you served a most excellent breakfast which I thoroughly enjoyed. However, what you must understand is that _Signorina_ Granger has been ill and as a result of that illness is finding it somewhat difficult to eat at present. You both saw the list of meals that she must follow?"

The two eleves nodded.

"This list was written by her _dottoressa_ because of this difficulty with food. It may take some time before she can eat without difficulty. Do you understand?"

Again, they nodded.

"You have done nothing wrong, and I am certain that, were _Signorina_ Granger not ill, she would have enjoyed each and every bite. So I ask you not to worry, alright?"

Fina spoke for the both of them. "Si, _Signore_, we understand. It is sad for us to hear that the _Signorina_ Granger, she is ill. She is a most special person and dear to all of us, both in _Italia_ and other places."

Sirius smiled. "I am glad to hear it. Will you do me the favour of keeping her illness a secret? She does not wish it be known, at present."

Two small heads bobbed madly at this. "_Si_, _Si_, we keep her secret."

"_Grazie_. And now, I think, we should go and see the Signorina and discuss a certain arrangement."

Seeing their ears perk up at this, the two elves happily followed him into the house and into the living room, where Hermione sat, gazing longingly at the pile of parchment Enrico had brought.

"Don't even think about it, love- not before tomorrow."

Jumping as though she had been caught thieving, she smiled sheepishly at him. "I can't help it, Sirius, I can't just sit here all day doing nothing…."

He smiled, knowing her active mind would not tolerate an enforced period of emulating a vegetable.

"I know, love, and I'm sure we can find something to do, but first, I believe Ale and Fina had something that they wanted to ask you."

Stepping forward, Fina cleared her throat. "_Signore_ Black, he say that you like us to work for you, _Singorina_?

Smiling gently at the elves, Hermione nodded. "Yes. You see, due to my illness and a number of other issues, _Signore_ Black will be living here with me for the foreseeable future. I would be very happy if you would consent to cleaning my-_our_- apartment once a week, in addition to coming in once a day to prepare meals for us this week. Would you like to do this?"

Hermione took the two loud squeals from the elves as a yes. "Wonderful! In that case, perhaps you and Ale could prepare lunch and dinner for us and place it under a stasis charm? Oh, but I think dinner had better be for six rather than for two. You still have the list, don't you?" At the elves' nod, she beamed. "Oh, thank you both! You are so very good! Well, now, before you start cooking lunch, I think we need to talk business. How much do you charge for a day's work? Oh, and which day of the week would you prefer to come in to clean?"

Fina's jaw dropped, whilst Ale just shook his head in shock. "Pay? We could not accept the pay from you, _Signorina_ Granger! This would be a shame upon us both!"

Hermione frowned. "I don't understand, I was told the elves had full commercial and trading rights here in Italy…."

Ale waved his hand in dismissal. "_Si, Si_, we have the right to pay. But this is not matter! You are _Signorina _GRANGER!" At her blank look, he explained, "Every elf in Europe has sworn they help you at no cost if you need!"

Hermione sank back on the couch, shocked. "Wh-what? But _why?"_

Fina took over, looking at her with such pride and adoration that Hermione felt her cheeks heating. "Because you, _Signorina_ Granger, defend us. You fight for our English cousins, even when they so twisted by th-the _slave_ bond that they not WANT freedom. You fight for us even when your entire English society, they laugh at you, and nobody else want to help you. You at least bring back rightful bond of binding in England instead of slave bond, you allow elves to leave bad masters without being shamed because they break the oath! You do so much for us. For this, house elves say you are friend of our people and whatever you need, we do. So you see, _Signorina_ Granger, we cannot take money from you- it would shame Ale and Fina! We could not!"

Seeing that Hermione was shocked into silence, Sirius, who inwardly beaming with pride in his Mione, offered a compromise to try and please both the elves and Hermione.

"Then, Fina and Ale, perhaps you will allow _me_ to pay you for your work?" Seeing the elves begin to protest, he hurriedly explained. "You see, _Signorina_ Granger would like very much to pay you, and would not feel comfortable receiving services for which she is not paying. You know more than anyone else how hard she has fought for the elves to have the right to receive wages. Of course, I also understand that it would shame you to take money from her because of your oath. So I suggest that _I_ pay your wages; this way, _Signorina_ Granger will be at ease, and you will not have broken your oath. Perhaps, if you do not want the money, you could donate it to the elves who cannot find work? But at least if we do this, no one has to compromise their principles. Is this acceptable to you?"

The two elves looked at one another for a long moment, and Sirius was almost certain that they were communicating silently. Finally, they turned to Sirius and nodded.

"_Si,_ Signore Black, we can accept this if you insist."

"I do."

"Then we will accept 5 regine per week. But this week we accept nothing- it is a gift to you and the _Signorina_.

Glancing at Hermione, who nodded, Sirius then nodded his acceptance. Pleased, the elves popped to the kitchen and began to prepare the rest of the day's meals.

Hermione immediately turned to Sirius as soon as they were gone. "Sirius, it's very kind of you, but I couldn't possibly accept-" However, he cut her off mid-sentence.

"Love, you saw that they wouldn't take the money from you and if we had refused their services altogether, it would have shamed them. At least this way they will accept pay! Besides, you said that this is my home too, didn't you?"

She nodded.

"Then this is my contribution to _our_ home, alright love?"

Hermione smiled bashfully at him. "Well, when you put it like that, how can I refuse?"

Sirius slid onto the couch next to her and pulled her close. "You're not supposed to refuse, love- you're supposed to sigh and flutter your eyelashes and say, "Oh, Siri, you are SO kind and SO handsome and SO _strong, _I just can't refuse you anything!"

Hermione giggled. "Do you really think your ego needs more feeding, Siri?"

He growled playfully at her. "You, madam, should be grateful that your illness prevents you from being tickled. You deserve a damn good tickling for that sort of cheek!"

Hermione blinked innocently. "_Moi_?"

Sirius laughed. "_Oui, toi, ma petite_."

She pulled back and gazed at him in surprise, before remembering. "I'd completely forgotten that you speak French as well!" Then, her eyes lighting up, she blurted out, "Can we start our Italian lessons now?"

Sirius gazed at her thoughtfully. "I don't know, Mione, you still seem quite tired…."

"Oh please, Siri, even just for half an hour? Please? I'm not allowed to work until tomorrow as it is and I need SOMETHING to do and we didn't get to do Monday's lesson because of…everything..." She trailed off, remembering Monday night in shame.

Seeing the look on her face, he sighed. He couldn't refuse her anything it seemed. _Sap_, he scoffed at himself. "Alright, love, we'll start today. But we'll wait another half an hour for breakfast to settle and for you to regain a little more energy before we start, alright?"

Nodding, Hermione agreed.

The two sat quietly chatting for a time, before Sirius remembered something.

"_Accio packages!"_

Two shrunken packages came zooming into the room and landed in Sirius' hand. Resizing them, he cast several curse detection charms on them before handing them to Hermione, explaining, "George found these on your doorstep yesterday when he tried to get into your flat. He gave them to Moony when they met and Moony left them with me."

Looking at the parcels in some puzzlement, Hermione began to unwrap the first, unsure of what it could be and even more puzzlingly, who it could be from. Peeling the paper off, she found a small box and a note. _Note first_, she decided. Quickly reading the slip of parchment, a large smile spread across her face.

_Dear Hermione,_

_I hope this will reach you in time for your birthday. I saw it in a small shop in Stockholm which specialises in Nordic designs and thought you would like it, knowing as I do how fond you are of history. The pendant is an ancient Viking shield, which was reputed to keep away evil; it was later discovered that it was only successful in keeping away Nargles. I thought you would appreciate it because of its historical value (and its ability to repel Nargles, of course)._

_Happy twenty-first birthday Hermione._

_Love always,_

_Your friend Luna_

"Who is it from, sweetheart?" Sirius asked, seeing her smile.

"Luna," she grinned, handing him the note. She then opened the box, and found a delicate silver chain sporting a silver Viking shield pendant.

She looked up from the beautiful gift to see a look of utter bewilderment on Sirius' face.

"What the bloody hell is a Nargle?"

Hermione smiled fondly. "A creature which exists only in the Quibbler and in Luna's mind, I suspect."

"Er, I assume this is normal for her then?"

Hermione nodded. "Yes, for as long as I've known her, anyway. I….I think perhaps she believed in these things because her father did, and it gave her an outlet of sorts when she was at school. I'm sure you know she was somewhat of an outcast for some time?"

He nodded.

"Yes, well, I think that it gave her comfort to have something of her father there in the form of these creatures. Later on, I think it was a way of holding on to her father's memory after he was killed near the end of the war. That's why she continued the Quibbler and that's why she searches for these creatures; I don't think she expects to find anything and to be honest, I don't know whether, deep down, she really believes these creatures exist or not- she continues these hunts in memory of her father and all of the hunts they went on together."

Sirius nodded thoughtfully. "Makes sense, really. I suppose everyone reacts to loss differently, and Merlin knows, just about everybody lost someone in the war. It sounds as though she's trying to hold onto the past to hold on to the memory of her father."

Hermione nodded. "Yes, you're right. I think that sooner or later, the fact that her father is gone will come crashing down on her and she won't be able to escape it. I worry about her, truth be told."

Sirius sighed. "It's sad, love, but I suppose until something happens or she asks for help, there's nothing much you can do, save being there as a friend and correspondent. Who's the other one from?"

Opening the gift, Hermione saw a square box of medium size with a piece of parchment pinned on top. Removing the parchment, she began to read.

_Dear Hermione,_

_Happy 21__st__ birthday! I think we're all starting to get a bit long in the tooth, eh? I hope you've had or are having (depending on when this gets to you) a wonderful birthday. I hope you like this gift; I thought it was very appropriate when I saw it- it causes feelings of peace and contentment when placed in a magical home- feeds off the magic. _

_Happy birthday again!_

_ I'll write again soon._

_Your friend,_

_Neville Longbottom._

_P.S. You'll need to remove the stasis charms on the box before you can open it._

Handing the note to Sirius, she saw him skim it and then smile, before waving his wand over the box. The top sprang open and Hermione reached carefully inside to find a small pot containing an African Peace Lily.

She smiled at Neville's thoughtfulness as she showed the plant to Sirius.

"It's pretty, isn't it? I think it would look lovely on the small table in the corner there, and it's next to the balcony door so it will get lots of sunlight."

The raven-haired man smiled, happy to hear the pleasure in her voice. "Good idea love. Here, I'll move it now so we don't spill the thing!"

Having placed the plant, Sirius summoned his Italian textbook, some parchment and a quill, and sat back down next to Hermione.

"Alright love, if you're sure you're up to this, we'll start the lesson."

Seeing her nod, he handed the parchment and quill and opened the book.

"Like any Latin-based language, the place to start is the verb to be, that is, _essere_ …."

* * *

_Meanwhile, at the Lupin Home, London: 8:15am local time_

Harry took a deep breath and rang the doorbell, smoothing his black auror robes. A few moments later, the door opened to reveal an anxious Remus Lupin, dressed in his Ministry Robes. Evidently, he was planning to leave for work straight after the testing. Harry gave him a small smile, unsure of his reception here despite yesterday's words of forgiveness. Hell, Harry wasn't sure he'd ever manage to forgive himself for what he'd done. He had spent most of the night thinking back over the past ten years and he was shocked at his own callousness. How _could_ he have messed up so badly? And with _Hermione_, of all people?

And then there was Ginny. The woman he had thought himself in love with. The woman he was certain he would marry. Now, he did not know what to think. Had she really ever cared about him? Was the warm, loving girl he had fallen for nothing more than a construct of his own imagination? Now all he could do was cling to the last threads of hope that she had not gone so far as to potion him, that she had not betrayed him so completely.

He was shaken out of his thoughts by the sound of Remus' voice. "Good morning Harry, why don't you come in?"

Nodding, he followed the sandy-haired man down the hall to the living room, where he sat himself on an armchair, and looked down at the floor.

"Harry, please look at me."

Glancing up, he saw that Remus had a very solemn expression on his face. The werewolf took a deep breath before speaking again.

"Harry, I know you are feeling overwhelmed with everything that you have been told in the past twenty-four hours, and that you are dealing with issues of guilt and responsibility. However, I want you to understand that, whatever has happened, you are still a part of our family and you are always welcome here. Do you understand?"

Harry nodded, green eyes filling with tears for what seemed like the hundredth time in twenty-four hours. "Thanks Moony," he said quietly. "It means a lot to me."

Remus smiled gently at him, before leaning down and hugging the younger man.

"We all make mistakes, cub. We are proud that you are learning from your mistakes."

A loud commotion in the kitchen caused Remus to jolt upright, before grinning at Harry. Not two minutes later, a string of curses preceded a pink haired auror into the room.

"Bloody furniture. Remus, how am I supposed to avoid tripping over everything if you keep moving it around all the time?" Then, seeing Harry, she grinned. "Wotcher Harry! You look like crap."

Harry winced at her bluntness. "Hi Tonks, thanks for the compliment."

"What? I tell it like it is! And I'm telling you Harry, you look bloody awful. Didn't you sleep at all last night?"

Shaking his head, Harry flopped back onto his chair. "Nah, was a bit difficult to switch my mind off, what with everything…"

An awkward silence filled the room until Remus cleared his throat and offered Harry a cup of coffee, which Harry declined. He was far too nervous to worry about food and drink now- he wanted to get the testing over and done with. He needed to know, once and for all, just what the bloody hell was going on.

It seemed as though he would not have to wait very long, however, as the doorbell rang and Tonks ushered her mother into the room a moment later, then went to check on Teddy. Remus and Harry greeted the middle aged Healer, then sat back and waited. Harry was aware in some part of his mind that he was grateful to Tonks for giving him some privacy for the testing.

Andromeda did not mince words. "I assume you know why you are here, Mister Potter?"

He nodded.

"Very well. As we all seem to have work this morning, I think it best that we get right down to the matter at hand. With your permission, I will cast several diagnostic spells over you to determine whether there is anything which does not belong in your system."

At his nod, the Healer began to wave her wand over him in a set of complex motions, muttering incantations as his body tingled with magic. A few minutes later, she ceased her movements and stood, frowning in anger at what she saw, causing Harry's heart to sink. _She's found something_, he thought, letting go of the last hope he had that Ginny had not stooped to this level of deceit. _And Ron_, he thought painfully. Was Ron aware of whatever it was Ginny had done to him?

"What-" Harry swallowed and tried again. "What did you find, Mrs Tonks?"

The black-haired woman frowned even more severely at his question. "I've found a number of things, Mister Potter- three potion residues which I recognise, and one I am unfamiliar with."

Remus crossed the room and sat on the arm of Harry's chair, putting his hand firmly on Harry's shoulder. Harry was very glad of the support.

"Why don't we start with the three you recognise, Andromeda?" the werewolf suggested calmly.

Harry nodded, unable to speak so much as a word.

Smoothing her blue Healer robes, the middle-aged woman also nodded, hiding her anger behind professional efficiency. "Very well. The first is a notice potion, geared to attract the subject's attention to the brewer. I estimate it was administered regularly for a period of at least four years, and in increasing doses. The amount of residue in your system is alarmingly high. The second potion is a jealousy potion, also geared towards the brewer, which I estimate was administered to you for a period of six to nine months in high concentrations. The last is a loyalty potion, which makes the subject experience feelings of immense loyalty to the brewer. The amount of residue for this potion was also alarmingly high- I suspect that you were fed this potion regularly for a minimum of two years."

Harry sat stock still, unable to believe what he had heard. Ginny…Ginny had done all of that to him? _Why? _Did she truly love him so much that she stooped to _this_ to capture his attention? _But then, _Harry thought miserably, _if she truly loved me she NEVER WOULD have done this. This is not love- this is obsession. Just the actions of another fan of the Boy Who Lived._

He felt sick. He thought he had found a girl who would love him as he was, someone who knew Harry Potter and not the boy who lived. He thought that Ginny, having grown up with him to a certain extent, could see past the myth to the man behind. It seemed he was wrong and was now faced with the bitter truth of Ginny's actions. He had been nothing but a prize to her; a prize she was willing to go to any lengths to obtain. It also turned out that he did not know Ginny Weasley at all; the girl he loved could never have done this.

He managed to pay attention when Andromeda began speaking again and granted her permission to obtain a blood sample to identify the unknown potion. Vial in hand, she quickly did so.

Minutes later, he had his answer; a grim-faced Andromeda informed him that he had been dosed with a _docilem _potion.

"As you have probably deduced from the name, its purpose is to render the subject docile to the brewer. It is not the same as a compulsion- it does not force. Rather, it affects the behaviour more subtly- for example, you are likely to ignore things that could lead to an argument, however serious; you are likely to indulge the brewer's whims, and so forth. The effects can be overcome, of course, but it ordinarily takes either a tremendous amount of will-power and a knowledge that one has been potioned, or a tremendous shock to overcome the effects. Judging from the residue in your system, I should say that you have been fed this potion for at least two years, in high doses."

Sighing, the Healer continued. "Whilst none of these potions are lethal, they are illegal unless you have provided your express consent for their use. You have been very lucky, Mr Potter- the use of one mind-altering potion can often have unforeseen effects on a person's mind. The use of _four_ _together_, well I shudder to think of what could easily have happened to your mind. You are also fortunate that the potions did not poison you. That being said, I believe that it would do you good to consult a mind Healer for a time, as it will likely take considerable effort to work through the effects of the potions."

Harry sat unmoving in his chair. He was vaguely aware of Andromeda informing Remus that she would have the written reports ready by tomorrow, and of her taking her leave. He was also aware of Remus escorting his mother-in-law out, and his return to the living room. Yes, he was aware of his surroundings. But for the life of him, he didn't think he would be able to move- he was utterly shocked at what he had heard.

His mind was a swirling mess of confusion. He was uncertain as to which of his behaviours could be attributed to the various potions, and what he had done himself. What about his feelings? Were any of them his? Or was it _all_ him? He had no clue what was what. Only one thought was clear in his mind at this point: _What the bloody hell am I supposed to do now?_


	14. Chapter 14: To Do What is Right

**Disclaimer**: Needless to say, I do not own the Potterverse, only little my story.

_A/N: Hello all! Here is the next instalment of my little story, apologies it wasn't ready sooner, but unfortunately, i had a relapse. Thanks so much to everyone who sent well wishes by review and PM- meant so much to me! I hope you all enjoy the next chapter- as you can see, things are slowly starting to get moving now. If you want to know what happens ahead of time, or would a character explanation, please PM as I can't answer reviews._ _ As always, please read and review!_

* * *

Remus looked down at Harry as he sat frozen in place, his face pale with shock. Remus didn't blame him- he was shocked himself. Not that Ginny had resorted to dosing Harry with potions- truth be told, he had almost expected that after what she had to done to Hermione. No, he was shocked at the _number_ of potions she had used.

_Four mind altering potions together? Merlin, it's a wonder the boy managed to think at all!_ He growled to himself. Forcing himself to remain calm, he took a deep breath and glanced at Harry once more. Shaking his head at the disasters that seemed to be heaping themselves on the family lately, Remus sat on the arm of the young man's chair and laid a gentle hand on Harry's arm.

"Harry?"

Having received no response, he tried again, a little more forcefully.

"Harry? _Harry?_ Cub, are you alright?"

Wide green eyes blinked up at him, their expression dazed. Remus felt a clenching in his gut at the hurt on the young man's face. Blinking several times, Harry appeared to focus.

"What? Yeah, 'M fine. Sirius. Gotta tell Sirius. Said I'd call him after." He mumbled.

Remus nodded, trying to mask his worry and lend some much-needed calm to the situation. "Have you got your mirror?"

Sticking a hand in his pocket, the raven-haired young man pulled his mirror from the pocket of his robes and wordlessly held it out. Taking the mirror and walking to the other side of the room, Remus whispered 'Padfoot' and waited. Moments later, Sirius' anxious faced filled the surface.

"Pup?"

Remus shook his head. "No, it's me, Padfoot."

Sirius' anxiety increased. "What did Dromeda find?"

Sighing, Remus rubbed his face. "Quite a few things, but I think I ought to leave it to Harry to tell you the details. He was…surprised. He's not taking it too well." Glancing at the young man in question, who was once again staring into space, Remus shook his head before turning back to the mirror, speaking quietly so only Sirius could hear him.

"Pads, I don't think he ought to be on his own right now. He's barely said two words since he was told. Perhaps he should stay here for a few days- he can stay in the guest bedroom."

Considering this for a moment, Sirius shook his head and answered just as quietly. "No, Moony, I appreciate the offer, but I don't think that's a good idea. For one thing, it's too easy for the Weasleys to find him there, and its only a matter of time before _those two_ start to pepper you with owls or wait outside your house to get access to Harry. No, I think we'll have to find somewhere else." Pausing for a moment, Sirius considered and then added, "He won't be working for a few days either- he'll have to head in to the Auror Office and declare himself temporarily unfit. I…I think I should head over there."

Remus nodded slowly. "Alright Padfoot, it's up to you. Would you like Tonks to come over with Teddy and stay with Mione a bit whilst you're away?"

"Yes, if she wouldn't mind- it'd be a weight off my mind to know that Mione has someone there in case she needs something. I just need a few hours to help Harry work out what to do." Then, so quietly that only Remus' enhanced hearing could have heard it, he added, "This time, I will be there for my godson when he needs me. I won't fail him again."

The sandy-haired man exhaled heavily. "Padfoot," he said quietly, "You haven't failed him. You did the best you possibly could under the circumstances. I know you made a mistake many years ago, but so did we all! You haven't failed him."

Sirius said nothing.

Sighing, Remus gave in. "Alright Padfoot, I'll leave it to you."

His face tight, Sirius gave him a tense smile. "Thanks Moony." His face darkened. "I'll have to tell Mione. She'll want to know."

Suddenly feeling tension in his own face, Remus nodded. "I'm sure she will. I hope it doesn't upset her too much, though- she's suffered enough these past few days. I wish we could avoid telling her for the time being…."

Laughing mirthlessly, Sirius dispelled his illusions. "Moony, she's smarter than you and I put together. This was her idea in the first place! Somehow, I have no doubt that she already knows something is amiss. As for the other…." His face darkened. "She's already hurting and I have no doubt this will make it worse, but she'll still want to know." Shaking himself back into focus, he added, "Look, I have to go and tell her now, Moony. Can you put Harry on for me?"

Nodding, Remus walked back to the stunned young man and shook his shoulder. Blinking, Harry's green eyes appeared to focus on his surroundings once more.

"Sirius wants to talk to you, Harry."

Nodding, Harry took the proffered mirror. "Hi Sirius," he said quietly.

"Pup, are you alright?"

Nodding slowly, the young man exhaled. "Yeah…I think I'm just in shock at the moment. Moony told you?"

"Yes, he told me the gist of it. Look pup, I want you to floo Henderson and tell him you've been compromised with mind-altering potions and need to undergo a flushing regimen. I'll talk to Dromeda and get her to send in the reports today if possible. Now, as you'll be given the standard flushing period, I suggest you pack a bag and wait for me at Moony's, alright? Reckon you can get all that done in half an hour?"

Harry blinked in surprise. "Well, yeah, but I thought I'd head back to Glasgow and you'd visit me there for a bit or something."

"No, Harry, I want you to listen to me- it's not a good idea for you to be alone right now. Just get some things together and wait for me. Please?"

Sighing, Harry gave in. "Alright."

Nodding in satisfaction, Sirius bid his godson goodbye and his face disappeared. Silently, Harry slipped the mirror back into his pocket and looked up Remus, his expression blank.

Remus placed a gentle hand on Harry's shoulder. "Why don't you Floo Head Auror Henderson and get it out of the way? Then we can see about packing a few things for you."

Nodding wordlessly, the young man stood up and crossed to the fireplace. With a silent _incedio_, he tossed a handful of the green floo powder on the flames, called "Charles Henderson's Office, Ministry of Magic", and pushed his head into the fireplace. When the world had finished its rapid spinning and turning, he came face to face with a closed connection. Recognising his magical signature, the fireplace opened and he found himself looking into the somewhat Spartan office of Charles Henderson, the Head Auror. There was a sturdy, old wooden desk and a matching wooden chair behind it, a filing cabinet and a wooden guest chair on the threadbare grey carpet. The short, stocky auror sat writing behind his desk and looked up as he heard the Floo flare to life, his eyes sharpening as he saw who it was.

"Potter? What's going on?"

Harry knew that the man would be concerned because, although every member of the auror department had floo access to the Head Auror, only the Senior Aurors used it ordinarily. Junior aurors only used the direct connection in the case of an emergency, therefore, the man was understandably concerned.

"Sir, I….there's something I need to discuss with you. It's urgent and highly confidential."

The stern looking man scratched at his thick grey hair and nodded. "Right, best come through then. Not the kind of thing you want to discuss in an open Floo connection."

"Yes sir. I'll come through immediately."

Pulling his head from the fireplace, he turned to Remus and told him he would return shortly, then stepped into the fireplace and was sucked into a spinning vortex of colour and sound. A few moments later, he exited the fireplace in Henderson's office and casting a quick cleaning charm, he walked to the older man's desk and stood at attention.

"Sit down, Potter, and tell me what's going on."

Nodding, Harry sat at the chair across from the desk and took a deep breath to settle his thoughts. _Just tell him,_ he told himself. He knew that Henderson would believe him- and even if he didn't, he would still give him the time off to be on the safe side- even the suspicion of an auror being compromised was a serious thing. Henderson would never take a risk when it came to his aurors.

"Sir, I have just learned that my ability to perform my duties has been compromised, and has most likely been so since my school years due to a number of potions administered to me without my consent. As such, I respectfully request the standard flushing period to undergo a neutralisation and flushing regimen."

The older man's eyebrows rose almost to his hairline.

"Come again, Potter? Potions? What potions? And how in blazes are you only discovering this now?"

The younger man was uncertain how much how ought to disclose. Hesitating, he looked to his superior for reassurance.

"Sir, do I have your word that what I am about to tell you will not leave this office?"

Sitting back in his chair, Henderson looked hard at him for a moment.

"That's a big ask, Potter." He paused. "I'll agree provided it doesn't put me in direct conflict with the law or my duties as an Auror. That do?"

Nodding, Harry silently sighed in relief. "Yes sir, thank you sir. I realise it's a lot to ask, but….well….it's a somewhat delicate situation. Er, you see Sir, this morning a few friends of mine asked that I be tested for…for mind-altering potions. I was tested by Healer Andromeda Tonks of St Mungo's, and she informed me that my system contained traces of loyalty, jealousy and notice potions, in addition to another….Sir are you familiar with the _docilem_ potion?"

Henderson's ice blue eyes widened. "Good God Potter, don't tell me that you've been dosed with _that_ too? But why? How?"

Sighing, Harry rubbed his forehead in agitation. " They were all administered by the same person for differing periods of time and in different concentrations. I didn't notice because…well….I was always a little busy fighting for my life at school, what with one thing and another, and besides which, this person did it very subtly, so subtly I didn't even notice. Please," He started. "Please don't ask me who it is. I can't say anything at the moment until I've decided what I want to do about it. I can't do that with a clear mind until the potions have been flushed."

Henderson nodded slowly, his eyes wide. "You realise Potter, that you are extremely lucky that you didn't lose your mind with a cocktail of potions like that?" Shaking his head in disbelief, he pressed on. " Right, well I presume you have documentation to support your request?"

Harry nodded. "Yes sir, I'm told Healer Tonks will have it ready later today or tomorrow at the latest."

"Tell her to seal it and owl it directly to me. I'll handle this directly to minimise chances of discovery- last thing we need is the media getting wind of something like that. Very well- you are on flushing leave as of today. You'll report back to me in _five_ days with reports from Healers and Mind Healers proving your fitness to be back in the field."

_Five days?_ The standard was three! Harry gulped. Henderson was obviously worried. Nodding for what seemed the umpteenth time that morning, he nodded. "Yes sir."

Turning to leave, he began to make his way to the Floo.

"Potter."

Turning, Harry looked to the stern-faced man in front of him.

"When you get back I expect a full debrief on the matter, no details excluded. I will not allow you to be in the field without knowing if there are potential conflicts or weaknesses. Understood?"

Bowing his head in acquiescence, he said the only thing he could. "Yes sir."

* * *

_Hermione's Flat, Roma 9:50am: Local time_

Sirius ended the call and pushed the mirror back into his pocket, pondering all the while. Where could he send Harry? On the one hand, he really ought not to be alone after everything that had happened. On the other hand, who was there to stay with him? Tonks and Moony had to work, and they had Teddy to mind as well. He knew that he himself could not leave Hermione for more than a few hours for another few days at least- she was still very weak and could barely stand unaided, not to mention she was unable to use magic for the time-being. Then, there was the issue of food…he was the person Hermione relied on to help her, the person she was most comfortable with to share this burden. If he left her, her eating habits could very well worsen. No, in all, good conscience, he could not leave her. But what about Harry?

He squeezed his eyes shut as the familiar self-recriminations began, shuddering as he remembered just how badly he had failed the Potters, all of them. It was his most frequent nightmare, his most painful recollection during Azkaban. It was _his_ fault that James and Lily were dead because he had convinced them to change secret keepers. If he had not suggested the rat, then they would be alive today! And then instead of taking Harry and leaving that night, as he ought to have done, he had left the baby with Hagrid and gone after after the rat! It was _his_ fault that Harry had spent so many miserable years with the Dursleys, _his_ fault that Harry's parents had been killed. He had caused Harry to lose so much…..

_Not this time! _He thought fiercely. _This time, I will not fail my godson. I will support him and help him through this._ The only question was: _how_? How would he take care of both Hermione and Harry when he could not have them together in the same place? Perhaps, he mused, he could rent a flat for Harry close to this building- perhaps in the neighbouring one- and visit him daily until he was improved? Would that help? But what if Hermione saw it as a betrayal of her location? _There must be a way_, he thought desperately. _There must be!_

He was so caught up in his thoughts he almost didn't hear the voice calling him from the living room.

"Siri? Have you finished talking?"

Shaking his head at his own preoccupation, he walked back into the living room.

"Yes love, I've just finished speaking to Harry."

"And?" Her anxious look caused him to marvel at her kind heart and the very real concern she had for Harry, despite everything that had happened between them.

"'Dromeda found traces of four different potions in his system- I don't know which ones yet." He sighed.

"Four?" She breathed in shock. "Four potions? Oh Sirius….how…how is he taking it?"

Walking to the couch and slumping next to her, he rested his head atop hers for a moment and exhaled heavily, his left arm instinctively wrapping itself about her waist.

"I think he's too shocked to feel much of anything at the moment, but once that wears off…" He trailed off, not wanting to speculate on how Harry would likely react after the numbness dissipated.

"What is he going to do now? He needs to get away from there- they'll never give him a moment's peace. And he shouldn't be alone!"

Sirius smiled bitterly. "There's the crux of the problem, love. I've been wracking my brains trying to work it out. Harry needs to get away because the Weasleys will have no qualms in trying to get hold of him to plead their way out of the problem. Worse, Ginny Weasley is a very desperate and very dangerous young woman- who knows what she is capable of? No, he needs to get out of England until this potions matter is sorted out and the question of charges resolved, at the very least. Not to mention the press is likely to get wind of this matter, especially if the Weasleys find out where he is and camp out on his front lawn- don't think he needs that either. Better he stay out of their reach until the matter is resolved. And you're right, I don't think he should be alone right now. I can't imagine how hurt and wounded he feels. The problem is, I don't know who ought to stay with him! Moony and Tonks have Teddy, and they have to work. I don't know who else to ask…"

Hermione looked up at him. "Sirius, I understand if you need to stay with him- he is your godson after all, and he needs you desperately right now. I'll be alright here," she said quietly.

Sirius looked at her in shock. "Love, I'm not going to leave you. I thought we had established that already!"

"Yes, but he is your godson and he needs you…"

"And you are my l- my Mione and you need me even more! Love, a few days ago you were almost dying! You can't use magic, you can barely even stand on your own, and you think I'd leave you like that? " He looked horrified at the very thought.

Meanwhile, Sirius was berating himself over the near slip of the tongue. _Idiot! If you don't learn to control your tongue you'll bungle it all up and scare her away! You can't just go around telling her that you're in love with her like that!_

Thinking that she had offended Sirius, Hermione rushed to reassure him. "Oh Siri, I know you wouldn't abandon me. I just….I know you are worried and I don't want you to feel you have to leave Harry alone because of me. He needs you now."

Calming slightly, he drew her close in a warm embrace. "I know he does love, and I'll work something out. But you have to understand that I'm not going to just throw you over for someone else. I promised to stick by you and I will."

She gave him a weak smile and cast her eyes down once more, this time thinking rapidly. Sirius was obviously torn and yet he was not willing to leave her. He was willing to put her first no matter how much it complicated things for him. Inwardly, she sighed as she thought of what must be running through his mind at this moment. Hermione was one of the very few who knew Sirius' deepest fear- that he would fail his family again. She knew he was convinced that he had failed the Potters and blamed himself for their deaths, and Harry being raised by his despicable relatives. Most of his nightmares for the months she had stayed with him had centred on this self-imposed guilt. He blamed himself for failing them and he would not forgive himself for it. Therefore, now, he must be terrified of failing Harry again. He wanted to step in and care for the young man she knew he regarded as his own son, despite the lessened difference in their ages, and he would never forgive himself if he were not there for Harry during this difficult period.

On the other hand, she knew that he would never forgive himself if he left her on her own, or even with someone else, as she was now. She knew Sirius was no fool and would have discerned long ago that she trusted and esteemed him above anyone else in her life, and therefore that he could help her to overcome her own darkness and self-recriminations in a way that no one else could. He was determined to stick by her, no matter how difficult his situation as a result.

_But you can make it easier for him, if only you had the strength_, a small voice whispered in her mind. _You could overlook your own problems with Harry and ask him to stay here for a time. Then Sirius could look after you both and not feel that he has broken faith with either of you. The question is, are you wiling to make sacrifices for Sirius the same way he is for you? Do you have the strength to face Harry again, and all that entails, for Sirius? Do you love him enough?_

The last thought made her flinch. Of course she loved Sirius- he was the dearest friend she had, even more than that, perhaps, although she did not stop to question exactly what he was. She loved him with all her heart and she appreciated each and every sacrifice he made for her, and the way in which he thought nothing of taking her own burdens upon himself in order to give her ease. She owed him the same kind of loyalty and selflessness. Surely she could put her own feelings aside and allow Harry to stay for a few days, for Sirius' sake if not Harry's?

_Besides,_ she thought heavily,_ I couldn't just leave Harry like that- not now that I know he's been dosed and manipulated just badly as I have. I was a wreck when I discovered what had been happening, and I was so lucky as to have Sirius and Remus and Tonks supporting me and caring for me. God only knows what would have happens if I had been left alone to deal with it. I cannot subject Harry to that, no matter what has happened between us- I cannot and WILL NOT be that petty. _

It seemed her cause of action was clear. Stopping to gather her courage, she shifted slightly and turned to look at the tense man next to her.

"Siri?"

Shaking himself from his thoughts once more, he turned to look at he woman next to him.

"Yes, love?"

Twisting her hands nervously in her lap, she took a deep breath and spoke calmly. "I've thought of a very good place for Harry to stay for the time being."

He cocked his head questioningly. "Where?"

"Here."

Eyes wide with surprise, he stared at her stupidly for a moment. "Wh-what?"

She kept her gaze fixed on his and repeated firmly, "Here. I would like you to ask Harry to stay here."

Shaking his head in amazement, he exhaled heavily. "Love, that's very kind of you, but you don't need to-"

Interrupting him before he could get any further, she quickly overrode his objection.

"Yes I do! I should do this and I _need_ to do this." Drawing a deep breath, she ploughed on. "I don't imagine it will be easy for either of us, considering what has happened, but I cannot and will not leave him to suffer the shock of betrayal alone. You saw how I reacted and felt when I was told of what _she_ had done, and I was so fortunate as to have you here to comfort me. I cannot take that same comfort away from Harry now- not when I know what has been done to him. I will not condemn him to suffer the consequences of this-this _monstrous_ act alone! I am not so petty, Sirius. Do you think me so weak, so selfish that I would deny him refuge and the presence of his godfather for the sake of my own comfort?"

Sirius sat staring at her in shock and a little awe. Even tired and pale as she was, she was- _stunning_- her eyes were alight with passion and strength and her face was flushed, her chin tilted determinedly, her chestnut curls tumbling haphazardly down her back.

"Sweetheart….I don't know what to say…..Of course I don't think you are weak or selfish….I can't tell you how much I admire your strength and your kindness. Forgive me if I implied otherwise, I just….it's been so hard for you, and you've been so ill, I worried that having Harry here might make things difficult for you, that's why I didn't ask. I don't want you to do anything that would jeopardise your health, that's all."

He smiled crookedly and cupped her soft cheek in his hand. "I just worry about you, love."

She smiled brightly at him. "And that means more to me than I can say, Siri. But we need to do this, for all our sakes. Harry needs to do this so he can begin to heal and deal with what's happened to him. I need to do this, so I know that I have not abandoned someone I was very close when it could likely cause him harm." Her voice softened. "And you need to do this Siri, so you can stop accusing yourself of failing your godson when he needed you."

"What-how, I mean…how did you…."

She smiled gently at him. "It was the most frequent of your nightmares after…after the Veil. I don't think I could ever forget that."

Flushed with shame, he lowered his eyes. They had never spoken of his nightmares- he knew of course she had witnessed his nightmares for months on end, but he was ashamed nonetheless at his confirmation that she knew his private pain, his most secret shame. What must she think of him?

He suddenly felt her warm, soft fingers under his chin, gently forcing him to look at her again. Her brown eyes were warm, and sympathetic. Best of all, there was no sign of the pity or the anger he dreaded. He felt a warm glow begin to spread from his chest to the rest of his body at the expression in her beautiful eyes.

"Siri, please don't be embarrassed- not with me. I could never think any less of you. You…you must know how I feel about you. I respect and esteem you more than anyone I know, I _trust_ you more than anyone I know. I know you will stick by me and care for me, and I KNOW you will never abandon me." Her eyes burned into his as she added, "Just as Harry knows you will never abandon him."

His eyes grew dark, haunted with shadows. "I did once," he whispered hoarsely. "I did and I will never forgive myself."

"You made a mistake," she told him gently. "You were angry and hurt- Sirius, you had just learned that someone you had considered a brother had betrayed your brother and sister to their deaths! You went to their cottage and saw them, you saw their infant son crying for his parents and then Hagrid took him from you! I have no doubt that, had Hagrid not taken Harry, you would have cared for him and raised him as best you could. But Hagrid DID take him- on Dumbledore's orders- and you were lost. All you had was the knowledge of who had betrayed your family and a thirst for vengeance. _Anyone_ in your position would have done exactly what you did- I certainly would have! If I had been in your position, I would have tracked the bastard down and made him pay for _days_ before I finally killed him!"

Sirius was shocked at the fierce look in her eyes and her hard tone. He knew she was a formidable witch, the best there had been for many years, but now, seeing her like this, he could imagine exactly how she would be in battle. She was an amazon, a fierce warrior woman, and woe betide anyone who attempted to harm those she held dear!

She noticed his shock and gentled her tone. "Siri, you didn't fail him."

Sirius' throat felt as thought it had closed, he could barely speak. "Look at where he was raised, look what happened to him because I wasn't there. I-"

"Sirius, you were in prison for a crime you didn't commit! You were imprisoned without a trial, without anyone even asking you what had happened. You were locked in a living hell for twelve years! You didn't leave him with those-those _people_ to go on holiday!"

He nodded, his eyes glistening. "I know, but I still wasn't there when he needed me. All of those terrible things that happened at Hogwarts and I wasn't there. I should have been there to protect him."

Hermione's brown eyes burned until they were almost a golden brown. "But you _were_! Sirius, you escaped from Azkaban to protect him as soon as you discovered that the traitor was at Hogwarts! NO ONE had ever escaped from Azkaban! You immediately went to Surry to check on him, despite the fact that you were starved and exhausted! You went straight to Hogwarts and you risked capture and worse to try and kill the traitor! You caught Pettigrew and would have been set free had it not been for the full moon that night. Even on the run, you were there for Harry- you wrote to him, cared for him- Sirius, you lived in a cave and ate RATS to be near him! When you heard that he had gone to the Department of Mysteries, you didn't give a damn about being caught, you gave no thought to yourself- you went straight there and protected him! Do you think he would have lasted alone against Malfoy? YOU saved him! Y-you gave your LIFE for him, Sirius!" With tears in her eyes, she whispered, "You _died_ for him Sirius." Wiping her eyes, she continued. "You did more than James and Lily could ever have hoped for. YOU DID NOT FAIL HIM. Harry has long forgiven your one mistake from nineteen years ago, Remus forgave you for not telling him you had switched secret keepers and even though I have never met them, I am certain that James and Lily do not blame you for suggesting the switch! You must learn to forgive yourself, Siri."

Now blinking tears away in earnest, he shook his head in amazement at the woman sitting before him. Despite her own trouble, despite her own worries, she knew when the shadows of the past came to haunt him and she drove them out. Somehow, she knew when he was accusing himself for deeds long past and she valiantly defended him against himself. No wonder he loved her. She had sat with him for months, shielded him from nightmares and self-recriminations. She had nursed him and cared for him- she was his angel of mercy.

Sirius smiled at her, his grey eyes showing the comfort he felt at her words. Cupping her cheek, he tried to convey with his eyes just what he felt for her.

_I love you so much, Mione. I wish I could show you just how much, my love, _

"Thank you sweetheart. I…thank you for understanding. Thank you for always knowing what I need."

Her own eyes full of tears, she smiled at him and hesitantly put her arms about his neck and burrowed into him.

"It's my pleasure, Siri. After all, you always seem to know what I need. Why don't we make a deal? I'll look after you and you look after me."

His choked laugh was muffled by her hair. "I think that's a wonderful idea, love."

Reluctantly drawing away, Hermione raised an eyebrow. "Now, I take it there will be no more arguments about Harry staying in _our_ home?"

Chuckling, he shook his head. "No, love, there won't be."

"Good," she nodded decisively. "Now, we have a few things we have to do before you bring him. First, the guest room. I think we probably ought to clean it…are Ale and Fina still here? Perhaps they could help."

Seeing his nod, Hermione called for Fina, and sure enough, the little elf popped immediately into the room.

"_Si_, _Signorina_ Granger? You call Fina?"

Unable to resist smiling in the presence of the little elf, Hermione gently explained what they needed.

"_Si_, _si_, _Signorina_, Fina will clean and put fresh sheets and towels! Of course _Signorina_!"

With that, the happy little elf popped out of the room.

Her brow furrowed in thought, Hermione thought of what else would need to be done.

"Food isn't a problem, as Ale and Fina have made more than enough, and there is plenty in the cupboards and the fridge….I assume you told him to pack enough clothes and things for a few days?" Seeing his nod, she continued. "What else…..oh! The wards!" She looked up at Sirius, eyes wide. "He isn't keyed into the wards and I can't use magic! We need to change that so he can portkey in with you."

_Bloody hell_. Sirius had forgotten about the wards. Fat lot of good it would do to bring Harry all the way here and then have him bounce clear to Verona because the wards wouldn't allow him in!

Running a hand through his hair, he asked, "I assume you've taken over control of the wards fully and the Ministero no longer has the ability to alter them?"

Hermione nodded, chewing her lip. "Yes, I assumed full control of the focus the day I moved here. Worse, there is no ward stone to act as a focus here because it's only a leased apartment, otherwise we could have added your signature to the stone. The wards here have a _mental_ focus."

Suddenly, she looked up at him. "There is a way, that is….we could change the wards if I were to transfer the focus to you."

Sirius' eyes grew wide. "No! Mione, it will exhaust you and could endanger your health again, I can't let you do that."

Hermione understood his vehement reaction- in fact, if she were to be completely honest with herself, she was not particularly keen to undertake such an exhausting task at a time when she considered sitting upright a tiring effort. The act of transferring a mental ward focus was tiring in and of itself.

She would need to enter the meditative trance used for building Occlumency shields, and then picture the wards in her mind's eye. That would be easy enough- she was an excellent Occlumens and so could enter the trance with very little effort. The difficulty would come when she had to picture the ward focus and then imagine it slowly morphing into a particular object- any object would do. The sheer mental strength and discipline it would take to convert the ward focus would very likely exhaust her, and, in her current state, could render her unconscious. Sirius would then use Legilimency to enter her mind and she would give his mental avatar the object. The mental strength needed to maintain the changed ward focus and simultaneously lower her outer Occlumency shields to allow Sirius access would be beyond exhausting. Yes, she could understand Sirius' reluctance, but what else were they to do? In addition to which, it was unsafe to have the wards controlled by someone who could not use magic. If the wards needed changing or alteration, or if someone attempted to destroy them, she would be defenceless and unable to fend off the attack.

She tilted here chin determinedly. "Nonetheless, Sirius, we don't have much choice. Even if Harry were not coming, we would still need to transfer the focus, as its currently useless to me! If the wards were to come under attack, I could not repel the invading magical energy. If they were to need strengthening or changing, I could do nothing for at least another five days! It is not safe to leave the focus with me for the time being. The situation with Harry is a very good example of why you need to take control."

He looked at her. "It will be physically tiring, Mione, you could easily lose consciousness or worse. What if something were to happen?"

Touching his face gently, she smiled. "Then you would fetch Andromeda, who would berate you for a good hour about letting me get into such a state, and then rennervate me and tell me to take another week off work. There is no danger to my magical core, Siri,, as it will be very quick. It would take at least another two weeks of extreme physical exhaustion to affect my core- and I've eaten today."

Sirius hesitated. "I know, but there must be another way…."

Hermione shook her head, her curls bouncing madly. "There isn't. As I've said, it's a mental focus- no ward stone. So we need to change it mentally. The only other course of action is for me to change the wards myself and add Harry's signature. However, I could easily damage my core using such strong magic at the moment. Believe me, this is the safest option."

Much as he hated to admit it, he knew she was right. Merlin but he _hated _putting her in danger like this. Sirius sighed and nodded reluctantly. "Alright Mione. But please, if you suddenly feel you can't do it or you are too tired, come out of the trance immediately- please don't force yourself."

Hermione smiled reassuringly. "Of course. Don't worry Siri- it will be very quick and I'm sure I'll be fine."

With that, she closed her eyes and entered the trance. Finding herself in a calm blue sky, which she knew to be indicative of having entered the trance, she quickly imagined the wards and pictured the ward focus. Slowly, she began to convert the brightly coloured ball of energy into a large wrought iron key. Slowly but surely, the focus took shape, fighting her every step of the way. Her mental strength, however, did not waiver and the key remained as she carefully lowered her shields. In what seemed like no time at all, Sirius appeared before her mind's eye, smiling at her.

"All set?"

She smiled back and slowly held out the key, fighting to keep it in its form the whole time. "All set."

Taking the key, he winked at her and vanished from her mind. Willing the wards to vanish from her mind's eye, she took a deep breath and awoke.

As she slowly opened her eyes, the room spun about her, and she felt weak, barely able to keep her head upright. Swaying in her seat, she suddenly found Sirius' arm behind her shoulders.

"Gently there love, I've got you. Ale!"

With a loud 'POP', the elf was before them.

"_Si, Signore_ Black?" Then, seeing Hermione's pale face and apparent weakness, the elf's tennis ball eyes grew impossibly wider.

"_Signorina_ Granger! You are ill! I bring _Signora la Dottoressa_!"

"No, Ale, I am well!" Hermione said, trying to smile despite the spinning of the room. "I am just a little dizzy."

"Ale," Sirius intervened, not taking his eyes from Hermione's pale face, "Could you please bring some juice and chocolate for _Signorina_ Granger? I believe she needs the sugar to give her energy."

"_Immediatmente, Signore_." The worried little elf popped out of the room.

Gently pulling her toward him, Sirius carefully laid Hermione's head on his shoulder, one arm firmly wrapped about her waist, the other gently clasping her hand.

"I'm so sorry love, I should never have let you do that in the first place. I knew it would exhaust you and-"

"Siri," Hermione said tiredly, lifting her head and looking into his worried face. "I knew it would tire me- this is not the first time I have had to pass a ward focus, you know. I chose to do it. I am alright- just a little tired, Please don't berate yourself because it had to be done. Just think what could happen if we hadn't done it and we had to increase the change or add to the wards later- what would we have done? I cannot use magic for several days yet and we have to be practical- the ward focus is useless to me until then. To be honest, we should have thought of this before, although I suppose we could not have done it any earlier."

His expression relaxed slightly, but he still looked guilty. "I know love, but….I can't help it. I worry about you. I love you Mione, you know that."

_I love you so very much, my Mione. So very, very much._ He thought.

She smiled at him, and even spent as she was, it was still a beautiful smile to behold. "And I love you Siri. Please, don't worry, I'm alright."

Suddenly, Ale returned bearing a tray with two glasses of orange juice and two bars of chocolate. He placed the tray on the table next to the couch and bowed.

"_Il_ _Succo d'aranccita con zuccero, Signore, et il cioccolato._"

Sirius smiled at the troubled little elf- evidently he was so worried that he did not notice that he had slipped back in Italian.

"_Mille grazie, _Ale_." _Sirius smiled gently at the elf, taking a glass and passing it to Hermione who began to sip it slowly. However, he noticed that she did not touch the chocolate, and was in fact casting suspicious looks at the bar.

Inwardly, he sighed. He knew that the idea of eating chocolate was difficult for her to countenance, and ordinarily he would not have pushed her to eat it quite so soon, but after the draining exercise she had undergone, there was really no choice- she needed the sugar, and quickly.

"Come on love," he said quietly, taking the bar in hand and unwrapping it. "Just a few small bites."

She looked anxiously up at him, seeming both anxious and embarrassed.

"I-Siri, I don't know if I can..." she trailed off, looking even more embarrassed.

"Shhhh, sweetheart it's alright- you don't need to feel embarrassed with me," he grinned crookedly, using her own words against her. " Remember the deal- I'll look after you and you look after me."

She smiled back shamefacedly. "I know, it's just so silly... I mean, I'm afraid of a chocolate bar! Whatever would Remus say?"

Grinning at the thought, Sirius held out the bar. "He'd have a heart attack and then eat the chocolate."

Slowly, Hermione took it and stared at it.

"Come on love, you can do it. I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere. Just a few small bites..."

Seeing the guilt spreading across her pale face, he quickly intervened. "You are NOT fat, love. You are beautiful and you deserve to eat this chocolate- don't listen to anyone or anything that suggests otherwise."

Hesitantly, she raised the chocolate to her lips and took a small nibble, chewed then slowly swallowed, looking immensely guilty. In an obvious effort to distract herself, Hermione asked him, " when are you going to get Harry?"

Smiling at her encouragingly, he took a drink of his own juice. "After you've had a few more bites", he said.

Hermione swallowed and slowly nodded, wondering how she would react to having Harry in the same house after resolving never to speak to him again. She smiled wryly to herself- evidently, that was no longer an option.

_Well one thing is for certain,_ she thought to herself. _It's going to be a very interesting day..._

* * *

_Lupin residence, London: 9.30am Local Time_

Harry sat comfortably in an armchair in the Lupins' living room, Teddy settled comfortably in his lap, sporting black hair and green eyes like his godfather, or, as Teddy called him, "Unca Hawwy".

The young man drew comfort from the small boy in his arms, whose liveliness and childish innocence were a soothing balm to his troubled mind and kept the frightening and depressing thoughts of what had happened that morning at bay. He knew the bleakness and anger would return, but for now, he would enjoy this brief moment of respite.

Drawing his arms slightly more tightly about his godson, Harry was thankful that the small boy had so quickly forgiven him for his prolonged and inexcusable absence from his life lately. His small, high-pitched "it OK, Unca Hawwy" to Harry's heartfelt apology had made him feel even worse- he didn't deserve to be forgiven so easily.

Tonks clattered nosily into the room at that moment, disrupting his self-pitying train of thought. She was staying home with Teddy during the day whilst Remus was at work, and would go to work later that evening when her husband had returned. Remus had left shortly after Harry had returned from Henderson's office. Harry had bid him goodbye and returned to collect a few essentials, which now sat in a duffle bag at his feet as he waited for Sirius to arrive. He wondered where Sirius intended to take him, and whom he would be staying with, seeing that Sirius did not want him staying on his own. If he were to be perfectly honest with himself, he really wanted to stay with Sirius for a while, at least until this mess was sorted out. Odd as it seemed considering the diminished age gap between them, Sirius was the closest thing he had to a father and right now, he really needed his comfort and presence.

His thoughts were interrupted by Sirius' sudden and silent appearance in the room. The handsome animagus' eyes fell immediately on Harry as he crossed to his godson's side. Harry stood and gently placed Teddy on the chair behind him, whereupon his godfather drew him immediately into a warm hug.

"Alright, pup?" he asked, pulling back and looking at Harry's tense face.

"Alright Sirius," he replied, successfully giving him a smile, albeit a somewhat strained one.

Sirius looked closely at him and knew his godson was far from alright, but didn't want to push him. He nodded, showing the younger man that he would not push him to talk until he was ready. Harry understood and his expressive green eyes conveyed his relief behind his glasses.

"Wotcher, Sirius. Everything go well this morning?"

Sirius turned to his cousin and narrowed his eyes at her too-innocent smile. He had not forgotten the anti-summoning charm she had left on Hermione's lingerie drawer.

"Yes," he said. "But don't think you'll get away with that stunt you pulled- we'll talk later.

Tonks expression grew even more innocent, whilst Harry looked between them in confusion.

" Why, Sirius, I have no idea what you're talking about," she replied sweetly, irritating him even further.

"We'll see about that," he growled. "As I said, we'll talk later.

"Of course, cousin," she simpered sweetly, batting her eyelashes at him.

Harry looked at her as though she had lost her mind, then shook his head and turned to his godfather.

"Er, Padfoot….I'm…er, ready to go when you are."

"Good, we'll get going now then. Have you packed all you need?" his godfather replied, not taking his eyes off a now giggling Tonks, who looked as though butter wouldn't melt in her mouth.

"Yeah, got it all," he said, picking up the bag at his feet and wondering what on earth the two of them were on about. It sounded as though Tonks had played a prank of some kind on Sirius, although what prank could possibly cause his godfather to react like that? Ordinarily, Sirius was the first to laugh at a prank.

Shaking his head, he saw Sirius to stop scowling at Tonks long enough pull out what looked like a Chinese dagger from his pocket. Obviously, they were travelling by portkey.

Tonks, on seeing the dagger, raised her eyebrows in disbelief. Sirius merely shook his head at her and said, "Later."

Nodding her head slowly, but still looking somewhat disbelieving, she quickly embraced Harry and stepped back.

As Harry placed his finger on the dagger hilt and closed his eyes, Sirius mumbled something under his breath, and Harry waited for the tell-tale jerk behind his navel.

Nothing happened.

_It didn't work_, he thought disappointedly. The portkey must have failed.

"Open your eyes, Harry," He heard.

He opened his eyes- and stared. He was not, as he had thought, still in the Lupins' living room. He was, instead, in the atrium of what seemed to be a luxurious apartment in a noticeably warmer climate. _Definitely not in London then_, he thought to himself. Turning to get a better look at his surroundings, he was stunned by the view from the large glass balcony in front of him.

"That- that…looks like….are we in-"

"Rome?" Sirius finished as he quickly cast _mufflatio_. "Yes, we are."

Harry stared dumbly at him. "Wh-where are we, exactly? Is this your flat?"

Sirius sighed and shook his head.

Harry frowned. "Then…whose-?"

Sirius pointed behind him.

Harry turned and saw a photograph of a smiling couple. On closer inspection, he thought they looked very familiar. Oddly enough, it was a _muggle_ photograph…..he suddenly froze. "They…they're Hermione's parents!"

Sirius nodded wordlessly.

Harry's eyes grew wide. "Is-is this where she lives? Is this her flat? Is she here?" he babbled, looking around wildly.

"Yes, Harry," Sirius replied quietly. "This is where Hermione lives now and yes, this is her flat. You'll be staying in one of the guest rooms for the next few days."

"But, but….I thought she never wanted to see me again," the younger man whispered. "How can I stay here?"

Sirius sighed. "It was her idea, Harry. When I told her that the potions scans had come back positive she insisted that you stay here."

"But WHY?'

Smiling slightly, Sirius told him, "Because she knew you'd need me nearby. Since I couldn't leave her here alone, and she didn't want you to be alone after everything, she suggested you come here, for both our sakes."

Harry swallowed. "Will…will she talk to me?"

"Of course she will. She does care for you, you know, despite everything. But Harry," and here, Sirius' countenance grew stern, "There is something I must ask of you. Firstly, do not press her to talk about anything she does not wish to; if she says to drop a subject, you drop it- the additional strain could make her very ill. Secondly and most importantly, do NOT comment on her eating habits or her reactions to food under any circumstances, do you understand?"

Harry nodded in bafflement. "Yeah…but…what…"

Sirius interrupted him. "You know what I told you yesterday about the potion she was given- this is an effect of that potion. I cannot tell you anymore without violating her confidence. If she wants you to know more, she will tell you. Do I have your word on this, Harry? You won't press her?"

"Of course." Harry shook his head slightly. "I can't believe this is happening - it's like a nightmare, Sirius. The kind you don't wake up from."

Seeing that Harry was beginning to unravel slightly, Sirius quickly took his bag and placing a hand on Harry's shoulder, pulled him through the corridor and into the second guestroom. Harry looked around the lovely, large room in wonder. _This is a bloody nice place_, he thought. _And is that an ensuite I see? _

"This will be your room, pup, mine is right next door, and Mione's is on the other side of mine. Each room has its own ensuite, and believe me, they're _very_ spacious. You should find fresh towels in the bathroom, I believe."

Harry nodded, still unable to believe this was happening, that he was _here_.

"Why don't you take some time to unpack and look around the room? You have a balcony as well, if you'd like to go outside. I'll go and tell Mione you're here in the meantime and nip back in when its time for you to say hello. OK?"

"Right," Harry nodded, trying to focus on his unpacking rather than the blind panic that suddenly seemed to be trying to over take him.

Sirius gave him a quick smile and strolled out of the room, closing the door quietly behind him.

Unzipping his bag, he decided to unpack the muggle way after he had resized everything and hung his clothes in the large closet he found, placing his t-shirts and underwear in the large chest of drawers . His few toiletries he placed in the bathroom and his leather dossier on the mahogany desk in the corner, which, he noticed happily, had a very large, comfortable leather chair in front of it. He also placed the Potter Histories on the desk.

Seeing that he had nothing left to unpack, he folded the bag and placed it into the closet, then, after a moment's thought, extracted a pair of jeans and a polo shirt- he didn't plan to spend the day lounging about in his auror robes and the black shirt and pants he wore under it. After changing, he wondered over to the balcony and drew back the curtain.

_The weather is so different over here, _he thought to himself, comparing the balmy, sunny weather to the slightly chilly English autumn he was familiar with- it certainly didn't hurt that he was going to do his recuperating and thinking in such pleasant surroundings. Just as he was reaching for the handle, a knock sounded on his bedroom door.

"Come in!" He called, turning back to the door.

The door opened to admit his godfather, a small smile on his face.

"Settled in OK pup?"

Seeing Harry's nod, he continued. "Right, well then I think we need to have a talk. Before that though…I think it's time you said hello to Mione."

Harry was suddenly terrified. What if she didn't want to see him? What if she took one look at him and kicked him out? What if she hated him now?

Trying to clear his mind, reminding himself that she had invited him here, Harry took a shuddering deep breath and shakily exhaled. "Right. Let's go."

Sirius took the lead and strode into the hallway and then veered right into a the living room, which seemed to be furnished with the furniture from Hermione's flat in England.

There, seated on the leather sofa, sat Hermione reading a book. She looked up as she saw them entering. But this was a very different Hermione to the pretty, healthy, vivacious woman that he knew. _This_ Hermione had pale, exhausted features- she looked thinner too, he noted. Worst of all was her eyes; they bore a pain, a deep sadness that cut him to the quick. Had he done that? Was this what he had done to the woman who had stood by him since they were children?

_You bastard_, he berated himself. _You selfish, blind, cowardly bastard_.

He noticed that her eyes lit up as she saw Sirius approach.

"Someone here to see you, love" he said, his face softened by a smile as he dropped a kiss on the top of her head. She looked up at him questioningly and he nodded; Harry marvelled at the level of understanding between them that they could communicate silently. He saw Sirius motion him to come over, and, swallowing, he slowly entered the room as Hermione slowly turned her eyes toward him.

"Hello, Harry," she said quietly.

Her gaze flickered to Sirius, almost as if she was seeking reassurance. He immediately sat on the arm of the couch, slipping an arm naturally about her shoulders. Harry found that his throat was suddenly dry.

"H-Hermione," he croaked. What should he say? he wondered. 'How are you' seemed insensitive and stupid- he could see for himself exactly how she was.

"I-I heard you were ill," he said instead. "I hope you are feeling better."

She looked back at him solemnly. "Yes, thank you, I am feeling much better."

Taking a deep breath, he told her, "Sirius told me that it was your idea to invite me to stay here for a little while."

She nodded. "Yes, I think it would be best. I know how you are feeling now, and I know you will need Sirius' support and his presence over the next few days. Since he has stubbornly refused to budge from my side, I decided that this was the best means of ensuring everyone got what they needed."

"Thank you," he managed to croak. "I….I know that it's not easy for you considering the…circumstances, but I appreciate this nonetheless."

She sighed, rubbing her forehead tiredly. "It will not be _easy_, I admit, to speak of certain things with you, it will not be easy to be reminded of what has happened, but, as Dumbledore used to say, we have to choose between what is right and what is easy. And this, Harry, is _right_, however difficult it is."

Heart beating madly, Harry felt as though his stomach were hollow. He did not deserve her kindness, he knew that. And yet she was willing to endure his presence and all of the emotional turmoil it would undoubtedly cause for his sake- and for Sirius' sake. Suddenly, he had to tell her, he had to tell her how sorry he was, how much he missed her, how much he needed her in his life.

"Hermione…I-I I'm so sorry….for, Merlin, for all of it…I…know you can't trust me the same way as you used to, but I…."He stuttered, unable to form even the most basic of words without several attempts.

She interrupted him. "I know that we will have to talk about this at some point Harry- we cannot avoid it now that we are living in the same house. But now is not the time. I'm too exhausted, for one thing, and for another, I think perhaps you and Sirius need to talk- alone. You both need that."

Tilting her head, she smiled tiredly at Sirius. "You know, I don't think I've left his apartment in the last two days, and the sun looks rather nice and warm. I don't suppose…?"

Sirius smiled back at her, his eyes soft. Harry blinked. Even distraught and tired as he was, there was something about that look…he couldn't quite put his finger on it, but there was something about it….

"Of course, love. Did you want a book to read as well?" Seeing her nod and pick up the book she was reading when he came in, he stood up and walked to stand in front of her.

"Come, my lady, your carriage awaits," he grinned, to Harry's amazement he picked up Hermione and walked out of the room with her, calling to Harry, "Can you follow me and open the door, pup?"

Following them quickly through the hallway, he found himself in the atrium once more, in front of the large balcony he had admired on arrival. Quickly waving his wand at the door, it opened and Sirius stepped out and carefully placed Hermione into a chair sat in front of a table. Then, seeming to change his mind, Sirius transfigured another chair into a large, comfortable chaise longue and then carefully transferred Hermione to that, before summoning her sunglasses.

"All right, love?"

Smiling she nodded as she slipped the sunglasses on and opened her book. "I'll be fine Siri, take as long as you need."

He nodded. "Thanks love. I'll cast an amplification charm and leave the door open, so sing out if you need anything, OK?"

"OK," she smiled.

With that, she turned to her book and began to read.

Chuckling at the none too subtle dismissal, Sirius cast the amplification charm and a sunscreen charm on her, then turned and lead Harry indoors and back to the living room, where he plonked down on the couch. Harry sat next to him, staring at his feet for a while, before suddenly looking up.

"Padfoot? Why did you carry Hermione? And why didn't she cast her own charms?"

Sirius sighed, the smile vanishing from his face. "I carried her because she's too physically weak to stand, let alone walk, at the moment." Harry's eyes grew wide at this information, but Sirius continued.

"It's been like that since she woke up yesterday. She's improving, she was much worse yesterday…but I doubt she'll be able to walk on her own until tomorrow or the day after. As for the charm…she's not allowed to use magic for the next week- it could drain her core and either burn her out or kill her through exhaustion. Anymore than that, however, I can't say- it'll have to come from her."

Harry nodded slowly, trying to assimilate the new information. He was beginning to see just why Sirius and the others had been so furious yesterday with Ginny, Ron and himself. If this was Hermione improved….sweet Merlin, what had happened to her? He remembered the furore that had been raised when the _humilitas_ potion had been mentioned. How could Ron and Ginny have done that to Hermione?

_But then,_ he thought bitterly, _how could Ginny have dosed YOU like that? You thought she loved you. _

Seeing that his godson was beginning to fall into a deep introspection, Sirius decided to intervene.

"Pup, do you want to tell me exactly what happened today?"

Harry jumped at the sound of his godfather's voice, having almost forgotten that he was not alone in the room. Fixing his green gaze no his godfather's face, he took a deep breath and gave him the blunt facts, trying to control the feelings of betrayal and rage that arose at the thought of the subject he had been trying to avoid.

"Mrs Tonks found four potions in my system this morning." Seeing Sirius' encouraging nod, he continued.

"She found jealousy, loyalty and notice potions in my system, all administered in varying doses and time frames, however, she was able to deduce that it occurred whilst I was at school."

"And the fourth potion, pup?" Sirius asked softly, slipping his arm about his godson's shoulders.

Harry's gaze faltered and he looked down at the couch, seemingly fascinated by the veins and creases in the leather. Even _talking_ about Andromeda's findings was enough to send his feelings in a tailspin- he had tried so hard to force the matter fro his mind for the past hour and now that he _had _to face it, he was slowly losing his grip on his control. He was tempted to bury his face in his godfather's shoulder and weep like a child. _Get a grip, Potter,_ he told himself. _Face it like a man and just tell him._ Taking a deep breath, he continued.

"She….had trouble determining what it was, you see…"

Sirius knew that meant it was a very complex and rare potion as Andromeda could detect potions with the best of them He squeezed Harry's shoulder in an effort to get him to continue, despite the fact that he _really_ didn't like where this was going.

"She ran a test on my blood, found out what it was….I'd never heard of the stuff before today…."

Unable to help himself, Sirius took his godson's chin in his hand and slowly tilted it up.

"What was it, pup?"

Visibly steeling himself, Harry mumbled, "_Docilem_,"_, _then flinched as he saw Sirius' grey eyes slowly heat until they resembled molten steel.

"I see," his godfather said quietly, dropping his hand, his other arm once more about Harry's shoulders.

Chancing a glance at his godfather's face, he winced. Sirius' expression was almost completely blank- there was no emotion on his face whatsoever. The only indication as to his seething emotions was the fury in his eyes. Not for the first time, Harry understood why people feared Sirius Black- there was a tightly controlled, latent power that became obvious in his rage; only a fool would cross this man.

After a few minutes of silence, Sirius spoke, evidently having gotten himself under control.

"What are you thinking now, pup?"

Tilting his head back until it lay on the back of the couch, Harry pondered the question, his thoughts swirling madly.

"Honestly Sirius, I don't know. I don't know _what _to think. Every time I try and work through it, my blood begins to boil and I feel like there's a hole in my chest."

Sighing, Sirius rubbed his forehead. "I can imagine. Just tell me as best you can what's running through your head right now- I guarantee it'll make you feel better to get it out."

Still staring at the ceiling, Harry pondered the question. "I dunno, I guess I feel like I've been betrayed- and that hurts. I feel confused as well. I mean, Ginny's been spiking my juice or whatever for years now! She's been playing with my emotions and my mind, she…she _lied _to me in a way. I mean doing what she did- it's the same as lying. It's dishonest. I feel betrayed because I trusted her more than most, I…I was going to _marr_y her, but now I find she's been playing with my mind and my heart….how could she do that to me? Did I mean so little to her?"

Now that he had begun to voice his feelings, it all seemed to come pouring out.

"I don't even know if I have real feelings for her or if it was all just the potions. Or even if it began with the potions and then I actually fell in love with her as time went on- I just don't know. I feel betrayed because the person I thought I was getting to know didn't exist at all. I mean, the woman I fell in love with, she could never have done any of this Sirius- she dosed me, she dosed Hermione….the Ginny I knew was a good person, an honest person. And in the space of a day I find out that the person I loved all these years was nothing more than an act! That Ginny Weasley is actually a manipulative, dishonest schemer who didn't give a damn about anyone else's feelings but her own! That she potioned my best friend just because she began to develop feelings for me, and then she began to potion me! H-how am I supposed to take that, exactly? I…I don't know what's real and what's not anymore! Everything is upside down."

Closing his eyes, Harry swallowed, desperate not to cry in front of his godfather like a little boy.

"The worst part is, I don't know even why she did it. Does she just want the Potter money and title? Is that all she wants? Did she have real feelings for me? Did she even _know_ me? Was it just another fan girl obsession? I just…._why?_ Why does someone do something like this?"

Seeing that his godson had fallen silent for the time being, Sirius swallowed his anger and his hurt at the devastation in his godson's voice and forced himself to speak calmly.

"I know it hurts, pup, and it's natural to wonder why, but believe me, it won't lesson the pain. At the end of the day, you still have to deal with the fact that she _did_ do that. It takes time but it will get better, trust me on that."

Harry shook his head disbelievingly. "I thought she cared about me, I…I thought she loved Harry, just plain Harry, not…the other stuff. But she can't have, can she? I mean, if she really loved me, she would never have done what she did- and she would never have lied to me like that….and you know the worst part? I feel stupid. Stupid for falling for her, stupid for loving her and thinking she loved me to too when the entire time she was playing me like a puppet- I feel like a right bloody git."

Barking a bitter laugh, Sirius shook his head. "Believe me pup, I know _exactly_ how you feel."

Harry lifted his head and stared at him. "_You_?

The raven-haired animagus cocked an eyebrow. "_Me_. Is that so hard to believe?"

"I…I don't understand. Did something happen with Lira?"

Sirius barked another bitter laugh. "That would be the understatement of the century."

"What happened, Padfoot? I thought you two were really in love…."

Sighing, Sirius shook his head. "We weren't in love, Harry. It wasn't what your mum had with your dad or Moony has with Tonks. Lira and I….we got along well. We enjoyed each other's company, we were attracted to each other…..I thought we could grow to love each other one day and build a family. Needless to say, that ship has sailed."

"But why? What happened?"

Thinking it might help his godson take his mind off his own circumstances for a time, Sirius told him about the entire debacle with Lira. Harry was dumbfounded.

"W-what? She was experimenting on muggle-borns?! How have they gotten away with this for so long? And she was engaged….Oh Padfoot, I'm so sorry. I….I know how much you wanted a family."

Smiling wryly, Sirius hugged his godson. "I have a family, Harry. I have you, I have Moony and Tonks, I have Mione….I don't deny I'd love the chance to marry that certain someone who loved me for me and whom I loved to distraction but…" Sirius stared into the distance, his gaze unfocused for a moment before coming back to himself. "That will come in good time. And so it will for you pup. When the time is right, you'll know. It might come as the biggest bloody shock you can imagine, but you'll know."

Harry was silent for a moment, torn between surprise at the depth of emotion evident in Sirius' words and sadness at the betrayal he had faced.

"I thought I did know….I thought I had that with Ginny…." He said quietly. "Now I don't even know if what I felt was real or just the result of a bunch of potions. On top of that, I find that the girl I loved didn't exist to begin with. I….I don't know if I can go through that again."

Sirius smiled grimly. "I know Harry, but it will take some time. You don't have to solve everything today, pup. It will take time and thought and talk but you will heal."

Harry fell silent again. Seeing that there was something he wanted to say, Sirius nudged him.

"You can talk to me about anything Harry….what else is on your mind?"

Shifting slightly, Harry turned and looked Sirius full in the face. "How do I know if what I did to Hermione was me or the potions? I don't even know if what I've done is the result of my own selfishness or because I was being manipulated by several different potions. How will I know the difference? And….and how will Hermione know the difference? Will she even care? I hate this because it's given me hope that if she knows it was the potions and not me, she might forgive me and let me try to become her friend again." His green eyes were full of pain and hope.

"I've lost the woman I thought I was going to marry, the woman I loved. I may well have lost the first friend I ever had after what I heard yesterday. I…I don't want to lose Mione too. I know I don't deserve her friendship and I know neglected her, but please, Padfoot, don't let me lose her too! Help me get her back, please!"

Sirius wordlessly drew the worried young man into a hug and held him for a while. After he let him go, he merely looked at him, unsure of what he ought to say. On the one hand, he had promised Hermione he would not interfere with her decision to leave Harry and the others behind. On the other hand, he hated the pain and fear of being alone that he saw in Harry's eyes.

Taking a deep breath, he followed his conscience. "Harry, I know you are feeling alone and shaken right now, and that your world has been turned upside down. But I think you know that I can't fix this for you- this is something that you and Mione will have to work out between you. All I can tell you is that she has the biggest and most loving heart of anyone I know, and if there were any mitigating circumstances for your actions, she's not the type to ignore them just to hold onto a grudge. You'll talk to her and sort it out between you, it's not my place. All I ask is that you remember she is very ill, and we need to keep her stress and exhaustion levels low. Please, be careful with her. Please…."

Harry gazed at his godfather a moment, then bowed his head.

"You're right. I know you're right Padfoot, it's just hard with everything up in the air at the moment, you know?"

Sirius nodded, smiling slightly. "Yeah, believe me, I know. Look, today has been a tough day for you. Why don't I take you on a tour of the flat and introduce to Fina and Ale if they're still around? If you want to explore, the Borghese Gardens are a really nice spot. I was hoping to take Mione there tomorrow if she's well enough to step outside little while, maybe have a small picnic, maybe you could come with us….

Sirius continued to fill Harry in on some of the local attractions as they stood up and made their way slowly down the hall.

* * *

_A broom closet, St Mungo's Hospital, London: 4:30pm local time_

"Found anything love?"

An irate female voice snapped, "No, I haven't, and don't call me love."

"No need to get snappy Jones. Just trying to be friendly."

Andrea Jones snorted. "How about you stop wasting time trying to be friendly and get on with your job before they notice the records are missing from the archives, Kenley."

Benjamin Kenley sighed. "I've _been_ looking and I haven't found anything else- these ones are all clean. I'm just taking a little break... Besides, what are you worried about? Anyone goes near the archives, Venton will send us a patronus, plus we have wards set up. Anyone trips 'em, we'll know."

Andrea sighed and continued scanning the piles of medical records in front of her for magical residue. "That's beside the point- there's no need to be taking risks where we don't need to. The sooner we scan this pile, the sooner we'll have them back before anyone can miss them. We've already gone through four months worth, we just have a little more to go. The boss wants all six months worth by tonight, remember?"

Shaking his head, Kenley slumped against the wall of their locked and silenced broom cupboard. "Not bloody likely I'll forget, the way Malfoy's carrying on. You'd think he was searching for buried treasure with the hours he has us keeping."

Andrea turned her head and fixed her hazel eyes on his dimly lit face. "He's searching for something much more important than that, Kenley." She sighed. "Look, I'll admit, Draco Malfoy is a selfish prat and a pain in the arse, but this time, he's on to something. Do you know why we're looking for muggleborns who've had their medical records altered?"

Kenley shook his head mutely, the brightness of his red hair softened in the dim light.

"Because the boss received a tip that this unit has been experimenting on muggleborns with untested potions and some of them have been dying."

Brown eyes wide, Kenley stared at his tawny-haired partner. "What?"

"You heard me. I heard Malfoy talking with Peterson about it before we left. Point is, that's what we're looking for and so far we've found over two hundred magically altered medical records from the Spell-Damage Unit. Now, once we've found all we can from the six-month period we were assigned, I'd say that Malfoy will confirm our findings with his own Healers and then take it to the DMLE and the press. Once it's made public, the DMLE will _have_ to act. Don't you see? The sooner we finish this, the sooner they'll stop this from happening to anyone else! My best friend is a muggleborn, and if it takes hours in a broom closet to make sure she's not the next victim, then that's what I'll do."

Kenley was quiet for a moment, then looked at his partner. "Pass me that pile over there"

Andrea smiled briefly and continued on with her testing. It was a particularly tedious task because she had to first test the original record for signs of magical tampering. If it showed such signs, she used _geminio_ charms to replicate the record, then used a slightly illegal but very useful variation of the _revelio_ charm to view the original record, which she would then copy. Finally, she had to restore the record back to its altered state with the _reverto_ charm. Whilst not the most scintillating task, it was more than worth it.

Six hours later, the two investigators looked at one another and then at the pile of copies in front of them. They smiled and spoke simultaneously.

"Gotcha."


	15. Chapter 15: Sooner or Later

**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, just my little story.**

_A/N: Hello hello, guess who's back? First off, I want to apologise for the lengthy delay- I am sooooo sorry! As I'm sure you've all guessed, I've been sick (again) on and off the past few weeks. That being said, I really have to thank all of the lovely people who PM'ed me or sent well-wishes by review- I was so touched and an I am truly thankful for your care and concern._

_I''d also like to let you know that the next update unfortunately won't be for another month at least as I am going away to relax a bit and try improve the old health (doctor's orders) and won't have my laptop (also doctor's orders)._

_I hope you enjoy this chapter, and as always, please read and review!_

* * *

_Hermione's Guest Room, Roma: 9:00am local time_

Harry awoke slowly, rubbing his eyes tiredly. _What time is it?_ he wondered sleepily, seeing the sun's rays peeking through the curtains.

A glance at the old-fashioned clock on the beside table revealed that it was already nine 'o'clock. He was surprised that he had slept so late. He was ordinarily an early riser and liked to go for a run early in the morning before breakfast. But then, he had slept pretty badly, lying awake half the night and thinking over the past few days.

Sighing, he pushed the light coverings aside and pulled himself out of bed, shuffling tiredly into the spacious _en suite_.

As he stood under the hot water, slowly waking up, his mind glanced over the events of the evening before.

_Sirius had explained the surrounding locale as they stood together on the living room balcony after dinner, whilst Hermione lay sleeping peacefully on the chaise longue nearby. She had returned to the balcony after her own dinner, which she had eaten alone with Sirius, although Harry didn't really understand why as Sirius had eaten his own dinner with Harry. So why hadn't Hermione wanted to eat with them? Was it something to do with that potion and the fact that she was afraid to eat? He frowned- her behaviour was worrying, to say the least. After dinner, it seemed she had fallen asleep almost immediately after she returned to the balcony. Hermione never slept after dinner! Just how ill was she? Was anyone going to tell him what was going on? Not that he deserved to know, really…._

_Later that evening, Harry had gone for a walk to clear his head. He had wandered around the Gardens for a few hours, unseeing and unaware of the beauty surrounding him as he stumbled along, lost in thoughts of love, guilt and betrayal. He had returned to the flat after nine, and found Hermione curled up on the couch, writing a letter, which he later learned was to Luna. He was surprised- he had not known that Hermione kept in contact with Luna. In fact, he had not heard from the unique blonde girl since the final battle. He had felt a momentary shame at that thought- Luna had proved to be a truly loyal and steadfast friend. Why hadn't he ever bothered to stay in contact with her? He had frowned at that- there were so many of his own actions he just couldn't explain, even to himself. It always came back to the same question- was it him or was it the potions? Were his actions the results of a bad combination of potions or was he just an arse of the first order?_

_Sirius seemed to be reading through numerous documents, making notes as he went along. Harry knew that he had taken the week off to care for Hermione- so what were those documents? He doubted it was work…..ah well, Sirius would tell him if he needed to know, he supposed. He had sat with them for half an hour or so, but the situation was undeniably awkward. He was continually looking to Hermione, wanting to speak with her and blurt out his apologies, and, at the same time, afraid of what she might say to him. He was pretty sure he looked like a fish, opening and shutting time and again. In the end, he had given up and bidden them both goodnight, thanking Hermione once again for letting him stay. He had hugged Sirius, taking comfort from his godfather's strong presence, and gone to bed early. He had tried to read a little more in the Potter histories, but was unsurprisingly unable to focus. Eventually, he had given up and spent the night tossing and turning in the comfortable double bed._

As he towelled off and shuffled back to his room, he wondered what he ought to do today. Wasn't he supposed to start some sort of cleansing regimen?

He decided he would ask Sirius about that later. First things first- breakfast. He could afford to give the run a miss today and he'd much rather spend the time talking with his godfather. He knew he was a grown man and was responsible for solving his own problems, but there was something so inexpressibly comforting about having his godfather close by at a time like this. Perhaps it was because he had had to deal with so much by himself during his childhood? Either way, the knowledge that he had a father figure, someone who cared for him and loved him as a parent would soothed his worried mind and heart just a little.

Pulling on a white polo shirt and blue jeans, he quickly donned socks and sneakers and stepped into the hallway, turning towards the kitchen. He assumed that Sirius and Hermione would be in there by now. However, as he passed Sirius' room and was about to pass Hermione's, he stopped, hearing his godfather's voice in the next room. What on earth was Sirius doing in Hermione's room? Suddenly, he blanched. What if she had gotten sick during the night and Sirius was had to look after her? Nobody had actually sat him down and explained precisely what was going on with Hermione, so his mind automatically assumed the worst. _What have we done to her?_ He agonised silently.

Should he listen in and find out what was going on? _But it's not _right, his conscience told him. _You have no right to go around eavesdropping on people. Hermione will tell you if she wants you to know. _He wrestled briefly with his conscience (he knew how Hermione felt about eavesdropping) and won. Retreating out of sight, he peeked into the room and saw Sirius sitting on the side of Hermione's bed, brushing her hair back from her face. He looked troubled.

"Love," he was saying gently, "it's time to wake up."

Hermione groaned and slowly opened her eyes. Seeing Sirius there, a soft smile spread across her tired face.

"Siri," she said softly. "You're still here."

An answering smile spread across Sirius' face. "Of course I am, sweetheart. Where else would I be?"

Hermione shook her head. "Never mind."

Sirius gently took her chin and tilted her head up to look him in the eye. "Mione, what is it?"

"Honestly Sirius, it's nothing. Just a silly moment of uncertainty is all."

To Harry's surprise, his godfather gently shifted Hermione into a sitting position and onto his lap, gathering her into his arms as he pushed aside the blankets.

"Mione," he said quietly, "I thought we agreed we'd be honest with each other. Please don't be afraid to talk to me."

"Honestly, it's silly. Don't worry about it, Siri."

Sirius frowned. "Don't you trust me?"

Sighing, Hermione gave in and burrowed into Sirius' chest, causing Harry's eyebrows to rise almost to his hairline. _When did Sirius and Hermione get so comfortable with each other?_ he wondered. _Especially considering they're in Hermione's room, on her bed! And she's in her pyjamas. She used to be so shy….. _He leaned forward slightly to hear Hermione's almost whispered reply.

"I know Siri, and I'm sorry. I'm just embarrassed. I-I had another nightmare, a really silly one, but I couldn't get it out of my mind most of the night."

Sirius looked down at the woman he held. "What was it about, love?"

Hermione buried her face in his chest and mumbled her reply into his shirt, only to have Sirius bend his head close to her mouth so he could hear her.

"What was that, love?" He asked quietly, gently nudging her. "Didn't quite catch that."

Sighing, Hermione lifted her head and repeated what she had said.

"I dreamed that you decided to go home." Even as she said it, Harry could see that even the very idea had upset her pretty badly. Not that he could blame her- he personally found Sirius' presence very comforting, and what with everything that had happened to her, well, he wasn't surprised she was afraid to lose Sirius. Still….he _was_ surprised just how attached Hermione was to Sirius.

Sirius gently squeezed Hermione more tightly, but said nothing, waiting for her to continue. Hermione, apparently sensing that she wasn't going to get out of this, closed her eyes in resignation and spouted the rest of the information in a single breath, as if to get it over with.

"You left because I was too much of a burden. You didn't want to have to bother with me anymore and you said I was-cramping your lifestyle, that you'd never get back on the dating scene if you stayed cooped up in my apartment, that you had more important things to do than look after a self-hating freak. You said you were sorry and then you left."

Sirius was silent for a moment, and then spoke quietly. "Do you really believe that?"

"Of course not, it was just a nightmare. I know you're not going anywhere- I trust you…"Hermione trailed off as Sirius shook his head.

"No, I don't mean that, love, although I'm glad to hear it. I mean, do you honestly believe that you are putting a kink in my style, so to speak?" Sirius looked at her, his grey eyes clear as he looked her directly in the eye.

Hermione blinked. "I hadn't- that is, it's not-" She stopped and looked down at her hands. "I hadn't exactly thought of it in those terms, but I can't deny it's true."

She looked up again, looking almost _ashamed_. "I know you want a family, Sirius. I know you want someone of your own. And this place isn't exactly crawling with eligible single women. I know very well that you could be out there meeting people, meeting the woman you'll love for the rest of your life, and instead you're here caring for me. I know you don't think of it that way but Sirius, I am holding you back."

Harry held his breath, almost afraid to hear what Sirius would say. On the one hand, what Hermione said was true; Sirius could have been out there meeting people, getting on with his life. On the other hand, Hermione was very important to Sirius and he guessed his godfather would consider anything else (with the exception of Harry himself) a distant second. Either way, he was sure Sirius would not like what Hermione had just said.

Harry was therefore understandably surprised when Sirius simply grinned and tightened his arms around Hermione. "Believe me love, you have absolutely nothing to worry about- you're not holding me back at all."

"But"-

Sirius cut off Hermione's protest with a finger on her lips before she could get more than a word in.

"Sweetheart, I promise you, it's not a problem. I'm not quite ready to jump into another relationship just yet- I want to see Lira and her accomplices put away first. I won't rest easy until that's done. As for finding the right woman, I promise you, it's not an issue. She'll find _me_ when she's ready."

He stopped for a moment, and, to Harry's surprise (_what's with all this touchy feely stuff? He wondered_), kissed her nose. "Believe me Mione when I tell you there is absolutely nowhere I would rather be."

Hermione smiled and snuggled into Sirius' chest once more, enjoying the feel of his arms about her. A small, traitorous thought in her mind told her to enjoy it while she could because once Sirius found his other half, she wasn't going to get all the cuddling and affection she got now. She frowned and squelched that thought; Sirius had always been affectionate with her and she was certain he wouldn't stop just because he was seeing someone. _How do you know? The voice whispered. You've never been __this__ affectionate before, even with Sirius. Soon it will be HER sitting on his lap, HER getting our hugs and kisses….._ Shuddering, Hermione tried to ignore the fact that the idea of Sirius putting his hands on some unknown woman bothered her immensely. Sirius was a friend, and a free man- he could do whatever he liked. _Couldn't he?_

"Alright love, time to rise and meet the day," Sirius winked, interrupting her thoughts. "So, you think you can manage a bath on your own, my lovely Mione, or do you require the services of the devilishly handsome Padfoot?"

Harry shook his head. Teasing or no, he could live without _that_ image in his head. _Bloody Padfoot_. He brought his attention back to the strange scene playing out in front of him.

To Harry's surprise Hermione was blushing lightly and grinning at the raven-haired man cradling her in his arms.

"Sadly, O devilishly handsome Padfoot, I think I ought to be able to manage it all by myself today."

Sighing theatrically, Sirius stood up and started carrying Hermione to the ensuite. "Fine, fine, if you want to take away the best part…."

Hermione giggled and swatted Sirius' shoulder. "Silly man, believe me, you're better off not seeing." Then, as if realising what she had said, she blushed deeply and buried her face in his shoulder. Strangely, Sirius didn't laugh, but shook his head and muttered something that Harry couldn't catch.

Hermione lifted her head. "What's that, Siri?"

Pasting a grin on his face, Sirius shook his head. "Nothing, love. Just being a sour puppy about being denied a glimpse of your glowing beauty….."

_Sour puppy? _Harry tried his hardest not to laugh.

Shaking her head, Hermione sighed. "Only you could say that, Siri…"

Their voices trailed off as they entered the bathroom. A few moments later, Sirius came back out, calling over his shoulder, "You sure you can manage, love?"

"Yes, I'm sure!"

Suddenly realising that it might not look too good if he were to be caught eavesdropping, Harry decided to high tail it to the kitchen and start finding some breakfast. Tiptoeing away, he made his way to the kitchen and started rifling through the fridge for some bacon.

"Second shelf, right hand side. "

Harry jumped. He hadn't realised that Sirius had come into the kitchen.

"Morning Padfoot. Sleep well?"

"Not really, Hermione had a rough night, so I didn't get back to bed until about three," the older man said. "About the same time you fell asleep, wasn't it?"

Harry stared. "How did you know that? The door was closed…." He trailed off at the look Sirius was giving him.

"_Pup_," he chuckled, emphasising the word, "you do remember what my animagus form is, don't you?"

Harry laughed sheepishly. "I forgot about the enhanced hearing."

"Enhanced _senses_ Harry-not just hearing. You'd be surprised how sensitive my other sense are- I can see quite a bit better than your average wizard. I can hear things more clearly, as you know. Sense of taste is amplified- and the sense of smell. I can smell _much_ more than you'd expect."

Harry gulped, somehow sensing this wasn't good news for him. "Oh?"

"Yes, it's incredible really. For example, I can smell if a person's lingered in a certain location just by their scent."

Harry winced. "Oh."

"Yes, 'oh'. Your shower gel is pretty distinctive, Harry, and I was fairly certain it wasn't mine or Mione's."

Sighing, he turned to face his godfather. "I know I shouldn't have eavesdropped, I just…I know she's sick, and I don't really know what's going on, and when I heard you in there…."

"You assumed the worst, and thought something had happened to her" Sirius finished.

Nodding, Harry swallowed noisily. "I know it was wrong, and I don't have the right to spy on her, especially now. I have to earn back her friendship before I can expect her to confide me again... if I _can_ earn it back…if she still wants me around…oh Merlin." He paused. "Are…are you very angry, Padfoot?"

Smiling reassuringly at his godson, the taller man slipped an arm about younger man's shoulders. "No, I'm not angry, pup. And I didn't say anything to Mione either- but you will."

"Alright," Harry sighed, knowing it was pointless to argue. "I'll apologise for spying and invading her privacy and – wait, how do you that?"

Sirius blinked. "What? Apologise?"

"No, how do you manage to make me feel like a bumbling fifteen year old again?"

"Ah, that's a godfatherly secret- I can't tell you. You'll have to learn it for yourself." Sirius smirked.

"But-but I AM a godfather! I've been Teddy's godfather for three years!"

"Sorry, five year minimum in the job before you can be told." Sirius told him, his expression mock stern.

"Yeah right- you just made that up!"

"Prove it, " Sirius smirked.

"Never mind," Harry huffed. "Not that important." He paused for a moment, then smiled at his godfather. "You know Padfoot, that's the first time in two days that I've really felt like smiling. I know I haven't shown it lately, but I'm so glad you're here- I mean, that I'm here…." He frowned. "No, wait, that didn't come out right. I mean, I'm so glad I'm here with you, and that you didn't give up on me." Then, in a quieter voice, "I'm glad you came back, Padfoot. I don't think you'll ever know what it means to me to have you back."

Sirius said nothing and gathered him into a firm fatherly embrace. "I think I do Harry," he said quietly. "I think I do." He cleared his throat roughly. "As for giving up on you- I told you, you're as dear to me as if you were my own. You're my brother's son- do you really think I could ever give up on you?"

Harry said nothing, and held onto his godfather, revelling in the feeling of having someone who wanted to look after him. Sirius was the closest thing he had ever had to a parent. With Sirius, he didn't have to be Harry Potter, saviour of the wizarding world and auror extraordinaire- he could be Harry. Just Harry. And right now, light words and banter aside, Harry was hurting and needed comfort from his godfather.

Sirius stayed silent knowing that Harry would need some time to process his thoughts and just held on, letting Harry know that he was there, letting him draw strength from him.

After a time, Harry drew back with a sigh and smiled crookedly at his godfather. "Thanks Padfoot. You know, for someone who's only fifteen years older than me, you're pretty good at this father thing."

"Ah, but of course! I am Padfoot the Great, Padfoot the Wise! I am the All-Knowing, All-Seeing Padfooted One!" Sirius declaimed haughtily. "Mere years cannot not hamper my expert abilities!"

Harry snorted and turned back to the fridge to pull out the bacon and eggs."Right, O Padfooted One, if you wouldn't mind lending your expertise to cooking these eggs, I'd be much obliged. Your godson is a growing boy and needs sustenance."

"Actually, I would mind. Fina and Ale would be mortified if we stole their thunder, and they're in charge of the kitchen this week. If I were you, I'd step away from that bacon quick sharp."

Frowning in confusion, Harry slowly rewrapped the bacon and put it and the eggs back in the fridge. "Who are Fina and Ale? You mentioned them yesterday…. Are they friends of Hermione's?"

Sirius, however, simply smiled and called out, "Fina! Ale!"

Immediately, two pops sounded and the two two house-elves appeared in the kitchen, bowing low. "_Buongiorno, Signore _Black! _Come Sta?"_

_"Va bene, grazie," _Sirius smiled. "_E voi_?

The two elves beamed. "_Molte bene, Signore, grazie." _They then turned to the somewhat stunned looking Harry and bowed once more.

"_Buongiorno, Signore, siamo Fina e Ale!"_

Harry blinked. "Er, hello?"

_Hello? _He thought to himself. _Hello? Is that really the best I can do? Bloody hell, I sound like an idiot! _

At this, the female elf (at least, Harry was fairly certain she was the female elf judging by the skirt and blouse she wore), beamed and answered in English.

"Ah, English? _Scusa_, _Signore_, we not know. We Fina and Ale, we happy to work for the great _Signorina_ Granger and noble _Signore_ Black."

Harry grinned at that epithet and, as Sirius seemed to be choking in the corner, he decided to introduce himself. "I'm pleased to meet you both. I am a….friend…of Hermione's. My name is Harry." He prayed they wouldn't make the connection without his surname.

Evidently, the elves had no idea who he was. They bowed and then shooed the two wizards out of the kitchen. "We prepare breakfast, _si_? You wait and we serve when the _Signorina_ Granger is ready."

Sirius and Harry suddenly found themselves in the corridor looking at a closed kitchen door.

Harry blinked. "What just happened there?"

Sirius chuckled. "That, Harry, was the unstoppable force known as Fina and Ale. Nobody infringes on their territory and you'd better believe the kitchen is their territory."

"Right." Shaking his head, the green-eyed young man made his way to the living room and flopped onto the nearest couch. "I don't think I've ever seen house elves quite so….bold. Are they all like that here?"

"I've only met Fina and Ale, but from what Enrico and Hermione have told me, I think they are. House elves are treated very differently here and in Europe in general, pup. They're free, they have commercial and trading rights…. different kettle of fish to the UK, isn't it"

Harry exhaled. "Yeah it is."

"What's wrong, Harry?"

"Nothing," he mumbled, blinking back the sudden moisture in his eyes. "It's just, I wish Dobby could have been able to live somewhere like this. He loved being free and wanted all of the other house elves to enjoy it too. Most of them were too terrified because of the compulsion in the slave bond, but he never stopped trying." He paused, composing himself. "And if anybody deserved to have what he wished for, it was Dobby."

Sirius smiled. "Yes, he did. I'll be forever grateful for what he did for you, and for Hermione. I wish I'd known that elf."

There was a pregnant pause as Harry remembered the elf that had helped them escape Malfoy Manor. Sirius stood leaning against the doorframe, lost in his own thoughts. Harry suddenly thought of something.

"Sirius? Can I ask you something?"

Rousing himself, Sirius titled his head questioningly.

Taking a deep breath, he tried to phrase his question carefully, keeping his voice low and a watchful eye on the door. "Before...when I was…I mean, when I heard you and Hermione talking, I saw that you were, well, more comfortable with each other than I would have expected. I mean, it's just Hermione's always been so shy and I was wondering…."

Sirius finished for him as Harry trailed off. "You were wondering why Hermione seems so comfortable with me."

Harry nodded painfully. "Look, I know I don't really have the right to ask, seeing how things are between Hermione and I, but…."

Sighing, Sirius sat down on the couch next to Harry, also keeping a watchful eye on the door, waiting for Hermione to come through from the hallway.

"Well, I'm sure you've gathered that I've been the one who's been here since everything fell apart. And I'm pretty sure you know that Hermione and I have been quite close since I came back, and see each other often."

Harry nodded shamefacedly, inwardly cringing at the thought that his own godfather had been making time to see Hermione when he himself hadn't even given her a second thought.

"Yeah, I noticed you two are getting along much better than you did before you…went away."

"But you don't really understand why," Sirius guessed.

Harry nodded.

Sirius was silent for a moment. "You remember I was ill when I came back?" Seeing Harry's nod, he continued.

"It wasn't just my body that was suffering, Harry," the older man said quietly. "I was having nightmares, hallucinations, almost as if I were back in Azkaban. I didn't have a good night's sleep for months on end. You know Hermione insisted on looking after me- she fed me and cared for me for months until my body regained strength. What you don't know is that she was there when the nightmares came. She had fallen asleep at my bedside one night- you were on night duty and she told me she wanted to keep me company a bit longer that night- and she woke up to my screams. She woke me up straight away and soothed me. After that, she never said anything about it- she just cast silencing charms on the room and spent every night by my bedside. When she found that human contact soothed my nightmares, she held my hand through the night. Sometimes it was so bad she'd climb onto the bed and hold me until I settled. It was like that for months on end. She slept most nights in the chair next to my bed." Sirius barked a laugh. "She wouldn't leave either. Each morning, when I realised what had happened, I'd try to persuade her to go home and rest, that I was getting better and I was sure I'd be fine. We neither of us spoke of the nightmares, but we both knew that was what it was about. She'd just give me that look of hers, the one that said I wasn't fooling anyone, and she stayed right where she was. She stayed with me for all those months until the nightmares stopped, even when my body had healed and she had gone back to work; she'd apparate straight to my room when the rest of you had gone to bed. God knows how she coped, walking around exhausted as she was and staying with me all night." Drawing a deep breath, Sirius turned his grey eyes to his godson. "Now do you see, Harry, why I can never repay her for what she did? I was an ass before I went through the veil- I was half mad with isolation and mental exhaustion and I treated her badly, even though I knew I owed her my life even then. And despite all of that, despite my own callous behaviour, she never left my side. She nursed me back to health, literally chased the nightmares away. Nothing I could ever do can repay her for that."

Harry stared at his godfather in shock. "You- you were going through all that? Why didn't you say something Padfoot? I would have stayed home with you."

Sirius shook his head. "That's why I didn't say anything, Harry. You were still in the Auror Academy and you were accompanying the aurors on patrols most nights. You were in your final few months of training; I didn't want to ruin that for you." Seeing the hurt on Harry's face, Sirius rushed to reassure him. "I didn't keep it from you because I didn't want you around or because I didn't trust you- I kept it from you because NO ONE was supposed to find out. I wasn't going to be a burden to anyone." He barked a laugh. "Of course, I didn't bank on that stubborn, beautiful, big heart of Hermione's. No matter how I tried to tell her that I was fine and she didn't need to bother, she bulldozed over my objections and carried me through the whole thing."

Harry laughed, in spite of himself. "She does that, doesn't she? No matter how many times I tried to pretend I was fine, she always saw right through it. She knew I'd go after you in third year. She knew I was torn up about the Tri Wizard, she knew what all those lies and speculation were doing to me in fifth year, when I was convinced I was possessed…she always knew and she just wouldn't go away. She was always there, looking after me. Even-even, now."

"That girl is something else. You know, she reminds me so much of your mother- big heart, scary brains, a natural beauty and completely selfless. " Sirius' eyes were clear as he stared straight ahead.

Harry nudged the older man until he turned to face him. "Mione-she really means a lot to you, doesn't she."

Sirius didn't hesitate. "She does. I love her very, very much."

Harry was desperate to ask if there was more it to than that, but sensed now wasn't the time. It was just as well he held his tongue because at that moment he heard quiet, faltering footsteps from the hallway.

"Mione!" Sirius sprang up and dashed over to the doorway. A few moments later, Hermione wobbled uncertainly into view, leaning heavily on the wall. Sirius slipped her arm about his shoulders and supported her weight as she slowly made her way to the living room. She stumbled to the nearest armchair and sat down, exhaling tiredly and rubbing her hands on her red velour tracksuit. Harry frowned- she didn't look too good. Her face was about as grey as her t-shirt- a t-shirt, he noted, that hung badly on her in the wrong places. She _had_ lost weight.

Suddenly nervous, Harry cleared his throat. "Morning Mione."

"Good morning Harry," she mumbled tiredly.

Sirius frowned. "Mione sweetheart, you should have called me to run you a bath- I KNEW it was too soon for you to try a shower. And why didn't you call me when you were ready? Walking from your room obviously took it out of you."

Hermione smiled wanly. "Sirius, I have to start trying to walk at least short distances on my own- I can't expect you to carry me everywhere! Besides, I'm much better today- I managed to stand and stay standing and I walked. That's more than I managed yesterday."

"Yes love, I know, but I still don't' want you tiring yourself out too quickly. There's no need to rush and Padfoot's Taxis Service is right here and at your disposal," Sirius winked, dropping a kiss on the top of her head.

"I know Siri, but I have to try to regain my mobility. It seems like I've been in bed forever."

Sirius opened his mouth to reply, but at that moment two pops announced the presence of Fina and Ale.

"_Buongiorno_ Signorina Granger! You are feeling better today? But no, you are not well, Fina can see! We serve breakfast here so you can rest!"

Hermione gently interrupted the worried little elf. "No thank you Fina, I would like to eat in the dining room. Honestly, I'm ok. I'm just a little tired. I'm sure" and here she seemed to steel herself "that all I need is a little food and I'll be just fine."

Fina looked at Sirius uncertainly. Sighing, he nodded and the elf popped away, leaving Ale to lead them to the dining room. Without warning, Sirius scooped Hermione into his arms, causing her to gasp in surprise, and followed the elf.

Harry, slightly stunned, followed his godfather out of the room and into a plush formal dining room with beautiful, old-fashioned furniture he hadn't seen before. He watched as Sirius lowered Hermione carefully into a chair, and then whispered something to her. Hermione bit her lip and then nodded decisively. Sirius squeezed her shoulder in what appeared to be silent support and then stepped over to his own chair. Harry decided to sit across from his godfather.

Another 'pop' and breakfast was served. Strangely, Hermione was looking at the delicious looking yogurt with apprehension. Suddenly, Harry remembered what Sirius had said about Hermione refusing to eat because of the potions Ginny had given her. He swallowed, his stomach suddenly feeling hollow. Was that why Hermione was looking at the food as if she were afraid it would bite her? And was that why Sirius was practically speaking to her with his eyes? Harry flinched, his guilty conscience screaming at the thought of what had been done to his friend- _the friend you ignored_, his mind reminded him. Something told him that this was going to be a _very_ difficult meal.

* * *

_Hermione's room, Roma: 11:00am local time_

"Are you _sure_ you're up to it, love?" Sirius asked again.

"_Yes_."

Sirius hid his smirk- he knew that tone very well. It was the one she used when she was digging her heels in; it was evident that Hermione had made up her mind to go to the Borghese Gardens this morning and _no one_ was going to change her mind.

Harry was currently in his room changing into shorts.

"Alright then love, you might want to get changed- it's warm outside…." Sirius trailed off, looking closely at Hermione, his eyes narrowing, thoughts racing. Here was an opportunity to help Hermione build up her confidence. And seeing that they were alone….yes, it might just be time to try to put his plan in motion. But first, he silently cast _mufflatio_. He knew Hermione would panic and he didn't think she'd want Harry to overhear.

"You know what love, why don't you let me take care of it?"

Hermione's eyes grew wide. "W-what do you mean?"

Sirius winked. "I'll transfigure your outfit now- no need to tire you further. You trust me don't you?"

"Yes, but-"

Sirius cut her off. "No buts. I'll take care of it." Before she could protest any further, her tracksuit had been transfigured into a pretty, knee-length floral sundress in pale yellow with wide shoulder straps. Her slippers had been come flat, pale yellow sandals.

"There you are, love- very pretty." he told her, trying not to ogle her beautiful figure.

Hermione turned to glance at her reflection and gasped. "Siri, I….I can't wear this, I don't-I look too f-fat, please don't make me go out looking like this. Please."

Her desperate tone tore at his heart but he knew he couldn't give in- not if he really wanted to help her.

"Love, you look lovely- truly, you do. Please trust me." He begged her.

However, it seemed as though Hermione was becoming more and more panicked, her eyes growing wild. "No, no! I can't, I can't! Look at me! I can't wear this. I've changed my mind, I want to stay home."

"No, love, don't give in to this. Remember, it's that wretched potion poisoning your mind, don't give in now!"

Hermione was crying now, her motions frantic. "No, I can't, I can't! I look hideous! My arms, oh, when did they get so thick? And my legs! And I need a dark colour, I can't wear this! Please Sirius, please!"

Sirius cringed, gathering her into his arms. "Shhhhh," he soothed, "it's OK Mione, it's OK. It's not true, none of it is true. Please sweetheart, you have to listen to me."

Hermione said nothing as she trembled in his arms. Sirius mentally kicked himself for the pain he was causing her. _It can't be helped, _he thought desperately. _I promised to help her and I have to try, no matter how painful for either of us._

"Mione," he whispered. Still she continued cry, caught in the web of self-loathing the _humilitas_ trapped put her in. Putting his lips close to her ear, he couldn't help but place a tiny kiss on the soft lobe. "Love," he whispered so very softy. "Please, look at me."

Slowly, Hermione lifted her tearstained face and he had to fight the urge to kiss the tears from her soft cheeks. _Watch it, Padfoot, don't scare her,_ he thought to himself. She was still trembling.

Gently caching her face in one hand, he placed one hand on her shoulder.

"Sweetheart, you have to trust me. Let me help you beat that potion. Don't give in to Ginny's madness now! Remember what we said? Look at yourself through _my_ eyes, Mione. Let me be your eyes."

Hermione sniffled. "How? How can I see past that disgusting image in the mirror?"

"You can remember that what you see isn't _real_, love. It's an illusion, a trap to torture you in your own mind. Want to know what you really look like?"

She nodded, her face red and tear-streaked.

"Then trust me. " He drew a deep breath, letting his hand drift softly over her collarbone.

"I see beautiful, smooth white shoulders," and here he could not help running his hand lightly over her left shoulder and down her arm, noting her shudder and feeling ridiculously pleased at how sensitive she was to his touch, "and gorgeous feminine arms. How can they be firm and yet so soft and smooth at the same time? They're just right, love, just right. I see gorgeous, curvy hips" running his hand ever so slightly down her left side, " framing a lovely, soft flat tummy," here he brushed his hand lightly across her tummy. He grinned devilishly. "One day I might tell you what I like about your torso in greater detail. But let's move a bit lower. I see smooth, long, shapely legs with the most adorable little toes I've ever seen. But more beautiful still, Mione, "and here he cupped her face again, bringing his face close to hers. His voice dropped almost to a whisper as his eyes fixed on hers, one hand lightly tracing her face, "I see a gorgeous, natural face, with the softest, smoothest skin I've ever touched. I see beautiful eyes, eyes so deep a man could drown in them and die happy, framed with thick lashes any woman would kill to have. I see a sweet little nose I can't keep from kissing" here he dropped kiss on the tip of her nose, "and two perfect cheeks with high cheekbones. I can't wait to see your cheeks rosy and healthy again, love. You really have no idea just how pretty they are. And last, and definitely not least, I see two lush, perfect, plump lips…..lips so soft and sweet it's all I can do not to…." He trailed off as he stared at her lush little mouth, his thumb brushing lightly across her lips. Despite the warning bells shrieking in his head that he ought to stop, that it was too soon, he found himself leaning closer still. Her mouth was now a hair's breadth away. Hermione was panting lightly, her lips slightly parted, her luminous eyes wide with surprise….and something else. If he were to lean forward ever so slightly their lips would meet, he could taste her sweet lips again, properly this time….and she would be upset and vulnerable and he would be taking advantage of her. _She deserves better than that_, he chastened himself, drawing his head a little further back. _She deserves to have a kiss worth remembering, a happy kiss, not one given in a moment of panic. Bloody well keep your hormones in check, Black, or she'll think you're just affectionate because you feel sorry for her! Is that what you want?_

Taking a deep breath, he focused on Hermione's flushed face -_Merlin but she looks pretty when she's blushing_, he groaned to himself- and smiled. "You see, love? What I see and what you see are very, very different."

Hermione nodded, drawing a deep breath of her own. He was pleased to see that she was no longer crying.

"You…you really see all of that?" She whispered.

"I really do."

She swallowed. "Truly? You're not just saying that to make me feel better?"

Sirius shook his head. "Truly. I will never lie to you, Mione."

Hermione sighed softly, her breath fanning across his face, making him want to grab hold of her and kiss her senseless. Somehow, he restrained himself. Barely.

"I just don't know how you can see all that," she said quietly. "You make me sound like some kind of beauty and I'm-I'm just ME."

Sirius smiled, drawing her into his arms and burying his face in her hair and inhaling its fragrance. "And that's just it, Mione- it IS you. All of it." Pulling away he held her at arm's length and looked deep into her eyes, letting her read his absolute sincerity. "Mione, I can honestly say that you are the most beautiful woman I know."

Hermione froze, staring at him in disbelief. "You- you can't mean that." She searched his eyes for the pity she was sure was driving him to say these things. But she could find nothing but the truth in his eyes. She inhaled sharply. "You _do_ mean it. How-"

Sirius stopped her mouth with his hand, trying desperately to ignore the softness that was beneath his fingers. "I mean it because it's true. I know you don't see it and you might not see it for a very long time, but I swear to you it is the truth. What it comes down to is, do you trust me?"

Hermione nodded without hesitation, causing a pang of fierce joy in his chest.

"Then I'm going to ask you to act on faith. Use my eyes, go by what I see and not what you see. Come out to the Gardens today, love. You look _so_ pretty in that dress. Come with me and I promise you, you won't regret it."

Hermione paused, obviously torn between the negative thoughts and doubts in her head and Sirius' words. Finally, after what seemed like forever, she closed her eyes and nodded.

"Alright, she whispered, her hands trembling. "Can-can I wear a jacket?"

Sirius pursed his lips in thought. "Tell me honestly, do you want to wear it because it's cold or because you want to hide yourself as much as possible?"

Flushing, she whispered, 'B-because I want to hide. I'm sorry, Siri, I'm ruining your efforts already."

Sirius smiled widely at her, dropping a kiss on top of her head. "No, love, you didn't. You were honest and you're trying to beat that fear- I can't ask for anymore than that." Waving his wand, he summoned a light black cardigan from the closet, changed it to the same yellow as her dress and handed it to her.

"Keep it with you, love and when you are cold, put it on. I trust you to be honest about that."

Trying to smile, Hermione clutched the cardigan as though it were a lifeline. "Thank you Siri.

"No problem love. I should tell you though, if you do manage to keep the jacket off for the whole time, there's a rather nice treat in store for you.

"There is?" Hermione's chocolate eyes went wide, making it _very_ hard to continue behaving himself. "What is it?"

"Ah, ah, ah, love- it's a surprise. You'll find out when you see it and not before. It's all part of Padfoot's Perfect Pampering Plan."

In spite of herself, Hermione laughed. "Padfoot's Perfect Pampering Plan?"

Sirius smiled. "That's better love. You have the most wonderful smile, you know."

Hermione blushed. "It's nice of you to say –" she began, but Sirius cut her off.

"Love, I'd like you to try something for me. Will you?"

"I-yes. What is it?" She asked

"From now on, whenever anyone gives you a compliment, please, for my sake, try not to reject it. Instead just smile and say thank you, no matter how much you think you don't deserve it. OK?"

Hermione looked mystified. "I, well, I can try, I suppose, but it won't be easy changing the habits of a lifetime…anyway, what good will that do?"

"Just trust me, sweetheart. It'll help."

She nodded, then sighed. "Alright Siri, I trust you. And-and I'll try to stay-like this- for you."

"Thank you sweetheart," he smiled.

She flashed him a quick smile and then began making her way slowly to the dressing table.

"Anything you need love?"

She pointed. "Just my hairbrush. Oh, and my sunglasses and hat, I suppose."

"Right. Hang on." With that, he helped her to the bed, where he carefully seated her. He summoned her hairbrush to her hand, followed by her hat and sunglasses.

Watching as she ran the brush through her glorious brown curls, Sirius couldn't help but stare at the eye-catching sight. He could watch her do that forever. He could just see it now- Hermione sitting at her dressing table in their bedroom, pulling the brush through her beautiful chestnut locks whilst he stood behind her, his lips at her neck... Catching his thoughts before they went in a _very_ dangerous direction, Sirius shook himself and looked away. _Your bedroom? Lips at her neck? Bloody hell Black, you're not a high school boy with a crush- calm the bloody hell down and act your age or you'll drive her away!_

"Siri?"

Her voice broke into his thoughts.

"Yes, love? You ready to go?" Seeing her nod, he gently set her hat on her head and tried not to stare as she hooked her sunglasses to the neckline of her dress, which, whilst more than modest, definitely hinted at the curved beauty within. _Focus, you over-sexed idiot, focus_, he growled to himself.

Hermione stood slowly from the bed and Sirius moved quickly; slipping her arm about his shoulder, he firmly wrapped his right arm about her waist and moved slowly forward with her. Opening the door, they made their way slowly to the Atrium, where a polo shirt and cargo short clad Harry awaited them.

"You ready?" He asked with a forced lightness to his tone.

Sirius noted that Harry couldn't hide his subtle appraisal of Hermione. _Is he eyeing her up or is he worried about her? _he couldn't help but wonder. He suddenly realized how ridiculous his line of thought was. _Get a bloody grip, old man! _He thought ruefully to himself. He smiled at his godson and nodded.

"Yes, we're ready to go Harry. I'll apparate with you Mione, and Harry, you know the spot?"

His godson nodded. "Yeah, that bunch of trees on the side path leading to the _Galleria_. We'll meet on the path and find a nice spot." He frowned. "What about food? If we're having a picnic, don't we need food?"

Sirius grinned. "You leave that to me, pup." He had planned this pretty well, if he did say so himself.

"Er, righto….what about a blanket?"

Patting his jeans pocket, Sirius couldn't help smiling smugly. "Got it."

Shaking his head at his godfather's strange, slightly hyperactive attitude, Harry stuck his hands in his pockets and turned on the spot.

Sirius turned to Hermione and gently swept her into his arms. "Ready, love?"

She nodded apprehensively.

"You look beautiful. Trust me." Dropping a kiss on the tip of her nose, he tightened his arms around her. "Hold on tight, sweetheart."

With that, he turned on the spot and reappeared a moment later in a familiar grove of trees in the Borghese Gardens.

Carefully setting her on her feet, Sirius glanced quickly around to make sure they hadn't been spotted. Slipping his arms about Hermione's shoulder and waist, he slowly guided her to the concrete path where Harry awaited them.

"There's a nice spot over there," Harry told them. "Nice and shady and it's not too crowded." He turned and led the way to a lovely spot under the trees with a wonderful view of the gardens and the _Galleria _itself, set against the backdrop of a clear, sunny blue sky.

Glancing around to ensure no one was looking, Sirius pulled a tiny cloth from his pocket. Hermione recognised it as a shrunken down picnic blanket. Very carefully moving behind Harry to hide the cloth from view, he very subtly pulled his wand and resized it, laying the blanket on the grass. Before they could sit down, however, he whispered "Ale" and a tiny picnic basket appeared in his hand. He resized it, and then slipped his wand back into his jeans pocket.

After carefully helping Hermione to seat herself on the rug, he unceremoniously flopped down next to her and slipped on a pair of sunglasses. Harry sat down and started poking through the picnic basket.

"Hungry already Pup? he chuckled. "We finished breakfast just over an hour ago!"

Harry merely glanced at him sheepishly and then kept poking through the contents of the basket.

"Hey, look, garlic bread! And _focaccia_! And what's this- they look like tiny pizzas! Oh and drinks too! I swear I love those elves!"

Grinning, Sirius winked at his godson. "Wait until you see what they've prepared for lunch."

Harry's green eyes grew wide. "There's lunch too?"

"As soon as I ask for it."

Harry sighed with pleasure, looking about him happily. At that moment, he was a far cry from the broken young man who had arrived yesterday. Sirius was overjoyed to see him looking happy and carefree for a few moments.

"This is what I've always wanted more than anything- family, simplicity….enjoying good food and beautiful scenery. Luxury and contrived comfort and formal occasions can't even begin to compare. It's something Ginny could never…"Harry trailed off, his expression darkening as the reason for his presence in Rome intruded once more.

He glanced apologetically at Hermione. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to bring her up."

Hermione smiled wryly. "It's OK Harry, I'm not made of glass and I won't shatter if you say her name."

Harry choked a laugh. "Yeah, but _I_ might."

Hermione paused, not knowing what to say to that. Harry, however, beat her to it.

"I'm sorry, Hermione. I know I have no right to complain to you, of all people."

Sighing, Hermione adjusted her dress and folded her legs under her. "Look, Harry, it was bound to come up sometime. We both know we have to talk. No matter what's happened between us, I still care about you." She absently noted that Sirius was no longer there, but that Padfoot was now lying next to her, his nose in her lap. When had he snuck off to change?

Harry smiled bitterly. "And it's more than I deserve." Suddenly, he was unable to hold it in any longer. "Mione, I'm sorry, so very, very sorry for everything. I'm sorry I was such an insensitive, ungrateful prat. I'm sorry I forgot your birthday. I'm sorry I allowed popularity and glitz to rule my mind. I'm sorry I never appreciated you as a friend, that I took you for granted and never stood up for you. I'm sorry I chose everyone else over you- I'm sorry that all of this has happened to you and I don't even know half of it. I just- God, Mione, I'm so sorry. Please, I know I don't deserve your forgiveness, but please, I'm begging you, let me earn your trust again, let me try and make it up to you! Please! I can't-" he stopped and swallowed convulsively, then continued, softly, "I can't lose you too. Please!"

Hermione suddenly became very, very still. Padfoot, feeling the sudden tension in her body, whined softly and nosed at her hands.

Could she? Was she strong enough to let him try again after he had hurt her so very much?

"Please, Hermione, I know I screwed up, but please give me another chance! Let…let me try by myself this time- just me, no potions, no one else. I'll do better this time."

"Harry, I…I don't know what to say to you." Hermione shifted again, unconsciously seeking Padfoot and putting her arms about his warm, furry body.

"Say you'll let me try to earn you trust again! I'm not asking you to pretend nothing has happened and go back to the way we were, I just….I'm asking you to give me another chance to prove myself worthy of your trust and your friendship. Please." Tear filled green eyes blinked at her from behind his glasses.

Hermione was torn. _What on earth do I do? He has already hurt me so very badly - how can I give him the chance to do it again? I just can't go through it all again. Always coming second to everybody else, putting my heart and soul into the friendship and then have it ignored altogether, always left out of everything….I can't, I just can't. _However, a very, very small part of her mind thought differently._ You wont have to go through it again. He's not asking you to be trusty Hermione, the ever-present sidekick again, he's asking you for a chance to prove himself- what do you lose if you give him that much? _ The rest of her mind protested violently. _But what if he hurts me again? What if I find he doesn't care enough to be my friend? I don't want to be hurt again. _The small voice in the corner of her mind wouldn't give up, however. _If he doesn't care enough then you won't be any worse off than you are now. You'll be able to lay that ghost to rest and move on, but at least you'll have tried. He's begging you, he wanted to find you in the first place! You're the one who forbade Sirius and the others from telling anyone where you were, remember? He knows he's wronged you, he's begged pardon for it- what else do you want? And remember, you don't even know how much of his neglect was potion oriented! How do you know what he would have said or done if he hadn't been drugged – THE SAME WAY YOU WERE? Hell, you don't even know what he was given! Do you have the courage to do this or are you going to let Ginny win this round too?_

That jarring thought suddenly put the whole fiasco into perspective. Harry was a victim too. Yes, he had made many mistakes and several bad decisions but like her, his actions and his thoughts had been influenced by potions; no less than _four_ different potions. Who knew what that could do to a person? All he wanted was the chance to try without those interfering influences; was that really so much to ask? He had humbled himself in front of her, he had asked for pardon and another chance- could she really claim to care about him at all if she ignored that?

_The question is_, she suddenly realized_, am I a hypocrite or not? I expect people to see past my potion-induced madness; will I do the same for Harry?_

Hermione sighed. It seemed the decision was made.

"OK."

Her voice was so soft, she was certain only Padfoot had heard it. However, judging from the choked sob from the raven-haired young man in front of her, he had heard it just fine.

"Y-you mean it? You'll let me try again?"

Hermione nodded, keeping her eyes fixed on Padfoot, who wagged his tail and 'wuffed' in approval.

A sudden whine, however, was the only warning she got as Harry practically threw himself at her, causing her to lose her balance and fall backwards. She found herself lying under an irate Padfoot, who was sandwiched between her and Harry. Harry was in danger of crushing poor Padfoot because he was hugging Hermione so tightly she was almost certain the dog couldn't breathe. She knew she certainly couldn't- Padfoot was a big dog and he was being pushed hard into her by the now sobbing savior of the wizarding world.

"Thank you, thank you Mione! Oh Merlin, I can't thank you enough! I swear, you won't regret this, I'll do better, you'll see! I'll prove myself, I've learned from my mistakes, I – what's that your saying?"

Hermione wheezed, and then tried again. "Up! Air!" She gasped.

"Air?" OH!" Harry's green eyes grew wide and he jumped back so quickly he fell over. Padfoot immediately got up and shook himself, then looked at Hermione, tilting his head inquiringly.

"I'm alright, Padfoot," she told him, slowly sitting up and rubbing her chest. "I may need a new set of ribs, but I'm alright."

Padfoot stretched his mouth in a doggy grin and licked her cheek. He then turned and promptly pounced on Harry, who yelled in protest and found himself under many pounds of slobbering dog.

"Hey! Padfoot, cut it out! Stop that- STOP SLOBBERING MY FACE YOU MUTT! Get off already!"

Hermione couldn't help but giggle. Every time Harry thought he was clear, the big dog would happily shift to squash him again and then lick his face for good measure.

It took several very slobbery minutes for Padfoot to roll off his disgruntled godson and sit on his haunches, panting madly all the while. Harry sat up slowly, muttering about over-excitable dogs that needed to be kept on very short leaches. Padfoot, however, merely wagged his tail at the two of them before trotting off into the nearby trees. A few moments later, a devastatingly handsome wizard emerged from the trees, adjusting his sunglasses.

"Miss me?" He winked at Hermione as he sat next to her once more, placing her hat back on her head. Before she could reply, Harry beat her to it.

"No, I bloody well did not! I was somewhat distracted, you see, by this dirty great dog that decided to fall on bloody top of me!"

Sirius guffawed. "I'll have you know, Padfoot is NOT dirty- I bathe daily."

Harry shook his head, muttering under his breath, before turning back to Hermione.

"So, before my spectacular flying leap and the Padfoot wrestling moment…I think we sort of agreed to give it a go? I mean, I don't expect it to be like before, I know I'll have to work hard to prove myself to you again, but…you'll let me try?"

Hermione nodded slowly. "Yes, I….I can accept that. But…but Harry, you really hurt me before. I'm not saying this to make you feel guilty, but you have to understand, I felt left out and unappreciated for so long… It will take time, and I will be very cautious….can you keep going despite that? Just….just please, don't take this chance unless you really mean it. I'm not sure I could stand handle it if you didn't."

Harry nodded. "I understand, and I'll tell you now, I do mean it. I'm so grateful that you're not slapping me across the face and kicking me out, let alone giving me another chance. I…I know I hurt you before. Hell, we all did, and Sirius and the others made sure we knew it." He smiled sadly, turning to his godfather for a moment. "I hope I NEVER get on your bad side again, Sirius."

Sirius smiled at him but was unapologetic nonetheless. "It needed to be said and it was. Don't make the same mistakes twice, Harry, and I think you'll be fine."

Harry nodded. "You're right, it did need to be said." He sighed. "I can't understand how I didn't see all of this before. I still have no idea whether this was all me, or if it was all…potions, or maybe a bit of both. I just don't know anymore." He stopped. "But let's not talk about this now- no need to ruin the picnic more than I already have. Let's- let's eat something and just relax. We can get into the depressing details later- if you want to that is, Hermione."

She nodded, looking slightly apprehensive, eyeing the basket with trepidation.

Half an hour later, Hermione lay comfortably on the blanket. However, she couldn't get her eyes to close despite her exhaustion- her mind was working far too quickly. Sirius had somehow convinced her to eat a slice of garlic bread, whilst Harry pretended not to notice that anything was amiss. She appreciated that he hadn't asked her what was going on just yet; she didn't think she could handle talking about that just now. Her reconciliation (of sorts) with Harry was about all the emotional outpouring she could take at the moment.

There was so much going on that she quite simply couldn't stop racing through it all in her head: deciding how she would approach the Ginny situation, wondering how she would catch up on all the work she had missed…_What I wouldn't give to be able to take a nice long walk through the Gardens and clear my head, _she sighed.

"Something wrong, sweetheart?"

How did Sirius always _know_?

"Not particularly. I just….there's so much in my mind at the moment I just wish I could take a walk through the Gardens to clear my mind as I normally do."

Sirius smiled sympathetically at her, glancing at Harry as he sat reading the Potter Histories.. "I know love, but just a few more days…."

She sighed. "I know, I know. I just…I miss the Gardens. I used to walk through here every day, you know? It's the perfect place to think and to relax. I just haven't done that for a few days and I miss it."

"I know, love. I…..wait here. And close your eyes!"

Hermione stared stupidly at Sirius as he literally jumped up from the blanket and ran towards the path. "What?"

"Close your eyes!" He called over his shoulder.

Shaking her head, she looked at Harry, who had barely looked up from his book. "I don't suppose you have any idea what he's going to do?"

Without looking up, Harry shook his head. "Nope, but with Padfoot, it's just best to go along with it. Better do as he says and close your eyes. Hey, did you know that Elenor Gryffindor was known for her healing spells? And that that's why so many Potters become Healers? My Grandfather was a Healer, apparently….hmmm….my dad and I are the odd sheep, aren't we? Two aurors."

Hermione shook her head smilingly and closed her eyes, glad he was enjoying the gift she had had made for him. "Just because the family's magic is centered around healing doesn't mean you can't be good at other things."

"True, true…."

A sudden _clip- clop _of hoof beats sounded close by.

"You can open your eyes now, Mione." Sirius sounded excited and hopeful in the same breath.

Opening her eyes, she gasped. A horse drawn carriage sat on the path in front of them. Sirius smiled crookedly at her. "I know it's not the same as a walk through the Gardens, but…."

"Oh, Siri, how lovely! Do you know, I've NEVER been on a carriage ride! Oh, please, will you help me up?"

Sirius slowly pulled her to her feet, and then looked at his godson. "Aren't you coming, pup?"

"Nah, I'm feeling nice and comfy right here, Padfoot. Besides, the food is here…."

Shaking his head, Sirius turned to help Hermione toward the carriage, assisted her inside and then climbed in after her.

Almost immediately, the driver clicked to the horses and the carriage slowly rolled through the park.

Hermione sighed happily, so preoccupied with the joy of finally riding on a carriage (with a handsome man, no less) that she didn't realise she had left her jacket on the picnic blanket. She gazed happily at the familiar sites, sighing with pleasure.

"I take it you approve, Mione?" Sirius smiled.

"Oh, yes! I used to dream of riding in a horse drawn carriage when I was a little girl, with…." She trailed off, blushing. She had barely refrained from adding that she used to dream or riding with the man she loved, and that said man would give her a single rose and kiss her.

_Be grateful for what you have and don't dwell on what you haven't got_, she told herself. _I'm riding in a carriage through the Borghese Gardens on gorgeous day with a VERY handsome man, isn't that enough to be getting on with? Just because he doesn't love me that way doesn't mean I can't enjoy this!_

Sirius was lost in his own thoughts. _She looks so beautiful…her lips are so soft…._

_….don't kiss her you fool, bloody well get it together…._

_…but look at her! She's beautiful inside and out. She's MIONE…._

_…And she has no idea you feel that way about her- do you want to scare her off?_

Sirius sighed in his mind and acquiesced- now wasn't the time. He turned his attention firmly away from her rosy soft lips and focused on the scenery. He couldn't understand why he found it so difficult to control himself around Hermione. He had never had this problem before. _But then, _his mind told him, _you've never felt for ANYONE what you feel for Hermione_.

He was jolted out of his thoughts when the carriage jolted to a halt. Peering ahead, he saw a few children crossing the path a little way ahead of the carriage. As the driver waited impatiently for the children to move out of his path, a man carrying a multitude of roses wondered up to the carriage.

"_Rosa, rosa, che vorrebbe una rosa? Signorina, una rosa per te? Una bella rosa per una bella donna!"_

Hermione understood what was said as the translation spell came into effect. "A rose, a rose, who would like a rose? Miss, a rose for you? A beautiful rose for a pretty lady!"

Sirius stood and dug a note out of his pocket and handed it to the man. "_Quello giallo, per favore_. "

When the man handed him a lovely yellow rose, Hermione gasped. It seemed another part of the childhood fantasy was coming true.

Sirius smiled at her and he sat down as the carriage rolled forward once more. He took her hand and brushed his lips across her knuckles, smiling at the pretty blush covering her cheeks.

"A pretty rose for a pretty lady," was all he said. She accepted the rose, fighting the urge to argue the 'pretty lady" comment and raised it to her face, sniffing its delicate fragrance.

"Oh, Siri, you didn't need to do that! Thank you, it's lovely."

Slipping an arm about her waist, he pulled her to him. "It's my pleasure, love."

Sighing, Hermione lay her head on his shoulder and stared at the passing scenery. Honestly, Sirius was simply too good to her- first he took care of her, then he took her on a picnic and now he had taken her on a carriage ride and given her a rose. It was as if he were very deliberately trying to show her just how much he cared for her, how much he loved her. As friend, of course. As she cared for him. A friend. A very _close_ friend. A very close _handsome _friend who always put her first and made her feel loved and secure. A close handsome friend whom she had thought, for a very brief moment, was going to kiss her earlier today….

Hermione blinked and sat up. What was wrong with her? Why was she thinking such odd thoughts. Sirius wasn't going to kiss her- of course he wasn't. Why on earth would she even think of such a thing? It was very strange….

Distraction. She needed a distraction. She had spent far too much time being idle the past few days and it was causing her to have very odd thoughts.

In an attempt to distract herself, she turned to ask Sirius if they might have another Italian lesson this afternoon. However, just at that moment, he leaned down towards her to ask her what was the matter. Thus, as she turned his face moved towards hers. Before either one knew what had happened, their lips met.

* * *

_A/N: Don't hate me for leaving it there! The rest will follow as soon as I can manage it!_


End file.
